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View Full Version : Theosophical Ass Scratcher


slavemason
Feb 10th, 2003, 12:23 PM
If man was made in God's image, does God have to wipe his/her ass after shitting?
This Revelation came to me while walking the dog.

Helm
Feb 10th, 2003, 04:21 PM
If you were made in God's image, does that mean that God is fucking dumbass?

slavemason
Feb 10th, 2003, 08:54 PM
NOW you're starting to get the idea. One gold star for Helm!

CaptainBubba
Feb 10th, 2003, 09:02 PM
Gods fecal waste is immaculate and as soft and swiftly moving as the western wind.

The rectum of the lord needs not be cleansed with earthly sheets of two-ply bark!

Our father in heaven is too busy masturbating.

sadie
Feb 11th, 2003, 04:49 AM
and maybe a little ugly on the side.

Systemz
Feb 11th, 2003, 02:49 PM
Can you imagine what God's semen would go for retail? We'd have little test-tube jesuses popping up all over - healing Lepers, throwing moneylenders out of temples - they'd probably form their own street gang a-la West Side Story. And the choreography! Immaculate.

slavemason
Feb 12th, 2003, 12:41 PM
I have to agree that the choreography would be pretty supernatural. I'm sure Lionel Richie would kill himself after witnessing such moves.

Systemz
Feb 12th, 2003, 01:30 PM
I just saw Chicago. Now that movie's got some choreography (and shiny outfits). If Jesus was alive today, what would he wear? I think Jesus is the sort of guy who buys sale items from exclusive designers from places like Thailand and Egypt.

slavemason
Feb 12th, 2003, 08:33 PM
Surveying the churches in my area, it looks like Jesus is torn between Tommy Hilfiger and Fubu garb.