[Mac]  [PC]  

Title: Oregon Trail
Rom Player: Apple //
Reviewer: Mog

Synopsis: Ever wanted to pack your worthless shit up and move to... OREGON?! Well all your desires are fulfilled with this classic apple2 game. Basically, the objective is to get to Oregon in one piece, but saying, 'Iím goin' to Oregon Ma!' is easier than getting there. On the way, you'll face countless diseases such as Cholera, Dysentery, and inadequate grass? Okay so maybe grass isnít a disease, but you need something to haul your lazy ass the distance... But there are some stops along the way! I hate how when you need a Yoke, and some bitch is asking you 'MY BABY!! MY BABY!! WE NEED A YOKE!! ILL GIVE YOU 1 SHIRT FOR IT!' Hell no! Take your shirt and ram it, I need my spare yokes. But usually the helpless woman is really an evil witch and makes GENERIC GIRL #1 die from thirst. Damn you woman, we needed her for when we resort to cannibalism. Usually by the mountains of... hell if I know, I get bored and quit. I just canít take my little kids drowning, my wife getting the shits, and me getting my wrists slit from the Indians who want to sacrifice me. Enough babblingÖ some features of the game is CUSTOM NAMES!! Yes, this means ANY name, so if you come across an epitaph with BITCHASS on the trail; it was probably someone else. If your entire wagon party dies, you get to customize your epitaph! How Nice! I get to say something about myself... my name was Dumbass so... Iíll say 'BITCHASS - Bitched all the way and died of Strep throat. He deserved it.' Ah, just look for it and play it.

Best Cheats: Nothing Entered

Game Play: 4
Graphics: 2
Music/Sound: 1
Originality: 8
Overall Rating: 5

[Download This Game]


[Come discuss this game on our Message Forums!]


Copyright ©2000-2004 I-Mockery.com.
All Games featured on this site are registered trademarks of their respective owners.
By downloading any game roms from this site, you are agreeing to the following

[Minimocks] [Articles] [Games] [Mockeries] [Shorts] [Comics] [Blog] [Info] [Forum] [Advertise] [Home]

Copyright © 1999-2007 I-Mockery.com : All Rights Reserved : (E-mail)
No portion of I-Mockery may be reprinted in any form without prior consent
We reserve the right to swallow your soul... and spit out the chewy parts.