View Full Version : THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE
Jixby Phillips
Jul 7th, 2003, 06:00 PM
1. Crash my car through a hotel lobby and get out and ask "where are all the whores at!"
2. Go to hooters and double take when I see the waitress and mispronounce words when I order
3. Chase a secretary around a desk untill she shouts "I'm not that kind of secretary!!"
4. Do something so weird and crazy that it makes a wino throw away his bottle of booze.
5. Pose as a doctor and give breast examinations at a High School or College.
6. Invent a cuss
7. Nintendo Nintendo Nintendo!
noob3
Jul 7th, 2003, 06:08 PM
That's a whole lot of stuff to do!
Rev. Danno
Jul 7th, 2003, 07:36 PM
1. Jump over a shark
2. Jump by bike over 12 hobos
3. your mother
4. Write a funny mini-mock that gets posted
(Wally Cruton is funny yet my review on childrens water toys isn't?)
5. Meet a few people from I-mockery that don't suck, or continue to post...
6. Sell my cook books...
7. Be in the Guinnes book for somthing cool...
8. guest voice on a cartoon
9. Be the Caterer on a cool Zombie movie
10. Bitch slap someone on this board who annoys me...
kahljorn
Jul 7th, 2003, 08:16 PM
1. Get hit by a train
FartinMowler
Jul 7th, 2003, 11:00 PM
1. drive the train the hits kahljorn
2. Take Rongi's cat for a vacation to China
3. brush Jixby's teeth
Protoclown
Jul 7th, 2003, 11:01 PM
1. Buy Reverend Danno's comic books
2. See kahljorn get hit by a train
Rev. Danno
Jul 7th, 2003, 11:11 PM
1. Figure out how the hell knew about my comic book collection...
2. Film the train hitting kahljorn, so all may see...
3. Make sweet love to Rog, & all the "jins" at the same time...
Esuohlim
Jul 7th, 2003, 11:14 PM
1. Read about kahljorn getting hit by a train in the papers.
2. Have a funeral :lol
Protoclown
Jul 7th, 2003, 11:22 PM
1. learn to read (i thought "cook books" was "comic books")
Cap'n Crunch
Jul 7th, 2003, 11:31 PM
1. Take the money out of kahljorn's wallet after he gets hit by a train.
kahljorn
Jul 7th, 2003, 11:42 PM
1. Put anthrax in my wallet the day I die.
2. strap a bomb with a high yield on for train sploding
3. Give out free cookies to news stands all across the world
4. get hit by a train
Spooky
Jul 8th, 2003, 12:22 AM
JIXBY DIDNT SAY "POST WHAT YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE. >: >: >: >:
kahljorn
Jul 8th, 2003, 01:43 AM
Then I want Jixby to get hit by a car before he dies :\
Ninjavenom
Jul 8th, 2003, 02:02 AM
1. Pee off of a building
2. Ensure that said building happens to be Mockery's workplace
3.Time aforementioned stratospheric urination to coincide with the exact timing of Mockery's arrival at said workplace
4. Eat sushi
Schimid
Jul 8th, 2003, 02:42 AM
4. Do something so weird and crazy that it makes a wino throw away his bottle of booze.
I think that was the funniest thing I've ever read on this site. :(
executioneer
Jul 8th, 2003, 04:18 AM
yeah :( he'd probably do a spit-take and look at it in disbelief first :(
-willie
Jixby Phillips
Jul 8th, 2003, 04:42 AM
And rub his eyeballs :(
glowbelly
Jul 8th, 2003, 06:11 AM
and shave his testicles :(
executioneer
Jul 8th, 2003, 06:38 AM
And piss up a rope :eek
-willie
kellychaos
Jul 8th, 2003, 09:55 AM
http://www.gdarkness.com/4degrees/avery_wolf.gif
Les Waste
Jul 8th, 2003, 10:20 AM
and say "WHA WHA WHAAAAAAAT?!?!?!?!?!"
whoreable
Jul 8th, 2003, 10:26 AM
I want to make a rich person drop their monacle in a wine glass and exclaim "Why I never!"
jin
Jul 8th, 2003, 10:33 AM
I want to kill the entire planet.
:(
kellychaos
Jul 8th, 2003, 10:34 AM
How drole, you cad!
Protoclown
Jul 8th, 2003, 12:12 PM
1. Laugh at one of kellychaos's jokes
Geggy
Jul 8th, 2003, 12:48 PM
1. snort in wassabi sauce through my nose
2. get drunk at kahl's funeral and start a mosh pit
3. bitch slap george lucas for ruining star wars
Hobo Renee
Jul 8th, 2003, 03:29 PM
1. Have sex on Divine's grave and have John Waters walk up to me and say "Hey you crazy kids! Lets make smores." and then do the Zap! thing from the Simpsons.
2. Get hired as a waitress at Hooters and then gain a lot of weight before my first day of work.
3. Have a bunch of kids and yell "It's pudding time!"...a lot (note: I ripped this off from a friend, but I think it's noteworthy.)
4. Move the Northwest and complain about how happy I am.
5. Have more ideas...
Rongi
Jul 8th, 2003, 05:03 PM
4. Eat sushi
I can not beleive you've never eaten sushi. It's better then sex >:
:(
1. Start a mob of a punch of pussies :(
The One and Only...
Jul 8th, 2003, 08:30 PM
1. Develop a guitar that sounds like the various tunes of a chainsaw.
2. Push a lot of very important buttons, having no idea what I'm doing. Preferably buttons that operate nukes.
3. Meet a schitzophrenic whose multiply personalities are schitzophrenics.
4. Take away Ninjavenom's sushi before he can eat it.
5. Cause a cutural revolution.
6. Fill up a watergun with my piss and shoot people with it.
kahljorn
Jul 8th, 2003, 08:33 PM
1. laugh at one of protoclowns jokes... accomplished.
Esuohlim
Jul 8th, 2003, 08:33 PM
6. Fill up a watergun with my piss and shoot people with it.
One of my friend's did that at a party when I was, like, 10. We are all "THAT'S GAH-ROSS :x"
Alpha Nerd
Jul 8th, 2003, 11:29 PM
1. Build a house
2. Paint a picture
3. I don't Know
The Retro Kat
Jul 8th, 2003, 11:36 PM
1. Get 7 more blowjobs.
2. Get 7 more fucks.
3. Get 7 the movie.
4. Walk around naked for a whole week.
5. Jack off to the accindent with the train involving kahl.
6. Severly beat the shit out of the noob, Mike.
CaptainBubba
Jul 9th, 2003, 01:21 AM
1. Break a beer bottle IN ANGER. >:
2. Take a bullet for someone.
3. Perform the Angry Dragon ( Get a blowjob, then at the moment of ejaculation punch the girl/boy in the stomache, causing a regurgitation which will shoot the sperm into the victims nasal cavity causing hot sticky gizz to come out of said victims nose)
4. Give a girl a necklace I've been saving since I was 12 and have her get all emotional about it then watch Strangers with Candy/ Family Guy on DVD and eat Kettle popcorn (Best possible date ever).
5. Punch a televangelist in the face screaming "HEAL" every time I hit him.
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