Military?

[DeadKennedys]

I'm going to go to a business school next year, and after that, I'm going to a cooking school. So, that's a hell of a lot of money. To even go the the first, cheaper, school, we have to mortgage our house to get the money, and I don't want to do that to my parents.

The other day (at 9 a.m. after falling asleep at 5) the army rectruiter called me, seeing as how I'm turning 18 in a couple of weeks. We got to talking, and I made it clear I'm not looking to be a grunt, but he said they could train me to be a cook for the army. So basically, I train in ROTC (Reserve officer training corps) during my first 4 years of college. During that time, they're paying all my college expenses. After those four years, I have to to three or so years of military service, but I'll come out as a lieutenant.

I made a 1280 on the SAT... would it be possible for me to get a big scholarship with that? I know they're looking to send fresh bodies to Iraq, and I wouldn't be surprised if it's still going on four years from now.

Is there anyone who could tell me if this sounds like a good idea or not? Cause right now it's looking like the only way.

[sspadowsky]

I would think a 1280 would net you some pretty respectable scholarship offers. They also have grants, obscure scholarships, and student loans. I think if you joined the military right now, your chances of ever going to school would be slim. Unless you're cool with joining, and cool with the idea of being shipped out, which you almost certainly will be, exhaust all other possibilities first.

[DeadKennedys]

Well, my friend and tae kwon do instructor is doing the same thing. He's four years ahead of me in school, and he won't go to the fight until the end of this school year. I think it might be an interesting experience nonetheless...

I'm 1/2 cherokee, but not registered because I was adopted by a caucasian family, so I can't get any minority shit >: But there are some random scholarships I'm looking into. Thanks.

[Archduke Tips]

Army recruiters will always make it sound better than it really is.

[El Blanco]

The army is going to send you where they need you. No matter what the recruiter promises you, the fine print on your contract is going to put you at their mercy.

A recruiter is a used car salesman. His job is to get your name on that dotted line.

Not that its hopeless or the end of your life. I know a lot of people who went in with the right attitude, did their best no matter what was thrown at them and are leading pretty good lives right now.

You just gotta know that they aren't going to bend over backwards to accimidate you.

[kellychaos]

If you do opt to join (and I don't know if I'd suggest it at this time as the current administration seems to be re-negging a bit on legal contracts and bending rules to its own bidding). However, your enlistment IS a legal contract. If you are intent on joining, the print is not THAT fine. Simply ask EXACTLY what your obligations are and for how long and hold him to it. Do a little research on your own. Hire a lawyer if you have to. It's been done, trust me. EB is right in that they are like used car salesman but that does not mean that they cannot be foiled. They have a legal obligation not to lie if the questions are asked properly. Go in prepared. Also, realize that grunts need to be fed too and the fact of being a cook in no way guarantees rear-echelon stationing. Also, army cooking is more along the lines of cafeteria-style food, so I would probably hold any promises of chef training by your recruiter as highly suspect. That's all I got.

[the_dudefather]

the main reason i would hate to join the army here is that it seems to be filled with football hooligans with a licence to kill.

same reason i would hate to go to prison really

[kellychaos]

You are sadly mistaken and there is no real comparison beyond haircuts, uniforms and cafeteria-style food. Don't disrespect my army like that ... even in jest.

[mburbank]

Not even in Jest? Come on, I thought that's what Jest was for, I thought that's was Jest was all about! Don't castrate Jest! Let jest be Jest! Jest is wide open and free and if you put it in a cage of what you can and cannot make Jest of, it won't be Jest anymore!

[kellychaos]

Oh, Christ on a bike! He can do it in jest, then ... but ONLY in jest. If I see him state it in any way other than jest, then I will have to take issue with it. There, I believe I was clear enough on that point. :posh

[Archduke Tips]

What are you going to do? Punch him through the internet?

[El Blanco]

E-punching. Its the latest thing. Its even going to be standard on the next edition of Windows.

[ziggytrix]

isn't DF's army a different army than KC's? or are you defending the UK's armed forces as well, KC?

WTF am I misremembering who uses the phrase "football hooligan"?

[Crimson Ghost]

You are way to smart to be a cook in the army. The dumbest of dumb are cooks because they can't function with the other soldiers and can't fire a weapon. If you have any pride, consider another position like mil. intelligence. Join after four years of college (when you graduate) as an officer.

[the_dudefather]

Oh, Christ on a bike! He can do it in jest, then ... but ONLY in jest. If I see him state it in any way other than jest, then I will have to take issue with it. There, I believe I was clear enough on that point. :posh

i was referring to the british army and i was 'jesting'. after all the site is i-mockery :) .

[MLE]

Well, my friend and tae kwon do instructor is doing the same thing. He's four years ahead of me in school, and he won't go to the fight until the end of this school year. I think it might be an interesting experience nonetheless...

I'm 1/2 cherokee, but not registered because I was adopted by a caucasian family, so I can't get any minority shit >: But there are some random scholarships I'm looking into. Thanks.

as long as you can prove your heritage, you can get incredible scholarships because of your heritage. don't go into the military. you'll be dead soon then. i don't necessarily like you on the boards, but that doesn't mean that i want you to die.

[mburbank]

WHAT IF HE JUST DIES IN JEST!?!

[executioneer]

IN JEST, PEOPLE!

[AChimp]

I think it's retarded that army recruiters fucking phone you when you're about to turn 18.

[mburbank]

ok but what about if they phone you in jest

[DeadKennedys]

I know it's gonna sound better than it is. I've seen the commercials and I know people who've really done the thing, and I'm prepared. I read somewhere that every personnel of the army must qualify with an M16 with no scope at 500 feet or something, so I'm not wanting to be a cook trying to get out of a fight. If that is what it's like, I've wanted to do air force, so that's my next option.

Anyway, I really appreciate your feedback. Military is my last resort, I'm glad to know that I can stilly try for some other scholarships, so thanks alot.

[AChimp]

ok but what about if they phone you in jest
Then that is acceptable. :|

[mburbank]

INGEST!

[AChimp]

I was got. :(

[kellychaos]

I know it's gonna sound better than it is. I've seen the commercials and I know people who've really done the thing, and I'm prepared. I read somewhere that every personnel of the army must qualify with an M16 with no scope at 500 feet or something, so I'm not wanting to be a cook trying to get out of a fight. If that is what it's like, I've wanted to do air force, so that's my next option.

Anyway, I really appreciate your feedback. Military is my last resort, I'm glad to know that I can stilly try for some other scholarships, so thanks alot.

All branches have M16 qualification. It's a standard really. the variation is in the distance and the type of firing stances used. At this time I blieve that the Ari Force is the best way to go in terms of benefits, training and how you get treated. They also seem to honor their enlistment contracts just as much or more than the army. I've heard horror stories about the "script being flipped" as far as the navy and marines go. Also keen to remember that the armed services do not base their promotions primarily on skill. It's a promotion points system that is dictated on the job skills they need. If they need certain job skills, the points at which one will get promoted within the job specialty are lowered, and thus promotions are easier to obtain in that area ... and vice versa. Your skill and initiative still play a part, but to a lesser degree. That is why you will see the promotion bar of combat arms positions set pretty low at the present time. It's all very logical and calculated. On the other end of the spectrum, we have cooks. A dime a dozen and a job specialty in which it is hard to get promoted because it is saturated. Just something I thoughjt you should know and may want to question your recruiter about. My guess is that he'll be suprised that you know this and ask you who told you that "lie". Anyway, good luck!

[Archduke Tips]

You just admitted that your own words were a lie.

My trust for you is diminished to the briney deep of Davy Jones's locker. :(

[kellychaos]

Me? Where did I lie exactly?

[Crimson Ghost]

The British Military... as a cook, God save the queen.

[kellychaos]

And a few bisquits. :yum

[Archduke Tips]

And a few bisquits. :yum

You're a DAMNED BISCUIT QUEER!