Story Of Fartin

[kellychaos]

This a novel about a boy's journey of discovery into undeveloped manhood. As we delve deeper into the twisted tale of a childhood filled with laughs, tears and turkey baster abuse ... we begin to understand why the protagonist eventually spiraled down into a life of pedophilia and abuse. We peek around the curtain of family dysfunctionalism and peak in the window at painful visions of his mother's infidelity heretofore only witnessed by Fartin himself ... the Terminix guy? One of the more poignant moments of the novel is when Fartin is in Walmart buying some white tank-top t-shirts. His lucid description of how the moment was so surreal yet, at the same, was a moment of total self-awareness and clarity was just ... well ... zen-like. I recommend this novel highly. I will not be suprised to see it on Oprah's Book List by early fall.

[Matt Harty]

Fuck you.

[FS]

Yeah, fuck you.

[kellychaos]

And ... apparently ... you two. Do you not have an ounce of empathy for a damaged soul? :tear

[FartinMowler]

Puck YOu!! (I'm Canadian) :/

[kellychaos]

Haha! Tell them the wiffle-ball bat story. :lol

[FartinMowler]

What's a wiffle bat? I got a free ping pong table today :) with paddles and free balls.

[kellychaos]

It'll be a hit for all the neighborhood children. :)

[Matt Harty]

Fartin and Kellychaos both have the "when my insult doesn't work, i can act like im friends with the person" mentallity.

[FartinMowler]

I really got a ping pong table for free today :/ I don't consider people to be my friends that keep saying horrible things about me and my family...I don't think it's funny :( http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v68/fartinmowler/DSC00029.jpg

[Krythor]

aw :(

[ArrowX]

Its a ping pong table.....minus the legs. you know how to save your IGA super savers don't you fartin :)

[AChimp]

MOCK WARS FORUM :rolleyes

[Matt Harty]

WHY ARE ALL OF THE TOYS IN THE BASEMENT? :eek

[FartinMowler]

I put as much of it on my trailer today as I could fit and forgot the legs...my customer gave it to me because they are moving. I get all kinds of stuff :)

[ArrowX]

Customers eh? Would that be the man who you whore your youngest out to?

[Jim Duncan - Weather]

WHY ARE ALL OF THE TOYS IN THE BASEMENT? :eek

It puts the lotion on it's skin.

[FartinMowler]

I run my own lawncutting and landscape business...for 7 years now. My average income for a year is $50 000 and I don't have a boss or any annoying co-workers and my customers live within a 10 mile radius so fuck you ArrowX you piece of shit.

[Matt Harty]

IT DOES WHATEVER ITS TOLD

[Jim Duncan - Weather]

Why do you have padded walls in your basement FARTIN? :chatter

[ArrowX]

no thats exposed asbestose.

[FartinMowler]

It's called insulation :aok

[Captain Goodtimes]

YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT KIND OF HELL I CAN BRING YOU

[Jim Duncan - Weather]

So when you throw your family at the walls they don't get bruises on their upper bodies?

[Matt Harty]

The toys are probably for Fartin anyways, the kids are in the box. :rolleyes

[ArrowX]

:lol

I can just picture a grown man riding down the street on a big wheel with a murse :lol

[Esuohlim]

A "murse", you say.

[Alive]

A "murse is a murse, of curse of curse, its a famous faggots bag" (sang to the tune of the old tv show "mr. ed" the horse) it just came to me for some odd reason, i know, pretty bad eh? :/

[Matt Harty]

IT'S GRRRRREAT!!!

[ArrowX]

Murse= Man Purse Like what indiana jones has

[Seven Force]

"Sung to the tune of 'Green Acres'"

San Fransisco is the place for me.
Gay livin' is the life for me.
Asscheecks spreadin' out so far and wide
Keep your women, just give me that ol' man-hide.

New York is where I'd rather stay.
I get arrested beating gays.
I just adore a penthouse jew.
Dah-ling I love you but give me Phil Donahue.

...The whores.
...The stores.
...Fresh dick.
...U-Pick

You are my bitch.
Stratch my ass-itch.
San Fransisco we are there.

[ArrowX]

FArtins avitar is Jammin!

[FartinMowler]

It hurt's my eyes so I might change it... :/ but I am jamming to a drum machine as I type this and drink beer :)

[Matt Harty]

What a waste of a nice guitar.

[FartinMowler]

Fuck you Matt Harty some day I will be famous as Jessica Simpson and you will have a poster on your wall of me and e-mail me asking for my autograph because I use to hate your gut's but you think that there is some kind of connection that we had but it was tainted with your dispicable behaviour... :lol

[Matt Harty]

I'd visit a Marty fanboard, find your address and kill you.

LOL JK FARTIN ARE YOU DRUNK? :lol :lol

[Seven Force]

Don't worry, Matt. You can have mine.

:lol

[FartinMowler]

not drunk enough :/ your still stupid and ugly.

[Matt Harty]

take pics of what youre eating :rolleyes

[Alive]

Sevenforce that was freakin awsesome.... (green acres)

[FartinMowler]

no you ruined any chance of that young man (or old fag).

[Seven Force]

Thanks.

I like making up lyrics to my parent's oldies songs just to irk them. :)

[Terra]

Hey I lowered my cholesterol...

[WaterLilly]

I know someone who sold her fart on ebay. Really, she did.

[Terra]

I'd hate to lick that envelope.

[Seven Force]

You know, I was caught in a shitstorm once. :/

[WaterLilly]

I'd hate to lick that envelope.

I found it! http://www.sinisterher.com/ Scroll to the bottom.

$50 is a lot of money to pay for a fart. I wonder if that included shipping and handling.

[Terra]

If it was a wet fart I'll bet the handling fee tripled.

[kellychaos]

Fartin and Kellychaos both have the "when my insult doesn't work, i can act like im friends with the person" mentallity.

I wasn't trying to "be friends" with him. The wiffle ball bat was bait and was SUPPOSED to lead to toys, then to the basement, then to the children thus completing the Fartin/pedophile motif. It's all very circular, you know. I had an angle and I thought that you, for one, would recognize it. I'm so very disappointed.

[Matt Harty]

kellychaos you are my best friend

[beautyXqueen]

And ... apparently ... you two. Do you not have an ounce of empathy for a damaged soul? :tear No stupid herninge bush!!!!