OFFICIAL: VINCEZEB TO IRAQ FUNDRAISER [Archive]

theapportioner

Mar 27th, 2003, 03:30 PM

Okay folks, here's the deal: VinceZeb, all 400 pounds of him, wants to kill some dirty "sand-niggas", but he can't get there. I've mentioned this before, but let's get the ball rolling. I'm guessing a one-way ticket to Kuwait or some other nearby country would cost several thousand dollars, given the short notice, but we can do it! Let's make a fat kid with violent skin conditions' dream come true!

I pledge $50.00 initially, and if we get to 90% of the projected cost, I'll cover the difference!

And if we can do it in the next two weeks, I'll throw in a customized "large size" Captain America costume! Those filthy Arabs will shudder in fear when they see the red, white, and blue!

The running tally (copy and paste, and add your name):

theapportioner: $50.00

Total: $50.00

edit: HERE'S THE LATEST UPDATE ON THE VINCEZEB-O-METER:
http://www.popndeth.com/imock/toiraq.jpg

mburbank

Mar 27th, 2003, 03:36 PM

I pledgamize $10.00!

theapportioner: $50.00
Mburbank: $10.00

Total: $60.00

Mar 27th, 2003, 03:47 PM

Hey wow, I'll chip in $50 of my own to watch him send some uppity towelheads to hell. He could lead the assault on Baghdad and teach the troops that the only two things in life to fear are God and the IRS! Or break out in hives and faint, and develop one hell of a sunburn because the troops enjoy him passed out more than spitting his concept of the awesome bloodlusting military machine in their faces.

That makes $110!

sspadowsky

Mar 27th, 2003, 03:57 PM

Shit, put me down for $50.

Better start packing your industrial-size suitcase, Vincey.

Total: $160.00
________
VAPOR AIR ONE (http://vaporizer.org)

The_Rorschach

Mar 27th, 2003, 04:02 PM

Put me down for $50. Check, Cash, Visa, or Mastercard. Your choice.

Better start training to field strip your rifle Vin.

Total: $210.00

Bennett

Mar 27th, 2003, 04:33 PM

50 bucks... just don't let my creditors know...

total: $260.00

Anonymous

Mar 27th, 2003, 04:36 PM

I'll buy the lotion for the hives

Anonymous

Mar 27th, 2003, 04:37 PM

$15. I'm poor.

theapportioner: $50.00
Mburbank: $10.00
FS: $50
Sspadowsky: $50
The_Rorschach: $50
Bennett: $50
Doopa: Lotion
Chojin: $15

Total: $275.00 + Lotion

Mar 27th, 2003, 04:37 PM

We need to get a graph for this fundraiser at the top of this board. Like, a blot shaped like America on the left, a blot shaped like Iraq on the right, and between them a little sweaty red tubby guy with a knotted hankerchief on his head, moving to the right as we raise more money for the trip.

mburbank

Mar 27th, 2003, 04:39 PM

$275.00 + LOTION!!!!!

Anything + Lotion = FUN

Mockery

Mar 27th, 2003, 04:39 PM

I'll donate the pork rinds. After all, big boys like VinceZeb have a big appetite.

Anonymous

Mar 27th, 2003, 04:43 PM

mburbank

Mar 27th, 2003, 04:44 PM

I wonder if Vince has any notion of how happy he's made so many people?

jin

Mar 27th, 2003, 04:48 PM

I have no money, but i will donate a chinese-replica colt .45 cap gun and a packet of caps.

We cant send the poor boy over with no protection.

$275.00 + LOTION!!!!! + CAP GUN

Show those towel-heads who the man! AMERICA IS THE MAN
USA USA USA!

Jeanette X

Mar 27th, 2003, 05:28 PM

Put me down for $50. Check, Cash, Visa, or Mastercard. Your choice.

Better start training to field strip your rifle Vin.

Total: $210.00

I'll be more than happy to donate if you go with him. Hell, I'll even get you a window seat.

punkgrrrlie10

Mar 27th, 2003, 05:36 PM

You can't just sign him up for the army? Wouldn't that make his trip free?

Anonymous

Mar 27th, 2003, 05:39 PM

All right, I've finished on his campaign logo.

http://www.popndeth.com/imock/captaintan.gif

Now for the fundraiser. :D

mburbank

Mar 27th, 2003, 05:46 PM

nice hives

Anonymous

Mar 27th, 2003, 06:04 PM

http://www.popndeth.com/imock/toiraq.jpg

Spinster, put this in the first post. I'll keep the image updated from here.

glowbelly

Mar 27th, 2003, 06:15 PM

fuckit, put me in for $50, too. what is that? $325??

Mar 27th, 2003, 06:22 PM

:lol perfect, Chojin.

ItalianStereotype

Mar 27th, 2003, 08:14 PM

why not? i'll put in my 50 as well...

he'll need some baby wipes to get rid of all the dirty towelhead booboo as well.

jin

Mar 27th, 2003, 08:17 PM

:lol

James

Mar 27th, 2003, 08:24 PM

You can't just sign him up for the army? Wouldn't that make his trip free?

Don't Ask, Don't Tell. And Vinnie tells. :(

Anyway, that's all good and fine to raise money for this, but what about raising funds for the camcorder and commentary by Bob Saget?

Protoclown

Mar 27th, 2003, 09:31 PM

Hell, it's for a good cause. I'll throw in $50!

Edit: By the way, when I saw Chojin's graphic I could not stop laughing for a good five minutes. :lol

VinceZeb

Mar 27th, 2003, 09:34 PM

Cool. Bit thinner on the picture, however. And pork rinds are disgusting.

Sure, give me the money. But make it a two way ticket. I plan on coming back. And I need good weapons, expert training, ya know, the stuff our glorious military uses!

But hey, I guess things like this is what liberals to try and seem clever. But hey, I think we need a paypal account for this, so someone needs to make something up quick so I can go buy the ticket.

theapportioner

Mar 27th, 2003, 11:43 PM

Great! We have bipartisan support!

No dude, only a one-way ticket. You're going to have to fulfill your "mission objectives" before we can let you home. And you do know, we're going to be making sure you get on that plane
safely -- America needs your help!

Kuwait is a bit pricey -- would you mind flying to Turkey or Israel? You can join some of dem anti-American human shield folks to Baghdad. Tickets are like 1300 bucks, we're already 1/4 of the way there!

VinceZeb

Mar 27th, 2003, 11:53 PM

Nah, I want a direct ticket. And I need to make sure I have enough money to buy supplies. And where is the paypal account to start this up?

You idiots want to be cute, lets see you put your money where your mouth is?

James

Mar 28th, 2003, 01:32 AM

Yeah right. Like we're really going to put our money in your hands. You'll just spend it on Crisco and duck meat, you fatty little bitch.

We'll buy the ticket, shove it down your throat, and kick you to Iraq, where you can play Rambo von Hitlercrat all you want.

Mar 28th, 2003, 04:24 AM

Here's a plan; we bribe some military official with the money to make him replace the explosive load in a MOAB with Vince, before it's flown to and dropped on Baghdad.

"Say, Bill... does this one seem heavier to you?"

VinceZeb

Mar 28th, 2003, 07:26 AM

Crisco and duck meat, huh? And I'm fat? No, what proof do you have of this?

Now, lets make an examination of you, shall we? First off, you are too shallow to care about a war, something that is real. This already shows that to the world that you are a worthless piece of shit. You have no attachment to reality. Your avatar pick.. "Hot Lunch"? Is that something that your 3 netgeek friends find funny? Because the vast majority of the world with at least one brain cell doesn't really think it is funny.

Oh yeah, I can guess the hot Friday night for Jamesman. He is going to sit his either hopelessly skinny or tubby fat ass down in front of his computer. He is going to surf second-rate humor sites that hardly anyone knows about. He is going to finish downloading his hentai tenacle porn and start beatin. Mom is going to bang on the door!

"Boy, take the garbage out"

And Jamesman will say in his pimply, whiny brace face voice. "I'M BUSY MOM! JESUS CHRIST, LEAVE ME ALONE!"

And there he goes on, wankin away. He is going to talk about how bad he is and how he doesnt need parents and he is a man who can survive on his own, even though he is a little highschooler or a 20+ year old who lives with his parents still.

"Get a job, you lazy worthless bitch!" The old man says.

"GAWD!!!!!", screams Jamesman. He runs into his room, with little tears rolling down his pimply cheeks. He sits down to the only person that cares, that understands... Miss La Blue Girl. So he continues to wank away at his 2 inch pecker.

"Hey, want to go out to a party?"

Our hip cool netgeek finishes a night of slamming someone over the net, so his ego is inflated. He is going out to get girls!

So Jamesman and his friends arrive at a party. For geek/loser standards, its pretty happenin'. But then, Jamesman fucks up!

"Hi, hows it going." A decent looking chick says.

"Hi!", Jamesman almost yelps in excitement, his penis hardening by the fact that A GIRL FINALLY NOTICED HIS EXISTANCE!

So the conversation continues, and then Jamesman, just like his entire existance, becomes a big fuck up. He begins to talk about comic books, video games, and obscure references to movies and sites no one cares about and it's obvious that this girl is not interested. But he keeps talking. Suddenly the girl just walks away and Jamesman releases his torrant of swearing and jokes about her socal status.

Jamesman feels good, he degraded someone! Too bad at the end of the day he is still going to be the only guy in town that hasnt even seen a chick with only a bra on in real life! But it doesnt matter, his little blue girl waits at home.

So that is the life of Jamesman. Now, you see, if you suddenly dissapear from the Earth today, no one would care. You are not that important in the grand sceme of things. Whereas I am. My reality doesn't end when the computer goes. Your's does. Shape up, little geek bitch. Reality is going to be hellish when it hits you. But continue to be yourself. Continue to try to be funny and/or cute. Wake up each morning with the realization that your life is worthless and not stimulating. I'll continue to wake up early, go work out, do important work, go to work and make a difference, and build up for a fun weekend starting late tonight.

When you are in your mom's basement or your dorky college dorm tonight, ask yourself: If I die, who's gonna give a shit? Frankly, it won't be me.

mburbank

Mar 28th, 2003, 10:01 AM

Jamesman. You are so schooled.

sspadowsky

Mar 28th, 2003, 10:17 AM

Less talk. More pledge.
________
Easy Vape Vaporizor (http://vaporizerinfo.com/)

VinceZeb

Mar 28th, 2003, 10:24 AM

I'm all for you giving me money for this ticket. I can set up a paypal account for it, if you would like.

Mar 28th, 2003, 10:34 AM

Fuck it, I'm donating another $50. Any second wasted here is a second Vince could be leaping out of exploding humvees and causing Iraqi hordes to mess themselves.

VinceZeb

Mar 28th, 2003, 10:38 AM

Well, do I need to set up this account or what? Are you going to actually pledge money or is this "fake", just like your ideas and arguments?

James

Mar 28th, 2003, 12:43 PM

I'm highly disturbed by your attentive descriptions involving my penis. I'd prefer that from this point forward, you keep your fantasies to yourself. Thank you.

I'll pledge $50. You guys take checks, right?

theapportioner

Mar 28th, 2003, 01:02 PM

Oh, we'll fund it, but we need guarantees first. Guarantees that you'll go. Punkgrrrlie, can you draft up a contract making sure that VinceZeb has to go? If you break it, we'll sue you for punitive damages.

BTW, got a passport yet? You might want to start working on your will, too.

Mockery

Mar 28th, 2003, 02:10 PM

But hey, I guess things like this is what liberals to try and seem clever

You heard it from Vince first. My, my, my... he certainly does have a way with words doesn't he?

ItalianStereotype

Mar 28th, 2003, 03:24 PM

he is even accusing both rorschach and myself of being liberals :faint

way to burn bridges there, buddy...

Vibecrewangel

Mar 28th, 2003, 03:36 PM

I am most impressed with the fact that he Jamesman to pledge.....now that takes some mad skillz

And in a completely sheeple moment.....I'll pledge $20.00

mburbank

Mar 28th, 2003, 04:22 PM

I agree there has to be a contract. Once that's in order we can right a check and hand it over. But we need something in return as an act of good faith. I know! How about a letter inviting Vince to be an officer on a Nuclear Submarine?

KevinTheOmnivore

Mar 28th, 2003, 05:11 PM

This board gets so much more interesting when I'm not around. :(

$10

Mar 28th, 2003, 05:35 PM

$10! What are you, un-American? >:

VinceZeb

Mar 28th, 2003, 06:43 PM

I will go, but on one condition. Max hand delivers the ticket. Then after I spit in his face and then break it, I will be on my plane trip to Iraq.

Either this way or this whole thread is proven stupid. No exceptions. No stupid contracts. None of that idotic "Let's make something up to sound cool" bullshit. Put up or shut up.

James

Mar 28th, 2003, 07:40 PM

Make that $60.

Anonymous

Mar 28th, 2003, 08:59 PM

We'll buy the ticket for you. Because otherwise you'll take the money and go LOL LOOK HOW I GOT THOSE LIBERALS BACK :lol :lol I'LL DONATE THIS TO RICH PEOPLE INSTEAD :lol :lol

My mother pledges $20 if you give us your personal information to send to a recruiting center. Hives wouldn't keep you out of the military. If you like, she has a friend that could probably pull some strings to get you in.

*Cool. Bit thinner on the picture, however.
I got the tan part right, though, yes?

Protoclown

Mar 29th, 2003, 01:57 AM

Either this way or this whole thread is proven stupid. No exceptions. No stupid contracts. None of that idotic "Let's make something up to sound cool" bullshit. Put up or shut up.

Yeah, right. You think we're going to put up our money without some kind of guarantee that you'll go? How do we know you won't break out in hives and chicken out when the time actually comes to do the deed? I think we need assurances here, and the contract will give us just that. We're MORE than willing to put our money up to the cause if you're willing to be serious about it. It is YOU who needs to "put up or shut up".

The_Rorschach

Mar 29th, 2003, 07:17 PM

He's already talking scared. Training and equpiment? Your problem, you stupid, whining, well-worn cunt. Words and words, you've spilled on this board, when I doubt you've done so much as given up a day of your time for anyone else. You want an army of homocidal maniacs? You want to see people in the military stripped of their humanity to insure your flabby ass can live without comprehening the horrors of war?

You tell us to put our money where our mouth is? We have. None of us here are strangers to one another. Go look in the General Forum. 80% of these fucks meet up every goddamned year. They'll pay, and so will I.

Will you fight? Or will you continue to take the easy way out? Be a man Zeb, and either admit you're utterly and totally full of shit, or pack your bags and die for what you believe in.

VinceZeb

Mar 29th, 2003, 07:42 PM

Wah wah wah. So, what does me going out and fighting for this land have anything to do with you not doing the same.

Chojin, tell your mother she is about 2 years too late. Like I said, if I could join, I would. But they will NOT allow me. Nope. No way. No how. And it isnt hives, you fucking choad. It's a condition that has a symptom of hives. Learn the difference.

Wow, geeks off the net meet! Wow, I bet that is a fun time! I can imagine how that works......

The LAN games, the D&D, the anime watching, the dissing of people while on the net, the "crazy" pictures, man, I bet it is just great! Just like the Portal of Evil party! :lol

Sign me up! Oh, I'm sorry, I have friends I associate with outside of a message board that does nothing for me but to pass some time. Man, I guess I will have to miss out on that big fun! I perfer to do things that are fun, sorry.

The_Rorschach

Mar 29th, 2003, 07:49 PM

"Wah wah wah. So, what does me going out and fighting for this land have anything to do with you not doing the same"

For one thing, I did my four in the Navy. The end of my service concluded during our war in Afghanistan, but my rate was over manned and I was filling a cross-rate billet so I felt safe in taking a brief sabbatical. When I got out, I started college, and I'm still there. Latest thoughts were enlisting afterwards and going OCS (to be an Officer). As situations stand: if biogical agents are released as a result of our invasion of Baghdad and/or the war continues until the end of summer when I would start the new semester, I fully intend to reenlist again and put my education off awhile longer. I still have four years of my obligation to make up and I don't consider the reserves enough to exonerate me.

As for them meeting up, don't by any means believe I'm on the inside of the I-Mockery Clique. I burned that bridge awhile ago. I critique whomever I think deserves it when I do.

James

Mar 29th, 2003, 08:48 PM

Wah wah wah. So, what does me going out and fighting for this land have anything to do with you not doing the same.

We're not the ones flapping our gums about what we'd do if we were in Iraq, or Rambo.

The LAN games, the D&D, the anime watching, the dissing of people while on the net, the "crazy" pictures, man, I bet it is just great!

Whether or not that's what actually goes on, it beats what you and your "friends" do; Something about guzzling down 2-liter bottles of Pepsi Blue and dressing up like your favorite Star Wars characters for a circle jerk doesn't sound all that fun to me.

Sign me up! Oh, I'm sorry, I have friends I associate with outside of a message board that does nothing for me but to pass some time. Man, I guess I will have to miss out on that big fun! I perfer to do things that are fun, sorry.

Don't act so high and mighty. It's not like you'd ever be accepted into the group. You're like the kid who gets turned down by a girl he wants to date, and then says, "Yeah, I decided I didn't wanna go with her. She's misinformed."

And if you need to "pass some time" by spending 1/2 the day on a message board that despises you just as much as you claim to despise it, then nothing you can say can hold any merit. Get outside and walk around the block, tubbo. It'll help jiggle loose some of those crumbs that have fallen into your jelly rolls.[/quote]

VinceZeb

Mar 29th, 2003, 08:58 PM

Sorry, Pepsi Blue looks like Windex and I hate Star Wars, so no can do there.

I wouldn't be a part of this enclave of losers if I had no life. I would rather take part in a stamp-collection society.

Actually I love be on here becuase its fun to see net geeks run off their mouths like they are high and might, where as in the real world, you wouldn't step to me for a million dollars. Because you are doing just that: Hiding on a message board.

Oh wait, I am going on a date tonight. Hot lil' latino chick, as per my friend's description. Waiting to get some warm shower water. What are YOU doing tonight? Spanking off and watching HBO? Playing bingo with your grandmother? Going over to a friends house and sneaking in drags of a joint behind your friend's parents back? BIG BIG FUN! Have fun, pathetic piece of shit!

(edit: I apologize. I did not mean to insult the fine game of bingo like that.)

jin

Mar 29th, 2003, 09:51 PM

I perfer to do things that are fun, sorry.

WOW. You like FUN THINGS. I guess YOU are the authority on the subject of FUN THINGS and well, everybody else must be deluding themselves if they are doing things they think are fun but not.

Also, for someone who is so ultra-american, you dont speak english very well do you? Half of your statements are gibberish which make no sense, also the way you attack people's lifestyles when they speak against you leaves a LOT to be desired - come on, didnt the "OH YEAH??? WELL YOU'RE A NERD" argument kinda lose its effectiveness in grade 6?

Ive also noticed all YOU seem to do is leave long-winded, rambling, incoherent posts which have little or no basis on facts or reality, most of the time based on your own delusions and/or misinterpretations of random articles and such.

Really,
"Oh wait, I am going on a date tonight. Hot lil' latino chick, as per my friend's description"

???

Does anyone really care? Does Going out with a girl really make you any more justified or correct when it does not relate in any way to the argument presented???

"War is wrong!"

"OH YEAH??? YOU ARE A NERD. AND A LIBERAL. AND I AM GOING OUT, WITH A HOT LATINO, AND YOU ARE A NERD. LIBERAL."

Dont worry! In real life you are popular and attractive and smart and everybody loves you and loves listening to your opinions, and becaues you get sex all the time - THEY MUST BE RIGHT!

Remember, chojin, its not hives, its only a skin condition which is exactly the same, so no one will get confused except stupid nerds!

Skin conditions are the SEX baby. :love :yum

Have fun on your date baby!

Jeanette X

Mar 29th, 2003, 09:55 PM

I critique whomever I think deserves it when I do.

Really? Because from what I know about debate, "critiquing" is usually done respectfully, without gross personal insults.
And its not a matter of "does this person deserve to be crituqued?", its a matter of "is this person's arguement flawed?". You, on the other hand, use debating as nothing more than an excuse to berate other people so you can feel smart.

James

Mar 29th, 2003, 09:58 PM

Actually I love be on here becuase its fun to see net geeks run off their mouths like they are high and might, where as in the real world, you wouldn't step to me for a million dollars. Because you are doing just that: Hiding on a message board.

Well if that isn't the pot calling the kettle black. :rolleyes

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:02 AM

I bet Vince is a bubble-boy. If we find out where he lives, we could roll him to Iraq and there wouldn't be a thing he could do about it.

The_Rorschach

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:17 AM

" Because from what I know about debate. . ."

You have illustrated many times that you don't know shit. This case is no different.

Anonymous

Mar 30th, 2003, 11:39 AM

Schach, you only really 'burnt bridges' to two people here, one who doesn't even post here anymore, and the other whom is willing to be friends again.

You're quick to put all your eggs in one basket, leave the vault for a coin, etc. Just learn to appreciate what you have and place your trust in several areas. That way, if one of your ties is severed, you'll still have several others supporting you. It limits your freedom a little, but anyone you trust should be a friend and would understand dramatic changes you have to make.

Now, for Vinniqua - I'm aware that hives aren't your problem. "Hives" don't go away when you put "Clearasil" on them. Shoo, have fun now, and don't faint in the shower before your big date. Carry a pack of travel tissues in case you get a nosebleed. Take her someplace distinguished and you might even coerce her to fan you with the placemat when you start feeling woozy.

Jeanette X

Mar 30th, 2003, 12:11 PM

You have illustrated many times that you don't know shit. This case is no different.
Golly Professor, I didn't know personal insults were commonly used in debate! Why, Bush must have gotten elected because he won debates with Gore by calling him an "ignorant little shit" and saying things like "My fellow Americans, my worthy oppenent doesn't know shit."
Yes, that must have been what made America want to listen to him!
You know, you could point out to me where my arguements are flawed without insulting me....
Oh wait, you wouldn't do that, would you? Oh no...that would actually be PRODUCTIVE!
Nope...you'd rather sit there at your computer and talk down to the me, and all the rest of us. Oh, how little we ignorant masses know compared to you, oh wise one! Oh Roscharch, surely your postings will one day be shelved alongside Aristotle! Is it hard to type with all that semen clogging your keyboard?
If you think you have silenced me in the least on this forum, you are dead wrong. I will continue to speak my mind, offer my imput, and ask questions of other people.
I now offically hate you, and I consider you my sworn enemy here.

VinceZeb

Mar 30th, 2003, 12:49 PM

Hi jin, and thank you for asking about my date! It went very well. Now, let me give you a quick run down.

* Dates got here with my two friends, really hot girl
* Went out to eat at the Cali Pizza Kitchen (which I got the whitest meal in mankind)
* Saw a movie
* Came back to my appt becuase my roomate was turning 22
* Drunk alcohol
* Watched my friend get a lap dance from 4 fine women
* Got to feel the difference between a 35DDD natural breast and a 34D implant (never felt an implant before. If you are just groping, no diff, but if you push in, its weird.)
* Almost called the cops when the 34D woman said she was getting her implants taken out :tear
* Went skinny dipping in our pool.....
* Got some underwater handjob action :rock
* Watched a fight almost start
* Had more fun

Now, I could go on, but I think I have proved my point. I had a nice, fun time yesterday, even thought I am supposedly some zit-faced covered 400lbs geek.

And oh yeah, I gotta another date with this woman. So I must have done something right.

Skin conditions (which I don't have) arent the sex. My dick is the sex, baby. Ask your mother.

edit: Oh yeah, almost forgot. Decided to play some drunk basketball at 3 in the morning. We didn't know it was 3 until some asshole across the street opened his deck door and told us nicely.

Anonymous

Mar 30th, 2003, 12:58 PM

http://www.popndeth.com/imock/vinniestrip01.gif

VinceZeb

Mar 30th, 2003, 01:22 PM

*pats Chojin on the head*

You are a nice little tool. Sorry, I am not 7ft. I am 6'3". But hey, what did YOU do last night. I had a nice night in the realm of reality. What did YOU do, hmmmmmm?

Exactly what I thought. Because as opposed to you, I can never come back here again and life would go on. You would probably cry and lurk in your corner somewhere or at least go show your athletic prowless at the nearest DDR machine.

Protoclown

Mar 30th, 2003, 02:08 PM

Chojin, I MUST see more of those comics! :lol

And Vince, I don't think I've ever seen anyone on this message board so insecure as you. For fuck's sake man, do you really have to go out of your way to brag and gloat about every little fictional thing you do?

ItalianStereotype

Mar 30th, 2003, 02:33 PM

I now offically hate you, and I consider you my sworn enemy here.

this isnt my fight, but i feel i must say something. truly, you think too highly of yourself.

Jeanette X

Mar 30th, 2003, 02:39 PM

[/quote]

this isnt my fight, but i feel i must say something. truly, you think too highly of yourself.[/quote]

Is that adressed at me or Roscharch?

Protoclown

Mar 30th, 2003, 02:40 PM

Okay, so maybe Jeanette's statement was a little dramatic, but how does that equate to her "thinking too highly of herself"?

And you'd be hard pressed to find anyone here who thinks as highly of themself as Rorshach. He exudes pure, inflated ego. I liked Rorshach when he first showed up two years or so ago but his overbearingly cocksure attitude and pompous rhetoric have really been annoying the shit out of me lately.

AChimp

Mar 30th, 2003, 02:41 PM

:lol

Chojin's comic is better than mine. :(

ItalianStereotype

Mar 30th, 2003, 02:46 PM

Jeanette X

Mar 30th, 2003, 02:52 PM

yes, rorschach is egotistical. i agree wholeheartedly with that, but he has proven that he has the right to be. jeanette, on the other hand, hasnt. i admit that some of this is just because i dont like her, it is a bit difficult to like someone who makes a thread about their menstrual cramps and doesnt even realize that i was talking to them even though i quoted her directly. :/

You don't have to like me. I have my faults, I admit it. But I have never been accused of thinking to highly of myself, and I have no idea how you concluded that I do.

As for Rorschach-being egotistical is one thing, but unprovoked insults from him are another.

VinceZeb

Mar 30th, 2003, 03:36 PM

Now Proto, its not bragging if it the truth.

I am greatly secure. I just feel like wasting a few mintues by letting netgeeks simmer in the realization that when their computer goes off, their "coolness" goes bye bye.

So don't be jealous that I have a social life.

And Chojin, draw all you want, doesn't stop the fact that I got a little action last night and you didn't. Hope those comics help you late at night to build up your self-esteem when you are getting yourself off.

Two conversations in this thread.. think Ill step aside.

James

Mar 30th, 2003, 03:42 PM

* Dates got here with my two friends, really hot girl
* Went out to eat at the Cali Pizza Kitchen (which I got the whitest meal in mankind)
* Saw a movie
* Came back to my appt becuase my roomate was turning 22
* Drunk alcohol
* Watched my friend get a lap dance from 4 fine women
* Got to feel the difference between a 35DDD natural breast and a 34D implant (never felt an implant before. If you are just groping, no diff, but if you push in, its weird.)
* Almost called the cops when the 34D woman said she was getting her implants taken out :tear
* Went skinny dipping in our pool.....
* Got some underwater handjob action :rock
* Watched a fight almost start
* Had more fun

And all in 10 minutes. :(

For the record, that handjob was from your drunk birthday boy, fatty. Don't kid yourself.

Even if this is real, it makes me think even less of you and your "date." It sounds more like you guys bought a bunch of hookers, or just picked up some really slutty crack addicts. Doesn't speak much for you there, Vinnie.

And Chojin, if you don't do more of that comic I'm going to kill you. :lol

Protoclown

Mar 30th, 2003, 03:57 PM

Now Proto, its not bragging if it the truth.

Actually Zeb, I believe you're misinformed.

brag

\Brag\, v. i. [imp. & p. p. Bragged; p. pr. & vb. n. Bragging.] [OE. braggen to resound, blow, boast (cf. F. braguer to lead a merry life, flaunt, boast, OF. brague merriment), from Icel. braka to creak, brak noise, fr. the same root as E. break; properly then, to make a noise, boast. ?95.] To talk about one's self, or things pertaining to one's self, in a manner intended to excite admiration, envy, or wonder; to talk boastfully; to boast; -- often followed by of; as, to brag of one's exploits, courage, or money, or of the great things one intends to do.

Conceit, more rich in matter than in words, Brags of his substance, not of ornament. --Shak.

Syn: To swagger; boast; vapor; bluster; vaunt; flourish; talk big.

Source: Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary, © 1996, 1998 MICRA, Inc.

So sorry to prove you WRONG there. I don't see anything about bragging and lying being related in any way whatsoever.

I am greatly secure. I just feel like wasting a few mintues by letting netgeeks simmer in the realization that when their computer goes off, their "coolness" goes bye bye.

Then why do you go out of your way to act like you've got something to prove? I'm not "cool", nor do I falsely pretend to be. In fact, I'll be first to admit that I'm a geek. Does that make me less credible in this forum's discussions somehow?

So don't be jealous that I have a social life.

I'm supposed to be jealous of that pathetically shallow list of your evening's entertainment? Please. I think you're pathetic, and coming from a guy who really DID play D&D last night, that should say something.

And Chojin, draw all you want, doesn't stop the fact that I got a little action last night and you didn't. Hope those comics help you late at night to build up your self-esteem when you are getting yourself off.

Is this some kind of admission that you have a secret webcam set up in Chojin's bedroom or something? Because you know, I'm just sort of wondering how you can know that he didn't get any "action" last night.

VinceZeb

Mar 30th, 2003, 04:00 PM

Well, James, I care if you think less of me. Trust me. It pains me every day and night to know that my little lifeless EQ playin' netnerd funny man thinks less of me.

I actually have made a chart that I put by my bed. It is titled "What Jamesman thinks about me". I look at it every day and fill it out. And if I have been a good boy and Jamesman thinks highly of me, I go have a milkshake. And if I have been a bad boy... well, I go and slam my head onto a brick wall and run down the street naked screaming "JAMESMAN DOESNT LOVE ME! JAMESMAN DOESNT LOVE ME!"

Yes, becuase your opinion of me is very important. Your opinon and 3 bucks can buy me a Veggie Delight sandwich at Subway.

punkgrrrlie10

Mar 30th, 2003, 04:08 PM

VinceZeb

Mar 30th, 2003, 04:18 PM

Proto, here is why I take such joyous pleasure in making people look like chumps:

1) The internet has allowed people to hide behind masks to be something that they are not. When I was a younging (9th grade), I started to go into that direction. A rude awakening of seeing who was behind all these facades jolted me back into reality. The 'net allows the nerds, geeks, and losers of our society replace something that, in the real world, they should try hard to acquire: A spine.

2) See, what makes people pissed off the most is that I am right about most of my assumptions. If there is one thing the nerds, geeks, dorks, etc. of our society hate, is when reality follows them into the cyber realm and they are put in their place there as well. Now, I don't begrudge anyone on how they want to spend their Saturday night. I had a good night last night, and I only pointed it out because people like to talk shit. I believe when people talk about others that they better have enough behind them to do it. I don't like to brag or be cocky, but I can when the time arises.

I can be either Mr. Party-fun time, or I can sit on my ass and play my Xbox (like I'm doing today). I can go to a bar or sit at home and read a book. I can go to Dave and Buster's or the strip club. I am a multfaceted individual. Play music or watch it. So on and so forth.

Do I act like this when off this board? When circumstances are needed for it. Do I want to be like this even on this board? Not at all. But when I'm challenged in no matter what I do, if it is worth it at least to me, I meet the challenge. This seemed like it would be worth it.

Now, could one day me and you sit down and just have a fun ol time playing Metal Slug in an arcade sometime? Probably. But I only react to people the way I am being reacted to. I am very quick to sterotype because my sterotypes are usually about 80% correct.

I believe I am a very calm cool and collective person, but when it comes to things that are truly important in the world, I can't be. As the great Barry Goldwater once spoke to a crowd: "I would remind you that extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice! And let me remind you also that moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue!"

Anonymous

Mar 30th, 2003, 04:30 PM

I like star trek!

Protoclown

Mar 30th, 2003, 04:36 PM

Your opinon and 3 bucks can buy me a Veggie Delight sandwich at Subway.

OMG!!! VINCEZEB IS JARED!!! :eek

The_Rorschach

Mar 30th, 2003, 04:46 PM

Your distraction tactics won't work with us Zeb. Instead of typing, I'd suggest you start trying to get some exercises in.

The total with Glowbelly was $325, adding to that:

Italian: $50
Jamesman: $60
Kevin : $10
Chojin's Mom: $20
Proto: $50

Total: $515

If I missed anyone, I apologise.

VinceZeb

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:10 PM

Rorschach, I went and ran 33 mintues on a elliptical machine on a mountain climbing setting, went through my weight lifting routine, and did my ab work out this morning when I got up. What did you do today? That is what I thought. If you would like a copy of my workout routine, I'd be glad to give it to ya.

Oh yeah, then I paid a visit to your mother and made her drink my cum from a tropical drink glass. I even included the little umbrella! :)

theapportioner

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:14 PM

I want to see this lean, mean, fighting machine!

James

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:18 PM

Rorschach, I went and ran 33 mintues on a elliptical machine on a mountain climbing setting

"I went to McDonalds today, but it was on top of a hill. It took me almost a half hour to lug my fat ass up the 20-degree incline."

went through my weight lifting routine

"They made me carry my two trays of food all by myself to my seat."

and did my ab work

"Finally, I had to squeeze my tub of lard I call a stomach into the booth."

Oh yeah, then I paid a visit to your mother and made her drink my cum from a tropical drink glass.

I don't have a translation for this. But it just goes to show how sad "mom" jokes are. Your credibility and worthiness of being acknowledged, while slim to begin with, becomes less and less every time you type a sentence on here.

Protoclown

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:26 PM

If you would like a copy of my workout routine, I'd be glad to give it to ya.

GEE, THAT WOULDN'T HAPPEN TO BE HIDING IN THE SAME PLACE AS THAT NUCLEAR SUBMARINE LETTER, WOULD IT? :rolleyes

KevinTheOmnivore

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:30 PM

Oh yeah, then I paid a visit to your mother and made her drink my cum from a tropical drink glass. I even included the little umbrella! :)

Looks like the wives aren't the only ones in trouble when Loose zipper zebby is in town!!!

AChimp

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:31 PM

Jamesman made me LOL.

Oh, I'd like to donate $500, but after the exchange rate, that become $12.71 :(

VinceZeb

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:32 PM

This board isn't worth the time to think of a good momma joke. It's existance and the main residence here are a great enough joke enough.

Man, I can see Jamesman now:

*starts to scan the posts on the board*

"OH HO! *Snort* There is a post by VinceZeb!"

Quickly, his stubby fingers fly towards the keyboard so he can be the first to fire off his razor blade sharp wit. The sweat begins to roll off his brow, rolling down his face and onto his supple man-breast.

"Wow, Vince said something about working out! How can use my vast intellectual powers to turn this to something funny!"

Thinking about what he wants to do right now, since he doesn't have car no job because he mooches off his parents, he sees an empty McDonald's chicken nugget box laying on his dirty, unkempt floor! The geek's spine siffens.

"AH HA! I will use a vast McDonald's comeback! That will show HIM! *Snort*"

Quickly, so he can watch the new anime porn he just downloaded, he types out cute one liners about McDonalds. His ass crack gets sweaty as he is flying his chubby fingers along the keyboard, anticipiating the completion of his post so he can go wank off to those beautiful anime women. The women he deserves and would get if they were only real!

"YES! Take that, Vinny!" He chuckles as he begins to unzip his pants.....

"OH MY GOD! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" screams one of his mother's younger friends as she opens Jamesman's door.

Jamesman's faux-self esteem is shattered as he sits there, flabby stomach hanging over his penis that you could thread a needle with, ready to masturbate to pictures of women who are not real.

"WAAHHHHHH!!!!" Jamesman runs out the door, pulling his pants up. He then hikes to the only place where that understands him: The local Baskin Robins and then to the local comic/game store.

Now, lets recap Jamesman: I do things, I have a social life. I have responsabilities I take on full handedly. I work out and exercise every day. I eat healthy, because fast food is nothing but fat and oil and sugar, which suprising enough was found on the floor where your tears fell.

Now, Jamesman, would you like to stop trying to act like your superior to me or shall I just keep posting these little truths about yourself? I can stop and ignore your existance (just like the women of the world do), or I can keep going. You decide.

AChimp

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:39 PM

I have responsabilities I take on full handedly.
I don't think that there's any doubt you take your job as "Semen Extractor" at the local humane society very seriously. It can be very cruel to leave an animal alone with an untreated erection. :(

VinceZeb

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:42 PM

Then I guess the ladies of Canada are cruel to you then, huh?

Protoclown

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:46 PM

Frankly, VinceZeb, I'm apalled that you would make "fat jokes" about Jamesman. First of all, you don't even know if he's fat (if you'd seen his picture you would know that he is not), and secondly, it seems grossly unfair to me that you, a former weight challenged person yourself, would go and make fun of others for the same thing. I cannot believe you would be so insensitive.

you fat fuck

James

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:48 PM

A "good momma joke" is an oxymoron. Just like a thin Vinnie Zeb.

And didn't you already post a story like that somewhere else? I just skimmed it over and saw it had to do with me and my mom, so I'm not positive. But I am positive your originality is over in Iraq. Go over and get it.

Anonymous

Mar 30th, 2003, 06:59 PM

http://www.popndeth.com/imock/vinniestrip02.gif

James

Mar 30th, 2003, 07:02 PM

:lol

VinceZeb

Mar 30th, 2003, 07:54 PM

YOU GOT TO FEEL BOOBS OMG!!!! YOU ARE SO COOL!!! PAID FOR BOOBS ARE SO COOL! IF YOU PAY A GIRL TO FEEL HER BOOBS SHE WILL LET YOU DO IT!!! WOW, IT MUST'VE BEEN SO DIFFICULT TO GET HER TO LET YOU.

Veggie delight? Are you gay or somethin?

Actually, I didn't pay anything. And not really. I actually didn't want to at first, because it was kind of rude. But then my concept of girls is different I guess (ya know, modest, don't want guys feeling them up, etc).

yes, Veggie Delight. It is low calorie, cheap and tasty. I control the number of calories/fat/carbs I take in every day. I didn't work this hard to lose all this weight so I could end up losing right before I'm about to hit the final lap. And no, I am not gay. No more than you are cool by using the 'uber-kool' grrrrl teeny-hardcore girl cliche.

Chojin, the funny thing is you are taking time out to draw these. That is pretty sad. But we all know someone that is the "Gay Alien Bondage Dog" is the epitamey of 'cool'. I do hope they keep you warm at night, because when the computer goes off, I get to have my nice life that I am enjoying quite much, and your still a loser. So sleep tight with your second rate drawings.

Proto, yep, I am insensitive. I could give a fuck less if I insult anyone on this board. OOOOHHH I am insulting! Wow. Get a life.

Protoclown

Mar 30th, 2003, 09:56 PM

Oh, I HAVE a life, VinceZeb! And since you mentioned my life, let me give you an unsolicted description of how AWESOME and RADICAL it is! Cowabunga dude!

First off, I've started going to the YMCA so I'm working on getting stronger and whipping my ass into shape. After all, it's not easy to be a "pussyfied idiot misinformed liberal" so I figure I'd better work out so I can put my money where my mouth is and shape up so I can NOT go fight in Iraq because I don't believe this war is just.

And also, I'm eating healthy, counting my calories, carbs, and fat intake. I'm also drinking milk (from your mommas titties! nooch!) which is giving me the calcium to develop strong bones and healthy skin! I'm avoiding fast food now, because that's just full of a bunch of fatty crap that isn't good for you anyway.

And for my friend's birthday last month, me and some other friends went to a strip club and a couple of them chipped in and paid for me to get a lap dance. I didn't want to do it, but it was my money, so I figured "what the hell", you know? But then, the chick who gyrating all over my lap liked me so much she invited me back to her apartment for an all-night, all-out fuckfest! With not just her but several other strippers too! At first I felt bad about it and all, because it went against my 'code of chivalry" to do something so shallow, but they pretty much made me do it! Yep, they tied me to the bedposts and fucked me like a pot-bellied stallion all night long! Hifive! Zaaaaaang! Awwww yeah, you jive turkeys!

So I guess you can see that I have quite an envious life after all. I can understand if you're jealous, and I realize that's really the only reason you disagree with me about anything. Nobody's really that stupid in real life.

Well, I've got to get back to my awesome lifestyle now, the concubines are waiting to oil up my gorgeous bronzed body and feed me grapes while giving me the massage of my life! See you losers later! :rolleyes

Protoclown

Mar 30th, 2003, 09:57 PM

Oh yeah, and did I mention that the stripper who fucked me all night long was a beautiful black chick? Cuz I wanted to be sure I didn't leave that out, it's real important. Okay, thanks!

Protoclown

Mar 30th, 2003, 10:02 PM

Oh yeah, and I also got an offer to serve as an office assistant on a yellow submarine. I even got a personalized letter about it and everything!

And if you don't believe me, I can even produce the letter and show it to you. I'd be MORE than happy to scan it in for you so you can see it for yourself.

Protoclown

Mar 30th, 2003, 10:06 PM

Okay, well I thought about that letter for a minute and realized that I have better things to do than waste my time trying to prove shit to a bunch of fucks on a message board (who I couldn't give a shit what they think anyway), so I'm not going to look for it right now.

Because I think one of my roommates might have thrown it away, but I'm not entirely certain, and I really don't care enough to check. Believe me, these offers are a dime a dozen for a guy like me. I'm constantly getting solicitations from powerful and important people asking for my time, services, and money. And important guy like me tends to be in pretty high demand, let me just tell you.

So I'm sure if I REALLY wanted to I could probably find that letter, but as of right now I can't even really be bothered, even though I just promised that I would produce it as proof. But I don't really care, so now I'm not going to.

See you losers later! I've got a hot "AIM date" tonight with someone who assures me she's a "hot lil' latino chick" so I'm probably going to be out late and pretty busy, if you know what I'm sayin'. ;)

VinceZeb

Mar 30th, 2003, 10:06 PM

All I have to say is this:

Who did the things that I described this morning last night?

I did.

Who played D&D last night?

You did.

Think thats the end of that argument.

Protoclown

Mar 30th, 2003, 10:08 PM

Yep. I played D&D last night, that's true. How does that do anything to damage my credibility?

James

Mar 30th, 2003, 10:55 PM

If anything, it just gives Proto one more point, and you one less.

The bottom line is you're Vinnie Zeb, and we're not. Everything you do is stupid. Everything you say is stupid. Everything you stand for is stupid.

Proto (or any one of us for that matter) could stay home and shove corn bits from our poop up our nasal cavaties, and still have a better night than you and your friends/hookers. Nothing you will ever do will one-up us and our lives, because you're Vinnie Zeb, and we're not.

Nuff said, fatty.

VinceZeb

Mar 31st, 2003, 09:19 AM

I could write a long diatribe, but you are not worth it, Jamesman.

Ignorance is bliss. When people look up that saying in a book, there will be a picture of Jamesman. Ignorant, uncaring, foolish, and naive.

Must be nice. Have fun in your life pushing the wheel while others do something useful. When you die, you will do it as you lived: Stupid, useless, naive, and without a soul.

Anonymous

Mar 31st, 2003, 09:44 AM

The comics take about 15 minutes and I'm not doing them for your fat sake.

I'm doing it...for the people

Mar 31st, 2003, 10:35 AM

http://www.fragile-minds.com/fatsatan/sigs/vincezeb.gif

The_Rorschach

Mar 31st, 2003, 02:50 PM

"I control the number of calories/fat/carbs I take in every day."

And I'll bet your colon is the strongest muscle in your body. Your life sounds pretty fucking shitty Zeb, and you have my sympathies. If getting laid is the height of your ambition -something which takes little or no effort-, and your total self concept is base upon how you look -a superficiality which is fleeting at best-, you are more shallow, stupid and useless than anyone I've ever met in the real world. Or even on the Wired for that matter.

You are crass, classless and, worse than any of these, you are boring. Your words are numb and fumbling, revealing more of your pathetic desperate nature than hurting the image of others. The only purpose in tearing others down, is so you can build them back up. I insult people on this board often, but as a general rule, only for their first week or so, and never personally. I think a little adversity is good for people, and if they can put up with a little shit from me, they will have the confidence to face true vitriol when they recieve it from others. Thats the whole point to hazing, well, that and forced conformity anyway.

I realized a long time ago that it was easy to be right, it was harder to show restraint in favour of getting along with the opposition in spite of it. I think you'll be happier with yourself, your life, and your ideals if you can find similar peace.