i'm getting fake bewbies this summer

[Two-Faced]

june 5th everyone mark your calenders

pray for me that day so i won't die
thank you and god bless

[Perndog]

You're gonna die. Have fun.

[Snatchtastic]

How big are they now? And how big will they be when you're done?

[Rez]

teen pregnancy :(

[Sethomas]

I actually have one fake breast, complete with artificial malignant growths. The joys of having a father in mamography.

[Dixie]

boobs are gross.

[Rongi]

chicken boobies taste good

[ArrowX]

another one falls to materialistic fasion

[da blob]

June 5th is still spring.
You have breast cancer ? Or were you born with a penis ?

[Spastic Colon]

It doesn't matter how "perky" they will be, they all become saggy baggies in the end. I like awkward boobies. :/

[ArrowX]

:lol :lol :lol
rofl


"Saggie Baggies"

[DamnthatDavid]

I like Weird Science.

[Ghost of Fraiser]

The show or the movie?

Either way, you can't lose I guess?

[kellychaos]

another one falls to materialistic fasion

and eventually ... gravity. :(

I like her spirit of sharing, though. Perhaps I'll see her in a girly show someday. Yaaaaayyyy!

[DemonLlama]

You should get yourself a third nipple... just for extra fun.

[Dixie]

on your back

[Jixby Phillips]

pics plz

[bigtimecow]

pics plz

lmao you perve!!!!1 :(

[DemonLlama]

I'd buy that for a dollar.

[kellychaos]

Let's pick out some stripper tunes for her so that she'll be prepared for the rest of her life ... or cook up a platter of buffalo wings so she can practive carrying them around.

[Jixby Phillips]

can we get a few before pics i mean they don't have to be naked or anything but you know!!!! something tight and sexy!!!! !

[VolCanon]

Why pay thousands for surgery when you could buy the "Super Do-It-Yourself Boobies!" Kit?
For ONLY 80 easy payments of $49.99 we walk you through the incision,
excruciating pain,
the 10 page contract saying you wont sue,
pictures of how ugly and deformed your breasts will be,
and how to use other materials than silicon to save money (such as styrofoam, butter, banana peels, and used toilet paper.

BUY NOW! (Flash 10 times, at epileptic seizure speed)

(Cut to picture of CEO and owner Eh-Nall Rayp, a stocky, pasty 40 year old "man". He has very large, gangrenous breast implants.)

(Advertisement time: Probably condoms, porn, Michael Jackson, or the "Do you want to be the next Bubblyhard Pumper, famed pornstar" contest. Thats what you get for watching TV at 3 AM)

(Slow sweep across rumbling beach. The sun is setting. Tall model man walks down beach with dumpy flat-chested woman. They walk behind some bushes and start groping. The man then seems disappointed)

"I was really worried about my girlfriend. She just didnt have anything for me to grab and squeeze. I mean, except her ass, but I think she doesnt wash very well down there. So my good friend Eh-Nall Rayp ...

(Flash picture of Mr. Rayp ten times. Then, flash picture of the Super Do-It-Yourself Boobies!" Kit with a blue "BUY NOW!" picture written in old Goth calligraphy.)

... recommended the Super Do-It-Yourself Boobies!" Kit...

(Flash the same "BUY NOW!" picture)

... I thought it was a really good idea. I decided to give her some breasts for a gift. So I went and bought some Rohypnol so she could relax. It was really interesting reading how I could use Butter or garden clippings instead of silicon!...

(Voiceover: Young female voice)
"Yes indeed. You can use just about anything to increase breast size, including CDs, Knives, Paper, Tape, Garden waste, Kitchen Waste, Jello, Glue, and used toilet paper. Here at Eh-Nall Rayp Love Co. we strive to save YOU money!"

... So I grabbed up all the recently cut grass from my neighbour's lawn. There was some doggy doo in it, but I bet that only increases the fun!

(Show a "before picture" of the woman's breast. Note that "Before is NOT written on the picture.)

The augmentation is done in a few steps. First you cut it open and stuff some of your grass clippings into it.

(man takes a handful of grass and stuffs it into the woman's chest. Then he takes a lighter and burns the incision)

Female Voice: It's best to burn the cuts closed, so you get that authentic "Implant scar" look many pornstars have!

Show tall, buxom woman. She's wearing a white bikini with the words "BUY NOW!" painted on her stomach. She's wearing a white hat with a red hospital cross on it. (She's the Female Voice)

(for the next while that she is talking, the camera often fast-zooms in on her stomach and the "BUY NOW!" picture. Sometimes, it flashes.)

"Nurse": Being the trained professional that I am, I can tell you this procedure is 1% safe! Lets look at his progress!

Here's after two incisions (breast looks horribly bloated below the nipple in two places, much like a bullfrog or some kinds of male apes who inflate their chins. There are two very distinct lumps (the size of a small bowling ball).)

After five (There are five lumps, in all parts of the breast. It looks like a bag of large tennis balls.

And after twenty (the entire screen is filled with the picture of a giant breast. There are 20 grotesque burned wounds, dark purple stretch marks, and fluids oozing.) you're done!

Just repeat for the second breast and you're done! She walks away, very slowly. "BUY NOW!" is written on her butt, one word for each cheek. The camera follows her walking in a circle around the room for about 5 minutes, randomly zooming in and out.

(Cut to advertisements: Isnt it nice an "info-mercial" has ads? It makes it seem like you're watching something more meaningful, like Matrix Reloaded, Police Academy, or Full House. This time It's an ad for Budweiseer Beer, not to be comfused with the more commonly known Beer. This is a cheap knockoff made by Microsoft.)

"BUY NOW!" flashes on the screen at epileptic speed for about ten minutes. Sometimes "ONLY 80 EASY PAYMENTS OF $49.99" appear.

Man: "Now look at her! That's something to get a hold of."

The breasts are horribly disfigured, green with gangreene and attracting worms and flies. As we watch, one of the wounds open. Some brown grass falls out. The screen goes fuzzy and there is the color test screen and a lound beep. You cant change the channel.

Man: "Now look at her! That's something to get a hold of".

The breasts are perfectly round and have no scars whatsoever. During the procedure it seems that the woman has had a face change, gotten taller, slimmer, and more muscular. She's now black.

The man is still holding the bloody scalpel.

(Cut to picture of flat chest and picture of the previously shown black woman's breasts. Note the lack of the word before or after, or anything at all resembling that.)

Female voice: "Would you notice the difference? BUY NOW! Once you see this large natural breast, BUY NOW!, wouldnt you want to get your breasts enlarged? BUY NOW!!"

Screen flashes the same "BUY NOW!" screen we are so accustomed to.

Screen cuts to an old taping of "Cheers". There's no reason at all that it is being played, it seems that the video was put onto a reused tape that once had "Cheers" on it. Nothing smacks of professionalism like that.

Cut to crowd. Zoom to Mr. Eynal Rayp. The YMCA music plays.
(Female Voice speaking, there is very little rhythmic similarity with the YMCA song) Buuuuy Buy NOW! Buuuy Buy NOW! buy buy buy, buy buy buy, buy buy buy, now, now, now, now!, and so on.

Screen fades to black. The screen flashes BUY NOW!, then fades to black. This repeats several times.

[Dr. V]

The show or the movie?

Either way, you can't lose I guess?

Don't forget the Oingo Boingo song.

[Supafly345]

I thought this was another idiotic thread about someone's new pet, in this case it was bewbies.

[Two-Faced]

thanks for your support everyone!!!

as i'm in the process of getting fake tits, i'll try to answer all of your inquiries.

1. Yes, I'll let you touch them if I'm drunk, and I may even show them to you, does this make me a slut?

2. I've heard that I might be insecure because of this plastic surgery operation, this makes me homicidal because I hate being psychoanalyzed. It's all that God damned Dr. Phil's fault. The truth is I'm getting breast implants because, hold on to your seats this may be a shocker for some of you, I want bigger tits. I know i know it's a little hard to believe but you just have to trust me on this. If you get the chance, feel free to pass this information on to others.

3. From a 34 b to around a 36 c

Again, thank you for all of your support and keep praying for me a safe and speedy recovery. God bless.

[Cap'n Crunch]

GOD BLESS

[Supafly345]

Didn't she say she already had fake tits? Or was that some misleading practical joke/fantasy? Because if it was, it was very funny.

[Perndog]

I still hope she dies.

[Carnivore]

I demand that pictures be posted of her dying... with her fake boobs exposed.

[ArrowX]

Shes gonna get like Oozing pustules around the incision and then contract tetnis or diptheria then ultimately die after dropping on the ground knocking overa tray of surgical tools landing on her throat

[punkgrrrlie10]

so here comes the question...do you prefer buoyant booby women or aerodynamic/athletic body types

[Mike]

Good luck. Make sure you're getting the kind that don't pop when you squeeze them.

[ArrowX]

so here comes the question...do you prefer buoyant booby women or aerodynamic/athletic body types

I dont care. Its all the same Down there :eek

[Anonymous]

Why don't you just stretch a pancake over a cardboard tube and leave us alone, then?

[kellychaos]

I'd like to see Chojin in a nice B-cup. ;)

[Ri0tGrRrl]

OMG!
y do u want bigger tits? fuck the men! (not literally ha ha) u should be happy with what u have cuz guys like tits no matter what size they r and who cares what they like anyway! they r stupid assholes n they should like u cuz of ur brain not ur tits!

[kellychaos]

somebody's got to mow the lawn. :/

[Jeanette X]

OMG!
y do u want bigger tits? fuck the men! (not literally ha ha) u should be happy with what u have cuz guys like tits no matter what size they r and who cares what they like anyway! they r stupid assholes n they should like u cuz of ur brain not ur tits!

But isn't it her right to do whatever she wants with her body?

If it were say, a nipple piercing, you would probably support her, yet you tell her that she shouldn't get implants because you have preconcieved notions about her motives for getting them. :blah

Talk about your double standards.

[Comrade Rocket]

ive noticed that with a lot of my friends who are "femanists" they don't make good points at all, and instead just say stupid clichés.

And they only care when there around there friends, but when they get around a cute boy there morals and belifes go to shit.

[Supafly345]

Even though the initial premace of implants is "to please men" doesn't neccesarily mean that she can't get them just for herself. Even though we all know it is about her vanity, a lot of people enjoy attention and don't mind increasing it.

[Ri0tGrRrl]

its just fucked up that someone would do something like that for attn. y dont u just do something productive instead of making yrself more objectifyable??

if u have self esteem probs r something like that then maybe u should c a shrink instead. it probably costs less esp. if u have insurance and then u will feel much better in the long run because ppl will like u 4 u instead of 4 yr titties.

[Gurlugon]

K.

[Jeanette X]

its just fucked up that someone would do something like that for attn. y dont u just do something productive instead of making yrself more objectifyable??

if u have self esteem probs r something like that then maybe u should c a shrink instead. it probably costs less esp. if u have insurance and then u will feel much better in the long run because ppl will like u 4 u instead of 4 yr titties.

Don't tell me that people don't get piecings and tattoos for attention. Those are part of the look of a riot grrl, aren't they? Besides, how do you know she isn't getting the implants just for herself? You just assume she is because you are a judgemental person who sees every issue in black and white. It's disgusting how you judge her and tell her what she can and can't do with her body, yet claim to be a feminist. It's her body, she should be able to do whatever the fuck she wants to it without you tell her she's got psychological problems.

And if people objectify her because of them, it's their fault, not hers. It's like saying that a person who was sexually harrassed asked for it because they wore a short skirt to work.

Hypocrites like you make me fucking puke. A fine feminist you are.

[The One and Only...]

Wow. I'm pretty sure that I was expecting Jeanette to say the exact opposite of what she said. Hmm...

Anyway, don't get Pamela Anderson uber-big-boobs. Trust me - it doesn't look good. Could be just me, though.

[Ri0tGrRrl]

its just fucked up that someone would do something like that for attn. y dont u just do something productive instead of making yrself more objectifyable??

if u have self esteem probs r something like that then maybe u should c a shrink instead. it probably costs less esp. if u have insurance and then u will feel much better in the long run because ppl will like u 4 u instead of 4 yr titties.

Don't tell me that people don't get piecings and tattoos for attention. Those are part of the look of a riot grrl, aren't they? Besides, how do you know she isn't getting the implants just for herself? You just assume she is because you are a judgemental person who sees every issue in black and white. It's disgusting how you judge her and tell her what she can and can't do with her body, yet claim to be a feminist. It's her body, she should be able to do whatever the fuck she wants to it without you tell her she's got psychological problems.

And if people objectify her because of them, it's their fault, not hers. It's like saying that a person who was sexually harrassed asked for it because they wore a short skirt to work.

Hypocrites like you make me fucking puke. A fine feminist you are.

whatevs, u r just stupid and have to b right all the time so u keep pickin on me. she can do whatever the fuck she wants she should just think about it first u know. n all of my piercings and tats i have gotten cuz i wanted them 4 me not 4 neone else. a lot of them no one can see neway...cept 4 my girlie *giggle* ;)

i don't see y neone would want implants "just 4 herself" unless she had some major issues. having big tits sucks anyway, they get in the way and ppl always wanna see them. i guess if she is gonna go do porn or some shit then maybe she wants them 4 that.

let's ask, so y r u gettin fake tits? i know u said cuz u want bigger tits but that's not very specific.

[Big McLargehuge]

DID RONGI GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO GET ON THE INTERNET?

[Schimid]

Anything more than a handful is wasted.

Serious.

[DamnthatDavid]

Again... Weird Science.

[ziggytrix]

One culture's beauty modification is another culture's barbarism... we're a fucked up species. :)

[Jeanette X]

whatevs, u r just stupid and have to b right all the time so u keep pickin on me.

What an intelligent rebuttal. You sure showed me. :blah

I don't see y neone would want implants "just 4 herself" unless she had some major issues.

Like I said, judgemental. Some people think that getting genital piercings indicate that the person has "major issues", but you would be offended if someone told you that.

[Meeg]

OMG!
y do u want bigger tits? fuck the men! (not literally ha ha) u should be happy with what u have cuz guys like tits no matter what size they r and who cares what they like anyway! they r stupid assholes n they should like u cuz of ur brain not ur tits!

Wow... that really spoke to me. :goth
If I could understand what you were attempting to say, I'm sure it would be excellent! Honestly does it hurt to type a few extra letters?!? Fucking lazy if you ask me.
Anyway, who's to say if someone is only going to like her for her boobs? If they make her happy, isn't that what matters?

[kellychaos]

I'm getting a fake third testicle.

[Supafly345]

I don't know guys, I am starting to believe that riotgirl is the formost expert on the psychological enigmas that plague our minds' decisions.

[DamnthatDavid]

WH4+Ch4 +4lK1n9 4b0UT 5up@?

[Two-Faced]

To the self righteous feminist dyke:
You need to stop trying to start a revolution of PMSing CEO's cause I tell you what right now, it's making the rest of us look bad.

To everyone else:
THANK YOU I'll keep you in my prayers too!