***asterisklexia***

[Stark]

Strange disease sweeps crappy message board
Sep 22, 12:02 PM EDT
By Remy Forbnarb - Associated Press Writer

A strange infection is spreading through a little known message board called 'i-mockery.net' that seems to be dedicated to outdated video games and 'yo momma' style banter. The disease causes unwary victims to place increasing amounts of asterisks in their posts with little regard for style or moderation. This alone wouldn't be cause for alarm but the condition seems to cause rabid politcal enthusiasts from both sides of the spectrum to repeat redundant information and ignore repeated pleas to stfu. It also causes them to repeat themselves.

Symptoms include:

-inflamed sense of one-upmanship
-squinty eyes
-short term memory loss
-loss of IQ
-hackneyed discourse
-whippity-scrotum
-false pride in convoluted 'activism'
-short term memory loss

If you find yourself suffering from some or all of these symptoms please contact a physician immediately. And stfu.

[glowbelly]

this thread should be deleted!!

[FS]

I agree

[Stark]

can't stand a li'l critisism? or is this some form of sarcasm?

[glowbelly]

how about you try reading


THIS THREAD RIGHT FUCKING HERE (http://www.i-mockery.net/viewtopic.php?t=14530)

before you start making accusations.

RULE BREAKER >:

BANNED!!

[ziggytrix]

No fair hiding new rules in a non-stickied thread. :(

[glowbelly]

you want some of this?

[kellychaos]

Why you wanna get all up in ma grill, girl?

[ziggytrix]

i didn't do nuthin. you can't prove anythin.

[ziggytrix]

imaginary edit: prove nuttin

[AChimp]

HEY JERK. >:

I'm a vet. I can whip my scrotum anywhere I please. >:

[Anonymous]

I'm just waiting for the moment this literary genious spams whatever site he's undoubtedly pushing so I can formally show him the door.

[Terra]

Well before you show him/her the door I would like to hear more about "whippity scrotum."

[Carnivore]

Hey, Stark >:

Yo momma!

[Stark]

I'm just waiting for the moment this literary genious spams whatever site he's undoubtedly pushing so I can formally show him the door.

Think you could stop playing kick the noob long enough to explain that?

[glowbelly]

he means that he definitely wants you to post a link to your favorite website. repeatedly...and in as many threads as you can in 30 minutes.

start...

NOW!!

[Terra]

Think you could stop playing kick the noob long enough to explain that?

Unfortunately Stark any comment from a vet doesn't require any explanation. One is a "vet" if they are from the old boards and everybody else is a noob and noobs come here to mock and defend themselves as best they can. Weak noobs whither away and leave and the obnoxious noobs stick around and create fodder for the vets to feed off of. Once in a while a noob bounces a good zinger off a vet thereby making his/her fall from grace all the sweeter in the eyes of the other noobs and this spooks the vet cattle somewhat. They get jumpy and rattled for a bit. If a noob gets zinged constantly, they develop a callus and continue to post. After all, it IS a mockery forum and you, I and other noobs are the food. But WE are the reason the vets are here so take that as a small consolation when your ass is getting shot off by people around here.

Some noobs are completely ignorant, giving the rest of us noobs that much more work to do in order to take up the slack. These noobs must die, either at their own hands or at the hands of the other noobs for they are so cancerous that even the vets cannot touch them and the other outlying noobs must eat them. Try not to fall into this category or I'll, upper echelon noob that I am (for you see, even WE have rank and file order among us) make a banquet out of you.

You seem fine however. Don't ask questions, be watchful and learn from the banter of the other posts and you'll do fine. Oh, TRY not to start any threads if your new. This is your first mistake but your still okay, I got your back. Stay clear of emoticons as those pesky vets like to use them. This is their subterfuge you see. They will use emoticons to distract you while they are slicing off your dick and feeding it to the other vets.

While your cavorting around the forum, please check out my titty thread and also weigh in on the penis thread in the Loveline forum. This will get you bigass bonus points in the long run. All the smart people go there.

Welcome and keep your eyes open, you miserable shit! :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

[Stark]

okay let me review

-smart people in penis thread
-titties
-don't respect others and they will respect you