I-Mock Member Deaths

[The Retro Kat]

TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Esuohlim
You will die on: Thursday, October 28, 2027
You will die of: Blood Clot

TyrantOfTheAnts: :'(
Super Retro Guy: thats young
TyrantOfTheAnts: i think it will and to do with those Triple chesseburgers o always had
Super Retro Guy: youll die before my 40ith birthday
Super Retro Guy: or those mushroom melts at wendy's
TyrantOfTheAnts: i combined two together, and make it a sextupal sandwhich
TyrantOfTheAnts: i like it because it has SEX in it
Super Retro Guy: i was just going to say that
Super Retro Guy: do you have ecp?
TyrantOfTheAnts: i have espn
TyrantOfTheAnts: and espn 2
Super Retro Guy: but no extreme clit problems?
TyrantOfTheAnts: guess what retro jerk
Super Retro Guy: youre one of the lucky ones
Super Retro Guy: what
TyrantOfTheAnts: YOU WONT SEE YOUR 40th b-day
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: The Retro Kat
You will die on: Wednesday, June 5, 2024
You will die of: Deleted from the Matrix

TyrantOfTheAnts: LOL!
TyrantOfTheAnts: who should i look up next!
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: -ROG-
You will die on: Saturday, June 4, 2016
You will die of: Stabbing

Super Retro Guy: cojin
Super Retro Guy: he might live to his 40th
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: chojin
You will die on: Thursday, July 19, 2035
You will die of: Exsanguination

TyrantOfTheAnts: !
Super Retro Guy: wow, i would have never seen that coming
TyrantOfTheAnts: MORE NAMES
Super Retro Guy: ill go down the last post in love line
Super Retro Guy: perndog
TyrantOfTheAnts: OH NO
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Professor Cool
You will die on: Thursday, June 3, 2010
You will die of: Didn't wait 30 minutes before swimming

Super Retro Guy: no!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TyrantOfTheAnts: TyrantOfTheAnts: Hey your gonna die in 2010
Crowonthesol: http://www.i-mockery.net/images/emoticons/picklehat.gif
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: perndog
You will die on: Tuesday, May 13, 2031
You will die of: Stabbing

Super Retro Guy: good
TyrantOfTheAnts: MORE NAMES
TyrantOfTheAnts: post this hilarious stuff up

TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Rongi
You will die on: Saturday, July 25, 2020
You will die of: Stroke

Super Retro Guy: kellychaos
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: kellychaos
You will die on: Saturday, October 30, 2032
You will die of: Electrocution

Super Retro Guy: whoreable
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: whoreable
You will die on: Wednesday, July 27, 2033
You will die of: Ritual Sacrifice

Super Retro Guy: fat satan
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Fat Satan
You will die on: Thursday, May 2, 2024
You will die of: Food Poisoning

Super Retro Guy: captain bubba
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: captain bubba
You will die on: Saturday, April 29, 2023
You will die of: Gingivitis

Super Retro Guy: KILLADEUCE
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: KILLADEUCE
You will die on: Tuesday, August 6, 2030
You will die of: Fall Down Stairs

Super Retro Guy: smoke66
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: smoke666
You will die on: Thursday, January 14, 2038
You will die of: Lung Cancer

Super Retro Guy: James
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: James
You will die on: Thursday, March 1, 2018
You will die of: Gingivitis

Super Retro Guy: jin
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: jin
You will die on: Thursday, October 23, 2014
You will die of: Gunshot

Super Retro Guy: Blue Oatmeal
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Blue Oatmeal
You will die on: Thursday, January 20, 2033
You will die of: Heart Disease (High Blood Pressure)

Super Retro Guy: ProtoClown
TyrantOfTheAnts: this has to be the best one yet
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: ProtoClown
You will die on: Thursday, July 24, 2031
You will die of: Sexually Transmitted Disease
TyrantOfTheAnts: HE WONT BE A VIRGIN!
Super Retro Guy: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Super Retro Guy: good for him

TyrantOfTheAnts: any more names
Super Retro Guy: noob3
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: noob3
You will die on: Thursday, January 24, 2030
You will die of: Drug Overdose

Super Retro Guy: Les Waste
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Les Waste
You will die on: Saturday, October 9, 2027
You will die of: Fall Down Stairs

Super Retro Guy: AChimp
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: AChimp
You will die on: Tuesday, March 10, 2026
You will die of: Burned to Death


Super Retro Guy: Max Burbank
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Max Burbank
You will die on: Thursday, June 29, 2028
You will die of: Shot to death

Super Retro Guy: Jeanette X
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Jeanette X
You will die on: Thursday, July 26, 2029
You will die of: Mauled by animal

[Ninjavenom]

Fucker >:

[AChimp]

Burninated. :(

[The Retro Kat]

TyrantOfTheAnts: we forgot Ninja Venom
Super Retro Guy: Ninjavenom
TyrantOfTheAnts: and Jixby
Super Retro Guy: quick
TyrantOfTheAnts: WE FORGOT JIXBY
Super Retro Guy: and glowbelly
Super Retro Guy: oh shit
Super Retro Guy: and ziggy trix
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: ninjavenom
You will die on: Thursday, April 19, 2029
You will die of: Drive-By Shooting
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Jixby Phillips
You will die on: Sunday, March 25, 2012
You will die of: Slipped on Ice
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: glowbelly
You will die on: Thursday, April 25, 2030
You will die of: Skin Cancer
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Ziggy
You will die on: Saturday, May 19, 2029
You will die of: Snake Bite

[NIGhtMAre]

haha. I wasn't in that >:

[The Retro Kat]

That's because you fucking suck.

[Ninjavenom]

awww yeaaaaah. 8-)

[Perndog]

:bestthread

:lol - "Exsanguination.." :faint

I get to be almost 50! :)

[UtterParadox]

Apparently, I'm not important enough to be preordained.

[Professor Cool]

Im gonna be the first to die!

[AChimp]

UtterParadox
Friday, August 29, 2003
Anal rippage

>:

[CaptainBubba]

UTTER: THATS RIGHT. YOU ARENT. STOP RUINING GOOD THREADS YOU DIRTY JEWBALL. >:

[The Retro Kat]

TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Capn' Crunch
You will die on: Thursday, June 29, 2028
You will die of: Sodomy accident

TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: agroskaterik
You will die on: Thursday, April 22, 2028
You will die of: Suicide

TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: george
You will die on: Monday, March 4, 2042
You will die of: falling tornado debris

[Cap'n Crunch]

Great, I got raped to death by a bunch of angry Jamacians.

[noob3]

haha, my death/death time sounds pretty accurate.

[The Retro Kat]

It's fucking crazy, because it randomly generated that, and look at Jeanette's!

[Jixby Phillips]

THE MYSTERY FILES OF SHELBY WOO

[Mike]

I'm invincible!

[FartinMowler]

Blue Oatmeal? WTF? I predict raped in prison then dies of complications due to bar of soap rammed up ass..

[ScruU2wice]

TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: Jixby Phillips
You will die on: Sunday, March 25, 2012
You will die of: Slipped on Ice

wasnt ice king your title on the old boards, jixby? :eek

[Les Waste]

The Ice King was Bad Mr. Frosty's title, and I requested it too cause I'm a dick, and than Jixby did it too. I'm a trend setter :hat

And falling down stairs my ass. I'm dying of a massive heart attack in 11 years. >:

And I can't believe it took you that long to do me. The fact that you thought of Kellychaos before you thought of me makes the blood in my eyes boil >:

[Black Flag]

Who the hell are half these people?

[The Retro Kat]

Its not that you werent thought of first, Bobo, but I was skimming down the "Last Post" in love line first, just to do random names. You are a god among men and high on my list of people I would lose my virginity to.

[Esuohlim]

I WAS FIRST ON THE LIST, FUCKERS. :(

[Les Waste]

http://www.petvets.com/petpostcards/kittenfishbowl.jpg

[Lenor]

and where the fuck am I dammit???

[Les Waste]

NOnE of MAH' BIzZNItcH?

[noob3]

DON'T FUCKING MAKE FUN OF LENORE

[Les Waste]

I WASN'T I WAS JUST TRYING TO MAKE CONVERSATION

EDI: OMFG THAT WAS POST 2000

:DANCING

[Comrade Rocket]

Ya gotta do me,

And then find out how i'll die.

Ahh nothing like sex then finding out how you die. I love this world.

[CaptainBubba]

HOW BADLY DID YOU WANT TO ADD IN THAT SEX COMMENT?

[Comrade Rocket]

SO BAD IT HURTS MY ANKLES... yeah im tired and frustrated.

[Les Waste]

Good news, Trigger! You'll die in 2008. You'll be walking home late one night after another hard day's work at the lye factory, when a small glint in a dumpster catches your eye. Intrigued, you go in for a closer look and discover that it is the shining blade of a steak knife, halfway planted into the soft soft of an infant not more than two weeks old. Although you feel depressed upon seeing the dead baby, you think to yourself "well, this baby is dead, and this is probably my only chance to find out what people meat tastes like."

So, cautiously, you bundle the dead baby up in discarded newspapers and walk home with it inside your shirt. Upon arriving at your one-room living quarters in the rundown tenemant apartment building, you carefully clean and de-bone the baby corpse and start to cook the slabs of it's meat in your George Foreman grill. After several bites, you discover that you did not take out all the bones when you begin to joke on the baby's tiny, undeveloped femur. After several minutes of wheezing and bashing your head into the table in an attempt to dislodge the bone, you turn blue and pass out, dying soon after.

Awwww man! You're so lucky!

[Perndog]

YOU DUMMY BABIES AREN'T PEOPLE :lol

[Les Waste]

>:

[Big Papa Goat]

I LOVE MY GEORGE FOREMAN GRILL!
It's great for grilling a whole baby, or just fillets of flesh from the frenchman you just fucked.
haha alliteration! It's fun! And e-z!

[Les Waste]

>: >:

[jin]

"Super Retro Guy: jin
TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: jin
You will die on: Thursday, October 23, 2014
You will die of: Gunshot"

Why does this sound so true? :(

This is all very disturbing because i always said i would die at 30 and this is just after my 30th birthday, and ive already been shot (grazed) twice. :(

Third time lucky?

I HATE THE INTERNET. >: >: >:

[Bestrest]

Lol i suck, becuz i'm not in the list :P

[FS]

I've got this thing beat. In 2024, I'll just not eat anything.

[kellychaos]

I want my electrocution to be routed from my genetalia to an old rusty mattress which is in turn hooked up to a 20 volt car battery. I will give only my name, rank and SSN and die as I lived ... a hero.

[Rev. Danno]

I AM IMORTAL!!!! I WILL NOT DIE!!!
i wasn't on the list...

[Rongi]

:'(

[glowbelly]

TyrantOfTheAnts: Your name: glowbelly
You will die on: Thursday, April 25, 2030
You will die of: Skin Cancer


this is the most fucked up ever because i'm insane about wearing sunblock (hehe, i originally typed sinblock). i'm so afraid of getting skin cancer, yet i smoke.

i'm an enigma. :(

[george]

sinblock would be an even better enigma.

[glowbelly]

FOR YOU TO POOP ON?

:lol

[george]

i have been trying to teach my dog how to smoke

[McClain]

You can teach a dog to water but you can't make it in the kitchen.

[glowbelly]

i made it on the kitchen floor last week :eek

[Comrade Rocket]

thats funny cuz i have almost died from choking on a baby pelvis before.

Creepy stuff indeed

[Les Waste]

DON'T YOU DARE PLAY ALONG WITH MY JOKE, JUST SIT THERE AND STARE AT THE FLOOR, YOU DON'T NOT SUCK ENOUGH TO BE KEWL

>:

[kellychaos]

Are plug-in, double-donged, vibrating dildos a common cause of electrocution deaths? :/

[Spectre X]

I want to know how the hell I die. HIT ME!

[Hobo Renee]

Okay, I'm confused, is this an online generator thing or just some guy on AIM. Regardless, why does everyone always forget me. I've been here forever :(

[Les Waste]

Spectre X will die in an unfortunate boating accident after attempting to water ski by himself, using a cinder block tied to a rope to hold the throttle at max speed!

And Hobo Renee will die in her mansion after attempting to use a $100 bill to light her cigar, only to watch the small flame instantly ignite the giant piles of money she uses as furniture, and as an end result her mansion will look like a haunted house and she'll resemble a corpse from the movie Backdraft. Of course, she'll be 97 when this happens and will have already lived a long, full life as America's most successful rock star robber baron.

Looks like you lose, Spectre X >:

[Hobo Renee]

Fuck yeah.