WWE

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

There was a midget match up in some Las Vegas wrestling PPV. Scott Steiner came out and threw a midget into the 3rd of 4th row from the ring. I think he was seriously hurt but no one seemed to care. :(

[Sam]

Why is Bryan Danielson named Dirk Dickswoggle

[Pentegarn]

I think the better question is "why aren't more people named Dirk Dickswoggle?"

[Guitar Woman]

On /wooo/ everyone likes to call him Dirk Dickbutt. I'm not sure why yet.

[Guitar Woman]

You should have brought shit to throw at Sheamus during his promo

Maybe some tanning gel

[Chojin]

Well it turns out the guy who sold me the tickets was a bit of a liar, but the seats were still pretty good and I only paid face value anyway

http://www.i-mockery.com/chojin/wwe/DSC03232_s.jpg

THE GHOST OF DIBIASE WATCHES OVER US ALL

http://www.i-mockery.com/chojin/wwe/DSC03234.jpg

YOUUUUUU

http://www.i-mockery.com/chojin/wwe/DSC03237.jpg

trips what the fuck are you doing

http://www.i-mockery.com/chojin/wwe/DSC03243.jpg

MY HERO :SWOON

http://www.i-mockery.com/chojin/wwe/DSC03247.jpg

YOU'RE GONNA DIE

http://www.i-mockery.com/chojin/wwe/DSC03257.jpg

I'M BOUT TO GET RULL SURRUS UP IN HERE

http://www.i-mockery.com/chojin/wwe/DSC03258.jpg

CARLITO GIVES CENA THE STINK EYE

http://www.i-mockery.com/chojin/wwe/DSC03266.jpg

and then everyone died.

After raw went off the air, Big Show came back out and attacked DX, then for no reason Orton's music hit and he ran down to the ring and started stomping on michaels. Jerishow ducked out the back and left Orton in the ring seated like a teddy bear.

http://www.i-mockery.com/chojin/wwe/DSC03269.jpg

QUICKLY RANDY HATCH A PLAN

http://www.i-mockery.com/chojin/wwe/DSC03270.jpg

RANDY ORTON, THE NEW 3RD MEMBER OF DX

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I hate how they're always saying Orton is coiled like a snake or he's ready to pounce. He usually just looks like an idiot. He reminds me of the snake from Donkey Kong Country 2 with that dumb look.

[Sam]

I THINK I SAW TOM SAVINI SITTING DIRECTLY BEHIND THE ANNOUNCE TEAM

[Chojin]

i forgot to add the first pic of the set, it's there now

[Guitar Woman]

I don't think they make Viper puns anymore, now that he's just MENTALLY UNSTABLE

The thing I can't stand about Raw announcers is that they don't fucking say anything while a heel is going to work on some jobber.

By which I mean stop with the shocked silence when Sheamus is faffing around, I need a distraction from his generic ring technique and boring gimmick.

[Chojin]

Oh man, I just found out that a lot of wrestlers use Twitter. Miz and Jericho probably have the best ones.

http://twitter.com/WWE/superstars/members

http://twitter.com/WWEJoeyStyles

Man, fuck you Joey.

[Guitar Woman]

Hornswoggle's got one?

Isn't that breaking kayfabe?

[Pentegarn]

Hornswoggle's got one?

Isn't that breaking kayfabe?

Breaking kayfabe is the new kayfabe

[Guitar Woman]

Umaga died :lol :(

I mean, he really died. :(

[Sam]

Yeah he had a heart attack. :(

[Chojin]

When people ask me how he died, I tell them that he was eating popcorn and accidentally gave himself the samoan spike.

[Guitar Woman]

In an eerie trivia note, both Eddie Guerrero and Umaga wrestled their final matches against Ken Anderson. Both grapplers would pass away mere days after facing the former Mr. Kennedy.
http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/618/1260158422030.png

[Sam]

OH SHIT

[Lord Lonic]

Looks like Billy Gunn's former butt buddy is next!

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

http://www.lpcd.de/8/E9129_01.jpg

[Angryhydralisk]

Ca't wait for Monday to see Bret Hart on RAW (Full aware he isn't capable of wrestling at all anymore) and seeing Smackdown/Rejects of Wrestling on the 5th.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I guess TNA is switching to monday nights tomorrow too. So there's going to be a big thing for a new Monday Night Wars.

Also, there should be a luchador named Monday Night Juarez.

[Pentegarn]

^^^

Let us hope that pushes wrestling writers into writing entertaining stuff again

[Tadao]

I saw a WWE movie starring Kane last night. SEE NO EVIL :lol

http://www.celebritywonder.com/wp/Kane_in_See_No_Evil_Wallpaper_2_1280.jpg

[MLE]

How bad was it?

[Tadao]

Pretty dam bad. I could totally see the "twist" ending, and they didn't even do a twist ending.

[Pentegarn]

Speaking of wrestlers in movies....

<object width="560" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/DIR5bcpr-X8&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/DIR5bcpr-X8&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object>

So this is what you stopped being The Rock for?

[MLE]

hahahahahahahahaha, I'm totally going to see that.

[Guitar Woman]

TNA and Raw are about on-par with each other in terms of quality, although I don't think Hulk "ProtoCena" Hogan coming to TNA is going to help it any. He claims TNA's a massive waste of great talent, and I suppose he'd know, since he forced WCW to waste it for years.

Although I'm sure a lot of people will watch TNA just because Hogan's around, even though he claims to have no actual contract to wrestle with them.

Since TNA has room to be something other than kid-friendly role-model wrestling, it could grow into everything WWE isn't right now and actually be legitimate competition. Maybe they could put some actual wrestling on the show, too!

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I really hope he doesn't wrestle anymore. Same thing with Flair.

[Chojin]

I've tried watching TNA a few times and it was just terrible. Their roster is basically the entire WWE attitude era, so I don't know how they manage to fuck that up.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

It used to be really good before they got all the old superstars. On a seperate note

SATURN LIVVVVEEESSS
http://wrestlingtruth.com/wrestlehost/images/c77yk7x6s6tbktmqujv5.jpg

http://wrestlingtruth.com/news/perry-saturn-is-alive-recent-photo/

[MattJack]

Am I the only guy who hates Cena and Batista?

[Tadao]

I hate Cena, have no idea who Batista is, but I probably hate him too.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Batista is like Superman if he was a guido from Nu Joisy

[Sam]

I've tried watching TNA a few times and it was just terrible. Their roster is basically the entire WWE attitude era, so I don't know how they manage to fuck that up.

THEY ARE THE NEW WCW GET IT RIGHT :rolleyes

[Guitar Woman]

oh my god, /wooo/ is having a fucking seizure at the moment :<

I didn't read the Raw sticky, but after skimming the Impact one (Which has about 500 more posts than the Raw one), I've gathered that:
-Jeff Hardy is on TNA, holy fucking shit; Hardy's probably only second to Cena in how over he is, this is gigantic if he stays
-Ric Flair came out of retirement for the 6th fucking time
-Daffney in a nurses outfit :picklehat
-Kevin Nash, although this was known
-The bright orange cage makes it impossible to tell what the fuck's going on inside, so the entire match is shit; plus, it ends by disqualification
-Everyone was hoping Brian Kendrick would show up, including me; he didn't :<

[Sam]

:picklehat

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

:LOL He kicked him in the gut.

[Guitar Woman]

I'll probably watch all of Impact later, but so far

POINTS OF INTEREST:
Daffney in a nurse's outfit <3
Chris Jericho looking like he's getting into shape, which is nice because I hate watching his mantits flop everywhere
Bret Hart
Bret Hart making up with Shawn Michaels
Bret Hart trolling Jericho
AJ Styles vs Kurt Angle (!)
Orton/Legacy friction
Evan Bourne getting a little time on the mic to stand up to Sheamus
Cena's not around, lol

LOW POINTS OF THE NIGHT:
Hulk Hogan drawing a crowd of weirdos
Hulk Hogan bringing a fuckton of old wrestlers to TNA
Hulk Hogan not using "Real American" for his entrance music
Divas match on Raw
MVP becoming #1 contender against The Miz, what the fuck.
Evan Bourne getting his wig split despite being the most awesome man in awesome land
Constant TEE ENN AYY chanting
Shitty cage match
Fucking massive blocks of commercials on TNA
Vince kicking Hart in the gut and then the show ending abruptly, with no closure

It was an ok pair of shows, I guess. I was more excited about a new Monday Night War than anything, and I'll admit that I was a little giddy when Hogan finally showed up after HIS MOTORCADE IS JUST MOMENTS AWAY OH MAN for the entire hour.

Another thing I thought was funny was switching back to Raw during an Impact commercial and catching Randy with Kofi in a headlock. It became funnier after I saw this!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGAwwaGyAY0

[Angryhydralisk]

"I guess hell's frozen over."
http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b150/supercoven/hellfreezesoverl.jpg

Seen ECW/Superstars/Smackdown tonight. Still pissed they teased the Undertaker three times and he didn't come out.

Spoilers for this Friday... (Would put spoilers for Superstars and ECW, but really...who cares?)

* Batista opens SmackDown in the ring. He says that Vickie Guerrero tried to make things right last week, she's still not the General Manager so his match with Rey Mysterio won't happen. Batista calls out Teddy Long but instead Rey Mysterio comes out and says he's ready to go for tonight.

* Dolph Ziggler b. Kane
- Dolph got the win via countout.

* Michelle McCool, Layla El, and Beth Phoenix are backstage making fun of 'Piggy James'. Beth tells Layla that they have a match tonight and she better get serious. Layla and Michelle apologize to Beth for last week.

* Chris Jericho asks the Hart Dynasty backstage if they are ready to make an impact. They tell him they've been ready and that what happened last night on Raw to Bret Hart was an embarrassment.

*Chris Jericho & The Hart Dynasty b. Cryme Time & R-Truth

* CM Punk comes out to the ring with Luke Gallows to "save" a member of the WWE Universe. They pick someone out of the crowd who appear to be a developmental worker. They ask him if he's ready to be safe. The "fan" responds "he thinks so". Punk says that he needs to cut his hair to become part of the "straightedge lifestyle". The "fan" is at first hesitant but finally agrees. Gallows pulls out an electronic razor and shaves his head. Very badly.

* Luke Gallows b. Matt Hardy

* Teddy Long and Maria are backstage talking about the upcoming Celebrity Apprentice. Vickie Guerrero shows up and says she'd be part of the cast but she's been too busy. She asks Maria to do a sales pitch for the new WWE action figures. The Great Khali and Runjin Singh arrive. Khali says that Vickie's action figure reminds him of a cow.

* Beth Phoenix b. Layla El
- After the match Michelle McCool attacks Beth Phoenix. Mickie James comes out and makes the save but kicks Beth as well.

*WWE Intercontinental champion Drew McIntyre was being interviewed backstage when John Morrison showed up and told McIntyre he has to cheat to beat him. They ended up in a brawl, which security broke up. So no Morrison wrestling, which saddened me. But they are selling his glasses now!

*Rey Mysterio vs. Batista went to a no contest when the lights went out and when they returned, both men were unconscious. Ended up in an overbooked mess where they teased Undertaker coming out THREE TIMES. Undertaker never came out (A LOT of people got mad about this too!) But Jericho, Matt Hardy, Kane, and CM Punk did!

After the show, Batista finally gets up, talks about Louisville and the OVW days before he starts screaming about how everyone's fat and retarded or something.

[Chojin]

A 15-year-old boy has accused WWE superstar Randy Orton of assault and battery on Tuesday night, and has filed a criminal complaint according to Press in Saugas, MA.

The boy accused Orton of spitting gum in his face and using profanity. Orton was also accused of saying "so sue me" when the boy's mother attempted to interject.

The incident is alleged to have taken place in the parking lot of Kowloon restaurant outside of Boston - a regular visiting spot for WWE stars when they are in the area.

Read more on the story at: www.wickedlocal.com/saugus

lol, i hate kids too :<

also wtf is wrong with this country.
THE BAD MAN SPIT AT ME AND CALLED ME NAMES
TIME TO GET THE LAW INVOLVED

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

They should have called the Big Boss Man to arrest Orton.

[Tadao]

lol, i hate kids too :<

also wtf is wrong with this country.
THE BAD MAN SPIT AT ME AND CALLED ME NAMES
TIME TO GET THE LAW INVOLVED

Yeah, that kid should have totally fought him. :rolleyes

[Chojin]

Yeah, that kid should have totally fought him. :rolleyes

or maybe just let it go and learn his lesson. WHAT ARE THE ODDS THE KID WAS BEING A PUNKASS AND DESERVED IT! A MILLION TO NONE, I'D WAGER

Orton looked like he got legitimately angry at Kofi at the end of his match on Monday:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4sSDT-iQgc#t=5m2s

It looks like Kofi was supposed to stay down for a punt, but kept getting back up. Orton then gives him a really stiff RKO and kirks out on him. Orton just got a #1 contendership spot, but instead of being smug or happy about it he's still pissed about something as he gets his hand raised.

This wouldn't be the first time Kofi's botched on Orton - back in November in Madison Square Garden, Orton was primed to punt Piper and Kofi was supposed to run in and save the day... only he comes in way too late, so Orton just sorta trots over to piper and toes at him, then gestures at the camera like "wtf"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rvk79jnvtNw#t=1m3s

Some are saying that it could be the end of Kofi's push - Ken Kennedy got fired after botching a move on Orton that could easily have reinjured his collarbone. Others are saying that Kofi refused to stay down for a punt so that he could still be in the Rumble.

[Tadao]

Oh yeah, I forgot.

WORDS CAN HURT TOO!

[Sam]

RANDY ORTON CAN'T GET IN TROUBLE FOR THAT INCIDENT WITH THE KID, THE VOICES TOLD HIM TO DO ITTTTTTTTTTT

[Tadao]

:roidjoke

[Guitar Woman]

CM Punk should really learn how to shave heads properly!

I don't see why he doesn't just set fire to his disciples' pompadours, he'd get the same results.

lol'd at the guy who yelled "GET YOUR MONEY BACK, THAT HAIRCUT SUCKS"

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I watched Smackdown last night for the 1st time in 7 years. It might be another 7 till the next time. Who is the Intercontinental champion that looks like Orlando Bloom?

[Chojin]

smackdown is pretty awful. raw is sometimes good.

[Guitar Woman]

Smackdown doesn't usually forget it's a wrestling show and is probably the best brand WWE's got right now, although Batista, Rey Mysterio, and Taker being the main event don't help it any.

Raw is a soap opera every episode, though. Miz needs to be around more and Evan Bourne needs to get squashed less.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I like Evan Bourne. I just wish he didn't have to always fight that one guy...Sheamus? I think he's RAW champ right now. The one that looks like he could be Test's fake Irish brother.

[Guitar Woman]

Holy shit, Brian Kendrick has crossed the fucking line and entered the Impact zone

/wooo/ knew it all along!

[Guitar Woman]

http://nightshade01.files.wordpress.com/2009/01/edge.jpg
ON THIS DAY
I SEE CLEARLY
EVERYTHING HAS COME TO LIFE

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

He kinda looks like a fat mountain man now though. Better than Cena or Batista winning.

[Sam]

Orton got screwed for SHHUURREEEE, and I'm glad Edge is finally back.

[Guitar Woman]

Evan Bourne was the first guy eliminated. :(

[Sam]

You making a sad face was the first thing that crossed my mind as he went over. :lol

[Chojin]

Evan Bourne was the first guy eliminated. :(

Well, he was bourne to fly :lol

I was tremendously disappointed in the matches leading up to the Rumble. Orton's match moreso than the others because you could see the ending coming a mile away and it still somehow came off as awkward and anti-climactic.

Punk stole the show at the Rumble proper, imo.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I showed my anti support for the women's championship match by wearing my NO MA'AM SHIRT.

[Guitar Woman]

http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/4619/1266392797695.jpg

Randy, you dick

Not a tremendous fan of ECW, but I feel like I should watch tonight just so I can say I was there. I'm more excited about everyone on the show becoming free agents, hopefully Raw will get someone I give a shit about finally.

[Pentegarn]

I watched Raw last night. Since I am years behind the events I was more than a bit confused. So I have a couple character/storyline questions:

Who the crap is Seamus? (besides the champ)

Is Randy Orton a face now? Or just the lesser of two heels between him and this Seamus guy?

Batista is Vince's lapdog now it looks like, but why?

[Sam]

NOTHING IS EVER WHAT IT SEEMS IN THE WWE

[Guitar Woman]

The two biggest questions I have are

Is Bryan Danielson going to teach the Miz how to wrestle?

and

A guido wrestler? Seriously?
http://img718.imageshack.us/img718/9743/1266436256541.jpg

[Sam]

IS BRYAN DANIELSON DOOMED TO SPEND HIS WWE CAREER STUCK AT LOW MID-CARD FIGHTING DOLPH ZIGGLER AND DREW MCINTYRE UNTIL HE LEAVES AND GOES BACK TO RoH?

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

RoHFL

[Angryhydralisk]

The two biggest questions I have are

Is Bryan Danielson going to teach the Miz how to wrestle?

and

A guido wrestler? Seriously?
http://img718.imageshack.us/img718/9743/1266436256541.jpg
FRIEZA!!! I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

[Pentegarn]

FRIEZA!!! I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

I thought that exact same thing :lol

[WhiteRat]

A friend of mine brought over the Ultimate Warrior DVD on saturday night. We knocked back a few beers and I laughed my ass off at the cut job they gave that fool. I had no idea how much a friggin' talentless tool he was. I especially like the horrible non-sell he gave HHH. Helmsley gave him a Pedigree and Warrior immediately popped back up. What a bum.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I read that they basically made the warrior dvd to further make a fool out of him. The Macho Man DVD is awesome though.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Watched TNA last night. Ric Flair and Hulk Hogan both need to do something else. I realized Sting would turn heel because he now has a goatee. Scott Hall should be added to the list of wrestlers who shouldn't talk.

See also: Randy Orton

Kevin Nash's hooligan friend is pretty awesome. I was hoping for Brooke Hogan to turn heel and doublecross the hulkster.

[Angryhydralisk]

Watched TNA last night. Ric Flair and Hulk Hogan both need to do something else. I realized Sting would turn heel because he now has a goatee. Scott Hall should be added to the list of wrestlers who shouldn't talk.

See also: Randy Orton

Kevin Nash's hooligan friend is pretty awesome. I was hoping for Brooke Hogan to turn heel and doublecross the hulkster.

I caught just that main event and thought "Tazz just quoted Michael Cole, didn't he? And it's either this or Superman Cena beating half the roster in 20 minutes."

Anyways, I just thought about it. Shawn Michaels, "Mr. Wrestlemania"...has a record of 6-10 (More losses than anyone else too come to think of it!).

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I missed all of RAW last night.

Also RVD came back and his entrance music is awesome. Basically just a Break down with ROB VAN DAM in between.

[Guitar Woman]

I was planning on going to Raw last night, but I thought it was further away and it's finals week, too.

I didn't care much for the show last night, anyway.

I really hope they stop using every name except Truth & Wisdom for JoMo and Truth. The rest of them are like, WCW cheesy.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Forgot....when we were watching the ric flair match when he got all bloodied in the face my friend was like "Flair looks like Christopher Lloyd just murdered someone" I was almost crying for 6 mins laughing so hard.

[Guitar Woman]

http://highspots.tv/london-kendrick-shoot-interview-preview/

:lol

"He's never hit me with a coconut."
"Yeah, what was the story behind that?"
"Nothin', he was on crack it turns out."

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Wrestlemania kinda sucked. The only things that were worth watching was HBK's last match and some guy had a sign in the crowd that said "BATISTA LIKES FISHSTICKS" which is non-sensical but more entertaining than the match at hand.

[Pentegarn]

Wrestlemania kinda sucked. The only things that were worth watching was HBK's last match and some guy had a sign in the crowd that said "BATISTA LIKES FISHSTICKS" which is non-sensical but more entertaining than the match at hand.

That is all we talked about for the rest of the PPV when me and my friends were watching it. :lol

[Chojin]

i liked the sign during the hbk vs taker match that said "this match sponsored by the AARP"

also, cena celebrating with the half of the crowd that hated him after his match, wearing a trollface

and the return of the orton pose! hell yeah brah

and swagger winning MITB! though knowing him, he'll be the first guy to fail to capitalize on it

[Guitar Woman]

What the fuck was with the Truth & Wisdom/ShowMiz match? Show just sucker punches JoMo and pins him three seconds in? Fuck, man.

My favorite thing about this PPV by far was Matt Striker's commentary. I lost it at him losing it at Kofi's LADDER STILTS.

And yeah, BATISTA LIKES FISHSTICKS was great, as was the resurrected \_O__/ and poor, poor Cena. :(

[Angryhydralisk]

WM 26 wasn't that great (Got out of work just in time to catch the hilariously bad Bret vs. Vince match), but still better than 25.

Oh, and NORWAY HATES CENA.

[Supafly345]

RY0NWLCvTGk

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

MacGruber blew up R Truth.

[Guitar Woman]

Aw, shit, say goodbye to that push, John.

[Chojin]

orton, you're supposed to get stronger during face pushes.

first thing i said to schimid when jomo got drafted was "guitar woman will be heartbroken"

[Guitar Woman]

Lawler must be the most completely confused, uninterested, bored-to-death ringside announcer ever

Did he have like a non-kayfabe stroke or something?

[Pentegarn]

I imagine he just pines for the old days when the personalities were much more interesting

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Did Orton RKO Meat Loaf last night for some reason?

Drove by the arena downtown today on my way to work...Smackdown taping tonight. I had to sell my ticket because MC Chris is playing down the street.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Some wrestler took someone hostage and then tortured him while demanding ransom. It ended up being no one important but I totally thought it was going to be New Jack.

A former Armenia wrestling champion has been convicted of kidnapping a man, beating him and demanding $1 million ransom.
A federal jury in Los Angeles found Vagan Adzhemyan (EDZ'-ih-mee-an) guilty on Monday. His first trial last year ended with a mistrial after the jury deadlocked.
The 42-year-old Adzhemyan admitted kidnapping Sandro Karmryan, beating him, shocking him with a stun gun, holding him captive for days and demanding a $1 million ransom from his family. Authorities say the kidnapping conspiracy ended with a SWAT team rescue of the near-death victim.
The Armenian-born Adzhemyan argued his actions were necessary because Karmryan was plotting to have him killed because he knew about an alleged loan scam.
Adzhemyan was a champion wrestler in Armenia and the Soviet Union in the 1980s.
His friend Galvin Gibson also was convicted in the plot.

[Angryhydralisk]

Lawler must be the most completely confused, uninterested, bored-to-death ringside announcer ever

Did he have like a non-kayfabe stroke or something?

I get a feeling when he's making the concerned look he's fearing Chris Hansen's in the crowd somewhere.

Also seen this recently in response to Mickie James being fired...

http://prowrestling.about.com/b/2010/05/07/mickie-james-fan-arrested-after-threatening-to-blow-up-wwe-headquarters.htm

[Chojin]

So in one night - Orton RKOs meatloaf, RKOs DiBiase, RKOs Edge, wins a handicap match against him clean and decisively, and then scares the Raw general manager into retiring.

COME AT ME BRO

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I really wanted Meatloaf to fly away on a motorcycle and be gone before the morning comes....but that didn't work out.

I missed the end of RAW but I'm glad to hear Vicky Guerrero is now jobless.

[Sam]

HE NEEDS TO RKO EVERY GUEST HOST.

[Chojin]

that may have been the worst ppv i've ever seen

and not just because orton somehow separated his shoulder by punching the ring

[Guitar Woman]

It was like December to Dismember, except nobody's face got exploded by a ladder.

But fuck, man, Orton RKOing every douchebag within a hundred foot radius is the only reason to watch Raw anymore, what the fuck am I supposed to do now?

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Can he rko himself?



I heard jon lovitz hosted last night.

[MLE]

Without posting spoilers, IT IS TIME TO START WATCHING AGAIN.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Randy Orton is a robot



http://wrestlecrap.com/headlies/021111/ortonrobot.jpg

http://wrestlecrap.com/headlies.html

[Pentegarn]

Without posting spoilers, IT IS TIME TO START WATCHING AGAIN.

^^^

This

[MLE]

This is changing the face of wrestling. Literally. Away from John Cena.

[Guitar Woman]

So, here's just what I know about wrestling off the top of my head, having not payed much attention for almost half a year:
Punk's involved with the Nexus somehow
John Cena pretended to be a mexican
JoMo is still a midcard spotmonkey
Miz got pushed to the moon and is WWE Champion
No more Chris Jericho :D
Orton is still being Orton
Dolph Ziggler loevs Vicky :x
Both Hardy brothers are fat

What else is happening, anything good?

[Pentegarn]

Just one thing. But it is so good it makes all the bad you have to tolerate to see it worth it

[Guitar Woman]

WELL WHAT IS IT?

[MLE]

it's SPOILERS and I'm being careful not to spoil because Eric's not caught up.

[MLE]

you should just watch this last monday's raw. It'll tell you everything

[Pentegarn]

Or you can get what you need by typing RAW 2/14 on youtube, you'll know the clip as soon as you see it

I'll put it this way, only one thing would make me want to start watching wrestling again, and that thing happened

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

WHAT IS IT! Spoil it for me, no youtubes where I'm at.

edit: looked it up

It's probably just so he can use "The Rock" when starring in films again though.

[Pentegarn]

However long he is back I will enjoy it. It's like being fed steak after a steady diet of SPAM

[Zhukov]

And nobody else thinks it's strange that people are using SPOILERS in the sports forum?

[Fathom Zero]

About professional wrestling. Professional wrestling. Professional wrestling.

[Pentegarn]

Yeah it is sweaty ballet. It has a plot like any other TV show, except the actors do their own stunts, and they have to be in shape.

Though by that logic it could technically be in the TV forum, but it is "sports entertainment" so in sports it sits

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Happy birthday Zhukov.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Also,

I saw a preview for the elimnation chamber match and they were using the howie scream for it.

[Pentegarn]

I officially cannot wait for the next Wrestlemania

[Zhukov]

Thanks 10k. In the Wrestling thread where I would see it no less.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I figured you would check the spoiler at least for it.

[Chojin]

i'm current up through the 14th now, still have to watch the ppv and raw...which prlly won't happen until next week so i'll be 3 shows behind again

hell yeah rock, i wish WWE hadn't spoiled your return for me in an email. trips too.

[Guitar Woman]

THE ROCK has COME BACK.... home.

There's something in my eye.

[Chojin]

i would be able to take him more seriously if he'd actually show up on television

[Pentegarn]

But he brings it via satellite.

[Pentegarn]

So while my GF and I were waiting for the 2 really bad one sided basketball games yesterday to end so I could watch the much closer late games, I decided to watch SmackDown. While watching it I had my all time favorite Freudian Slip ever.

The set up: The promo for the John Morrison, Trish Stratus, Snookie, vs. those other peeps match.

GF: "Is that the same Snookie I hear about on the radio morning shows?"

me: "Yep, she is on Jersey Snore"

I intended to say "Jersey Shore", but obviously my subconscious had other ideas :lol

[Pentegarn]

Surprised nobody is talking about Wrestlemania yet

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I left my friends house after the undertaker match. I'm think that when taker finally does lose at wrestlemania they will have everyone who he defeated at prior WM's come to the ring and carry him away in a coffin.

[Pentegarn]

I can't believe this freaking happened by the way:

ed0LaWLy5N8

1) watch this quick I expect as soon as WWE is aware of it it till be removed

2) far be it for me to give Snooki credit for anything, but I was shocked. I don't know exactly what I was expecting, but it was not that.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Awww, I'm at work. What is it of?

[Pentegarn]

Snooki's 20 seconds in the ring, where she did not just wrestling moves, but ones that require actual athleticism, one move was luchador level

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Awwe. It was taken down by the time I got home.

[Pentegarn]

OK I think i like insane R-Truth

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

My roommate told me how he was all like "WHEN AN ANGRY BLACK MAN IS SPEAKING YOU BEST B LISTENING." I feel his pain as an angry black man who nobody listens to.

[Pentegarn]

Qa1rjCZxtxo

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I was watching the Bruce Bruce standup with my ex girlfriend once and was laughing my ass off. She's like "I have no idea what he's saying. I can't even understand him."

I'm like " How do you understand me then?" She's was like "I don't listen to you."

[Pentegarn]

So my brother's favorite thing about wrestling now is when Kharma comes out and beats up the other divas

[MLE]

I love Awesome Kong.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Awesome Kong is preggers.

[Pentegarn]

Taking bets on it being a storyline and she loses the baby because of a diva/divas and goes apeshit and back to rampaging on the other divas

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

lol, I'm surprised at how many misscarriages they've had over the years. One can only hope that her being pregnant will be a storyline that will involve val venis.

[MLE]

For my new job I ended up rooming with Ruckus's girlfriend. She's actually super nice.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I hit on her like only a 16 year old could.

http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c375/Locke9999/IMG_20110608_210258.jpg

[Pentegarn]

OK I think i like insane R-Truth

I now KNOW I like the new insane R-Truth

[Sam]

I hit on her like only a 16 year old could.

http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c375/Locke9999/IMG_20110608_210258.jpg

DAWN MARIE CAN GET IT.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I was all like "dawn marie. Wheres my dong at dong"

[MailCall]

I was disappointed at Vince McMahon last night. Cena was just begging to join the Kiss My Ass Club.

[Pentegarn]

Raw was actually pretty good last night I thought

[All Hail Duke]

tuned in last night for the first time in 3-4 years, some of it was ok but the strap is never off cena for long and that shit is why i stopped watching it in the first place

and when did michael cole become both a heel and a wrestler?

[Pentegarn]

He is the heel announcer now (I still think the King would be better for heel announcer, he could be both heel and likable, Cole cannot) and they decided to have him and King have a storyline around Wrestlemania.

As for Cena being champ excessively, I think that ending showed someone else can carry the strap and be beloved by the fans for it

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

You guys are missing the most important point of business from raw last night.


KEITH STONE

[MailCall]

In the following video C.M. Punk explains his return, from Monday Night Raw. The interesting thing here is the fan reaction. It's almost like the fans have no idea what the hell they want.
http://vids.wwe.com/12766/raw-cm-punk-explains-his-return

[WhiteRat]

MuV42vw-1gs

[Nick]

Snooki's 20 seconds in the ring, where she did not just wrestling moves, but ones that require actual athleticism, one move was luchador level
Man, I didn't expect that either. Here's a clip of the whole match if anyone wants to see what he was talking about.

uPSuP1HbhDI
Seems Snooki used to be a cheerleader in highschool.

[MailCall]

I think the storyline between Punk and Cena is actually well thought out on second thought. Punk is the antithesis of Cena...a kind-of "bad guy you route for." Versus Cena as the "All-American" type. If the WWE brass was going for this they made the right decision imo.

[WhiteRat]

I think the storyline between Punk and Cena is more like guy who is not a raging douche bag vs. guy who is a raging douche bag that no self respecting human being over the age of 6 should ever cheer for.

[MailCall]

Good point. But it is about money. And a huge portion of the wrestling fan base is younger. Makes me wonder where they're going with the new RKO vs. Mark Henry deal.

[MailCall]

Turns out Stephanie McMahon has HHH's balls in her purse.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Mark henry forever

http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c375/Locke9999/IMG_20110918_194100.jpg

[MLE]

SOMBODY'S GONN GET THEY ASS KICKED

[ThrashO]

now... no offense to ANYONE... but...

I really want to know the appeal to any of this.

[Sam]

SOMBODY GONNA GET DEY WIG SPLIT

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Also R Truth and the miz should have won. They also deserve the key to the city. Fort Knox and a jetlev because they have so much charisma.

[MLE]

The AWESOME TRUTH

[ThrashO]

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y293/BlingShyne2/1316630260138.gif

[WhiteRat]

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y293/BlingShyne2/1316630260138.gif

You need some more botchamania in your life:

wqT_c3kEi2o

[MailCall]

http://img850.imageshack.us/img850/2725/cobrasantino1.th.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/850/cobrasantino1.jpg/)

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c375/Locke9999/Randy-Orton4.jpg

[MailCall]

^^ Ha! Somebody was chewing on his head!!

[Pentegarn]

You're talking about Chojin's man crush there

[Pentegarn]

So last night on Raw, a bunch of silly, cartoonish, pun making, outrageous, goofball creatures were on acting ridiculous. Also the Muppets were on Raw.

[MailCall]

So last night on Raw, a bunch of silly, cartoonish, pun making, outrageous, goofball creatures were on acting ridiculous. Also the Muppets were on Raw.
My new favorite wrestler on WWE:
http://img585.imageshack.us/img585/8528/beakermuppet1.th.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/585/beakermuppet1.jpg/)

[Sam]

YEAH, I LIKE SHEAMUS TOO

[Pentegarn]

YEAH, I LIKE SHEAMUS TOO

uhFniiuj77Y

[ThrashO]

My new favorite wrestler on WWE:
http://img585.imageshack.us/img585/8528/beakermuppet1.th.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/585/beakermuppet1.jpg/)

i fapped

[Pentegarn]

So Chris Jericho came out to the cheers of thousands, cried, said nothing, then left the ring. I say he is pregnant

u5oqFJc7FII

[All Hail Duke]

flipping through the channels and saw that *shrug*

haven't been watching this much, the only thing i've been catching is cm punk and this recycled mcmahon vs austin storyline but with him and laurenitis

[Pentegarn]

cm punk and this recycled mcmahon vs austin storyline but with him and laurenitis

Glad I am not the only one who noticed this. It is like they are desperate to recreate the attitude era. Thing is that happened organically, the right personalities at the right time with the right competition caused it. You can't recreate that.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I was upset that the road dogg was unlimited from the royal rumble. Mostly because he was entered into the royal rumble.

I did enjoy the funkosaurus though.

[Pentegarn]

I did not expect Raw to end like that

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

What happened?

[Pentegarn]

Just as HHH was about to fire John Laringytis The Undertaker came down to the ring. He looked at HH and did his thumb across the throat motion. HHH patted Taker on shoulder and left the ring and it faded with Taker looking at the Wrestelmania sign

*spoilered in case Chojin hasn't watched it yet

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Is larignitis a real person? I thought it was a cameo by Robert Patrick. I don't watch it all that often.

[Pentegarn]

Is larignitis a real person? I thought it was a cameo by Robert Patrick. I don't watch it all that often.Laurinaitis

He is related to the Road Warrior Animal and the linebacker James Laurinaitis

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Since I've missed wrestling for the decade. Has the rock ever used a signature submission move?

[All Hail Duke]

he's used the sharpshooter in the past

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Dammit. Did they call it they call it the scorpion king deathlock by chance? That's my idea.

[Pentegarn]

No but they really should have

[Mike Tobacco]

The rise of this Ryback character has fascinated me the past couple weeks; so I'm dusting off this thread to see if anyone is paying attention to fake wrestling, and, if so, does anyone think Ryback is beating CM Punk for the championship on Sunday.

[All Hail Duke]

i flip between raw and shows i actually watch during commercial breaks

eh, ryback just looks like goldberg 3.0, and punk'll probably win

[Mike Tobacco]

From a Goldberg knockoff to a Nexus knockoff now. WWE continues to do just enough to keep me checking it out in spite of myself. Any thoughts on The Shield? Looks like they're just gonna be lackeys for CM Punk to me.

[All Hail Duke]

no idea
i'm gonna guess that vince'll find out about them working for heyman, and he'll "fire" them or something, then they'll do something to get contracts or something predictable

[Mike Tobacco]

Thanks to CM Punk getting his knee scoped it looks like The Shield is gonna be forced into service early with a match at TLC. Crazy how many new faces are getting facetime while dudes like Rey Mysterio and Randy Orton are largely MIA. WWE is like a rebuilding baseball team, which is probably past due anyway.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Thanks to CM Punk getting his knee scoped it looks like The Shield is gonna be forced into service early with a match at TLC.

Crazy how many new faces are getting facetime while dudes like Rey Mysterio and Randy Orton are largely MIA.

WWE is like a rebuilding baseball team, which is probably past due anyway.

READ: TERRIBLE PEOPLE NOT GETTING WORK.

[All Hail Duke]

mysterio isn't terrible, shame on you

[Nick]

I liked Mysterio better when he was in the WCW. I liked Wrestling a lot better back then as well. WWE seems like manbaby soap operas to me now.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Yeah, he was way better as rey mysterio jr.

I feel really bad for saying this but the only reason he got a big push in the wwe is because eddie died.

[Nick]

Well, that and they don't have any real big time hispanic wrestlers right now.

Also the reason he's not Rey Mysterio Jr anymore is because he let WcW do that storyline where they unmasked him. His father let him have his name so he could keep wrestling with a mask.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Oh I know. He still sucks now though.

Somewhat on the same topic I just found a la parka porn....which is awesome.

[Sam]

LA PAWESOME

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I went to monday night raw. Waiting to get in and I saw these lesbians kiss each other on the mouth. I told my friend then pointed them out in case it happened again. Then we found out one was a guy. Then we found out it was a younger guy. Then we found out that was probably a mother and a son. Then we found out the son might have been slow.

I don't think I've ever felt a boner dissolve quite that bad before.

[Tadao]

What did you expect at a WWE show? Yes, I understand that you are a long ways from sin city and that this was the entrance line, but that's like me wondering what's going on in the line to get into the rave.

[Tadao]

also I saw a Chyna giving head clip and it was wonderful.

[All Hail Duke]

I went to monday night raw. Waiting to get in and I saw these lesbians kiss each other on the mouth. I told my friend then pointed them out in case it happened again. Then we found out one was a guy. Then we found out it was a younger guy. Then we found out that was probably a mother and a son. Then we found out the son might have been slow.



wow, ha ha

[Mike Tobacco]

This inbred Duck Dynasty meets Deliverance team they keep showing videos for looks interesting. Too bad most everything else is shitty.

[Chojin]

Last sunday they had an "eye for an eye" match, where you win by gouging out your opponent's eye. They used an awful golfball eye prop, because of course they did. Cowards.

I haven't watched in a while again, but sporting events in general got super stuffed by covid. WWE has an edge in that they can do some creative taped matches in stupid locations like spooky barns to compensate, but you can only do so much with a show that is 90% about audience participation.

[All Hail Duke]

I gave up on them 6+ years ago, switched to NJPW, but they got kicked off tv so I switched to AEW, but haven't watched them in a month

I read up on wwe online

The best wrestling related program thus far has been dark side of the ring