Lots of hot girls come into Starbucks..

[BlueOatmeal]

..and my shift manager hates it when I don't hit on them. :(

[MattJack]

What is his method of picking up chicks at work?

[noob3]

yo who would hit on chicks who spend money on coffee that shit is weak man i only hit on chicks that drink water cuz if they drink too much coffee theyre pussy smells like beans

[Sacks]

You don't meet nice girls in coffee shops.

[Grandpa Jones]

Caffiene is a drug!

[Sacks]

Go to hell you old bastard.

[MattJack]

if they drink too much coffee theyre pussy smells like beans

:lol


I generally never hit on customers when I worked jobs like those. I mean, if they started flirting with me and they were attractive I guess I could see it happening. I wouldn't try and get my mack on in a fast food/food job uniform.

Tell your boss you're queer.

[Misdemonar]

MATTJACK YOU ARE STUPID AND YOU CAN NEVER RUN AWAY FROM THAT.

[MetalMilitia]

You could be all smooth say things like "that'll be $3.50 AND YOUR PHONE NUMBER!" then they'll give it to you because you were so cool about it.

[Sacks]

You know that would probably work if he was skeezin' on teenagers.

[MetalMilitia]

I fail to see a problem here.

[Sacks]

No problem just sayin'.

[MattJack]

MATTJACK YOU ARE STUPID AND YOU CAN NEVER RUN AWAY FROM THAT.

oh noes! The truth is killing me from the inside.

Did I hurt your wittle feewings? Do you hit on girls in your wittle fast food uniform? Awwwwww him so cuteeeeeee.

[Terra]

um midemoner is into ...boys.

but..shhhhhh..that is our little secret

[MattJack]

sorry, I thought it was a 14 year old boy.

Let me try again:

AAAWWWWWWWW did someone get herr wittle feewings huurt? Did someone meet her frisco dyke lover at Denny'ssssss? Awwww yesh she did! YESH SHE DID! AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

[Terra]

this lil' cajun fucker is hot.

[Sam]

YOU CAN DO IT BLUEOATMEAL I HAVE FAITH IN YOU! :)

[Matt Harty]

..and my shift manager hates it when I don't hit on them. :(

you show those girls whos boss!

[MarioRPG]

Brag that you work where they eat.

[BlueOatmeal]

Oh snap guys! I closed drive-thru Sunday and all these fine ladies kept coming so I was chatting up a storm, eating pretzels with a carload of girls and giggling like an asshole. My shift was all like "Fucking right Larry!"

[Matt Harty]

and then you woke up :(

[Pudty]

Know what I hate? The fucking pretentious bitches who order thier dapalapafrappachino and then proceed to sip thier 600 calorie "coffee" while reading the newest issue of some hip, up to date, trendy magazine, giving everyone the preception that they know something that everyone else doesn't, the go home and write a book and how original and trendy they are.

[Pudty]

Thats the kindof woman i just want to beat the shit out of, ya know?

[GADZOOKS]

woah! I didn't know Dane Cook was on this message board.

[kon]

I H8 THIS THREAD

[MattJack]

pudty u crack me up. Can I have some more of your humor for freeeeee?


GEEEEE

[Womti]

PUDTY IS HILARIOUS.

[Pudty]

woah! I didn't know Dane Cook was on this message board.

Woah! I didn't know nearly every single person on this message board was a tool!

[executioneer]

at least tools are useful for something burn

[Matt Harty]

don't worry pudty its all part of the hazing ritual once you hit 100 posts it'll all be over! i've got an idea make a thread in a forum nobody views that much and post a bunch of times till you hit 100! and then you'll be part of the gang.

[Sacks]

at least tools are useful for something burn

Haw haw! SICK BURN! :rock:rock:rock:rock PUDTY IS FINISHED!

[Pudty]

executioneer, chong and matt gay called and they want you to suck their dick more. Buuuuuuurn

[MattJack]

executioneer, chong and matt gay called and they want you to suck their dick more. Buuuuuuurn

Matt Harty, I wouldn't let no punk bitch talk down to me like that. Shit.

[morbidoranges]

I H8 THIS THREAD

don't worry kid, it hates you too.

[Matt Harty]

Matt Harty, I wouldn't let no punk bitch talk down to me like that. Shit.

i really have no idea what he said

[MrAdventure]

I'M W/ KON THIS THREAD IS A WRECK

[BlueOatmeal]

Man. What the fuck?

[Matt Harty]

SORRY BLUEOATMEAL I PROMISE I CARE ABOUT YOU HAVING NO CONTACT WITH FEMALES AT YOUR JOB

[Lenor]

The 100 post count is bullshit..

MorbidOranges, sweetie I wouldn't count your blessings so early, your a newb on this board.

We should bring back some of the old school spirit back and show these new little fucker's what it was like. :eek

[Girl Drink Drunk]

The 100 post count is bullshit..

MorbidOranges, sweetie I wouldn't count your blessings so early, your a newb on this board.

We should bring back some of the old school spirit back and show these new little fucker's what it was like. :eek

Lenor, your status as a an "oldschool" status as an I-Mockery member is the equivalent that of Bucky.

[BlueOatmeal]

Holy fuck. We got this new hot girl working at Starbucks and every time I work with her I gets me a nice chubby going on.

[MattJack]

lol that's terrible! Women have feelings and thoughts too.

So she got junk in the trunk or what?

[BlueOatmeal]

Shes petite. Not like 5 year old petite but not really huge "assets"

[MattJack]

Oh I dated a girl like that for about, I dunno, 4 seconds, and I felt like I could crush her with my bare arms/hands.

I was always making her order desert and I was always chasing her around with cake/pizza/lard. She was stupid anyways :(.

She says to me one day,
"Yea I think my brake light on my car is out, it won't come on when I brake."

"Yea, it sounds like it's out. It could just be out of brake light fluid though."

So she goes home and asks her dad where she can get "Brake Light Fluid." You know, so her brake light will come on again.

[Lenor]

I think he was making a reference toward her TanA.

[MattJack]

oh, well either way it still isn't any good. So she looks like a 2X4? no bueno mi amigo

[Lenor]

:lol @ Matt

:/ Everyone is BEAUTIFUL, just how they are!

[MattJack]

Then why do I drink so much at the club?

[kahljorn]

the joke is that there's no such thing as brake light fluid, right?

[MattJack]

yea man. It's a bulb. Are there any lights that require a liquid to work or produce power?