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Skel-A-Flamingos: A Pop Culture Icon Becomes The Ultimate Halloween Lawn Ornament!

No pink on these flamingos! (no flesh either)

Classic lawn kitsch just got a lot spookier. Skel-A-Flamingos. SKEL-A-FLAMINGOS! It's one of those simple, obvious creations that makes you want to smack yourself on the forehead and scream, "Why didn't I think of that!?" I want these. I want to see these everywhere I go. If you have a lawn, buy fifty of these and put the entire bony flock out on display for all to see this Halloween. Also, take notice of how the box states that the Skel-A-Flamingos can be used for "special occasions". That's a bold, completely open-ended statement right there. So yeah, I expect to see these popping up at weddings, corporate events, concerts, and of course, funerals.

If you have a lawn, cover it with these.

When I kick the bucket, I will come back and haunt you all if there aren't at least a few dozen Skel-A-Flamingos at the funeral ceremony. Actually, I'm gonna come back and haunt you all anyway, because I think that'd be one hell of a fun time. For me, at least... not for you.

Also, with the advent of Skel-A-Flamingos, somebody had damn well better make be some skeleton yard gnomes, or "Skel-A-Gnomes", to go with 'em pronto.

Attention novelty companies: you can buy the patent for these from me along with this amazing conceptual art.



Ladytink_534 (Guest) on 09/28/2008 10:02 pm

LMAO! These are too cool!

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SunnyD on 09/28/2008 10:08 pm

gnomes wear too much clothes to be effective skeletons

now zom-gnomes however....

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SunnyD on 09/28/2008 10:09 pm

or zombi-nomes if your a true geek

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saturnknight on 09/28/2008 10:51 pm

What about skeledears? or Zombie Chickens?

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Copper on 09/28/2008 11:33 pm

SunnyD brought them up first...Zombie Lawn Gnomes would be much spookier than skeleton ones. Not to mention a mummy lawn jockey.

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Crash Dummie on 09/28/2008 11:38 pm

What about skela-skeletons?

Ok, not the best idea ever.

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Dungeonbrownies on 09/28/2008 11:57 pm

i feel the gnome is far more tasteful than the flamingo, which has in itself become an icon of all things american. It almost could be a stand alone piece of avant garde sculpture prolly.


KoMoDo (Guest) on 09/29/2008 12:09 am

If my Goosebumps recollection serves me right. Lawn Gnomes are batteries for evil anyway. Making them zombies is just going to make things worse!

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-RoG- on 09/29/2008 12:37 am

Skel-A-Gnomes... Zombie Gnomes... I'm all for any of it. Just give me more spookified versions of classic lawn decorations.

That being said, I ask all of you this vital question... how can we make THESE more Halloweeny?

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Joe_Canadian on 09/29/2008 12:47 am

I must get those for my garden! Now If only they made skeleton windmill figures I'd be set for Halloween


Spikeelsucko (Guest) on 09/29/2008 3:25 am

your question's easy rog, just think of how many people have been mangled by fan blades or another circular spinning apparatus- a little silver paint and tactically applied red splatter gets the job done.

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Gourry on 09/29/2008 6:31 am

Replace the petals with little skull shapes.

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McFly on 09/29/2008 8:34 am

I think that you should replace the petals with machetes and put a hockey mask in the middle in homage to Jason Vorhees. Oh, what fun the kids can have when the wind starts spinning these blades around.


SGFAZ (Guest) on 09/29/2008 8:35 am

How to make pinwheels scary?
Add severed heads and hanged man to the wheels! And make it metal, and never oil it so it creaks!


Kyle Harkes (Guest) on 09/29/2008 8:37 am

OMG! I think I'm with Rog. I'll haunt all you people, if these aren't at my funeral. 400 of them.


Leanne (Guest) on 09/29/2008 9:55 am

The pinwheels could still be a flower, but replace the center with a disgustingly bloodshot eyeball. Maybe even add a creepily grinning mouth for good measure, with the obligatory fangs of course. The petals would be razor sharp and dripping with blood and other entrails.

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Simon Love on 09/29/2008 10:37 am

The pinwheels could also be purposefully loosened.
When a gust of wind would blow through your lawn, the blades would start spinning, to eventually detach and hit kids, zombi-nomes, skel-a-flamingos, the neighbor's dog.

And it's not your fault, you can sue the company for faulty assembly.

Can't wait to see that on youtube.

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azrael2514 on 09/29/2008 11:43 am

I used to have these things at my house in New Orleans. You could totally tell we were the cool house on the block. Well, honestly we were actually one of the only two houses and since we had gotten rid of the fema trailer in front of our place as soon as we could, that kind of made us cooler by default. The skele-mingos didn't hurt.

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Mockery on 09/29/2008 12:19 pm

Ok, somebody needs to draw us the following:

1) A Zombie Gnome (preferably chugging a bottle of Miracle-Gro plant food while all the flowers in the garden wilt around him).

2) McFly's suggestion for replacing the Sunflower Pinwheel petals with blades and making the center of the flower look like his hockey make.

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Aaarg on 09/29/2008 12:40 pm

What about those "FAT LADY BENDING OVER IN GARDEN" things? Lame.

I'm buying Skel-a-flamingos. Those are badass.

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SPINAL on 09/29/2008 3:55 pm

On sale now at your local .99 cent store or wait till Nov 1st and buy them for .33 cents

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Ant10708 on 09/29/2008 9:02 pm

Anyone know any stores carrying these?

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Aduross on 09/29/2008 11:58 pm

RoG, ask and you shall receive. :D

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Nick on 09/30/2008 1:00 am

Flamingos just became awesome.

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Carnivore Is God on 09/30/2008 1:09 am

I want these, alongside my regular flamingos.
Possibly with blood dripping from their beaks and fallen pink flamingos.
I need them.

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porkboy on 09/30/2008 6:01 am

I'll make sure not to "gnome alone" when in hell... with the skel-a-gnome. I guess "gnoming" around the world leaves you skinless... and undead.

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-RoG- on 09/30/2008 11:39 am

Ant10708, there's a few online shops selling them, and I would think you'd be able to find 'em in some seasonal Halloween shops as well.

Aduross, you rock. That's a fine Miracle-Gro chuggin' Zombie Gnome if I've ever seen one. Well done!

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Geminate on 09/30/2008 12:08 pm

While oh-so-cool Skel-A-Flamingos are, RoG, you know these wouldn't last five minutes if you put them out on a lawn in Los Angeles.

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A Bad Enough Dude on 09/30/2008 3:46 pm

Those are so tasty that even the bugs in Cronenberg's Naked Lunch would enjoy them.


ColdFusion (Guest) on 09/30/2008 6:19 pm

That is awesome in the extreme and you are awesome.

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Silver on 09/30/2008 10:05 pm

If I die at one of my combat demonstrations at Moo Duk Kwan I'll keep haunting this blog every now and then... So beware...

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MS-DOS4 on 10/01/2008 11:17 am

Damn I want some skel-a-gnome

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