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The Best Feeling In The World.

Feels so good!

After many painstaking minutes of research, I have discovered what the greatest feeling in the world is. Are you prepared for me to drop this knowledge on you? Do you think you can handle it? You may be surprised by its sheer simplicity. But therein lies its power. And the best part is, we've all experienced it.

It is better than winning the lottery (or so my research tells me). Better than drugs. Even better than receiving head from a surprisingly skilled nun.

The best feeling in the world is when you wake up in the morning thinking that you beat your alarm by only a few minutes and it's time to get ready for work. And then you take a closer look at the clock and realize that you have several hours left to sleep in. See, you just thought that you had to get up, but you totally don't have to get up! And the sleep you get between then and the real time you have to wake up is the best sleep you can ever achieve. The only thing better than that would be being woken up after that by receiving head from that surprisingly skilled nun.

And if you don't agree that's the best feeling ever? Well, fuck you! It totally is. Share your own "best feeling ever" if you disagree, but I'm telling you--the next time you experience it, just think about it in the moment and I guarantee you will have a moment where you go "Oh" all wide-eyed and mouth agape as you realize I was right, and if some random person saw just your face at that moment, they might imagine such an expression being caused by a nun's wimple bobbing up and down over your naughty bits.


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Silver on 03/21/2009 8:01 pm

Damn it, you couldn't be more right about how GREAT does it feel when you wake up thinking that it's time to leave your precious bed in order to being what could be another day in hell.

I remember that a long time ago, when I still was in high school (about six or seven years ago) I woke up during the night, thinking that I had just heard the alarm ring. I even TOOK A BATH and was preparing to get myself dressed when I realized it was just 4:00 a.m.!!! Obviously I tucked myself againd and enjoyed two more hours of sleep that made me rest a lot more.

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Silver on 03/21/2009 8:06 pm

By the way, another feeling I love (also related with sleeping) is when you just had a horrible night when you just couldn't close you eyes and have to go to your daily duties, working as a zombie if you may, only to return home and lay down on the couch to succumb to the drowsiness that follows. The downside might be that this may keep preventing you from sleeping properly the following nights, effectively making you wanting to sleep every afternoon.


Sgb (Guest) on 03/21/2009 8:11 pm

I've had that happen to me a few times but I often hated it since I would be having nice dreams and then I wake up all of a sudden, thinking I'm late to go someplace and I had only been asleep for like 45 minutes when I have like 5-6 hours to sleep and then the kicker is I can't go back to sleep till its almost time to get up and that's when the sleep hits you hard like a cinder block to the head.

What WOULD be bad is having the dream about the nun and then this happens hehe.


Frostor (Guest) on 03/21/2009 9:37 pm

It's up there. It's definitely up there.


SlikOne (Guest) on 03/21/2009 10:55 pm

You are close, but the real best feeling in the world is slightly different. You wake from a DEEP sleep, wipe the slobber off of yor cheek, think it is about time to go to work, then realize it is SATURDAY and you can go back to sleep and then do absolutely nothing the rest of the day


Number6Faye (Guest) on 03/21/2009 11:54 pm

The best feeling in the world is when you fall asleep on the couch, a mere ten minutes after putting on your Slanket, while the sheer awesomeness that is "Survivorman" blares on TV in the background. Although that waking-up-to-realize-you-have-several-more-hours-of-sleep is nice sometimes, too... :3


Mikey (Guest) on 03/22/2009 2:28 am

You're on one bro.

The best feeling in the world is when your bipolar personality starts to flip from depressed to manic.

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Copper on 03/22/2009 3:07 am

I can definitely agree with you there, especially about the best sleep part. Hell, even if it's ten minutes before the alarm goes off, if you can get back to sleep, it's often better than the hours you've just spent in bed.

Can't agree with you about the nuns, though (mostly due to biology) but I will wholeheartedly agree about being able to go back to bed.

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BigMonkeyMan on 03/22/2009 4:29 am

7 hours of extra sleep is a great feeling. The worst feeling in the world is waking up 30-45 minutes before your alarm. I'll spend the next half hour trying to get back to sleep while looking at the clock every 5 minutes just to get up and shut it off 1 minute before it goes off.

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Dungeonbrownies on 03/22/2009 5:37 am

Spring break has come, so that a Yosh! to the worlds best feeling. fantastic.

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hisholiness on 03/22/2009 6:03 am

SlikOne nailed it! that is the best feeling in the world. Actually what would make it better is if you wake up early and for some reason set the alarm then realize you don't only have to get up early, but its the first day of your vacation.... and receiving head from a surprisingly skilled nun.

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greenimp on 03/22/2009 6:47 am

i always beat my alarm clock, by 3 seconds, a friend timed it once... and apparently, i get out of bed, walk over to the alarm, turn it off, and go back to bed... all WITHOUT WAKEING UP! then exactly 5 mins later i wake up fully... its amazing what your body will subconciously do

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saturnknight on 03/22/2009 10:43 am

okay, this is gonna be nasty, but a nice Dump after a long and stressful day. Its literally a load off your mind, you know?

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Pub Lover on 03/22/2009 11:04 am

My favourite part of the day is waking up and realising I have more time to sleep. All too soon it is the worst part of the day and I have to get up.

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Tadao on 03/22/2009 12:06 pm

I don't have to work and sleep in everyday. I am no longer able to achieve the best feeling. :(

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King Credo on 03/22/2009 12:11 pm

You're way off. You start riding in a car and you have to piss worse than usual at the exact moment it's too late to turn around or stop anywhere. You ride in the car for 20 minutes and the driver hits every pot hole and bump on the road. The best feeling in the world is finally taking that piss.

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HowardC on 03/22/2009 1:05 pm

Taking a dump. No special circumstances, just taking a big ol' dump. Best feeling EVER!

Now if we could only do something about the smell.


ColdFusion (Guest) on 03/22/2009 1:10 pm

That actually kinda sucks for me, cuz it takes me a long time to get back to sleep, especially if I did things like 'look at clocks' or 'start thinking I had a task' .. and if I do get back to sleep it'll feel like I had to wake up the very SECOND I got to sleep.. it sucks balls and I would like to reduce the work week please. This is where I petition for that, right?

Nono, the best feeling ever.. is proooobably having sex.. but I spend all my time trying and failing to sleep, so I wouldn't know..

So I'm gonna say christmas presents :)

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Bavles on 03/22/2009 1:43 pm

You're almost there dude. Personally i think it's much better when you wake up in a panic thinking you're late for school or work and then realizing you have that day off. Total bliss


Doug-alicious (Guest) on 03/22/2009 2:07 pm

I thought that waking up next to your spouse after a long night of love-making was the best feeling ever. Or possibly passing out after a 15 hour work day. I dunno.


Musique (Guest) on 03/22/2009 3:52 pm

as a university student, i have to agree...
fuck, hahahahaha


albinokitty (Guest) on 03/22/2009 4:51 pm

your so right about that one, Proto. its definilty the best feeling in the world! also another best feeling for me is drinking OJ after waking up.. yeah.

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uncle on 03/22/2009 10:04 pm


The REAL best feeling in the world is accidentally setting your alarm on a day when you don't have to actually wake up. Then, you wake up to your alarm, growl, look at the day on the clock or calendar or whatever, and smile a happy "fuck you!" to the clock before dropping back into what I guarantee is the best sleep you'll ever have.

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DrewP on 03/22/2009 11:46 pm

The best feeling in the world is waking up refreshed and realizing that you never said CandleJack toda...

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Delirium on 03/23/2009 11:12 am

Sleep sucks.
I hate the idea of spending 1/3rd of my life just laying unconscious on a bed.

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bountyhunterseven on 03/23/2009 11:33 am

thats close to waking up, not knowing what day it is, thinking you have to go to work, realising its saturday, then going back to bed! all in a few seconds...
this happened to me this weekend!

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Commanderraf on 03/23/2009 2:06 pm

bountyhunterseven beat me to it, but here it goes again: The best feeling in the world is when you wake up when its dawning, thinking its a normal day, but you notice STILL IN BED that its saturday.

If you want to know which is the greatest best feeling in the world, here it is: after you notice its saturday at 6:00 am, you notice it's drizzling, so, you hear the faint sound of drops hitting your window/roof and that luls you into sleep again. Happened a bunch when I was a kid. Still love it today.


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Aries on 03/23/2009 2:23 pm

The best feeling in the world is when you drive past a cop, he pulls out and turns on his lights, you pull over and it turns out he's going after the person in front of you.

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10,000 Volt Ghost on 03/23/2009 3:30 pm

I set my alarm an hour before I actually have to get up everyday just so I get that feeling of an extra hour of sleep. It's great stuff.


JQ (Guest) on 03/23/2009 6:02 pm

I was just saying this to a friend. 2 am seems to be the magic hour for me. Also, get out of my head.


spangl (Guest) on 03/23/2009 7:23 pm

What about when you wake up a few minutes before your alarm clock usually goes off and you realize and remember that you are off of work that day.

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Popsicle on 03/24/2009 12:35 am

What about beating the fuck out of someone, you severely dislike?!?

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Mental Pooperscooper on 03/24/2009 1:18 am

Ever been stuck staying awake for nearly 3 days and finally crash after just barely stumbling into your bed? Awesome.

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OxBlood on 03/24/2009 4:27 am

The best feeling in the world is drifting away into sleep, knowing the world can fuck itself for 8 hours before it continues to get on you nerves again. ;) That would apply for normal working people. Then thereĀ“s people who just quitted society. I guess their best feeling in the world is the knowledge that the world can go fuck itself all the time :D

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fluffkomix on 03/24/2009 10:01 am

man this happened to me just this morning.

to be honest, it was my watch beeping every hour that woke me up but THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT ANY LESS SWEET >:(

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MrEff on 03/24/2009 4:28 pm

It's even better if you wake up, and then realise that it's your day off, meaning you don't have to wake in a few hours if you totally don't want to.

Then you sleep in till 3 in the afternoon.

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Nick on 03/24/2009 7:27 pm

Oh man, Proto. You hit the nail right on the head with this one.

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stevetothepast on 03/24/2009 9:02 pm

I was wondering what the feeling was, and damn that is the best feeling in the world.

or how about when you wake up look at the clock, and then realize you don't even have to go to work. that's even better!

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bazdagoff on 03/25/2009 3:02 am

Wow! This totally happened to me this morning - but alas, no nun.


Happyface (Guest) on 03/25/2009 10:23 am

Why do people keep saying the same thing about it being a day off? We fucking GET IT already. Jesus.

My personal best feeling in the world? Finding money. I found a twenty on the pavement, once. Best. Day. Ever.

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lilypad4evra on 03/25/2009 4:03 pm

Indeed it is the greatest feeling ever.

However waking up thinking that you beat the alarm by a few minutes and then you realize your alarm just never went off and your mad late is a terrible feeling. Unfortunately that happens to me more than I'd like.

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0dd1 on 03/25/2009 10:11 pm

This feeling can be improved by three simple words: Daylight Savings Time (by which I mean in the autumn, when we "fall behind", meaning +1 hour!!!).

I'd say the best feeling in the world, sleepwise, is when you've had an extremely stressful, demanding week (or so) and you can finally hit the sack and sleep it off all weekend.


Actually, one day when I was home alone and had finished all my homework early, I just sat back on the couch and closed my eyes for two hours. Not really trying to fall asleep. No real drifting away. No contemplating on the day or thinking about anything. Just two hours of nothingness. And it did wonders for me that day.
I think that the Spaniards really were onto something with the idea of a siesta.

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medevac on 03/26/2009 5:21 pm

I agree that sometimes it's the little wins in life that are the sweetest.

For me, I lived for a year in an apartment complex with the worst parking I have ever seen. Usually you would have to park 4 or 5 BUILDINGS away from your apartment if you arrived home after 8pm.

But every so often I would pull in, and like the holy fucking grail of sunshine there would be a spot...just one...right in front of my building. Like ridiculously close.

Angels would fall from the heavens, those little irritating birds from Snow White would sing and fly down and open my door for me...tiny awesome Oompa Loompas would carry my things inside like Wonka footsoldiers.



IcePlanetHoth (Guest) on 03/27/2009 11:51 am

I remember one time back in school I had woken up, absolutely dreading my first day back after break. My stomach sank almost the moment I gained consciousness. About half a second later, though, I realised I still had one more day left before I had to go back. God, I almost orgasmed.


RunningInSlowMo (Guest) on 03/27/2009 12:09 pm

The best feeling in life, I think, is actually having a job (that you can wake up in advance for).

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alittlebirdytoldmeso on 03/27/2009 3:29 pm

Naaa, one of the best feelings in the world happens the moment when the lights finally dim in a movie theater. The smell of popcorn and candy makes it extra special.

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caffman on 03/28/2009 5:34 pm

the best feeling is that moment when you wake up for work then you realise its saturday


Coolest Man Alive (Guest) on 03/30/2009 6:38 pm

What about you and your girlfriend wake up at the same time on Saturday mourning and she smiles and starts making out with you and the next thing you know your doing the same thing you did Friday night.

Ooooh yeah. Who wants coffee? KA-BLAMO!!!


maskd (Guest) on 04/03/2009 10:56 pm

just got friended on facebook by my idol. he accepted my request. going to have a heart-attack. don't even care whether i mis-hyphenated the word "heart-attack." don't care that i made up a word and the grammar was off in that last sentence.


Zaodai (Guest) on 05/05/2009 1:10 pm

That's actually one of the worst feelings in the world for me. I only sleep every 2-3 days, and it's just how my sleep schedule has been every since I was a little kid. So, once I wake up, I'm up until I'm tired enough to go to sleep again. Waking up 3 hours before I have to leave for a job just means I get to sit up tired and with a headache for 3 more hours.

The best feeling in the world, without question, is getting revenge. Especially if they're arrogant enough to think they're untouchable.

The only downside is, it means someone is looking to do the same to you, lol. That's not such a good feeling.

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