The Official confession thread

[Father §p@z]

Yes, confession. As in confessing your sins. You know, that thing you NEVER do? Yeah. Well, this thread is meant for that. I will pray for forgivness from god to you, and offer my humble opinion, no matter if you're sin is real or fake.

[Jixby Phillips]

I must confess you are a cunt.

[Father §p@z]

:rolleyes I thought someone might say that.

[Jixby Phillips]

why dont you make a confession about it

[McMock]

Oh, I see what you're doing. You're being a priest... hadn't picked up on that yet.

I have a whole lot of pent up shit in my body right now. I'm not even sure what it is, but I feel my shoulders are as tense as they can be. It's like a tickling, shivering sensation. I know that I could break a whole lot of boundaries I don't want to break right now, if I were to do something.

I must try not to get angry, because I'm so numb, emotionally, that I'd not notice I'm hurting people until I'd done substantial damage.

Can you ask Jesus for a bless or a cure minor wounds please?
k thx bye.

[Father §p@z]

Sure thing.
And yes, my online theme is a priest. I'm seriously training to become one too. After college, It's a few boring years of grad school, then I have to be ordained by the bishop and all that. Snorefest. That's annother reason I post on message boards.

[McMock]

I'm from Europe. Religion is dead, buried, has been dug up, has been pissed on, dug back up, shat on, has been turned into a zombie, has been sent back in time and has been made to chew baby jesus brains out in a cold, lonely bethlehem night over here.

As such, I have a certain... I don't know... difficulty understanding places where religion is prevalent. This is the premise. I don't mean anything by this - only to sketch where I'm coming from.

Now, being from where I'm coming from, I have a bit of trouble understanding why somebody would become a priest. I respect your choice, because it is a hard decision to make. To me, this is as incomprehensible as somebody wanting to become a kamikaze pilot, though. What is it that has made you decide you want to be a priest?

[Father §p@z]

I don't know really. My mom is a jesus freak, so I was at church a lot when I was a kid. I knew the priest there, and he was so cool, or at least it seemed that way. Anyway, I thought "I want to be just like him when I grow up" and here I am. Hmm... Mabye I should think this over... Nah, I'm too lazy. Besides, it would make my mom happy :)

Oh and I'm NOT a momma's boy if anyone was thinking that :)

[McMock]

Well, I actually would advise you to think this through. And not because I think you should change your mind, but because I think if you're going to be a priest, you need to have thought it through very well.

A priest without a calling, well... I don't think that even works. So think it through, and make sure that you know whether or not you want it. But whatever you do, make sure you're 100% dedicated.

Ah, and here is a disclaimer: If you did not care about my opinion, you shouldn't have read the preceeding text.

[Father §p@z]

:rolleyes Well I KNOW that. And my calling is to help spread the word of god in these troubled times.

[Ftang Ftang Olay OLay]

will you be doing sports' funeral cause you wanna be a priest

[Father §p@z]

Who?

[Ftang Ftang Olay OLay]

:lol your lucky u don't know him.

i burn witches is that bad???

[Father §p@z]

No, Burn the devil's pawns to you're hearts content!

[Ftang Ftang Olay OLay]

i will thnx and the feds can't do me for murder cause god says i can

[McMock]

Allright then.

If you believe in it, then that's all it takes. I have a more pragmatic approach to salvation, I'm afraid. I think people are born really good, and become more and more evil the longer they live on this planet. I don't think salvation is possible. You can't become a better person than you were before.

My sin is pride, conceitedness, and a sadistic tendency. Forgive me, father, for I have sinned.

[Father §p@z]

:troutslap All is forgiven.

[Jixby Phillips]

*kills self*

*is dead*

[FS]

When a whole bunch of people with no pictures or broken links post, you really start to notice you don't care what they say.

[McMock]

I have a question, father. I don't really care much about the answer. I can definately live without it. But I'll just ask it anyway.

Is Life a quantifiable force?

If so, is it more of a sin to kill a big, fat person than it is to kill a dwarf? And if not, how come the general concensus is that killing a fly is far less of a sin, if at all, than to kill your neighbour?

Is there such a thing as five billion units of life left in a person? Is this life the soul? If so, does a fly also have a (really small) soul?

[Father §p@z]

Yes, and killing a midget or a fat guy is the same.

[dead_pigeon]

What if the midget is a satanic high priest or whatever and the fat guy is a missionary with glandular problems?

[Father §p@z]

:rolleyes If you're not gonna confess, then don't post here >:

[Burger Lord]

where I come from priests are hanged for their evil non-protestant voodo magic, then we flog them with rebel flags and bud light bottles to scare the devils away and purify the land from demon loving once more.

we do the same thing to minorities too...

[Father §p@z]

Thats a Georgia trailer park for ya!

[DeadKennedys]

Here. (www.grouphug.us)[/url]

[executioneer]

i confess that anime is for fags

[Gabe Vieira]

I agree. Especially those who wack off to it, that's just fucking sick.

[DeadKennedys]

Here. (www.grouphug.us)

[Father §p@z]

Me: God, Forgive me, for I have sinned. I have thought about wasting Jixby's vulgar ass then eating him to gain his courage.
GOD: Eat away, corky.

[DeadKennedys]

Well, if you're incapable of kicking someone's ass, I suppose it's not a sin to think about it.

[liquidstatik]

MY CHICK ON THE SIDE SAY SHE GOT ONE ON THE WAY

[Perndog]

He's really training to be a priest, which means feels a sacred calling to devote his life to God.

Yet he thinks the education is boring.

If I were God, I'd kick a guy's ass for something like that.

[slavemason]

I don't really have liver spots.

[kellychaos]

Is it time for the pedophilia jokes yet?

[FartinMowler]

Kelly Chaos at work...


Boss "Kelly we've had some complaints about you"

Kelly "Is it time for the pedophile jokes yet?"

[kellychaos]

Impeccable timing! I'm beginning to think this Fartin-pedophilia connection in this forum is more than mere coincidence. It's like a psychic bond.

[sports]

I have a confession...I was a big Power Rangers fan...Mighty Morphin, the 1st movie, Zeo, In Space. And from time to time...I watch the newer crap...and well...it really sucks.

[FS]

Jeez mr. Sports, aren't you kind of old for that sorta stuff?

[sports]

I just wish they cancel the show but before they do, put it in the hands of the die-hard loyal fans...i know with today's technology, you can make a better tv show. Look at farscape...or even..mutant x..andromada is a good example. Doesn't look to cheap..but you also need the story and acting aswell.

[Father §p@z]

You outta go to hell right now you Mighty Morphin' fuck! Luckily god is in a good mood today, and since you already seem to be dead, you're off the hook.

[sports]

:fu. Early rangers rocked, the crap called turbo sucked and post ''in space'' has sucked.

[executioneer]

i'm sorry but they have always sucked for ever

[mubert]

I must confess, that one time, I pissed in the holy water, and Father Sp@z blessed himself in it for a couple of weeks, and I also nuck in vomit to his sandwich, and watched him eat it...Oh, and one time, Father Sp@z was walking his dog, and I took a dump, and told a police officer that his dog took it, and he got fined like 100 bucks.

[liquidstatik]

There's this girl.. and she's like 13 and I find her very attractive. :(

[whoreable]

I must confess I want you to walk on hot coals like the freak at the fair

[liquidstatik]

YOU DONT HAVE TO BE MEAN >:

[Father §p@z]

I must confess, that one time, I pissed in the holy water, and Father Sp@z blessed himself in it for a couple of weeks, and I also nuck in vomit to his sandwich, and watched him eat it...Oh, and one time, Father Sp@z was walking his dog, and I took a dump, and told a police officer that his dog took it, and he got fined like 100 bucks.
I don't have a dog. AND HOW DARE YOU URINATE IN THE HOLY WATER :(

[Terra]

Dear Father,

I came to the Mockery forum to get laid and be otherwise humiliated for my ignorance. I fear I'm pregnant with a cyberbaby and I don't know who the poster is. I dropped out of online college and I'm now walking the cyber streets of personal purgatory in the hopes of finding a more prospective cyber father that I can blackmail into online marriage before I begin to show. Hopefully his BLOG will reveal a nice chunk of change in his personal financial portfolio.

On the upside, my pornography site is making millions and many people can identify me by my snatch but have no idea who I look like and wouldn't know me if they fucked me with the lights on. I now seek the company of priests such as yourself to give me online benediction and with whom to ride the chariot of passion to online eternity. While I may never be saved, going to hell never felt so good.

[hawaiian mage]

I don't have anything to add to this thread, but right now there are exactl 48 replies to this thread and I don't want to have to click on page 2 later just to read one measly reply so I'll just post instead and save myself the trouble later.

[Father §p@z]

Terra, If you want to go to hell, then don't post in this thread, as I can do you no good. Also, shut-up Hawaiian Mage, Confess or fuck off.

[hawaiian mage]

I confess that I am very happy I didn't have to click on page 2 and wait for it to load just to see you post the most linear and uncreative post ever.

Also, I killed both my parents and then proped them into sexually illicite positions and sold the pictures on the internet as bizarr S&M porn. I didn't do it for the money either, that was just a perk.

Can you forgive me?

[Terra]

Terra, If you want to go to hell, then don't post in this thread, as I can do you no good.

Doood.

You wanted confessions. I gave you one.

The one I gave on "Drunk Bitch Friday" at Hooters was waaaaay substandard.

[Father §p@z]

I confess that I am very happy I didn't have to click on page 2 and wait for it to load just to see you post the most linear and uncreative post ever.

Also, I killed both my parents and then proped them into sexually illicite positions and sold the pictures on the internet as bizarr S&M porn. I didn't do it for the money either, that was just a perk.

Can you forgive me?

No, because I hate you. Now please go ram a broomstick up your ass, and if you are unable to, have someone assist you.

[hawaiian mage]

A broom STICK? Geeze, I could stuff a BROOM up my ass it's so loose from constant sodomizing.

[MLE]

:lol

[Father §p@z]

:lol I don't hate you as much now :lol

[mubert]

Are MY sins forgiven? I dont care if Hawaiian Mage rots in hell, Terra is ok, I GUESS, but it's all about Mubert.

[Father §p@z]

Wait, what were your sins again?

[mubert]

I dont feel like confessing all 200,000+ of them, just say that they are forgiven.

[Father §p@z]

You get nothing until you confess at least two.

[Terra]

He's the best customer on my porn site and he's underage. There's two. Now forgive the SOB so he can go back and pour more money into my site and sodomize me.

Thnx!

[Jixby Phillips]

you guys are TWIST ED :eek

[ArrowX]

God I hate father spaz hes wors than sports or bubsy even

[mubert]

You get nothing until you confess at least two.

Ok. I called a priest a faggot to his face, and I looked lustfully at like 100,000 diffrent women.

[Dole]

Thats a lot of web pages.

[mubert]

:lol

[Father §p@z]

I do both of thos things, they aren't sins. Those other faggot priests, think they're so damn cool >:

[ThisIsWitty]

Is it still against the law if both people are under 18...even if one is only 6?

Well, in this case is it still a sin?

[mubert]

Its against the law anyways. It's just that neither party can be held responsible for their actions, cause both arent old enough to give consent. So, neither is charged.

[Terra]

Yes. It is against the law even if both ages together add up to a number below 18.

[mubert]

I beat you to it!!! HAH.

[EisigerBiskuit]

I confess that, spending a week in Georgia, Florida sucks ass.

[Anonymous]

Fuck. I thought you were caught in the explosion that claimed sports' life.

[hawaiian mage]

Fuck. 73 replies.

Hell if I'm going to click on page three again just to read one post. Sucks to that, man!

[mubert]

yeah, nobody would get within a close enough range of sports relative to that of that explosion. period.

[Father §p@z]

Get out of my thread Mr mage. Go molest your dog or something.

[Jixby Phillips]

yeah go have some sex with an animal :lol

[Terra]

Jixby's available for this.

[mubert]

Terra, remember about that one rule, about you know, following a member and continually pestering him/her? Like Helm's ass did to me?

[ThisIsWitty]

BUT IS IT A SIN?

[mubert]

no. Jixby does suck :lol

[ThisIsWitty]

STOP IT YOU FUCK

[mubert]

:( WERNT WE BUDDIES!!!?!?!?

[Jixby Phillips]

today i had some sex with a kitten untill it died and then i prayed for forgiveness and cried myself to sleep

[Jixby Phillips]

PS i pretended i was fucking terras vagina the whole time

[Jixby Phillips]

dismembered vagina

[Jixby Phillips]

just kidding that'd be gross

[mubert]

And with his string of moronic, yet sort of funny posts, the one and only Jixby Phillips reached 5000 posts.

[Jixby Phillips]

oh my gosth too much information lol

[EisigerBiskuit]

:( WERNT WE BUDDIES!!!?!?!?
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v87/Eisiger/ummhmm.jpg
hmm, that says it

[Evil Robot]

I shot both JR and Mr Burns.

[Jixby Phillips]

Mubert, please start a topic asking for the best way to carve a jack-o-lantern, I have a really funny reply where i say okay first you write a letter to your family and then you put a knife in your neck and then you [list][list=][img][/img][url][center]MOTHER FUCKERS GO BEEP BEEP BEEP [/center][/url][/list][/list]

[ThisIsWitty]

:( WERNT WE BUDDIES!!!?!?!?
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v87/Eisiger/ummhmm.jpg
hmm, that says it


You could at least put the right screen name you untalented pile of shitbricks.

[EisigerBiskuit]

sorry, I forgot "1", write me a fucking letter wasting all of our time :wah

[Evil Robot]

Earn a degree in 3 years in most cases, the ad says. In your case it will take 7.

[mubert]

my sn is mubert9, not mubert 9, nor is it mubert981.

[ThisIsWitty]

Do you often find yourself IMing the wrong screen name when you're in the mood to talk?

[Evil Robot]

That reminds me of a funny story.
A few years back during the peak sun spot cycle which increased radion range on this planet, I owned a CB radio. Long story short, I met a girl who tried to give me her phone number. Due to the fact that 27.125 mzh (CB channel 14) was occupied by me, and a world full of psychos, she gave me her phone number in the form of an equation. The variables were things we had talked about over a period of two weeks which only we would know 100% of. Needless to say I fucked the math up and wound up having a three hour conversation WITH THE WRONG GIRL. I dialed the wrong number and never knew about it till the next day when she asked over the CB why I never called.

[Jixby Phillips]

Then what happened!

[Anonymous]

Let's see:

Said "fucktard" at least over a thousand times in various forms.

Killed 50 cops.

Made fun of the mentally challenged. (Half of this board)

Been cruel to the emotionally crippled. (The other half)

Ripped the tags off of matresses.

Went out of my way to be an Asshole and cannot feel bad about it.

Had impure thoughts about various female family members.

Acted upon those thoughts at various times.

I feel nothing but contempt and disgust for you all, and if you all had a single neck, I'd like to wrap my hands around it and choke the shit of it until all your faces turned purple and your eyeballs popped out of their fuckin' sockets, AND if you all had a single ass I'd fucking ram a goddamn mop up it repeatedly at the same time I was choking you....

Come to think of it, I don't want absolution, you fucking child molesting, pope blowing fucktard. Your mother sucks cocks in hell Father Spaz!

:lol

[Dole]

and if you all had a single neck, I'd like to wrap my hands around it and choke the shit of it until all your faces turned purple and your eyeballs popped out of their fuckin' sockets,

Was that intentionally a Carl Panzram quote?

[Zero As A Limit]

I confess that I shot Kurt Cobain and I was also on the grassy knoll. Am I forgiven ?

[mubert]

Kurt Cobain = Act of God
JFK = Judgment for all the bitches he had

I'd say that you are thoroughly forgiven.

[ItalianStereotype]

you're what, maybe 10? do you even know who Kurt Cobain and JFK were?

[mubert]

Kobain was the lead singer of the Seattle grunge band "Nirvana". They had a couple of albums including "Nevermind" "In Utero" "Insecticide" and "Bleach" . Kobain died from 2 shotgun blasts to the head, while he was presumably under the influence of crack-cocaine.
He wrote a suicide note, and his body was discovered by his gardener . Many people think Courtney Love is responsible for the murder, but the case was left unsolved, and his death was declared a suicide.

JFK was the president during the '60s, a crucial time in black history. During a procession, he was presumably shot by a man named "Lee Harvey Oswald". People still speculate about who was in cahoots with him, like the man "Jack Ruby" who had many mob connections, or even the CIA.

Dont think I have the intellect of a teenager just cause I am one.

[ItalianStereotype]

no, I didn't even say you were a teenager. I'm putting you at about 10 years old.

[mubert]

>: I'm 14! IM A BIG MAN. :lol....I'm gonna get mocked soooooo big for posting this. DARE I PRESS THE "SUBMIT" BUTTON?!

[EisigerBiskuit]

Oh great, he pressed it

[Ftang Ftang Olay OLay]

WHOA!!! A WHOLE 14 :eek

i remember being that age like 7 years ago

[Jixby Phillips]

Kobain was the lead singer of the Seattle grunge band "Nirvana".

lol

shit if you were 14 you were like 4 when Kobain killed himself. That is depressing.

[nothing4buddha]

:lol

[MetalMilitia]

Kobain was the lead singer of the Seattle grunge band "Nirvana". They had a couple of albums including "Nevermind" "In Utero" "Insecticide" and "Bleach" . Kobain died from 2 shotgun blasts to the head, while he was presumably under the influence of crack-cocaine.
He wrote a suicide note, and his body was discovered by his gardener . Many people think Courtney Love is responsible for the murder, but the case was left unsolved, and his death was declared a suicide.

JFK was the president during the '60s, a crucial time in black history. During a procession, he was presumably shot by a man named "Lee Harvey Oswald". People still speculate about who was in cahoots with him, like the man "Jack Ruby" who had many mob connections, or even the CIA.

Dont think I have the intellect of a teenager just cause I am one.

Way to go, you can use google.

[mubert]

My brother was a huge fan of Nirvana, and I had to do a report on the JFK assasination.

[liquidstatik]

This thread sucks, though. :(

[Brandon]

he was presumably shot by a man named "Lee Harvey Oswald". People still speculate about who was in cahoots with him, like the man "Jack Ruby"
Why the hell did you put quotes around their names? It's not like they were using aliases.

[mubert]

Jack Ruby wasnt his real name...

[Brandon]

He had been publicly known as "Jack Ruby" for years.

[LegoLars]

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

[mubert]

He was born under a diffrent one though. WHY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT THIS?!

[Anonymous]

Carl Panzram 1891-1930

Arrested for drunk and disorderly conduct at 8.
Burgalized homes
Burned down his reform school
Burned down churches for fun
Drifted around, assaulted, and robbed people.
Murdered 21 people. :eek
SODOMIZED OVER A THOUSAND BOYS :chatter

Insisted on being hanged for his execution. :hangman

Last words: "Hurry up you bastard, I could hang a dozen men while you're fooling around." :lol

[Zero As A Limit]

you're what, maybe 10? do you even know who Kurt Cobain and JFK were?

I knew who both of them were when I was 10.

[ItalianStereotype]

and it hasn't made you suck any less.

[Zero As A Limit]

and it hasn't made you suck any less.

Not insulting, not witty, but at least it bumped your post count up by one.

[ItalianStereotype]

the "sticks and stones" defense?

[Zero As A Limit]

the "sticks and stones" defense?
Well, I'm not witty, nor am I insulting, so that's my best defense.

[Father §p@z]

Let's see:

Said "fucktard" at least over a thousand times in various forms.

Killed 50 cops.

Made fun of the mentally challenged. (Half of this board)

Been cruel to the emotionally crippled. (The other half)

Ripped the tags off of matresses.

Went out of my way to be an Asshole and cannot feel bad about it.

Had impure thoughts about various female family members.

Acted upon those thoughts at various times.

I feel nothing but contempt and disgust for you all, and if you all had a single neck, I'd like to wrap my hands around it and choke the shit of it until all your faces turned purple and your eyeballs popped out of their fuckin' sockets, AND if you all had a single ass I'd fucking ram a goddamn mop up it repeatedly at the same time I was choking you....

Come to think of it, I don't want absolution, you fucking child molesting, pope blowing fucktard. Your mother sucks cocks in hell Father Spaz!

:lol

What the fuck do I look like, a Catholic?

Also, I need to make a note to all the noobs, If this thread goes under, feel free to gravedig it.

[Anonymous]

'Cause then I can feel free to lock it.

[Father §p@z]

:/ I swear you are the strangest person I have ever known. I never know what you are going to do next.

Also, can someone tell me who that vulgar Mad Max guy is?

[hawaiian mage]

Look at me. I'm posting in this thread.

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

I sure hope this thread doesn't get locked for containing no interesting content! I would hate to see it dissapear forever!

[Anonymous]

I swear you are the strangest person I have ever known. I never know what you are going to do next.

If that's the case then you sure haven't known much, fucktard.

Also, can someone tell me who that vulgar Mad Max guy is?

Vulgar? What the fuck did you expect by posting on this goddamn fucking fucktard board? Your fucking Mommy to put her sweaty pork pie fingers over your goddamn eyes when the "bad words" showed up? If the board is to "rough" for your delicate faggot sensibilities then get the fuck out of here. You and your posts fucking suck shitty dingo balls that have been laying out in the sun being picked apart by vultures with herpes you fucking piece of shit.

:lol

[hawaiian mage]

Hey mad max!

FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME

INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER INANE BANTER

STRINGED TOGETHER CUSS WORDS STRINGED TOGETHER CUSS WORDS STRINGED TOGETHER CUSS WORDS STRINGED TOGETHER CUSS WORDS STRINGED TOGETHER CUSS WORDS STRINGED TOGETHER CUSS WORDS STRINGED TOGETHER CUSS WORDS

RETALITORY COMMENT THAT MAKES THIS ARGUMENT SHOW NO SIGN OF ENDING AND MAKING THIS THREAD REALLY LONG

[Father §p@z]

Max, do you always write a whole freaking paragraph when you insult someone? It doesn't make you look more intelligent, in case you didn't know. It just makes you look like an annoying bastard. Oh, and one more thing, cursing every time you speak is something I would expect from an unfunny, friendless kid in grades 3-6.

[Jixby Phillips]

You must be really stupid if you think Mad Max is trying to look "intellegent."

[Anonymous]

SO LIKE ONE TIME FATHER SPAZ WAS COMING OUT OF HIS SPECIAL ED CLASS WITH HIS SMURF NAZI SNOWSUIT AND LIKE HE HAD SOMETHING WHITE ALL OVER HIS FOREHEAD AND I ASKED HIM WHAT IT WAS AND HE DIDN'T REPLY HE JUST SAID HE HAD TO GET HOME REAL QUICK, BUT THEN LIKE ALL OF A SUDDEN THIS GUY JACK WHO'S LIKE THE SCHOOL YARD BULLY TACKLED SPAZ FROM OUT OF NOWHERE! THEN AFTER HE SLAPPED HIM AROUND A FEW TIMES HE PULLED DOWN HIS PANTS STARTED SHOVING HIS DICK INTO SPAZ'S EYE UNTIL THE EYE WAS CRUSHED UNDER THE WEIGHT OF HIS COCK. AND IT WAS ALL BLOODY AND DISGUSTING. SPAZ WAS PLEADING FOR HIM TO STOP AND CRYING BUT THEN JACK JUST STARTED SKULL FUCKING HIM UNTIL HE PULLED OUT AND JIZZED ALL OVER HIS FACE, THEN JACK'S FRIENDS BILL AND CHET BEGAN BEATING SPAZ ABOUT THE HEAD WITH THEIR NUT SACKS AND THEN FINALLY STARTED ASS FUCKING HIM UNTIL LIKE A FIRE PLUG COULD FIT UP THERE.

I WAS SCARED SO I RAN HOME AND POSTED THE ENTIRE STORY ON I-MOCKERY.

:lol

[Father §p@z]

You must be really stupid if you think Mad Max is trying to look "intellegent."
Don't worry Jixby, after that last post of his, I know Max is anything but intelligent.

[Anonymous]

SO LIKE FATHER SPAZ WAS WEARING A DRESS ONE TIME AND HE WAS WAITING FOR JOHN, WHO'S LIKE HIS ON/OFF BOYFRIEND OR SOMETHING. AND I ASKED SPAZ WHAT WAS GOING ON, AND HE SAID TODAY WAS THE DAY HE WAS GOING TO LET JOHN GET SOME. AND AT FIRST I THOUGHT HE MEANT CANDY BUT LATER AS I FOUND OUT THAT WASN'T WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT.

SO LIKE ANYWAY, JOHN SHOWED UP AND SPAZ STARTED LIKE KISSING HIM, BUT JOHN JUST CALLED HIM A BITCH AND PUNCHED HIS NOSE, AND BLOODY BOOGERS STARTED COMING OUT. AND SPAZ STARTED SOBBING AND KEPT ASKING WHY, BUT JOHN DIDN'T ANSWER, HE JUST STARTED WHIPPING HIM IN THE FACE WITH HIS 30 INCH PENIS. AND THEN THESE 3 BIG BLACK GUYS CAME AND STARTED TO DO THE SAME THING (I THINK THEY PLAYED FOR THE BASKETBALL TEAM OR SOMETHING) SO ANYWAY THEN THEY ALL LIKE STARTED SHOVING THEIR DICKS IN SPAZ'S MOUTH ALL AT THE SAME TIME UNTIL THEY KNOCKED OUT ALL HIS TEETH AND HIS ORAL PLEASURE HOLE FILLED WITH BLOOD.

THEN I GOT BORED AND WENT HOME TO WATCH THE MIGHTY ORR BOTS.

:lol

[thebiggameover]

please stop with the stories max. its giving me a hard on at work...
:x

[hawaiian mage]

Dude! Mad Max!

GRATUITOUSLY CLEVER REMARK GRATUITOUSLY CLEVER REMARK GRATUITOUSLY CLEVER REMARK GRATUITOUSLY CLEVER REMARK GRATUITOUSLY CLEVER REMARK GRATUITOUSLY CLEVER REMARK GRATUITOUSLY CLEVER REMARK GRATUITOUSLY CLEVER REMARK

FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT TYPO IN THE MIDDLE OF IT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT FLAWLESS ARGUMENT

PROFESSIONAL CONCLUSION ACTUALLY EXPECTING MAD MAX TO LEAVE PROFESSIONAL CONCLUSION ACTUALLY EXPECTING MAD MAX TO LEAVE PROFESSIONAL CONCLUSION ACTUALLY EXPECTING MAD MAX TO LEAVE PROFESSIONAL CONCLUSION ACTUALLY EXPECTING MAD MAX TO LEAVE PROFESSIONAL CONCLUSION ACTUALLY EXPECTING MAD MAX TO LEAVE PROFESSIONAL CONCLUSION ACTUALLY EXPECTING MAD MAX TO LEAVE

[Father §p@z]

:o Max has now gayed up this thread beyond belief, but I don't hate him. Waste of emotions :|

[ThisIsWitty]

I confess that at one point in time I though Max was cool and I respected him some.

I don't think Hail Mary's or whatever will help, either.

[Anonymous]

Spaz: It was already fucking gay to begin with fucktard. What's comically pathetic is you somehow thought it wasn't. You're in fucking college for Christ's sake, lose the fucking Pokemon sheets already fucktard.

Witty: You still do fucktard.

Please transfer this thread to the mock wars.

:lol

[Father §p@z]

Keep it up Max, I'm feeling smarter every time you post. :)

[Seven Force]

Keep it up Max, I'm feeling smarter every time you post. :)

I don't know...took you three days to post that comeback.

:lol

[Terra]

They call it a "life" and quite a few of us have one besides here. :)

[Rongi]

SHITSTOOOOOOORM

[Terra]

Hey, welcome back. The shitpile hasn't been the same without you.

[Father §p@z]

If I ever find out who transfered this thread to the Mock wars, I'm gonna kick them square in the nuts!

[Anonymous]

I confess that it was me :lol

[Father §p@z]

*kicks Chojin in the nuts*

[Anonymous]

:lol

Spaz: Replying to my posts only makes you more of a fucktard. Please continue to prove your idiocy, and respond like the predictable fucktard you are. Oh and one more thing...

WELCOME TO HELL FUCKTARD!

:lol :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol

I WIN AGAIN!

:lol

[Father §p@z]

What's a "fucktard?" Is it like being fugly, or is it just some lame word Max made up?

[Anonymous]

Fucktard: One who is mentally deficient and mates with farm animals and little boys.

See also: Father Spaz

:lol

[Father §p@z]

I wasn't talking to you.

[Anonymous]

Doesn't matter fucktard.

[Father §p@z]

Fucktard: See also: Father Spaz

:lol

So, when you call someone a fucktard, you're saying that they're me?

[Anonymous]

Actually if I called them you, that would be worse than calling them a fucktard.

:lol

[Father §p@z]

I know a gaggle of poor African people who would cut off their feet to be me. I know a good lot of Americans like that too...

And please put this thread back in General Blabber where it belongs :(

[Anonymous]

Then I pity those Africans and Americans, fucktard.

I got 2 of your threads in here and another one locked.

This is hell, get used to it fucktard.

:lol

[Father §p@z]

Now that I'm dont talking to Mad Max, I'll take confessions again :(

[Father §p@z]

*done*

Damn you broken edit button!

[Anonymous]

Nobody cares fucktard. And the thread is mine now anyway. Stop being a bitch and bemoaning the fate of "your" thread.

:lol