Crash test mommy

[Jonathan Clement]

Gawd, I HATE that show.

The whole damned thing is staged. Parenting is NOT that hard. I gaurantee you that it's an attempt by fanatic homosexuals to discourage people from having kids so they don't have any obstacle to having their damned same sex marriage.

What kind of person with any brains in their head scheduels every important thing to go on all at the same time? Let me get this striaght: Parenting is having sleep-overs with 10 kids plus your own kids, home renovations, sports, all in the same DAY? And houshold that runs like that is a result of sloppy schedueling.

And since when do you play parenting games? There's no such thing as "Cuss ball", in which every time you swear, that's a "base" you run to, and then, when you get to "home", you get a "strike". 3 strikes, and you don't get some get away. No. Parenting doesn't have games like that. And since when do you have a relay races with tea? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU RUNNING TO A STUPID PLANT WITH THE TEA AND BACK FOR?! In less than a minute! Why don't you just GIVE THE KIDS THE DAMNED TEA?! Why do you collect the food that spills off the kids plate and if it's below a certain point, you get a getaway?

I also know this show is staged. And why are you trying to parent all by yourself? Arn't you gonna have a SPOUSE to help? Why, yes you are. You're going to have a spouse who's the same gender as you. Yes, one episode, there was a lesbian couple on there... One time, but it still pisses me off. (I don't want to get in any debates here. I am just stating my opinions here.)

And kids arn't THAT whiny. Of COURSE they're gonna be hard to take care of because THEY'RE NOT YOUR OWN! You're NOT USED TO THEM! You DON'T KNOW WHAT THEIR ROUTINE IS!

And one last point of note, they have the SAME DAMNED TUNE OVER AND OVER AGAIN! I swear to god, if I hear that melody one more time, I'm gonna go NUTS!

But it's reality TV, so what would you expect?

[Pub Lover]

Sure thing, Bubbleboy. :)

[Mike P]

My god, but you're filled with hate for television shows meant for an entirely different demographic than you.

[Jonathan Clement]

Lol. Those shows are MADE for mockery!

[Emu]

John, is this you? http://photos1.blogger.com/img/243/952/1024/J%20Clement%20anime.jpg

[Chojin]

Jesus would be proud.

[Jonathan Clement]

No, that's not me. THIS is me. http://www.freewebs.com/jonathanclement/107-0762_IMG.JPG

[Spectre X]

Fag.

[Sacks]

That couch looks pretty comfortable. Like the kind of couch everyone would gather upon on a crisp Christmas mourn. Laughing and giggling, just generally being gay as they opened presents and popped those festive poppers with the little prizes inside. Everyone would laugh as gramps would put on his colorful paper crown and kind of dance around the room with gram-gram to those old Bing records... Just like they used to all those years ago. Then as they're caught up in the moment he'll kiss her good and hard, right on the lips... Just like old times... Just like he oughta.

[Supafly345]

Do you live in a sort of huntershack/ theatre stage Jonathan?

[Marc Summers]

I'll have you know that Anime kept me from going down a horrible path to hell.

Anime tought me to be kind to women and treat them with respect. I may have turned out to be an abusive husband who drinks, smokes does drugs and god knows what.

Anime showed me the true joy of having a family.

Anime is one of my biggest sources of motovation. I get my schoolwork done to some pretty anime girl happy.

Anime may have kept me from commiting suicide. If I can't have love in the real world, I can at least dream and have the girl who suits me perfectly.

Anime is one of my only means of escaping this rotton sinful world.

As you can see, anime is a good thing and when it is gone, I must die. Let me make a few things clear.

If you keep letting on you're a real organization, I will kill you.
If you deny you're a par0dy, I will kill you.
If you edit my reply so I look possed or like some raving loonatic, I will kill you.
If you don't answer question straight and forward without going into a bunch uninterperatable shit, I will kill you.

Is that understood?

This may surprise you, but I am indeed very hurt by this website.

But I'll certainly admit one thing, though. You guys look like saints compared to landover baptist. They let on they're christians, but infact, it's some hateful athiest sleezbag. I mean, you should see that website. They turn the words par0dy, sat1re, j0ke, into "Divine revelation" and "Wonderful baptist church.

Anyway, I'm starting to ramble So I'd better rap this up.

In summary, Anime good, Alcohol bad... Landover evil...

Remember what I said. Try anything funny and I'll kill you. And that's not a threat. That's a promice.

-Jonathan

All this before he's even 13 (the same number of cats he owns :eek)

[Spectre X]

All but the most cognitively challenged can detect Landover Baptist for what it actyually is: A satire site.

[Jonathan Clement]

I knew landover was a joke this whole time. And the joke part isn't what bothers me. It's the fact that they try to HIDE it's a a joke. THe only place they say it is hidden in a bunch of legal shit. And if you say it on your message board, they edit your threads to make YOU look satanic. Just the other day, I posted "Let's play a game! It's called "Let's piss of this guy!" I bet you can't do it!" And then, the next day, I find it's been turned into "Let's look at gay porn!" I can't believe in a great country like America, people are allowed to post whatever kind of hatespeech they want...

P.S., It's not a couch. It's 2 recliners side by side. And no, I live in a pretty normal house...

[Emu]

The fact that you're getting angry about it just lends to the power of the joke. That's what it's there to do. Besides, satire isn't hate speech. If you don't want hate speech, shouldn't you be making petitions to take down REAL hate speech sites like godhatesfags.com?

[Sacks]

I knew landover was a joke this whole time. And the joke part isn't what bothers me. It's the fact that they try to HIDE it's a a joke. THe only place they say it is hidden in a bunch of legal shit. And if you say it on your message board, they edit your threads to make YOU look satanic. Just the other day, I posted "Let's play a game! It's called "Let's piss of this guy!" I bet you can't do it!" And then, the next day, I find it's been turned into "Let's look at gay porn!" I can't believe in a great country like America, people are allowed to post whatever kind of hatespeech they want...

P.S., It's not a couch. It's 2 recliners side by side. And no, I live in a pretty normal house...

Well that settles it. Christmas is cancelled.

[Immortal Goat]

I can't believe in a great country like America, people are allowed to post whatever kind of hatespeech they want...


Yes, one episode, there was a lesbian couple on there... One time, but it still pisses me off
Hmm. They didn't teach "hypocrisy" in preschool yet, Johnny?

[Jonathan Clement]

There was never a lesbian couple in any anime I've ever seen... What are you talking about? And what's with all the flippy avatars? They're so irritating... Yes, so entertaining... lol... Flippy!
BEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFF
BEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFF
BEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFF
BEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFF
BEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFF
BEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFF
BEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFF
BEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFF
BEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFF
BEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFF
BEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFFBEEFJERKYJERKOFF!! !

[Jonathan Clement]

Oh, THAT'S what your talking about. I got this confused with the DDAAF forum.

[Supafly345]

We <3 Sam I guess.

[Chojin]

Make out with me, Jonathan.

[Emu]

Imagine the guy in your avatar saying that :lol

[Chojin]

Dad's had a hard day at work.

[Sacks]

There was never a lesbian couple in any anime I've ever seen... What are you talking about? And what's with all the flippy avatars? They're so irritating... Yes, so entertaining... lol... Flippy!
(nicotine fit)

Tenchi Muyo, Sailor Moon, Dirty Pair, Love Hina, Ranma 1/2, Bubblegum Crisis, Digimon, Digimon Tamers, Fruits Basket, Gundam Wing, .hack/Sign, Evangelion, Yu Yu Hakusho, Revolutionary Girl Utena, and Cowboy Bebop. Now Bebop wasn't really a chick thing, it was more gay dudes and crossdressing, but I know how you feel about that so I'd throw it in there. I'm also relatively sure there was some gay going on in DBZ. Jonathan Clement, you know dick about anime.

[Jonathan Clement]

Curses and ignorance don't count. And I wasn't taking a fit... I think BEEFJERKYJERKOFF sounds funny! Esspecially when you say it fast... By the way, sacks, that audio of Wee 3 was actually pretty good! Will you please make an audio of this one?

[Emu]

Wait, what?

[Sacks]

Yeah.. what?

[Marc Summers]

There was never a lesbian couple in any anime I've ever seen... What are you talking about? And what's with all the flippy avatars? They're so irritating... Yes, so entertaining... lol... Flippy!
(nicotine fit)

Tenchi Muyo, Sailor Moon, Dirty Pair, Love Hina, Ranma 1/2, Bubblegum Crisis, Digimon, Digimon Tamers, Fruits Basket, Gundam Wing, .hack/Sign, Evangelion, Yu Yu Hakusho, Revolutionary Girl Utena, and Cowboy Bebop. Now Bebop wasn't really a chick thing, it was more gay dudes and crossdressing, but I know how you feel about that so I'd throw it in there. I'm also relatively sure there was some gay going on in DBZ. Jonathan Clement, you know dick about anime.

Hey now don't forget the incest in Full Metal Panic: The Second Raid.

[Sacks]

There was never a lesbian couple in any anime I've ever seen... What are you talking about? And what's with all the flippy avatars? They're so irritating... Yes, so entertaining... lol... Flippy!
(nicotine fit)

Tenchi Muyo, Sailor Moon, Dirty Pair, Love Hina, Ranma 1/2, Bubblegum Crisis, Digimon, Digimon Tamers, Fruits Basket, Gundam Wing, .hack/Sign, Evangelion, Yu Yu Hakusho, Revolutionary Girl Utena, and Cowboy Bebop. Now Bebop wasn't really a chick thing, it was more gay dudes and crossdressing, but I know how you feel about that so I'd throw it in there. I'm also relatively sure there was some gay going on in DBZ. Jonathan Clement, you know dick about anime.

Hey now don't forget the incest in Full Metal Panic: The Second Raid.

Very astute, Marc. I'm sure theres tons more, this list is just something I threw together with the aid of a young girl keen on lesbianism in Japanese animation.

[Blaber66]

Yeah, there's Sailor Moon Jon. You son of a bitch. *Molests smiley face* :)

[Jeanette X]

Parenting is NOT that hard. I gaurantee you that it's an attempt by fanatic homosexuals to discourage people from having kids so they don't have any obstacle to having their damned same sex marriage.

What did you say about "hate speech"? I wasn't listening.

[Chojin]

Sacks, I'm pretty sure about 2/3rds of those shows don't have the kind of content you're describing.

[Sacks]

What kind of content am I describing? The kid just said lesbians. I suspect they don't have to be writhing against eachother's naked bodies for this to apply.

[Chojin]

Yeah, but all the same, I remain confident that most of them don't include that.

Although the writhing and nude thing is covered by Utena.

[Sacks]

Which ones specifically are you having doubts about?

Edit: Also, I'm pretty sure some of those just have some regular old gayness going on, dude on dude if you know what I'm saying, which may lead to some confusion.

[Chojin]

Dirty Pair, Love Hina, Ranma 1/2, and Evangelion are the only ones I have a working knowledge of :\

[pizzaslut]

Mr Clement
I have not seen the show , but I want to know one thing. When does a kid decide that parenting isn't that hard? Did you start reproducing at 10 or somthing? How many kids do you have? Please tell me how hard it is for you so we can share our experiences.

[Jonathan Clement]

I told you: You're going to know your children from the DAY THEY ARE BORN so you'll be USED TO them! You're not gonig to raise them ALONE! You'll have a SPOUSE to help! You DON'T cram everything together in one day. You don't have this "Do this in under 1 minute" type crap. I KNOW parenting is hard, but it's not NEARLY as hard as THEY depict it.

[Immortal Goat]

Yup. Forget "the talk", smoking, friends of the wrong element, rebelliousness, general ignorance,failing grades, risky behavior, drugs, drinking, driving, girl/boyfriends, and all that other stuff. That's CHILD'S PLAY compared to a TIMED RACE!

Moron.

[Jonathan Clement]

Yes, I know about all that, but they make a mockery of parenting. It's very disrespectful to parents.

[Sacks]

You know what?! YOU'RE very disrespectful to parents!

[Emu]

i wish jon would come back ;-;