CAP: Christian Analysis of American Culture

[Fathom Zero]

Movie reviews 4 Jesus:

http://www.capalert.com/capreports/index.htm

It's excellent stuff. Really.

[Trash]

I beleive this is the 4th time somebody sends this.

[WhiteRat]

Trash, you are one bitter mother fucker.

[Grislygus]

Please read the listing in the Findings/Scoring section be your guide whether this flick is worth your time and money. To discuss the plot/story would be pointless.
Do not think. Obey. Entertainment is the Devil's Work. Do not be swayed by actual story content.


Black Hawk Down Review:
"My WWII veteran dad told me of a time when duty and compliance with orders..."

MY DADDY TOLD ME THAT SOLDIERS USED TO ACT LIKE SOLDIERS UNTIL SATAN SENT THE GAY PEOPLE.

[liquidstatik]

http://www.capalert.com/backtoschool/backtoschool.htm :[

[Trash]

The symbol is also used by some to make a sexual statement of "69" which I will not discuss any further

:lol

[executioneer]

i would really love it if there was a parody of this website, detailing how much "jesus crap" there was in a movie :x

[liquidstatik]

i wouldnt mind making one, cause this site makes me angry. :(

but, i don't have the time to review a kajillion movies. :(

[Grislygus]

http://www.capalert.com/images/eye.gif
EVIL EYE or MAL OCCHIO: Found on US currency, this symbol portrays those who claim to be chosen by Satan to control world finances.

WTF?

[executioneer]

i think they mean the jews :x

[Grislygus]

Oh, right, right. The Jew/Borg economy hive mind.

[executioneer]

i don't really get why they felt the need to review Sin City, i mean it's fucking got SIN in the TITLE, are jesus people really so dense as to think it'd be a great movie for their kids to watch? :rolleyes

matter of fact, wouldn't an R rating pretty much preclude any christ clapper from watching a movie at all? why not start reviewing porno movies and saying how bad THOSE are against god :rolleyes

[Trash]

Holy Jesus Fucknut, a Clockworck Orange got a better rating than the remake of the Fog.

[Fathom Zero]

That's really fucked up. I didn't even see that.

[Fathom Zero]

The worst movie is Payback and the second worst is the Faculty.

[pjalne]

It's kinda funny that the lowest-scoring movie has Mel Gibson in it.

Also, haha.

http://www.capalert.com/images/TCPict%20in%20Frame131x162.jpg

[executioneer]

fathom zero i don't know what you're getting at by "worst movie" but american psycho, freddy vs jason, scary movie and sin city all got "score: 0" whereas faculty and payback both are just in the teens

also, i think the "CAP ID" might actually be a better indicator of movies they think are "dangerous", in which case i think exorcism of emily rose, south park BLU and "Whipped" are the "worst"

[Esuohlim]

If you send him emails full of vulgarity and name-calling, he'll respond by saying he'll pray for you and then he'll block your email.

BUT if you send him emails that question his intentions and provide well thought-out persuasive cases against everything he believes in, he'll IGNORE THEM. >:

So if you want to email him then be a jerk because you'll get a response back that way.

[Bell E. Laffs]

Yeah, what the fuck do you know?