what superpowers do you have?

[Spectre X]

in this thread, you take one of your skills, that is comepletely useless in real life, and turn it into a superpower.



mine is the fact that I can throw a rolled up towel with deadly accuracy. in fact, I can split a fly in two at a hundred yards distance. I'm also very skilled in melee combat, in fact, I can take out 100 enemies in 50 seconds, give me two, and you can triple that number in 60 seconds.

[feelevil]

i've seen a lot of posts in my day... but this is by far the worst ever

[Spectre X]

why the hell do you exist?! >:

[The Unseen]

id like to generate smoke from my hands, like that real superhero, monogeist....i think thats right.......

[Spectre X]

no, I mean you take a normally comepletely useless skill you have in real life, and twist it a bit, and turn it into a rediculous superpower, like my towels of DOOM!!!! *que twillight zone music*...Ooooookaaay, erm...



:(

[Mockery]

That's easy.

http://www.funforalltoys.com/products/magic/mystic_smoke/mystic_smoke.html
http://www.johnsonsmith.com/images/P29B.jpg

[kellychaos]

With his face exposed to a radioactive jock-strap thrown viciously in his face by an uncaring football team captain, the formerly scrawny equipment manager soon realized that he was developing amazing locker room skills. Among them are being able to squeeze his whole body into a gym locker and being able to towel-snap a fly into two pieces. Quickly he became the hero of the underdeveloped nerds of his gym class and from that day forward was known as:

<Begin Cheesy Theme Music>

TOWEL BOY!!

[Kaish]

Able to make a perfect plate of nachos and guzzle down gallons of Mountain Dew at one time, Along with the power of memorizing the TV Guide book, He is....


The Mega Slacker lord!

[Spectre X]

emmmmm....no. that's not me. I cannot "towel snap" a fly in two pieces, I throw a towel at it from a maximum distance of 100 yards, and I slice it in two, now don't make me come over there with TWO towels, and kill you and 299 of your buddies. OK?




:lol good thinking though, but that's not me, I l9ve in Holland, and the schools there are diffirent thatn in America.

[Spectre X]

Able to make a perfect plate of nachos and guzzle down gallons of Mountain Dew at one time, Along with the power of memorizing the TV Guide book, He is....


The Mega Slacker lord!


:lol

[Ninjavenom]

i'd like to be able to turn to liquid or control forks telekinetically.

[Matt Harty]

I'd want to be able to become a clone of someone else at will.

[The Retro Kat]

I can mellow anyone out with a joint, then burn them with it....while still being able to save the joint.


I am, The Grim Reefer.

[The Retro Kat]

I also have the power of lying on a frequent basis to fool my enemies into thinking crazy shit. But the above is true, I swear. Or do I. I do. Yes I do.



I am the Lying Bullet. Or am I. Yes I am.



(And yes, the above is true, or is it?)

[Spectre X]

that was funny, or was it. no, it was, or wait, it might not have been, but who can tell.




(I'll give you a hint, I almost laughed myself to death)

(well, not really, but it was funny.)

(or was it?) :(

[Spectre X]

I have the power to stop any attack by throwing myself in front of it.



I am: The Human Shield!


unfortunately, I don't have invulnerability or a healing factor. :(


or:
I have the power to kill everyone in one try, but that really means EVERYBODY! no exceptions, and I can only kill absolutely everybody, so I'd go like "Yeah, I could easily stop that purse-snatcher, but....I really shouldn't you know."

:/

[Les Waste]

I masturbate alot.

I am the HUMAN MASTURBATER

[Godpuppet]

i signed up for an account today, and have no idea what im doing.
im the... incredible n00b

[fear of karma]

My eyelash wishes come true. I know it sounds ridculously fucking hackneyed but a few months ago I wished they would find elizabeth smart and they did. And I also wished that Adrien Brody would win the oscar and he did. also i can put both my feet behind my head.

[Kaish]

in this thread, you take one of your skills, that is comepletely useless in real life, and turn it into a superpower.

My eyelash wishes come true. I know it sounds ridculously fucking hackneyed but a few months ago I wished they would find elizabeth smart and they did. And I also wished that Adrien Brody would win the oscar and he did. also i can put both my feet behind my head.

*Cough*Cough*Guessingisn'tasuperpower*Cough*Cough*

[Captain Robo]

I don't do anything!

I'm TiME WaSTER

[Skulhedface]

I can roll a cigarette back into my mouth on my tongue! BUT I can also roll my eyelids up and roll my eyes backwards! So that makes me...

THE AMAZING CIGARETTE ZOMBIE!

If that doesn't work, I can always be USELESS MOVIE AND MUSIC TRIVIA MAN!

[GnrySgtHartman]

Or the board therapist.

[Skulhedface]

:lol Only in Loveline.

Too bad you didn't say "job" instead of skill, otherwise I would've had a much MUCH better (and cooler!) superpower.

[Wiffles]

I have the skill to watch nothing but anime for a whole week ^ ^;

[Jeanette X]

Mine is that I ask so many questions that I drive my victim insane.

[Black Midnight]

mine is SUPER ANNOYANCE!!!(technically by saying random things as well as interrupting and touching them with random objects.)

see? pokes Jeanette w/ GBA

[hdofu]

I have the amazing ability to piss other people off

[Rongi]

I highly doubt that.

[hdofu]

I highly doubt that.

I'll see how you feel shortly http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/devil/firedevil.gif

[Rongi]

I can tell you'll only be here a few days, make the best of it, pal.

[hdofu]

Heh... Now now kiddo, don't get to worried, I don't scare off so easily. http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/happy/grlaugh.gif

[Wiffles]

I have the power to make everyone happy ^_^

*hugs hdofu*

I just love Millie ^ ^

[Rongi]

Kiddo? I change my mind, you'll be here for about another day :).

[hdofu]

Kiddo? I change my mind, you'll be here for about another day :).

Ahh feel the love http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/happy/supergrin.gif

[Wiffles]

I love hdofu ^ ^
Ozy and Millie is the best ^ ^

[The Retro Kat]

I also have the power to WIGGLES AND HDOFU, YOU'RE BOTH DOUCHES. I HATE YOU! JUST AS RONGI HATES ME, well, and almost everyone else. What am I saying almost.

[Cap'n Crunch]

I have the amazing power to beat SMB1 on NES in under a couple minutes! I can use it to make someone go insane, I think.

[hdofu]

I also have the power to WIGGLES AND HDOFU, YOU'RE BOTH DOUCHES. I HATE YOU! JUST AS RONGI HATES ME, well, and almost everyone else. What am I saying almost.

Love me, hate me, makes no difference to me, Rongi is the better flamer though, but keep practicing and you'll get there http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/biglaugh.gif

[ACAB]

I can hear dog wistles

[The Retro Kat]

Love me, hate me, makes no difference to me, Rongi is the better flamer though, but keep practicing and you'll get there http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/biglaugh.gif


Coming from a guy with little cartoon fox kids on his sig and avatar.

[hdofu]

Love me, hate me, makes no difference to me, Rongi is the better flamer though, but keep practicing and you'll get there http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/biglaugh.gif


Coming from a guy with little cartoon fox kids on his sig and avatar.

Sad for you isn't? http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/happy/wink.gif

[The Retro Kat]

Sad for you isn't?


That makes no grammatical sense, but I'm going to go on a limb and say no.

[hdofu]

Ahh Grammar, me mortal enemy from way back, how goes it?

Grammar: Fuck you hdofu, you ignorant twat. You are a waste of air.

Hmm... that was harsh.

[The Retro Kat]

Ahh Grammar, me mortal enemy from way back, how goes it?

Grammar: Fuck you hdofu, you ignorant twat. You are a waste of air.




Whoever said that was right.

[hdofu]

Grammar: Yes hdofu is a useless twat. what some other friends of mine say about hdofu.
Mathmatics: His exsistence is to give dirt something to look down on.
Logic: That prick really should die.
Spelling: We don't know eachother but he seems to be retarded or something.

[Wiffles]

It makes me sad when people fight >_<

[The Retro Kat]

It makes me happy throwing hamsters against walls.

[Wiffles]

No! Not the innocent hamsters >_<
What have they ever done to you? ;_;

[hdofu]

No! Not the innocent hamsters >_<
What have they ever done to you? ;_;

Some towels just get angry when they smoke too much weed. That anger leads them to say aggresive things.

[Wiffles]

I hate weed, it smells bad >_<

[CastroMotorOil]

weed = happiness

[Spectre X]

Retrokat being a towel makes him my sidekick, who I can use when I'm out of towels.


I am: The Amazing Towel Ninja!!!

[The Retro Kat]

Some towels just get angry when they smoke too much weed. That anger leads them to say aggresive things.

Weed makes you mellow, Cheif.


And I shant be anyone's sidekick, god dammit.


I am THE SOLO SMOKING TOWEL.

[Spectre X]

I'm: The Amazing Towel Ninja and you WILL obey.



:domo :obey :hypno :hypno :obey :domo

[kellychaos]

No! Not the innocent hamsters >_<
What have they ever done to you? ;_;

Innocent hamsters don't crawl up your ass and run around like a three year old at Chuckie Cheese >: ... I heard some things :/ ... Just sayin' :)

[Professor Cool]

I have the power to shun people

Here's A List Now:

esuohlim
Matt Harty
Cynical Dave
Fartin Martin Fowler Mowler???

and our newest shunnie, Wiffles, cause your name annoys me >:

http://www.findingjoy.com/images/angry.jpgSHUNNEDhttp://www.findingjoy.com/images/angry.jpg

[kellychaos]

I posses the power to be mocked. I trump you all from the top of my problem dandruff hair down to my oddly left-thrusting genetalia. Just when your ROTFLYAO at my shortcomings is when I impail your eye sockets with my "Calvin & Hobbes Fan Club" pen.

[Professor Cool]

Calvin And Hobbes Was Cancelled

Foxtrot and B.C. are next

Long live the Boondocks

[Professor Cool]

Calvin And Hobbes Was Cancelled

Foxtrot and B.C. are next

[Jeanette X]

I miss Peanuts most of all. Rest In Peace Charles M. Schultz. :tear

[GADZOOKS]

I got the power of http://www.cherbearsden.com/images/joshb/jesus.jpg and http://www.soapworks.com/images/bleach.jpg

[The Unseen]

I have the power of RACISM!!!

[GADZOOKS]

Black Leperchauns dont drink coffee you ass >:

[The Retro Kat]

I'm: The Amazing Towel Ninja and you WILL obey.



I will not. I am the DISOBEDIENT SNAPPING TOWEL OF FUCKING QUEER BAG ASSHOLES!

[kellychaos]

Calvin And Hobbes Was Cancelled

Foxtrot and B.C. are next

Long live the Boondocks

BLASPHEMER!! INFIDEL!! KILL THE MESSENGER!

[Dixie]

i have the power to bleed profusely

[n00bward]

I have the power to drink quantities of alchohol that would kill a normal human.

[Captain Robo]

You people sure like towels

[The Retro Kat]

Its just the fact that Spectre is a dumbfuck.

[Skulhedface]

I have the power to drink quantities of alchohol that would kill a normal human.

So did Andre the Giant... I heard he could drink almost 120 beers in one sitting!

[Spectre X]

Its just the fact that Spectre is a dumbfuck.

don't make me rig your joints and bongs so that they shoot a big ball of barbed wire into your face whenever you smoke them >:

[The Retro Kat]

Yes, because you know how inconspicuos barbed wire on joints and bongs are.

[kellychaos]

Yes, because you know how inconspicuos barbed wire on joints and bongs are.

Better to be a "towel" than a "tool" like Spectre, eh Retro? :)

[The Retro Kat]

Damn tootin', or should I say damn token'?

Oh, I crack my self the fuck up.

[Captain Robo]

I REMEMBERED THIS THREAD, AND THEN I REMEMBERED THAT THIS SORT OF THING HAS BEEN DONE BEFORE.

[Rev. Danno]

Wow, I Just wasted 20 min. of my life reading this crap.
There should be a warning on these things...

[sadie]

^^^ my exact thoughts. :(