ENCOURAGE ME TO KILL MYSELF

[CaptainBubba]

This way if I ever actually do it Ya'll can maybe get some very very minor news time if I put this board in a note or something.

Any encouragment will suffice as long as its both cruel and semi-realistic. Methods of termination, reasons to discontinue life, and just insults to my pride are all excellent additions to this thread o mine.

I will start thigns off here:

I should die.

[Anonymous]

but you're 13 weeks and 3 days pregnant

[the_dudefather]

live and let die

or something

and if you dont kill yourself, minorities or terrorists will

[Dole]

You post like you are dead already.

[FS]

Is this a joke???? >:

[Cosmo Electrolux]

another boring "Ooh, look at me" thread.....

[mburbank]

Can a character actuallly die?

[Dole]

No, they just get unfunnier

[Super Adelle]

you smell

[Helm]

your sprite jumps 4 pixels or so to the left and a little down in the middle of it's loop

[sadie]

no. bubba. no.

[kellychaos]

Method of excution is always a tricky question. I don't know whether it depends on personality or pain threshold. I'd start with that.

[hix1122]

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=manly_suicide

[Mr. Vagiclean]

THREAD ABORT

[CaptainBubba]

This is great guys. keep it coming. Maybe try to diversify your comments though and expand beyond the failure of my humor or posting quality and into the deeper, more depressing notion that I would give fuck? Or call me ugly? Cmon.

[Jixby Phillips]

you dont have the GUGTS

[CaptainBubba]

Awesome :love

[Jixby Phillips]

I bet you wont even do it right :lol

[CaptainBubba]

Help a brother out? :(

[GADZOOKS]

Real men don't need encouragement to kill themselves >:

[Sethomas]

Damn straight.

You should kill yourself out of shame for the fact that I had sex with your mom, despite the fact that she's fat and ugly.

[Jixby Phillips]

I just watched THE MATRIX and I think that it would be really awesome to kill yourself because of I watched it. Seriously guns are cool and i think you should kill yourself that way like in the MATRIX, and THE CATCHER IN THE RYE or whatever that fag book is and Marylin manson. Both of those things have people killing themselves in it and i think thats cool.

[McMock]

Remember: slice vertical, not horizontal.

[Dole]

Its only now that it has dawned on me that Bubba is in fact not a bloke.

[Crimson Ghost]

Even hookers won't have sex with you.

[kellychaos]

"I tell ya I get no respect from anyone. I bought a cemetery plot. The guy said, 'There goes the neighborhood!'"

"When I was born, I was so ugly that the doctor slapped my mother."

"When I started in show business, I played one club that was so far out, my act was reviewed in Field and Stream."

"Every time I get in an elevator, the operator says the same thing to me: `Basement?'"

"When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. ... and no one showed up."

"I never got girls when I was a kid. One girl told me, `Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. There was nobody home."

"When I was 3 years old, my parents got a dog. I was jealous of the dog, so they got rid of me."

"When we got married, the first thing my wife did was put everything under both names — hers and her mother's."

"With my wife, I don't get no respect. The other night there was a knock on the front door. My wife told me to hide in the closet."

"With my wife, I get no respect. I fell asleep with a cigarette in my hand. She lit it."