New here

[Mike P]

I'm new here. Anything I should know before plunging in to these dangerous waters?

[Anonymous]

Yes.

http://www.i-mockery.net/viewtopic.php?t=3138

Note rule 4 under General Posting Guidelines.

[Evil Robot]

You have already lost whatever shread of respect you will ever recieve around here by doing this. I suggest you become one of those people who post for an hour and never come back. Sorry, but thats life.

[Secret Agent Vomit]

hay. how R U? :wink

[Jixby Phillips]

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[HickMan]

RULE NUMBER 4

[Mockery]

Yo, Mike P dude... there's like, this CRAZY rule you should check out. I think it's called something like "Rule Number 4" or something.

Catch ya later, bro!

[HickMan]

What the fuck is rule number 4?

[Cap'n Crunch]

NO SWIMMING.

[CaptainBubba]

BLACKS ONLY

[Esuohlim]

CUT YOUR PENIS OFF

[Lotida]

I never made an I'M NEW thread and people were still pissy to me.........even with my boobs hanging out of my avatar! >:

[HickMan]

Those aint real, sis.

[Lotida]

Sshhhhhhh.......

It's our secret!! ;)

[Jixby Phillips]

We don't like you because :lol you aren't interesting or funny :

[Lotida]

If that were the criteria then no one would like you. :)

[Anonymous]

Good answer, jeanchaos.

[Lotida]

Damn, now the Gay Dog is getting into my shit. Shouldn't you be in a thread telling someone to lick your balls or something?

Are you guys immune to reading anything but "Fuck you" "Your an Asshole" "Die", etc.. etc.. threads? You actually think that is funny??

BTW, I happen to think Kellychaos's threads are quite amusing so comparing me with him is no big put down to me! :)

Carry on.....

[The Retro Kat]

The fact that you think kellychaos's threads are amusing makes my boner go down a little.

[Lotida]

Think happy thoughts!

[Drev]

I followed rule #4! :)

[The Retro Kat]

Too bad you still suck.

[HickMan]

Think happy thoughts!

NO

[Schimid]

HALF OF THE PEOPLE HERE ARE GAYS

[ScruU2wice]

i think mock should sell shirts saying "i followed rule number 4"...

[Schimid]

7/12 OF THE PEOPLE HERE ARE GAYS

[Anonymous]

I-Mockery for Fucktards

Step 1: Read the rules

Step 2: Ignore them

Step 3: Make up some "clever" profile

Step 4: Login

Now you've got a couple options depending on your personality if friendly go to Step 5, if not go to step 8.

Step 5: Make up a stupid ass thread such as Hi! or I'm new here!

Step 6: Become everyone's bitch boy.

Step 7: Whine about fucktards attacking you then go cry in your pink pillows, while your Dad comforts you by pumping you in the ass.

If hostile:

Step 8: Pick a fight with one or more of the fucktard's already on here. (Preferably as many as possible)

Step 9: Continue this until you get bored.

Step 10: Post half way civilized for awhile until...a) Someone calls you a fucktard. b) You call someone a fucktard. (Insults may differ)

Step 11: Repeat steps 8-10.

Welcome to Fucktard Central.

[Evil Robot]

http://fastclick.com.edgesuite.net/8505/10002/fc/mid19/0207-redbuttons-clickblk-720300.gif

[ScruU2wice]

i think your math's a lil off schimid :(
but your hotness makes up for it :love

[Mike]

Fuck you, Mike P. I am the original. You suck....more than me.

[Professor Cool]

I broke rule number 4 too, remember guys...

[Jixby Phillips]

Yeah but that was back when Rule Number 4 said "Don't make a 'Hi I'm new thread,' unless you ROCK!"

[HickMan]

i think mock should sell shirts saying "i followed rule number 4"...

YES

[mburbank]

This is just the same thread as that other thread and now its ruined.

[Mike P]

Crap. Next time I'm reading the freaking rules. Stupid goddamned me.

[Mike]

That would be a good idea, fuckface. Now why don't you just rub bullshit on yourself and go into the field and have mad cow sex......WITH COWS!!!

[Esuohlim]

i think mock should sell shirts saying "i followed rule number 4"...

HE WOULD ONLY BE ABLE TO SELL LIKE 4 OF THEM

[DJ Potatoe]

Man, am I glad I never posted on this stupid thread.

[Anonymous]

Get it?

[Lotida]

Everyone is so worried about Rule #4 that they have completely overlooked RULE #1!! >:

1) Malicious remarks in the form of Racism, Sexism, ,Homophobia, etc. will not be tolerated. The whole "you're a faggot, you're retarded, etc etc." simply demonstrates that you're an uncreative halfwit with nothing to say. If you're caught saying that kind of shit, you will be warned once. If it continues, you'll be banned permanently.

[GADZOOKS]

Because your avatar has boobs in it, bitch.

Now just let me TAP that ass! [/blackatude]

[Lotida]

You don't know me well enough to call me Bitch! >:

[GADZOOKS]

how about mister then?

[Lotida]

On 2nd thought......just don't call me! :blah

[GADZOOKS]

Too bad, i got your number

867-5309

I'm gonna get SEX, right Milhouse.

Esuohlim: I AM NOT FUCKING YOU, WTF!

[Lotida]

My name is not Jenny. >:

[HickMan]

SALLY

[Lotida]

I refuse to allow anyone from Ohio call me names! >:

[HickMan]

BETTY

[Lotida]

Your getting warmer. :rolleyes

[GADZOOKS]

Franklin?

[DJ Potatoe]

Johnathan Waterman Periwinkle

thats her full name.

[HickMan]

BETH

[sadie]

wait a minute. there are RULES?

[kellychaos]

How am I still around, then?

[The Retro Kat]

Step 10: Post half way civilized for awhile until...a) Someone calls you a fucktard. b) You call someone a fucktard. (Insults may differ)


It's amazing how badly you suck, yet you are so self-centered you think you are the greatest. You're like a rich, spoiled 8 year old girl. The only difference is you get raped more, and like it more. And insults don't differ with you, if you choose to reply, you're going to say the same ol' inane, useless shit you always say. So if you know what best for you, and have a shread of dignity, don't reply. Ever. Good night.

[DJ Potatoe]

good night

[Anonymous]

Retro Kat: Its amazing what a fucktard you are, and much like a fucking castrated cat, you just don't fucking get it.
If you had any sense you would've just ignored the fucking post like everyone else did. Your insults don't differ either. Ohh raped! That's original! Which fucktard did you steal that one from?

The fact that you brought up dignity is laughable, because if I sucked as badly as you believe I do, you suck even more for replying to the shit!

So go back to your sick little fantasies about raping 8 year old girls, but remember just because your Dad raped you as a kid doesn't mean you should follow in his footsteps.

Break the cycle Retro. Break the cycle. Break it much like when your Dad broke your fucking cherry, and the blood gushed from your ass and mixed with his semen. And it was at that point you knew what true love was.

(See? If you're going to use the same insult, add some favor text to it. It makes it so much more enjoyable for the other fucktards on here to read, assuming they can without the help of their special ed. teacher)

Now if you know what's good for you, you'll roll over like the bitch you are, just admit defeat and not reply, but of course you will. Why? Because you're a predictable fucktard.

Toodles, Boy Cunt!

[Schimid]

If you're going to use the same insult, add some favor text to it

Fucking irony. >:

The overuse of the word "fucktard", the three-paragraph essay on why you think America is a democracy and the "Toodles" goodbye. You're a living fucking mad lib.

[Anonymous]

Schimid:What? I never said America was a democracy. Never has been.

As for everything else, it doesn't matter what you say. If you respond to me in anyway, you're a fucktard. Plain and simple.

Want to prove that you're not? Ignore the fucking insults.

But I suppose you won't be able to, because its so much more fun not being intelligent.

Of course for you, it isn't for fun. Its a way of life.

Toodles, Retro's bitch!

[Schimid]

Schimid:What? I never said America was a democracy. Never has been.

DOESN'T GET JOKES.

As for everything else, it doesn't matter what you say. If you respond to me in anyway, you're a fucktard. Plain and simple.

Want to prove that you're not? Ignore the fucking insults.

But I suppose you won't be able to, because its so much more fun not being intelligent.

Of course for you, it isn't for fun. Its a way of life.

THREE PARAGRAPH ESSAY.

Toodles, Retro's bitch!

TOODLES GOODBYE.

YOU'RE FUCKING LAME.

[Rez]

Retro Kat: Its amazing what a fucktard you are, and much like a fucking castrated cat, you just don't fucking get it.
If you had any sense you would've just ignored the fucking post like everyone else did. Your insults don't differ either. Ohh raped! That's original! Which fucktard did you steal that one from?

The fact that you brought up dignity is laughable, because if I sucked as badly as you believe I do, you suck even more for replying to the shit!

So go back to your sick little fantasies about raping 8 year old girls, but remember just because your Dad raped you as a kid doesn't mean you should follow in his footsteps.

Break the cycle Retro. Break the cycle. Break it much like when your Dad broke your fucking cherry, and the blood gushed from your ass and mixed with his semen. And it was at that point you knew what true love was.

(See? If you're going to use the same insult, add some favor text to it. It makes it so much more enjoyable for the other fucktards on here to read, assuming they can without the help of their special ed. teacher)

Now if you know what's good for you, you'll roll over like the bitch you are, just admit defeat and not reply, but of course you will. Why? Because you're a predictable fucktard.

Toodles, Boy Cunt!

http://www.poptunes.de/giraffebirth.gif

[kahljorn]

"The fact that you brought up dignity is laughable, because if I sucked as badly as you believe I do, you suck even more for replying to the shit! "

THEN YOU SUCK WORSE FOR RESPONDING TO HIM. Also, you've responded to like 20 other people, so everytime you respond you get perpetually suckier and suckier.

Also, this is not a reply, it's merely an outright attack against your very base form of intelligence.
Also, I will not reply to you after you reply to this and become even sucker-- because I suck more lesser than you.

[The Retro Kat]

I can't not reply, dear old Max. Why? Because you haven't defeated shit. Tell me Max, have you ever been to a Turkish prison? (guess what that's from). But, if you insist, I'll change it up for you, but in turn, you should change it up, too. Because hearing the same fucking reply over and over again is just plain ol boring, and I hope we both understand that.


I SWEAR TO GOD, MAD MAX HAD SEX WITH MY SCHOOL JANITOR, CHUCK. CHUCK HAS A PONY TALE AND A BEARD. SOMETIMES WHEN HE LAUGHS, HE PEES. ONE TIME, I LOOKED IN THE JANITOR'S CLOSET AND I SAW CHUCK PEEING ON MAX'S FACE, IT WAS KINDA FUNNY, BUT IT SMELLED. MAX HAD A TINY BUTTHOLE, BUT AFTER CHUCK WAS DONE, HE HAD A TRUE MAN'S BUTTHOLE.

[ScruU2wice]

Ignore the fucking insults.

you spent 2 posts that are about 3 paragraphs like schimid said. it would be really easy to ignore if you didn't have 2 half page posts with fucktard used close to 5 times :(

but off course your gonna have a response because you wanna make sure we spend our time ignoring your posts :rolleyes

[Anonymous]

Schimid: Goodbye and Toodles are the same fucking thing. Thank you for that wonderful example of your fucktard redundancy.
And hopefully that was simple enough for your pitiful brain to understand.

kahljorn: How wonderful of you to join this fucktard fest. I fear your brain capacity has fallen short again however. Y'see I'm not here to entertain you fucktards, you're here to entertain me. And everytime you respond to me, it proves everything I say about you fucktards. Doesn't matter how much you say I suck, because your opinion means shit, just like every other fucktard on here. I am curious to see if you REALLY won't respond though, seeing as the last time I put you bitches in your place, you were one of the more vocal fucktards.

Ohh come on you "rebels" and "original thinkers" tell me ALL your witty insults.

Toodles, fucktards

(Geez I know you must be sick of that word...)

[Anonymous]

Retro Kat: If you're in love with me, I wish you'd just admit it, at this point. Its okay, I understand your hostility towards me a little better now. Its very common for Fat Asses who still live at home with their Mother to have latent homosexual tendencies. And while I'm sorry your butt boy relationship didn't work out with ScruU2wice, but you can't just hang around on the internet all day jacking off to little boy porn. Get out of the house, I'm sure your mother would like that.

ScruU2wice: Well I wouldn't post long insults if you fucktards didn't obviously have so much wrong with you that I could make fun of.

Toodles, Fucktards!

Don't you just LOVE that word?

[Geggy]

How wonderful of you to join this fucktard fest.

Hey, weren't you the one who started the fucktard fest? fucktard.

[Anonymous]

Geggy:Actually Mike P. did since he created this thread. But the real credit goes to Retro, who couldn't resist the urge to respond because he's fucking in love with me. So I suggest you stop flirting with me, I'd imagine Retro's the jealous type.

Toodles, Fucktards!

For those that can't get enough of that word...

[Evil Robot]

OMG!!!! YOUR FROM THE OUTER REACHES OF MY MIND?!!! DUDE THAT HAS SUCH DEEP MEANING! I MEAN GOD DAMN, YOU MUST BE SCREWING WITH EVERYBODYS HEAD WITH THAT ONE! shit head.

[Big Papa Goat]

Mad Max is MAD! >: Call me a fucktard Max, it'll make me so sad that I'll want to have sex with my father. Say something about me wanting to have gay sex with some random person from the boards. Such vicious insults as those will surely sap my will to live.
it proves everything I say about you fucktards
You haven't said anything about us except that we're fucktards, so what are we proving by responding? That we're fucktards? What is the point of your incoherent and meaningless insults? What are you trying to prove?

[ScruU2wice]

this is what i found when i did a google search for fucktard

http://storetn.cafepress.com/5/3769455_F_store.jpg

with moderate search on

i think the guy from evil robots avatar just died :(

[The Retro Kat]

Dear Mad Max,
Thank you for that wonderful example of your fucktard redundancy.
And hopefully that was simple enough for your pitiful brain to understand.

Mad Max, how wonderful of you to join this fucktard fest. I fear your brain capacity has fallen short again however. Y'see I'm not here to entertain you, fucktard, you're here to entertain me. And everytime you respond to me, it proves everything I say about you, fucktard. It doesn't matter how much you say I suck, because your opinion means shit, just like every other time you say it. I am curious to see if you REALLY won't respond though, seeing as the last time I put your bitch ass in place, you were more vocal, fucktard.

Ohh come on you "rebel" and "original thinker," tell me ALL your witty insults.

Toodles, fucktard.

(Geez, he sodomizes goats...)

[Geggy]

Mad Max's next post will be number 67.

[Skulhedface]

And in reply to post #67, will be "No. Seriously. SHUT THE FUCK UP."

[Cap'n Crunch]

http://www.poptunes.de/giraffebirth.gif

That is hilarious. :(

[Anonymous]

Evil Robot: OMG YOU CAN ACTUALLY READ! THAT'S ABSOLUTELY AMAZING! I MEAN SHIT, THAT MUST MAKE YOU THE SMARTEST BITCH BOY ON HERE! fucktard.

Big Papa Goat: My point isn't important, I don't need one, just think of me as a scientist, studying lower life forms.
What are you proving by responding? Well your inability to learn for one thing. Thus proof of your fucktardism.
And my telling you so won't make you want to have gay sex with your family members, that just something you fucktards happen to do long before I got here.

Retro Kat:Geez, you really are bad at this aren't you? Actually you were coming pretty close to being a worthy opponent, but your last response has proven that you're just as useless as the rest of these fucktards.

Geggy:Correct. Did you learn to count by watching the number of guys fucking your Mom or did you learn to count by the number of dicks you sucked?

Skulhedface:Stop responding to the posts fucktard, and I will.

Toodles, Fucktards!

(Ah, a word that just describes you so well...)

[Command Prompt]

JOIN MY INTERNET FRATERNITY!!!

KAPPA PI OMEGA

MMMMM PIE LOL

[Rez]

Evil Robot: OMG YOU CAN ACTUALLY READ! THAT'S ABSOLUTELY AMAZING! I MEAN SHIT, THAT MUST MAKE YOU THE SMARTEST BITCH BOY ON HERE! fucktard.

Big Papa Goat: My point isn't important, I don't need one, just think of me as a scientist, studying lower life forms.
What are you proving by responding? Well your inability to learn for one thing. Thus proof of your fucktardism.
And my telling you so won't make you want to have gay sex with your family members, that just something you fucktards happen to do long before I got here.

Retro Kat:Geez, you really are bad at this aren't you? Actually you were coming pretty close to being a worthy opponent, but your last response has proven that you're just as useless as the rest of these fucktards.

Geggy:Correct. Did you learn to count by watching the number of guys fucking your Mom or did you learn to count by the number of dicks you sucked?

Skulhedface:Stop responding to the posts fucktard, and I will.

Toodles, Fucktards!

(Ah, a word that just describes you so well...)

:sleep

what should have been the first and only response to this insecure, prolixitous loudmouthed jerkoff.

[The Retro Kat]

SO AFTER MAD MAX WAS GETTING PEED ON A WASD SMELLY, HE LOOKED AT ME AND STOOD UP. I SAW HIS NUTS. THEY WERE WEIRD LOOKING. AND HE LIKE, OMG, THREE PUBES, THEY WERE CURLY, BUT THERE WAS A LOT OF BALDNESS. HE BUT WAS REALLY RED. AND THE REDNESS WAS DRIPPING DOWN HIS LEG, TOO. THEN CHUCK SMILED AND WINKED AT ME AND I RAN TO MY CLASS SCREAMING, "DIRTY LAUNDRY!"

[ScruU2wice]

you really are bad at this aren't you? Actually you were coming pretty close to being a worthy opponent

i missed when the epic duel of the boards began :(

[Anonymous]

Rez: Actually, NO response would've been better, which you seem to be incapable of doing. You're just another jabbering fucktard who doesn't know shit.

Retro Kat: (Sigh) You're about as original as a fucking TV sitcom and twice as moronic. But okay I'll play...

So Retro Kat waited in his pink flowery dress as scent of perfume masked the smell of his shit stained underwear. He knew tonight would be the night that Rez would make him the Bitch he always dreamed of being.
As Rez entered the room Retro couldn't contain himself and shot his load right then and there, ruining his Transformer pillows. Rez unzipped his pants producing his one inch hairless and Retro began to suck on it as he would a tic tac. As Rez exploded into Retro's mouth, causing him to choke on his salty dick shot, but still lapping it up with delight.
Rez then bent Retro over licking his asshole until it was completely clean, and then proceeded to buttfuck Retro until they were both exhausted.
"I love you Rez!" Retro said.
"I love you too Retro!" Rez replied back.

They then opened up a book store together and lived happily ever until they both died of colon cancer.

THE END

Checkmate fucktard.

Toodles Fucktards! See you in a few months!

(And hopefully you'll be more challenging next time)

[Ninjavenom]

I can tell you're smart because of the numerous times variations of "fuck" appear in what you attempt to construe as intelligent arguments.

[Esuohlim]

Mad Max, make a post about me. ^.^

[The Retro Kat]

Cause you know I call people by their internet names away from the computer...



SO I SAW MAX IN THE HALL THE DAY AFTER. HE WAS WALKING WIDE-LEGGED. I DON'T KNOW WHY. THEN I WENT TO REZ'S HOUSE AND WAS ALL LIKE, "SUP REZ!?"
HE WAS ALL LIKE, "NOT TOO MUCH RETRO"
AND I WAS ALL LIKE, "COOL" THEN I LEFT.
WHEN I WAS WALKING HOME, I SAW A BIG, WHITE VAN, AND MAX WAS ALL LIKE, SCREAMING AND STUF. HE WASN'T WEARING CLOTHES AGAIN. THEN HE CAME UP TO ME IN SCHOOL THE NEXT DAY, AND HE WAS ALL LIKE, THAT WAS JUST MY PARENTS GIVING ME A RIDE HOME.
AND I WAS LIKE, DID THE GIVE YOU THE SEX
AND HE WAS ALL LIKE, YEAH.
THEN HE SNEEZED AND IT WAS GROSS CAUSE IT WAS ALL, LIKE, BOOGERY.

[ItalianStereotype]

hey max, yeah guy, I REALLY need more "fucktard" in your posts. they make you sound so witty.