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View Full Version : What is the most pain you've ever been in?


McMock
Aug 29th, 2004, 01:00 PM
I'm afraid I won't make a good example posting in this thread. The worst pain I've ever been in, not counting the one time my armpit was charred as a baby - I don't consciously remember that, was a cramp in my leg that just would not stop. Eventually it stopped anyway.

Mike
Aug 29th, 2004, 01:06 PM
When I was 7 I was beaten with a spring from a car. The spring had been left out in the sun for a long time and it was hot.

Anonymous
Aug 29th, 2004, 01:18 PM
hahahahahaha

Ftang Ftang Olay OLay
Aug 29th, 2004, 01:21 PM
could a least been a hot brand or sumthing but a spring...

Supafly345
Aug 29th, 2004, 01:36 PM
McMock gives me a cramp in my eyes.

Anonymous
Aug 29th, 2004, 01:51 PM
I'm just living vicariously through his assailant. He must be a pretty cool guy to beat up a jackass with a huge, red-hot comical spring. Since that's what I'm going to assume a 'car spring' is.

St8ic
Aug 29th, 2004, 01:53 PM
I had a fractured leg and dislocated knee, and I walked on it for two days before I went to the hospital. :/

Fortunatly, Canada has free health care. Take that.

Mike
Aug 29th, 2004, 02:17 PM
Assumption is the loudest speaker of ignorance.

Anonymous
Aug 29th, 2004, 02:22 PM
Mike is the best getter of jokes.

Geggy
Aug 29th, 2004, 02:49 PM
lets beat mike with every car parts there is, i'll start with a muffler then the carborator

breaking my collarbone in two places after falling off my bike while attempting a tail whip...the pain was H E L L. internal bleeding in my left lungs after i slipped and fell off a trampoline while landing on a 30 or so foot jump. so many more injuries i'm amazed i'm even still walking...

ArrowX
Aug 29th, 2004, 02:50 PM
When my cat went insane ant tryed to kill me :( 38 stitches

Little fucker almost slit my carotid artery :lol

executioneer
Aug 29th, 2004, 02:53 PM
one time i went to help a little kid get his ball out of what i thought was just a small patch of himalayan blackberry vines but it was actually growing on the side of a really steep hill, and i slid down the hill thru the vines until i was snagged well enough to stop moving :( it hurt so much that i puked :(

AChimp
Aug 29th, 2004, 02:56 PM
After you dislocate your knee or tear the ACL once, it never really hurts as much as the first time. Your leg goes more numb than anything, and it feels like it's going to bend in the opposite direction if you even move it slightly. :(

Mr. Vagiclean
Aug 29th, 2004, 03:00 PM
:x

the_dudefather
Aug 29th, 2004, 03:05 PM
the only recent bout of pain was on the way to see kill bill vol 1 in the cinema, i trip on a precarious path and busted my ankle, and after the film it was horribly swollen and painful. whats worse is i attempted to attempt the 15 minute walk home. i went 5 mins then got a taxi.

Uma therman was mocking me with the whole wiggle your big toe scene lol

da blob
Aug 29th, 2004, 03:33 PM
I once kept my contact lenses overnight (more than 24 h all in all) and got an eye ulcer it hurt so much I couldn't walk my mother had to ask for a wheelchair at the hospital.
Also a kidney infection - it was a mild one, but still. The full blown kidney thing is a killer, my brother in law had a calculus once and when the pain kicked in it was so overwhelming he had a seizure on the spot. It's like the brain disconnects itself because it can't handle the pain, said the doctors.

Pub Lover
Aug 29th, 2004, 04:01 PM
I once fractured my spine. It didn't start hurting till I woke up four hours later in a police cell.

ziggytrix
Aug 29th, 2004, 04:56 PM
kidney stone. >:

hurt so bad i threw up. and i never thow up cuz i hate to. so i hurt like something was boring it's way thru my guts and my mouth tasted like half digested beef stew. i thought maybe it was my appendix, so i had to go to the goddamn emergency room where they asked me how bad my pain was on a scale from 1 to 10. i told them 7, cuz i figured 3rd degree burns over 85% of you body would be the benchmark for 10. but then they made me sit in the waiting room for hours, then another private waiting room for hours, during which time i had to go to the bathroom and heave up the rest of my stomach's contents, then a few dry heaves.

and that was the best halloween ever.

Ftang Ftang Olay OLay
Aug 29th, 2004, 05:10 PM
catching myself in my zipper was pretty nasty :(

but the worse was when i fell about 15ft and landed on my back on a kerb stone

i broke my back, most of my ribs and punctured a lung all i remember was not being able to breath proper then waking up in hospital.

but i can still walk after that.

Zbu Manowar
Aug 29th, 2004, 05:43 PM
Infected root in my molar. I had to have two more shots in my tooth just to get me from ripping the armrests of the dentist's chair. Later when I got another infected root I went to another dentist and didn't feel a fucking thing.

ThisIsWitty
Aug 29th, 2004, 07:14 PM
I slammed my hand in a door, the pain made my legs go weak, while my hand is still in the door I collapse on the curb and smack my face in the road. Then somone opens the door, and that hurt more.

executioneer
Aug 29th, 2004, 08:06 PM
ISTN THIS A FUN THREAD :x

Matt Harty
Aug 29th, 2004, 08:12 PM
READING THIS THREAD

ArrowX
Aug 29th, 2004, 08:15 PM
Another time in forestry class I was carving and the fagot kid next to me got the smatr Idea to kick the Piece of wood i was cutting. It caused me to carve almost all the skin off of my right thumb and the blade stopped near the cuticle :O

I've also ingested battery acid, small amounts of turpentine, gasoline, liquid plastic, motor oil, and Lead paint.

And people wonder why I'm stupid.

Matt Harty
Aug 29th, 2004, 08:16 PM
NO FIGURED YOU ATE PAINT CHIPS

DeadKennedys
Aug 29th, 2004, 08:19 PM
Another time in forestry class I was carving and the fagot kid next to me got the smatr Idea to kick the Piece of wood i was cutting. It caused me to carve almost all the skin off of my right thumb and the blade stopped near the cuticle :O

I've also ingested battery acid, small amounts of turpentine, gasoline, liquid plastic, motor oil, and Lead paint.

And people wonder why I'm stupid.

Should I laugh or cry?

For me, kidney stones and wisdom teeth.

ArrowX
Aug 29th, 2004, 08:20 PM
pussy my wosdom teeth don't need to be pulled. Just sanded down every 3 weeks

McClain
Aug 29th, 2004, 09:17 PM
During a scrimmage in high school I got tackled and slammed on my tailbone. Any movement whatsoever was excruciating.

or

The gas chamber in boot camp. That was a friggin' nightmare. I laugh about it now and say, "I could do it again!" but it sucked reall bad.

or

Playing basketball and I had a fast break layup. On the way down from the shot some asswipe decided to stand underneath. All of my weight went down on my ankle which landed on his foot and rolled to what seemed like a 90 degree angle. I had so many little chipped, broken and fractured bones. It was horrible.

Captain Goodtimes
Aug 29th, 2004, 09:36 PM
Well when i was 15 i wanted to smell sexy for the ladies and got some colonge on my testicles and I burned then to hell. :)

CastroMotorOil
Aug 29th, 2004, 09:40 PM
where is les waste with his dental horror stories :(

DeadKennedys
Aug 29th, 2004, 10:06 PM
pussy my wosdom teeth don't need to be pulled. Just sanded down every 3 weeks

I believe that would make you the pussy.

Terra
Aug 29th, 2004, 10:18 PM
My anesthesia wore off in the middle of an appendectomy. I don't remember much of it as they said I probably have some mild form of amnesia but to this day I can't watch the last act (where they eviscerate Mel Gibson) of Braveheart.

Father §p@z
Aug 30th, 2004, 03:59 AM
The most pain I have ever been in was in a REALLY bad fire, the smoke made me dizzy, and being the stupid person that I am, I forgot to bring an oxygen tank. Well, I fell straight into a burning chair, and boy howdy did THAT wake me up! I suffered a small third degree burn and couldn't move for the next month. Anyone who has ever been burned really badly, that is a cakewalk compared to third degree burns. Yeesh!

McClain
Aug 30th, 2004, 08:27 AM
Actually, 2nd degree burns are the most painful. 3rd degree is when you burn the nerves. So either you didn't have 3rd degree or you're lying your ass off.

Father §p@z
Aug 30th, 2004, 03:41 PM
Have you ever HAD a third degree burn McClain?

McClain
Aug 30th, 2004, 06:53 PM
Only on my genitals.

Terra
Aug 30th, 2004, 10:42 PM
As I understand it, the only treatment for that is oral.

Sethomas
Aug 30th, 2004, 10:51 PM
Well, what happens is you get a 3rd degree on a small area and 2nd degree burns radiate in a large area around it. So, it's like the eye of the storm is the least painful.

Father §p@z
Aug 31st, 2004, 03:28 AM
Seth's right. But most of the time I was on morphine, so I didn't really care :hypno

Skulhedface
Aug 31st, 2004, 03:30 AM
I don't know if it counts as painful, but it sure was excruciating, and I think psychological pain counts...

When I was 8, we went to Galveston Beach and were in the water on an inflatable raft. I fell out and couldn't find my way up too quickly but when I did I came up and got stuck under the raft for about two minutes. Not being able to breathe at all for two minutes was very painful.

Ftang Ftang Olay OLay
Aug 31st, 2004, 03:35 AM
morphine is great they give you some and then after your like

GIVE ME SOME MORE!!!!!!

Sacks
Aug 31st, 2004, 04:22 AM
This one time I was helping my friend take out his garbage, and in his part of town they have these huge paper bags to put your trash in so they're open at the top, it's really weird. Anyway, so I'm taking out the trash right, and the bag falls, so I reach for it and apparently the night before his older sister had a big party or something because there were all these broken beer bottles at the top of the bag :(. So, one of the beer bottles goes halfway through my right ring finger, and my brain was like "OH man, OOH MAN" and then I start staggaring around bleeding everywhere, and then at the hospital the guy is "cleaning" it, jamming stuff all around in the hole, it was awful. Now the only thing I can feel in that finger is intense pain. Curse you Mr. Budweiser, CUUURSEE YOUUU!

Bod
Aug 31st, 2004, 06:02 AM
Arterial blood test, agonising. And they don't usually get the artery on first go, so you have to re-suffer about 3 times.

At the time I was unable to breathe with oxygen mask on my face, so then panic ensued and pain even worse.

Recreate the Virus
Aug 31st, 2004, 09:08 PM
One time, a girl ripped my heart out. It hurts just thinking about it...

King Hadas
Sep 1st, 2004, 12:10 AM
one time I was totally macking on this chick and she kicked me in the nuts and smashed my left testicle three times smaller then my right one and when I was on the floor in terrible pain everyone started laughing at me :(

Sethomas
Sep 1st, 2004, 03:31 AM
I was unconscious when they did my arterial tap, so I didn't really notice any pain from it. I just woke up wondering why I had stigmata. The full day or so after I started regaining consciousness was perpetual agony, but I was too fucked up to really care or even notice the pain.

Another painful episode of my life was the summer after fifth grade when I spent the day in the sun and developed second degree burns over almost my entire back. The kicker was when my aunt convinced me a few days later that the best thing for it would be a cold shower. Merciful Christ, that was not fun.

McClain
Sep 1st, 2004, 09:33 AM
My brother got a severe sunburn when we were kids. The next day he was covered in blisters but my dad still made him deliver the papers for his route. He had to put that newspaper carrier bag over his head and on his shoulders. I remember him wincing in pain for the entire trip. I offered to take some of the papers out so it wasn't as heavy.
I wonder why we didn't use a wagon? Or why I just didn't do it for him? God, I'm an asshole.

davinxtk
Sep 2nd, 2004, 09:59 PM
Ingrown toenail removal surgery.

I had a pretty advanced infection and my big toe was swollen to about twice its normal size. It was bright red and extremely sensitive to pressure.
The toenail has grown long, and on either side the forward corners of it are tucked well under tender, infected flesh.
What the podiatrist does is take an incredibly sharp pair of scissors and shove it straight under the toenail, along the side. Snip. Further, deeper than it can be seen past the root of the nail. Snip. Including flesh.
Repeat the same for the other side.
Visualize the toenail now cut into three pieces. There's a strip down the middle that is still perfectly attached, the only part of the nail that's going to stay. On either side of that, there's a weak, soft piece of nail completely detached from its root and the skin beneath it, but held in place by the infection.
Tweezers grip one of the pieces, and pull out out at an angle so it doesn't break. Same with the other one. Blood gushes.
Electric cauterization of the blood vessels inside the toenail.
Cotton swab on a wooden stick, covered in some jelly antibiotic acid. One shoved into each gaping hole left by the pieces of nail.
Bandaged, and wrapped.


The first three times I had this done (ages 7, 9 and 10) I didn't have any kind of anesthesia. The fourth and fifth, I had weak local anesthesia. The last time I had it done, there was so much swelling that the anesthesia couldn't even get to the nerves. A rubber band around the base of the toe didn't cut off the cicrculation enough to numb it, not for an instant.

That was three years ago. I'm so glad I haven't had once since.
My toes started hurting while I was typing this.

DeadKennedys
Sep 2nd, 2004, 10:11 PM
Is that why you always look so damn mopey?

davinxtk
Sep 2nd, 2004, 10:51 PM
No, actually, that has more to do with my general distaste for humans.


http://24.60.240.39/mrh/0901.jpg


Is that better?

da blob
Sep 2nd, 2004, 11:50 PM
in a faggish way, maybe.

FartinMowler
Sep 3rd, 2004, 12:10 AM
I called it Frankenfinger :( I got exhausted going up and down a ladder with my hedge trimmer on a very hot day. I set my idle so it would shut off when I released the trigger but it ran on for a second and caught my finger. My customer came home and took me to the hospital. That was the longest I ever didn't play my bass. http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v68/fartinmowler/frankenfinger.jpg

Father §p@z
Sep 3rd, 2004, 02:40 AM
Holy SHIT :(

Jixby Phillips
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:09 AM
what a coincidence, thats how I describe YOU :eek

Jixby Phillips
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:09 AM
get it, because you have like a preist schtick on these boards, and you're also a peice of shit!

Father §p@z
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:10 AM
Stop following me, you troubled individual!

Jixby Phillips
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:10 AM
lol do you get it???

Father §p@z
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:24 AM
Yes, I get it. I am a priest, hence the holy part, and you think I am a pile of shit. Holy shit. BRILLIANT WATSON. SO FUNNY I FORGOT TO LAUGH >:

Deer Berry
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:29 AM
OH NOW I GET IT!

mubert
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:41 AM
I was running, and I accidentally knocked into a girl with steel wire glasses. They shattered into my forehead, and the wire ripped out part of my eyebrow. FUCKING AWESOME!

Father §p@z
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:43 AM
COOL :lol

mubert
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:50 AM
:lol :fu

Father §p@z
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:52 AM
:( Sorry for laughing at your pain. But that's basically what this thread is for :(

davinxtk
Sep 3rd, 2004, 05:03 AM
in a faggish way, maybe.


Sure, jump right in, baby.

http://24.60.240.39/i-mock/butt.jpg


I love y'all.

Father §p@z
Sep 3rd, 2004, 05:04 AM
>: I did NOT need to see that >:

davinxtk
Sep 3rd, 2004, 05:05 AM
NOTE TO SELF


ALCOHOL + INTERNET = FUCKING STUPID IDEA

Father §p@z
Sep 3rd, 2004, 05:10 AM
It depends. With tequilla, a person is to friggen drunk to type, and it comes out like this: wkjefgoiqwebhaglhudfihghqf
But with Cinnimon Schnapps, you get a half-assed asshole, like me.
With beer, you are too cool for the internet, as you are most likely at a raving frat party, puking out the windows. I have yet to experiment with all of the different liquors, but I'll keep you all posted :)

davinxtk
Sep 3rd, 2004, 05:21 AM
This is Jagermeister, which I ran out of, and rum to fill in the gap afterwards.

Father §p@z
Sep 3rd, 2004, 05:23 AM
Ok, I'll remember to stay away from Jagermeister and unspiced rum (CAPTAIN MORGANS KICKS ASS >:) I'm sure nobody wants to see a pic of my ass.

DeadKennedys
Sep 3rd, 2004, 07:13 AM
It depends. With tequilla, a person is to friggen drunk to type, and it comes out like this: wkjefgoiqwebhaglhudfihghqf
But with Cinnimon Schnapps, you get a half-assed asshole, like me.
With beer, you are too cool for the internet, as you are most likely at a raving frat party, puking out the windows. I have yet to experiment with all of the different liquors, but I'll keep you all posted :)

You don't drink. It's obvious.

Anonymous
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:44 PM
Did davin finally get around to posting a schlong picture? ;<

ArrowX
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:45 PM
Once in grade 6 some kid nailed me in the leg with a Razor Scooter and it tore a huge chunk of bone out of my goddamn leg.
I would show the scar but it looks too pussyish no because my parents made me soak in peroxide and used this shit that makes scars less pominent :(

FS
Sep 3rd, 2004, 04:46 PM
Did davin finally get around to posting a schlong picture? ;<

I didn't see it myself but I'm pretty sure it was just a butt.

And if past experience tells us anything, it was badly lit and looking depressed.

FartinMowler
Sep 3rd, 2004, 05:08 PM
And if past experience tells us anything, it was badly lit and looking depressed.


:picklehat

nothing4buddha
Sep 3rd, 2004, 05:08 PM
:lol

Mr. Vagiclean
Sep 3rd, 2004, 05:17 PM
oh drummin almost all your replies are so CUTE i juwST WANT TO FUCK THAT ASS

nothing4buddha
Sep 3rd, 2004, 05:19 PM
OH NO YOU DI'INT :snapfingers

the[Hitman]
Sep 3rd, 2004, 05:36 PM
Jager is great.
Tastes way too much like toothpaste.
Don't do more than a few shots of it either.


Don't mix jager, fireball, polar ice, crown, blue liquer, jd and no name brand cola.



Oh, and don't do a boilermaker if you cant chug beer.



Anyways, most pain has to be when I got a 4 foot stick through my right calf.

davinxtk
Sep 4th, 2004, 04:34 AM
Did davin finally get around to posting a schlong picture? ;<

I didn't see it myself but I'm pretty sure it was just a butt.

And if past experience tells us anything, it was badly lit and looking depressed.


Yeah, it was just my ass. And while your comment actually made me laugh rather loudly, it was lit well enough to show how completely pasty and Irish I really am.

And it's actually a perky butt for a skinny white boy.

Terra
Sep 4th, 2004, 08:10 PM
Please post said "perky butt." As the rest of the goods are above average, it would be most appreciated by one of your fan club.

THNX!!

davinxtk
Sep 4th, 2004, 09:27 PM
Any time.




But you're buying the booze.

Terra
Sep 5th, 2004, 09:53 PM
Where do I send the money??

davinxtk
Sep 5th, 2004, 10:19 PM
You're missing the point, babe.

http://24.60.240.39/i-mock/license.jpg

Terra
Sep 6th, 2004, 11:48 AM
:confused

You don't have people there that can buy your stuff for you?? I remember you posting something about your birthday party and you got shitfaced. I didn't think it was off of Koolaid but I could be wrong.

So I don't think I missed the point. I just wanted to know where to send the money.

davinxtk
Sep 6th, 2004, 12:30 PM
I was trying to pull an age joke, it usually gets pulled for me around here. I didn't realize you were just as young as I am.

Next time I happen to be absolutely shitfaced and the last person awake at a party, I'll make it up to you.

Terra
Sep 6th, 2004, 12:53 PM
And where do I send the money? :brokenrecord

:)

Jixby Phillips
Sep 6th, 2004, 04:34 PM
SHUT UP!!!!!

Terra
Sep 6th, 2004, 05:34 PM
NOOO

DeadKennedys
Sep 6th, 2004, 08:35 PM
My friend and I were running through a pasture away from a crazy horse trying to trample us, and I got clotheslined by some barbed wire.

mubert
Sep 7th, 2004, 05:16 AM
Dont you mean "decapitated", or at least "badly wounded"?

The One and Only...
Sep 7th, 2004, 04:12 PM
Pain? Probably when I was horribly constipated. When I did shit, it hurt like fucking hell. I thought I was going puke all over the floor, but I managed to keep it in.

Afterwards, I had to crap almost immediately after I ate a big meal for a month.

FartinMowler
Sep 7th, 2004, 04:34 PM
AOA told a story about himself being full of shit :/

ernasty10050
Sep 7th, 2004, 04:38 PM
when i woke up, my leg hurt

ThisIsWitty
Sep 7th, 2004, 04:49 PM
CHARLIE HORSE OMG OMG KILL ME PLEASE

camacazio
Sep 7th, 2004, 06:11 PM
omg stop posting

the[Hitman]
Sep 7th, 2004, 08:28 PM
terra needs to calm down over davin.

i'm already tired of her shit and i only read this shit once every couple days.




dear terra,


you have a nice rack but that doesn't connotate being a female stalker.


love,

the[Hitman]

Terra
Sep 7th, 2004, 08:42 PM
Dear Hitman,

Seeing as how this thread concerns pain, I'm sure that hammer embedded up your ass must be uncomfortable. Perhaps if you remove it and just move along, you'll be much happier in the long run. If not, rotating on said hammer just might take your mind off of my posts.

I love you!

Terra

PS Thank you for the naked pictures of you and the sheep. I declare the shocked look on that one sheep is a keeper!

mubert
Sep 7th, 2004, 08:44 PM
*pst* HITMAN IO THINK SHE LIKES YOU *pst*

the[Hitman]
Sep 7th, 2004, 09:23 PM
Woohoo!

I always loved the mentally of people who use "things in the ass" as an insult.

Please go back to grade 5 when people thought it was creative.