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A Nightmare On Any Street.

Fuel injection! Put your pedal to the metal, Dan!

If any of you are in the market for a new car at the moment, you might be interested in this eBay auction I stumbled onto the other day. Normally, I care for automobiles about as much as I do for sneakers, but as you can see, this isn't your average car. It's a 1983 Chevrolet Camaro themed after the A Nightmare On Elm Street films. In my dreams (no pun intended), this thing would have a gearshift made of bones and a car horn that plays the Elm Street theme song... but it's not quite that cool. What it does have, however, are some hilariously cheesy airbrushed graphics that I'm sure you'll appreciate. After all, we're talking about a seller who promotes the car with verbiage such as, "Freddy Krueger's back, & pissed & now he has 1200 Ponies!" Oh yeah, this is only gonna get better. (more...)



Skel-A-Flamingos: A Pop Culture Icon Becomes The Ultimate Halloween Lawn Ornament!

No pink on these flamingos! (no flesh either)

Classic lawn kitsch just got a lot spookier. Skel-A-Flamingos. SKEL-A-FLAMINGOS! It's one of those simple, obvious creations that makes you want to smack yourself on the forehead and scream, "Why didn't I think of that!?" I want these. I want to see these everywhere I go. If you have a lawn, buy fifty of these and put the entire bony flock out on display for all to see this Halloween. Also, take notice of how the box states that the Skel-A-Flamingos can be used for "special occasions". That's a bold, completely open-ended statement right there. So yeah, I expect to see these popping up at weddings, corporate events, concerts, and of course, funerals. (more...)



What Nightmares Are Made Of.


My friend Karen is training to be a nurse, and today she sent me this picture of the fucked up Satan mannequin she has to practice her stuff on. She actually has to get close to this thing and practice life saving techniques on it, take its readings, etc. I certainly don't need any medical instruments to get the only real reading you need to collect off this fucking thing: it's pure evil. (more...)



“Friday The 13th: The Series” Season 1 Finally Comes To DVD!

Why hello there! It only took you 20 friggin' years to arrive on DVD!

I'm really, really glad to see Friday the 13th: The Series finally get a DVD release. While many people thought it was lame that the series had nothing to do with the Jason Voorhees storyline, many horror fans saw it for what it was - a genuinely entertaining and suspenseful TV show. It's often been compared to the X-Files, though it predated that show by a good six years. The series was about a "Curious Goods" antique shop owner (Lewis Vendredi) who made a deal with Satan to make some mega-bucks by selling cursed antique items. He eventually broke off the deal and was subsequently killed as a result. His nephew (Ryan Dallion) and cousin (Micki Foster) inherit the store and start selling off all the items from the vault downstairs. Unfortunately for them, they learn from Lewis' old co-worker (Jack Marshak) about how the antiques were all cursed after they had already sold them off. So now, it's up to them to recover all of these cursed antiques so they can be stored in the downstairs vault where they'll never cause trouble anymore. (more...)



Kellogg’s Limited Edition Candy Corn Flavored Corn Pops Cereal: Bring It Back!

Because you've always wanted to eat Candy Corn for breakfast...
Click to enlarge.

Before you get all excited and rush to the grocery store to buy a box (or five), I'm sorry to say that Kellogg's Candy Corn flavored Corn Pops cereal was a limited edition release from back in 2001. Why they don't release these every Halloween is beyond me, because really... who wouldn't want to eat candy corn for breakfast? Admittedly, the cereal itself isn't particularly amazing looking, I would've much rather seen them make the Pops look like little candy corn shapes, but at least they got the flavor part right instead of just making it a visual novelty. If you're really desperate to try the stuff, you can find an old box of them on eBay every now 'n then, but I wouldn't recommend eating cereal that old no matter how tempting it may be. If you did, chances are you'd end up looking like the mad scientist on the box. But hey, there's nothing stopping you from enjoying a bowl of real candy corn. I bet it wouldn't even taste half bad with milk. (more...)



When Monsters Become Helpless Slingshots: Bunjie Battle Monsters!

We were made to be abused. Yeah... life is awesome.

Target is always one of the first places I stop when Halloween season begins, not just because they decorate their seasonal section so well, but because they usually have some great exclusives. I'm sure you've already seen their Domo-Kun setup this year (click here if you haven't), but out of all their new Halloween novelty items, one of the products that really caught my eye was Bunjie Battle Monsters. Why? Because they look so sad and cheap.

The idea behind these monsters is that you can stretch out their arms by sticking your fingers into the pockets built into their hands while pulling back on their feet. You then aim them at the target (no, they don't include a nice one to hang on the wall, you literally just have to use the target on the front of the cardboard packaging which is partially covered by promotional graphics) and then let 'em soar through the air. Now, I must admit, turning monsters into slingshots is definitely an original idea, but there are quite a few problems with these toys... (more...)


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