please help

[davyjoneslocker]

anyone have any suggestions as to what i can do with this?


immersed in the frosty waters, the girl's chest and lungs felt as if clenched within an iron fist, and her whole body seemed clothed in ice. unwittingly she allowed herself to drift lifelessly upwards - her face gently breaking the calm surface of the bay - and her tormented lungs took in a shallow, merciful breath. even so, her limbs were reluctant to function, and she began to convulse uncontrollably, flailing and splashing to stay afloat, gripped by the terrifying possibility of sinking back into the murky depths.

[MaskedMonk]

Clearly you must make it into pornography. EXTREME pornography.

[Sam]

no no no no no... not extreme pornography...

make her black out... then have a giant whale swallow her... when she wakes up, she meets the man who lives in the whale...

THEN you can have the extreme pornography

[davyjoneslocker]

no, no, masked monk is right. we'll jump straight to the good stuff. why not have her be too weak to stay afloat, so she sinks back underwater, and floats right by the whale who's got the man inside, and the man has been inside there so long that he now has his very own army of evil robotic octopi, (which became evil and robotic after being swallowed by the whale and subjected to the man's twisted experiments) which he immediately sends to ravage the girl in every orifice simultaneously, filling her and her last few moments alive with (most likely well deserved) excruciating pain, and giving the whale man immense gratification.

[MaskedMonk]

Then he snowboards on a halfpipe that's on fire inside the whale.

[davyjoneslocker]

except the fire melts the snow, and incinerates the man, leaving the octopi in control of the whale, who now has chronic heartburn.

[Sam]

So, the robotic octopi develop a symbiotic relationship with the whale, and in their pain, pilot the whale onto shore outside of the Tumms factory, and raid it in an attempt to kidnap the CEO, and force him to create a giant whale sized Tumms, or else they will show pictures of him performing sex acts on a 5 speed blender.

[MaskedMonk]

So the CEO puts on his Giant Robot Power Suit with triple flaming chainsaws for hands and fights the whale, along with his zombie minions.

[Skulhedface]

Well now this story has everyone except for Bob and Jilly in it. Why not? Throw them in there too.