My extremely pitiful adventure

[Les Waste]

So last Thursday the electric company shut off my power. Now I didn't know they shut it off, since I had paid the bill only like two months ago so it wasn't that long, and I thought it was just a blackout on account of all the construction going on outside. But after consulting my most recent bill I discovered that my last payment two months ago did not work. This is most likely due to the fact that I paid my last bill whilst very drunk, and probably wrote the check to the wrong person, or to an imaginary amount, or possibly I forgot the check altogether.

They wanted me to pay the whole bill at once to get the power on, so after finally figuring out how my unemployed ass could pony up such a large amount, I called to pay immediately so my power would come back. But of course, I was told that they didn't have anyone left working that Friday who could come turn the power on, so I had to wait until Monday.

A whole weekend without electricity really fucking sucked. The days weren't too bad, since I could just read by a window or something to pass the time. But during the night times I had to go to the house of whichever friend or close acquaintace of mine was home and drink copious amounts of alcohol so that I could go home to my pitch-black apartment and pass out, because the sooner I left the world of the conscious, the sooner I could wake up and harnass the power of the flaming sky ball to see where I was pissing.

Goddammit >:

[EVILCAKE]

I remember when you used to attack me, it seems fitting that you have become a loser and a drunk :)

[Les Waste]

Who the fuck are you supposed to be?

[EVILCAKE]

don't you remember? I named the child after you :(

[Les Waste]

Sit and spin, creator of generic humor-based forum posts >:

I ain't got time for shenanigans >:

[The Eliminator]

That sucks, did you had to pay extra for being reconnected?

[Les Waste]

yeah there were like three fees and they totalled an extra 40 bucks >:

As if trying trying to take a dump by candle light for three days wasn't punishment enough

[Misdemonar]

You can play hide and go seek well without power.

[EVILCAKE]

you told me that the power was out and we needed to rub are bodies together to keep warm, when are you sending money for the baby?

[The Eliminator]

When hell freezes over!?

[Chojin]

whyever is your signature so upset with me.

[Chojin]

i mean, it's stuff like that that makes me want to change your avatar, too.

[The Eliminator]

Oh joy, a nazi mod. Eveyone loves a nazi mod.

Keep on rocking \m/

Next time inform me what the rules of avatars and sigs are.

[Chojin]

Next time read the rules (http://www.i-mockery.net/viewtopic.php?t=20883), you (http://www.i-mockery.net/viewtopic.php?t=20883) fucking twat (http://www.i-mockery.net/viewtopic.php?t=20883).

[The Eliminator]

K, i will, fuckwit.

[Chojin]

oh yeah oh yeah well you are a bonafide fucktard CAN YOU BELIEVE I WENT THERE OH OH HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES

HOW!

DO!

YOU!

LIKE-

You know, you should send a nasty PM to Mockery, he'll probably strip me of mod status immediately and hold a parade in your honor. Maybe even SIMULTANEOUSLY.

[Chojin]

do you, by any chance, fence?

[Chojin]

am i distracting you from reading the rules?

i hope i'm not distracting you from reading the rules.

cause that happened once to this other guy.

when i distracted him.

from reading the rules.


and then he didn't know them.


being distracted and all.

[The Eliminator]

That where some cool posts, yeah, did not made sense tho.

W00t, large letters.

Damn, a mod who is derailing a thread.

Nice.

*thumbs up*

[Chojin]

was that a joke

because i get jokes



find me a joke and i'll get it.

[Chojin]

there is also some mutual confusion here - i am not familiar with the term 'derailing' is that some furcadia slang or something i'm woefully backlogged on my internets.

[Gurlugon]

The Elimanator is such a Fury warrior.

[Chojin]

oh i see that was sarcasm good show old man haha but just an fyi we don't use asterisks here, we prefer tags i've been meaning to add that to the rules forever but things just pile up and

http://www.i-mockery.net/mockwar2k5/images/alifight.jpg

BOOM! HAHA! OUT OF NOWHERE! OH MAN, OH MAN YOU WALKED RIGHT INTO THAT A BLIND MAN COULD HAVE SEEN IT COMING WHAT'S WITH YOU MAN [emote] laughs heartily

[The Eliminator]

The Elimanator is such a Fury warrior.

Er? Fury? WTF are you talking about poofter?

[Chojin]

oh shit. oh shit, i'm looking that up. you're so dead. SO dead.

[Pub Lover]

do you, by any chance, fence?
ANSWER THE QUESTION! (http://www.geocities.com/pubicpublover/rod/fofanswr.wav)

[The Eliminator]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v13/juicejfs/OK/660348.jpg

*rolling eyes* <--- hee, look mom, i've used asterisks!!!

[Chojin]

okay man i looked up poofter and i'm coming up with NOTHING you could always try to spellcheck your stuff before you post it :rolleyes if you still don't believe me, here's your proof:

http://www.i-mockery.com/chojin/poofterali.jpg

BOOM! OH! OH, OH GOD! GOD! YOU FELL FOR IT AGAIN! HAHAHA YOU'RE KILLING ME, MAN, IT'S LIKE THE OLDEST TRICK IN THE BOOK!

[The Eliminator]

Oh no, the spelling police is on me.........RUN!!!!

Twit!

[Chojin]

Did you mean Poitier (http://www.i-mockery.net/mockwar2k5/images/alifight.jpg)?

[Chojin]

Anyway, notwithstanding the comments of a certain off-topic jerk-butt-face-homo...

BG&E are queer about power like that ;< I didn't pay them for a while cause they never billed me and then it cost me hundreds to get it back on and they didn't do it for a full week on account of them not feeling like it.

[The Eliminator]

Anyway, notwithstanding the comments of a certain off-topic jerk-butt-face-homo...



You where the one who made it off topic.......remmember? Korsakov boy?

[sadie]

http://www.i-mockery.net/mockwar2k5/images/alifight.jpg
one of my editors last year photoshopped this picture with chattering teeth over ali's and whoever else's faces 'cause the newspaper's called "the chatterbox." get it? :(

oh, and bobo, i feel your pain. i spent two weeks without electricity (i think it was) three summers ago 'cause i had no job (except being a professional musician, which in my town, is open mics at biker bars three nights a week and a non-paying gig in a city fifty miles away once a week to get-a-foot-in-the-door) and refused to ask my parents for help. i remember lying on my bed with the window open when the old lady next door was entertaining a guest on the carport and telling her about the burger she bit into and then found half a roach in. i was trying to read the nirvana story someone'd sent me. good luck getting it together, man.

[Chojin]

Esophagator, Will you PLEASE stop being so off-topic! Don't make me PM an administrator, it is clearly against the rules!

[The Eliminator]

Esophagator, Will you PLEASE stop being so off-topic! Don't make me PM an administrator, it is clearly against the rules!

Oh, i'm so sorry, Please forgive me, I'll never do it again!

Pot, kettle, black.

[sadie]

eliminate somewhere else, please. i just cleaned this carpet.

[Chojin]

Okay, that is it, that is IT! Don't say I didn't warn you!

From: Chojin
To: Mockery
Posted: Mon Aug 21, 2006 10:18 pm
Subject: EXTREMELY disruptive behavior!

Excuse me -RoG-, (by the way, love the site!) but a certain user named The Eliminator is causing a massive disturbance in General Blabber. Believe me, you'll know the thread when you see it. I don't think I need to tell you what to do here, but I'm figuring about 4-6 years on the ban, how's my aim?

Yours forever,
Chojin

[The Eliminator]

eliminate somewhere else, please. i just cleaned this carpet.

I understand.......don't rock your boat........and if so!!!!.......call it........?????

I do not know how to get blood stains out of your carpet, sorry. :(

[sadie]

you really should see a doctor about that.

[The Eliminator]

Okay, that is it, that is IT! Don't say I didn't warn you!

From: Chojin
To: Mockery
Posted: Mon Aug 21, 2006 10:18 pm
Subject: EXTREMELY disruptive behavior!

Excuse me -RoG-, (by the way, love the site!) but a certain user named The Eliminator is causing a massive disturbance in General Blabber. Believe me, you'll know the thread when you see it. I don't think I need to tell you what to do here, but I'm figuring about 4-6 years on the ban, how's my aim?

Yours forever,
Chojin

Whoo, cool, i'm shacking, you are so cool.

Feck, can i have your autograph?

Edit: They call this mockery? when they have tight arse people around.......like.........?

[Chojin]

Guys just IGNORE HIM he'll be banned before you know it I sent that PM express did you know i've known roger for years it's true we built that redline together for situations just like this so sit tight

[sadie]

stop shacking!

[The Eliminator]

Everyone ignored me except you. You want my love or something?

C'mon, just tell me.

[MLE]

"lol"

[EVILCAKE]

can someone unban me? I was sorta on topic...I gotta go to work and pay the bills...pay the bills....pay the bills :hypno

[WhiteRat]

Judging from the Eliminator's layed out body, I must say that he was BOOMED by Chojin.

[Snakes_On_A_Thread]

Incase you didn't know, poofter is English slang for 'homosexual'. :themoreyouknow

[CSM-101]

oh i see that was sarcasm good show old man haha but just an fyi we don't use asterisks here, we prefer tags i've been meaning to add that to the rules forever but things just pile up and

http://www.i-mockery.net/mockwar2k5/images/alifight.jpg

BOOM! HAHA! OUT OF NOWHERE! OH MAN, OH MAN YOU WALKED RIGHT INTO THAT A BLIND MAN COULD HAVE SEEN IT COMING WHAT'S WITH YOU MAN [emote] laughs heartily

this picture gets old.

[Trash]

Juust like you.

[ArrowX]

Hey guys I found Jesus!

[Les Waste]

Eliminator, you do not have to respond to every single goddamn post made in your general direction. Aside from the fact that you are gaying up my already gay-beyound-comparision thread about how I'm an alcoholic pill-popper, your poor attempts at comedy are rendered even more moot because your humor is being dilluted by the twenty-some posts in this thread that amount to little more than "oh yeah RIGHT, THAT'LL happen rolleyes." You fucking don't have to demonstrate to the internet that you have a sense of humor; it's not like the writing staff at Conan or South Park or SNL or what the fuck ever is going to "discover" you through this forum and make you the next Chris Farley, John Belushi, Lenny Bruce or, again, what the fuck ever. Stop trying to convince people you don't fucking suck, dickweed. >:

Also, thank you Sadie for reassuring me that I am not the complete loser which my close friends assured me I am for being powerless; I knew other people had such experiences, I just didn't know any people who did :(