Fatty fatty fat cat!

[WhiteRat]

Introducing the fattest cat i've ever seen, Kailee(strangely the cat is a male, it's previous owners named the poor thing that). This beauty weighs in at a plump 42lb. and can't walk more than a few feet without falling over on his side to recover what little strength he can muster.

The cat resides at my sister's veterinary clinic and is on a strict diet. The previous owner's thought that stuffing their cat with people food was funny and that having the fat cat on the news was great...that is until the cat was too fat to climb into his own litter box, causing him to piss and shit everywhere. The owners took him to my sister's vet to be put down, but the clinic convinced the owners to give them the cat instead to try to get it down to a manageable weight.

Enjoy these grainy cell phone pics of the beast:

http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q15/JerkDouglas/img031.jpg

http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q15/JerkDouglas/img029.jpg

http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q15/JerkDouglas/img030.jpg

http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q15/JerkDouglas/img027.jpg

[Emu]

He looks like a big cuddly rug. :(

[Dixie]

It's like a fluffy swollen tick.

[Neen]

a sentient beanbag-chair

[Madman914]

It looks like snarf.

[Seven Force]

that poor cat :(

[Tadao]

Look how much pain he's in when you lift him by the shoulders! Ughh poor fatty!

[executioneer]

holy moses

[Dr. V]

I hate mondays.

[executioneer]

nighty nightmare indeed

[Qwarx]

He looks like a giant marshmallow.

[Fathom Zero]

It has kankles.

[Tadao]

no big pussy jokes?

[Dr. V]

No we have fucking class. *spit*

[Sacks]

We were going to let you have a crack at those since it's your birthday and all.

That last picture is absolutely hilarious.

[Tadao]

That pussy is so big that it made your mom mad when she lost her title.

[Sacks]

Happy Birthday, Tadao. I hope it was all you hoped it would be!

http://www.shippony.com/coolestkid/cakes/birthday-cake-recipes-09.jpg


As you can see I got this image from coolest-birthday-cakes.com so I was sure it would be a grandslam! I hope you like baseball!

[Tadao]

your teh best guys

[Tadao]

she shape is nice but she made her mom get angry
---------------------------------------------------------------------
please visit on my blog
no spam, spammer -MLE

Talk shit about my cake again and I'll punch you in the Vagina!

And I will not visit your Blog!

[executioneer]

no big pussy jokes?

http://www.tvguide.com/images/pgimg/sopranos23.jpg?

-willie

[Kingofeurope]

wow, what a fatass.

[WhiteRat]

It's like a fluffy swollen tick.

I'd say this description is most accurate.

[Hangie]

I would make jokes, but cats seriously arent supposed to get that fat it leads to medical problems, so I wont.

[Fathom Zero]

The cat's face in the last picture is hilarious.

[MattJack]

The cat's face in the last picture is hilarious.

I was just about to say the same thing.

[Tadao]

It's the look of back pain.

[Asila]

I know it's supposed to be funny, but it's just kinda sad. He's gotta fucking hate his life.

[MetalMilitia]

That's a fat cat :eek . Sad though.

This cheered me up:

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/01/funny-pictures-late-wet-wiseman-cat.jpg

[Tadao]

http://barbbill.250free.com/Dbrat/HangInThere.gif

[WhiteRat]

I know it's supposed to be funny, but it's just kinda sad. He's gotta fucking hate his life.

My sister and her co-workers took the cat in out of pity and are doing their best to get him to lose weight. I feel bad for him as well, but for as fat as he is, he seems to be in a pretty good mood. When I visited him he was purring loudly and rolling on his back to have his belly rubbed. He may be Fatty McFatterson but he seems to act like any other normal cat.

[Tadao]

i hope you can show us an after pic one day.

[WhiteRat]

Whenever the cat gets down to 20lbs. (still fat, but half what he was in these pics) i'll have my sister snap a few photos.

[Dr. Boogie]

Can the thing even excercise?

[Sacks]

Do we know if it's going to have a lot of excess skin or not?

[WhiteRat]

As far as I know the cat can't excercise. It can only really wobble a bit before he just plops over. I know that Science Diet gave them a shit ton of free diet cat food and that once the cat loses all the weight Science Diet wants to use him as a testimonial.

As far as the skin i'd have to ask my sister about that.

[executioneer]

man it's gonna be able to fly like a flying squirrel :eek

[Guitar Woman]

Everyone already said this but his face in the last picture is priceless :<

It's even funnier because my cat makes that exact same face when I pick her up.

[Jeanette X]

Anyone who feeds an animal that much ought to be arrested on animal cruelty charges. Disgusting.

[Tadao]

Pancakes are not for cats!

[WhiteRat]

Anyone who feeds an animal that much ought to be arrested on animal cruelty charges. Disgusting.

But then you get to be on tv! And the cat is all cute and fat!

[Emu]

Cats seem to be at their happiest when they're fat, even if it is debilitating.

[Dr. Boogie]

Except on Mondays.

[Emu]

Yes, mondays.

[Zomboid]

Except on Mondays.
Man, I wish I had a garfield chia pet.

[Dr. Boogie]

Shut the fuck up.

You know damn well no one wishes they had a chia pet.

[Dr. Octogonopus]

Introducing the fattest cat i've ever seen, Kailee(strangely the cat is a male, it's previous owners named the poor thing that). This beauty weighs in at a plump 42lb. and can't walk more than a few feet without falling over on his side to recover what little strength he can muster.

The cat resides at my sister's veterinary clinic and is on a strict diet. The previous owner's thought that stuffing their cat with people food was funny and that having the fat cat on the news was great...that is until the cat was too fat to climb into his own litter box, causing him to piss and shit everywhere. The owners took him to my sister's vet to be put down, but the clinic convinced the owners to give them the cat instead to try to get it down to a manageable weight.

Enjoy these grainy cell phone pics of the beast:
Quoting multiple pictures is RUDE, son. -MLE

BAHAHAHAHAA that is so pathetic. How have his ankles held up?

[executioneer]

DONT QUOTE WHOLE POSTS FULL OF PICTURES YOU JERK

[DuFresne]

I appreciate you quoting the entire post plus all 4 pictures, or else I may not have know which fat cat in this thread you were refering to.

[Sacks]

The Duf' strikes again.

[TheBigMan045]

The 3rd photo looks as if its about to eat the normal cat LOL, it looks cute and cuddly (im a cat guy)

[Sacks]

I agree with The Big Man! (im a cat guy)

[WhiteRat]

The 3rd photo looks as if its about to eat the normal cat LOL, it looks cute and cuddly (im a cat guy)

Is this you?
http://www.baristanet.com/cat%20guy.jpg

[Tadao]

iwanna photoshop the 4rth pic to cut the cat off at the first set of legs cause it kinda looks like a bat that way, but i can't run photoshop on this piece o crap.

[Grislygus]

I like this thread.

[Pentegarn]

People who do that sort of thing to their pets (especially so they can get on the local news, how pathetic) make me sick. >:

That poor cat :tear

[Pub Lover]

Pentagarn, is your avatar from Cleopatra 2525?

[Pentegarn]

Pentagarn, is your avatar from Cleopatra 2525?

You really don't know who that is? I thought everyone here knew him...

That is the great one himself. The Master. He is the meanest. He is the prettiest. The baddest mo'fo lowdown around in this here town.

Sho'Nuff!

For more details look here...

http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/last-dragon/


For homework, read this article, then go watch that movie.

[Pub Lover]

Oh right, I-Mockery. Yeah I never go to that site.

[Fathom Zero]

If I had any avatar I could want, it'd be from Jack of All Trades and not Cleopatra 2525.

[Zomboid]

I remember that show. Wasn't it only on for like one season? I used to watch the ACTION PACK every sunday, which consisted of Hercules and Xena. Good times.

[Pub Lover]

Wow, how did I not hear about or see Jack of All Trades before? :eek

New goal in life.

[Tadao]

Get us some good Lol pictures before he loses all the weight.

[WhiteRat]

Here's the latest pic of the beast:

http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q15/JerkDouglas/fatty.jpg

[Dixie]

You're gonna need a bigger boat.

[Tadao]

http://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2008/1/30/your128462020737812500.jpg

[WhiteRat]

Yay, he's now a lolcat. :\

[Tadao]

Get us some good Lol pictures before he loses all the weight.

My intention was clear.

[Pub Lover]

T, are we quoting things we've said about lolcats in the past? I think I said something to you about it once. I'll go see if I can find it. ;)

[Tadao]

Idiot.

Tadeo, please keep lolcats in here. I think they are frowned upon on this forum.

I couldn't help it :(

[WhiteRat]

My intention was clear.


I guess I mistakenly held you above those who delicately craft the almighty lolcat.

[Pub Lover]

I couldn't help it :(

I don't think the 'idiot' in the post you quoted was directed at you. ;(

[Tadao]

No, but it works.

I guess I mistakenly held you above those who delicately craft the almighty lolcat.

They make me happy :( :( :(

[Supafly345]

Christ this cat makes me sad.

[Sacks]

I love his totally chillin' out legs in the latest picture.

[TheBigMan045]

No im not a furry lol nice try though, hes too damm skinny. In the latest pic he looks like hes just had a hard day of looking at things

[Pub Lover]

Bigman, you in Auckland?

[MarioRPG]

My cat's 'big' but it is mostly hair, that cat is huge though.
I hope yours doesn't end up like the fattest cat in the world though, with kidney failure and the like :(

[WhiteRat]

Gaining weight is unlikely as the cat is on a strict diet.

[Zomboid]

My cat is pretty big too, but he's kind of a mix of natural size and just eating a lot.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v156/Lucifer40/DSC00569-1.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v156/Lucifer40/DSC00578-1.jpg
He beats the shit out of the little dog all the time and is roughly the same size as him.

[Esuohlim]

Well as long as we're posting pictures of our kitties :eek

http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/2224/sleepycat8um.jpg

My cat has an opposite eating problem. Sort of like the Karen Carpenter eating problem :(

[TheBigMan045]

Yea i am Pub lover how did u guess?
One of my Dads cats thinks she can fly http://img222.imageshack.us/img222/526/supercatna5.jpg Sorry bout the crappy quality

[Sethomas]

http://mypage.iu.edu/%7Estpace/pics/tuesday.jpg

There is no denying that my cat will fuck you up.

[Emu]

http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v238/ikrsez/kittyface.jpg

I hate my cat.

[Tadao]

I don't believe you. You said "MY" cat. you wuv him.

This is Mr. Woogums. He lives with my wife now. I miss his dumb ass.

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f316/tadaoginoza/Animals/Ritz022.jpg

[WhiteRat]

http://mypage.iu.edu/%7Estpace/pics/tuesday.jpg

There is no denying that my cat will fuck you up.

It's got Betty Davis eyes:hypno

[TheBigMan045]

Ive seen dogs that look like cats but never a cat that looks more doglike than catlike...awsome

[LordMalrog]

OMG i've found it! The legendary cat thread :bestthread! SO RARE! but that cat is cute ^^. :lol2

[sakura]

OH MY GAWD!!!

what a cutie!! poor lil' kitty, he doesn't like being picked up.

neither did my fat cat, who was around 36 lbs. he was the most timid kitty ever. i love cats.

[Durin]

That cat needs to be renamed to Jabba.

Other than that, wow, that is one seriously messed up cat. Best of luck slimming it down, and may those who did simply for fun be visited upon by horrors.

[Tadao]

It would be rad it we had a weekly stat on him. Like his weight and heart rate, cholesterol levels, etc. Or a live fatty cam!

[Styled Executioner]

That cat needs to be renamed to Jabba.

Other than that, wow, that is one seriously messed up cat. Best of luck slimming it down, and may those who did simply for fun be visited upon by horrors.

http://img108.imageshack.us/img108/3696/lolcatcl4.png

[Tadao]

Yay, he's now a lolcat. :\
__

[WhiteRat]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v37/176659.9/fatcat_large.gif

[Zomboid]

oh man I love that gif.

[Tadao]

How is fatty?

[Kitsa]

Mr Woogums! I have a flame-point Siamese, too. His name is Cesco. Did Mr. Woogums argue with you? Cesco always has to have the last word.

[Tadao]

Oh Yeah, but he was so nice. I've heard Siamese are bastards but he was the sweetest.

[Dr. Octogonopus]

http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q15/JerkDouglas/img031.jpg



How on earth does a cat get that big?! That's insane! I thought my cat was fat.....

[executioneer]

The previous owner's thought that stuffing their cat with people food was funny

THAT IS HOW, PAY ATTENTION

[Dr. Octogonopus]

I mean, how?! That shouldn't be possible, if mother nature wasn't a bitch!

[Sacks]

DR. OCTOGONOPUS I HAVE HAD IT UP TO HERE WITH YOU!

[Dr. Octogonopus]

Easy, Trigger. What'd I do to offend your honer THIS time?

[WhiteRat]

I shall get an update as well as some additional pictures ASAP (as soon as possible).

[Supafly345]

So it will never be possible.

[Colonel Flagg]

So, whatever happened to "Doc Ock"?

[Tadao]

Fatty catty 2 by 4

[WhiteRat]

I saw ol' Fatty when I went on leave in early November. They said he's down to 32lbs. but he looks just as fat as the first time I saw him. He's so fat that I put a cat treat on his back and ol' Fatty stumbled around all afternoon with the treat on his back.

[Tadao]

:lol poor fatty

[WhiteRat]

My sister told me the other day that he goes down into the basement of the vet and catches mice and voles. The fatty just kills them and leaves the bloody bodies on the floor upstairs for the vets to find.

[Tadao]

I'm surprised he makes it back up the stairs!

[WhiteRat]

Hot new pics of the Cat-Beast should be up tomorrow evening.

[WhiteRat]

32lb. beast:

http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q15/JerkDouglas/344115472_1181302197_0.jpg

http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q15/JerkDouglas/344115787_1181303363_0.jpg

[Dixie]

YAY FAT CAT PICTURES!
He does look more mobile than before!

[Asila]

You could weightlift that sucker

[MetalMilitia]

Now dress it up as a 15th century Spanish conquistador! quick!

[Tadao]

POOR FATTY

[Zomboid]

I went back and looked at the first pics to compare, and he does indeed look slimmer now.

In related news - I'm home for the holidays, and my youngest sister appears to be fatter than ever. I weighed myself the other day, and I'm 176. What I wanna do, is somehow trick her into standing on the scale, because I want to confirm my belief that she outweighs me by at least 50 pounds. Seriously, she's enormous. Suggestions?

IS IT WRONG TO TAKE SPY SHOTS OF MY FAT SISTER TO POST ON HERE FOR OUR AMUSEMENT?

[Colonel Flagg]

Maybe position her as if you're doing a photo shoot, using a partially concealed scale, then have another camera set up surreptitiously to record the final tally. It might even be constructive for her, sort of like an intervention ("You can't deny it anymore, sis, you're 50# bigger than your older brother - time for some diet soda.")

As for he spy shots, it's only wrong if Tadao says it is. :)

[Tadao]

Is your sisters nickname cat? If not, then please keep her fat ass out of this thread!

[Sam]

AND THE CUPCAKES! :lol

[Colonel Flagg]

MUFFINTOP!!!!!

[Supafly345]

God its taking a long time for that cat to lose weight.

[WhiteRat]

True, but at least now he's able to waddle up and down the stairs.

[WhiteRat]

http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q15/JerkDouglas/1219081227.jpg

[Tadao]

I spit my lunch out laughing.

[WhiteRat]

My sister and the other vets usually dress up the cats that live there in different hats and outfits. For some reason she won't dress up Ol' Fatty for us, so I figured I would do the next best thing.

[Tadao]

I agree with her. He got this way because people wanted to make a funny. It would be hard for me too if I had to look him in the eye every day.

[WhiteRat]

I like into those eyes of his and they are just screaming to be dressed up as a 19th century Industrial tycoon.

[Fathom Zero]

Back then, hoes didn't want him. Now he's hot, hoes all on him.

[Tadao]

I wanna make him a pimp cane now.

[WhiteRat]

My sister told me tonight that they have a jacket for him that he wears.

[Tadao]

Please let it be a letterman jacket.

[WhiteRat]

Nah, I think it's a tan jacket with some sort of fuzzy collar or something.

[Sicktodeathmx]

Jesus Christ. I have a cat that weighs 18 pounds, and I thought he was huge :(

[Tadao]

In honor of fatties thread I shall not make a sexual advance pertaining to me seeing pictures of your cat.

[WhiteRat]

SEND ME AN ANGEL
http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q15/JerkDouglas/photo.jpg

My sister told me the other day that the news station that did the report on Fatty a few years ago tracked them down from the previous owners wanting to a follow-up. They told the reporter that Fatty had died recently so that they would leave them alone.

[Shrubfest]

*joy explosion*

[Tadao]

Yay! Fatty makes life more joyous!

[MetalMilitia]

SEND ME AN ANGEL
They told the reporter that Fatty had died recently so that they would leave them alone.

Is that why they dressed it up as an angel - for proof?

[Sicktodeathmx]

Updates on the kittycat?!

[Tadao]

Still fat :rolleyes

[Dixie]

Chubangel Cat rules.

[Tadao]

HI CIG! HAPPY B-DAY TO YOU!

[Dixie]

You're drunker than I am, aren't you?

[WhiteRat]

Fox News Terror Alert:

Fatty has been adopted by one of the veterinarians and has been living in his new home for the past couple of weeks. No more pics of Fatty ever again.

[Tadao]

FUCKINSHITFUCKFUCK

[TheBigMan045]

that just killed this thread :(

[Zomboid]

You'd think so, yeah.

[Sacks]

Fucking bogus.

[Tadao]

Now I see how fatty was created. I feel like force feeding a cat to replace the empty spot in my heart.

[WhiteRat]

BREAKING NEWS ON FATTY

I was informed 2 weeks ago that Fatty, living contently at his new home, possibly had feline leukemia, but the vets were waiting on the results. Well, this morning my sister informed me that Fatty did have leukemia and had fallen gravely ill this weekend. Sometime this morning the poor guy was euthanized. Rest in peace, Sir Fatty. :(

http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q15/JerkDouglas/photo-1.png

[Tadao]

:tear

[Tadao]

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii285/tadao_mockery/Avatars/fatcat_dance.gifHOLD ME CLOSER TINY DANCERhttp://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii285/tadao_mockery/Avatars/fatcat_dance.gif

[Sacks]

Forever in our hearts like arterial plaque.

[Tadao]

I don't believe you. You said "MY" cat. you wuv him.

This is Mr. Woogums. He lives with my wife now. I miss his dumb ass.

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f316/tadaoginoza/Animals/Ritz022.jpg

I miss all my kittehs. :(

[Pub Lover]

Fat kitty is dancing to the Cure in Heaven now. :tear

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

:(

[Sam]

:tear Kitty :tear

[The Leader]

It was the miraculous tale of fatty fat cat that made me decide to finally register on these forums. :tear

[MetalMilitia]

This is just like when Princess Diana died except this time I actually give a shit. :tear

[ddddyyyy]

I agree with WhiteRat





plus i am a spamjerk

[kahljorn]

Good thing he was euthanized from what I remember kitten leukemia is contagious and I think they can give it to humans (or maybe its kitty tuberculosis that is contagious) :O

Tadao's cat looks like Kitsas avatar :(

[MetalMilitia]

I agree with WhiteRat

What sick man posts spam in such a time of crisis! >:

[Fathom Zero]

How is it a crisis? Are we all going to chip in and send him a "Get Well Soon" card?

[MetalMilitia]

I don't know, maybe we should chip in to have a statue of the cat erected in a local park with the contents of this thread etched into the plaque.

Also I'm pretty sure the cat only died because Whiterat posted about it on here. It seems everyone/thing on i-mockery ends up with some debilitating illness.

[Tadao]

At least we can buy a flat metal plate of him standing on one leg and then put it on top of the roof so that it spins in the wind. He could forever dance for us :tear

[Dixie]

This made me sad.
:(

[Tadao]

I agree with WhiteRat


That sure is a lot of brass fitting.

[Womti]

the poor kitty he is so fat he look s like a fish :lol

[The Leader]

Shut up and show some respect, you rapist.

[b_squared]

Poor kitty.
RIP Fatty.

[Shrubfest]

Poor fatty. Worked so hard to be less fat, got nice peoples, then had to be put down.
Life's a bitch.
:(

[WhiteRat]

Between his jazzercising and his South Beach Diet, Fatty had lost over 15 lbs. Godspeed, Fatty. Godspeed.

[Sacks]

15 lbs. and 21 Grams: The Life and Times of Fatty Fatty Fat Cat

[kahljorn]

He wasn't FAT, he was BULBOUS. He's probably looking at this thread from kitty heaven crying about your crude mannerisms :(

[Sacks]

More like sitting in Big Pun's lap getting stroked by those big meaty man-hands.