what should jesus say?

[george]

i have a cermaic jesus head that i and blue fox stole from a yard sale. jesus used to have a shrine on the top of a ladder in my kitchen (lots of colored lights, and a candle, and such). we took jesus down from the ladder beacause he started falling off and nearly killed our bird (an evil creature that now lives at my parents house, he killed one of my mom's parakeets the other day, but on the fun side you could give him as much beer as you wanted) and put him on top of the refridgerator. i will post a picture of it when blue fox teaches me how to email a picture to myself from my cell phone, but i bought a bunch of alphabet magnets and now jesus gets to give a new message every few days. so far he has said:

BITCH BETTER HAVE MY MONEY.

JESUS WOULD LOVE A FUDGE BONER.

ZOD IS LOVE.

ALL HAIL ZOD.

I WILL ONLY LET YOU DOWN.

MY MUSTACHE BRINGS ALL THE GIRLS TO THE YARD.

anywhoo, i like to update the message frequently, and maybe one of you jerks can make me laugh. i will post a picture of jesus with your qoute if it's good. a shitty reward i know, but i am not like the megamillionaire :posh running this site. i am poor.

[JediScum]

I LOVE MURDERPORN

[george]

thank you for your contribution, it made me giggle. :lol--kind of.

[Cosmo Electrolux]

I'll lick your taint for a dollar

[george]

damn stone pants rabbit. :lol

[Cosmo Electrolux]

rent to own, baby...

[AlliSabbah]

F'N Nails

[MarioRPG]

I wonder what they need such a big cross for...

[kahljorn]

I think jesus would say, "Quit fucking talking about me"

[sspadowsky]

"Shit. Hey, would someone please scratch my nose for me?"

[Cosmo Electrolux]

"HEY...hey you...jew boy....*SPit*

[Dr. Boogie]

"Hey baby, you wanna eat of my flesh?"

[Cosmo Electrolux]

yeah, Baby....and drink of the blood......

[Qwarx]

"Thou shalt not steal... my beer!"

[Madman914]

"Scooch those Pringles over my way"

[Tadao]

I hold the longest IRON CROSS record.

[WhiteRat]

"It sho is hard bein' a bidness man."

[george]

if i'd of married a businessman then we'd have nice things.

a little help PLEASE.

[Tadao]

Stop masturbating with the butter

[Evil Robot]

"Anal beads!!!"

[george]

i am going to have to get magnetic punctuation marks!!!!!!

[argonath]

"My dad can kick your dad's ass."

[Cosmo Electrolux]

2saviours1cup.com

[MLE]

hahahaha

[mburbank]

"I can see your house from up here"

[Geggy]

"i died for this?"

[Evil Robot]

"I lied about the whole son of God thing"

[Blue Fox]

Screaming Lobsters!!!

[executioneer]

"I'M A HOT CHICK AND I LOVE JIXBY PHILLIPS"

[JediScum]

"When I die, bury Me upside down so everyone can KISS MY ASS!"

[Et tu]

“My God, evolution is a fact, and if these people are disturbed by being the descendants of monkeys and fishes, they’ve got a mental problem. We can’t afford the psychiatric bill for them. That ends the story as far as I’m concerned.”

[executioneer]

i don't think he's got that many magnet letters, dude

[JediScum]

"Thank you for choosing McDonald's.... Can I take Jew order?"

(nevermind, even I think that's horrible)

[umop apisdn]

"What's the difference between an oil painting of me and my actual self? You only need one nail to hang up the painting."

[Girl Drink Drunk]

"DIE FOR YOUR OWN SINS!"

[Fat_Hippo]

"Okay...where the FUCK is my body!?"

[MLE]

you jerks aren't even funny >:

[Fat_Hippo]

True...but at least we're trying...no, you're right, I'll shut up.

[Super Llama]

"HEEEEEERE'S JESUS!" *said while chopping though a door with an ax*

[MLE]

Goddamn it I hate all of you.

[Madman914]

Goddamn it I hate all of you.
I that you saying that or Jesus? cause if it's Jesus I'm afraid for my eternity, and if it's you I'm very afraid for my eternity.

[Girl Drink Drunk]

"Jesus Christ, these new guys suck"

[Madman914]

Better than a thousand hollow words is one word that brings peace.

[executioneer]

"SCANDALIZE SOME N****S" :eek

[Girl Drink Drunk]

"Hey, does anybody know where I can find a good Commodore 64 emulator?"

[Qwarx]

"Let there be light... beer."

Dammit I wish I could think of ones that don't pertain to alcoholic beverages.

[MarioRPG]

"You already missed my second coming."

[MLE]

I'm going to kill you in your sleep.

[glowbelly]

jesus would say HELLO GEORGE WHY DON'T YOU TALK TO ME ABOUT WHY YOU DON'T TALK TO GLOWBELLY ANYMORE. IS IT BECAUSE YOU ARE AFRAID TO DESTROY HER MARRIAGE OR THAT YOU DON'T WANT ANYONE TO KNOW THAT YOU REALLY ARE CAPABLE OF ENJOYING A NICE PAIR OF SOCKED FEET? PERHAPS YOU SHOULD CALL HER AND TELL HER HOW YOU REALLY FEEL.

and

IF SOMEONE LETS ME DOWN I'LL STOP BEING SO GODDAMNED ANNOYING. >:

[Cosmo Electrolux]

would jesus really say all of that? wow....just wow.

[glowbelly]

hey cosmo! what did one dick say to the other dick?

[Cosmo Electrolux]

I don't know, Glow

[glowbelly]

MY NAME IS RICHARD >:

[executioneer]

what's the name of his other leg :disneymovie

[Cosmo Electrolux]

ha ha ha ha :(

[Tadao]

"Don't wait up for me"