What did I miss?

[AChimp]

Please post a bullet point summary of all the things that have occurred while I haven't been posting.

Thanks!

[Tadao]

CiG and I are now lovers.

[bigtimecow]

did you miss 10kvg's baby mama crazy bitch identity theft drama?

[Grislygus]

shrubfest has officially been paired with Sam and memorialized in an offical I-Mockery portrait; eshoulim was distraught

[Grislygus]

and Tadao is a mod now

[RaNkeri]

Miami Vice is still awesome

[The Leader]

EVIL ROBOT STILL RULES

[Pentegarn]

You missed everything TheCoolinator posted in Politics, you missed Microshock's meltdown post x-mas, Chojin hitting him with the banhammer, and him never coming back

[Esuohlim]

I-Mock Orgyfest 2010 was a hit I guess

[elx]

I AM CLASS PRESIDENT NOWWWWWWW

[The Leader]

I thought you were the treasurer.

[Fathom Zero]

I'm still not good. :(

[Sam]

ELX IS MY DAUGHTER

[Dimnos]

You didn't miss anything. We missd you. :(

[AChimp]

Sounds like there was a lot going on! :O

[Colonel Flagg]

Same old same old.

[Pentegarn]

did you miss 10kvg's baby mama crazy bitch identity theft drama?

That is still in the unresolved status too last I checked.

10k, what's the news? She still preggers? You force her to get that paternity test? She have to go to trial for the theft yet?

[AChimp]

THREAD LINK PLS.

Is this in Loveline? Shit I gotta read about that now.

[Pentegarn]

It started here:

http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69703811

Then she read this thread:

http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69701432

And there was a bit of action in the chat thread too, but I forget where exactly

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I still don't know. She might be pregnant but now she's not sure whose it is. Last time she tried to contact me was around march 17th. She had to go to court for stealing the 3 grand from me. Then got released. She then got arrested again because she also stole from her ex roommate and her mother. She called me a son of a birch. She then got released to the custody of her parents but then skipped out and is currently on the lam. There are warrants out for her. That's as far as I know though. I don't think the police are looking too hard for her though.

[Pentegarn]

That mess might be raising a child :(

Can you say, "Next Unibomber"?

[The Leader]

Can you say, "Jonathan Clement?"

[Sam]

Can you say, "Sam Jr?"

:(

[AChimp]

LOL that thread is pure gold.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

She's lurking now >:

Also had to reject a facebook friend request.

Apparently when you mention someone stupid they pick up on it.

[Pentegarn]

She probably googles herself like KGP4death :lol

EDIT: Or she googles you Bill :hypno

[Sam]

I BET TADAO TOLD HER SOMEONE WAS TALKING ABOUT HER

[Evil Robot]

Cig got an infection and went to a quack doctor.

[Tadao]

RanKeri is graduating from Medical School or some shit like that.

[Darryl]

Kitsa had a baby :eek

[RaNkeri]

Using frozen piss is a good way to get back at your enemies

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Flagg hit a deer.

[Dimnos]

Dont forget Willie died and now haunts the forums from time to time. :tear

[Skulhedface]

I miss way too much, so I pick and choose what I read. This is another contributing factor to my post count limit (it's hard to butt in when you have no idea what everyone's talking about without reading a thousand years of backstory). Sorry about your ex, 10KvG, but that was pretty goddamn epic.

[Colonel Flagg]

He should write a book about it. Fictional, of course, because no one would believe it actually happened that way.

Oh, by the way, George showed up for a few weeks, relegated a great story about his "lovely" ex(?)-wife, then just on the cusp of the story's conclusion crapped out on us. Probably offed by his ex, the way things sounded. :(

And elx is my granddaughter.

[AChimp]

LINK TO GEORGE'S STORY PLS.

[Tadao]

http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/search.php?searchid=328282

:rolleyes

[Colonel Flagg]

Damn. Late again. (that's what she said ...) :\

Or not? (http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69703440&page=1)

[Pentegarn]

Oh yeah, George and his unfinished symphony

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Wish there were a way to summon people who we actually wanted here.

[AChimp]

I just read that whole story thread. I miss talking to george. :(

[Terra]

I miss george too.

I had a baby and my tits blew to kingdom come. Now they just bob and float like a couple of airbags on a string tether.

Oh well.

[AChimp]

If you use the right kind of bra, guys won't notice until it's too late and they're sagging all over their face.

[Terra]

If you use the right kind of bra, guys won't notice until it's too late and they're sagging all over their face.

My nefarious plan is to smother them before they cum.

[The Leader]

:orgasm

[Tadao]

With your baby sized vagina? :eek

[Pentegarn]

My nefarious plan is to smother them before they cum.

Wasn't that the chick from Goldeneye's MO?

[Fathom Zero]

Xenia choked guys with her legs.

And I knew since I was twelve that that was how I wanted to die.

[Pentegarn]

Xenia choked guys with her legs.

And I knew since I was twelve that that was how I wanted to die.

I'm 34 and that's still how I want to die

[Terra]

Wasn't that the chick from Goldeneye's MO?

I'm not sure, but I always want to slap a guy around with my skanky tits and and then crush the air out of them (the guy, not the airbags).

[Dixie]

i died, then i came back to life as a zombie starfish.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I want a Zombie Starfish.

[kahljorn]

SO THAT WAS YOU IN SUPER MARIO BROTHERS

:O

[Chojin]

i lost a bunch of weight and went to college

not necessarily in that order

[AChimp]

What are you taking?

I bought a house and work a lot.

[Guitar Woman]

I got HPPD and started chainsmoking

Also I bought a race car and promptly rear-ended a mexican maid in a pickup truck, lol

[The Leader]

So Guitar Woman is still as dumb as he was when you left.

[Chojin]

What are you taking?

names, and kicking asses

[Evil Robot]

About six months ago I bumped the thread "an achimp christmas" and some asshole mod deleted it.

[Evil Robot]

three months ago not six

[Supafly345]

I remember back 7 years ago I hated Achimp, now I get excited to see him. :grownups

[Supafly345]

So Guitar Woman is still as dumb as he was when you left.
I am not a friend of GW, but I am kinda getting tired of the pointless bullying of him. Especially when it comes from all the people on the forum that I like.

[Guitar Woman]

Haters gonna hate, you mad cuz you ain't

Although really I have no idea why I still post here, since everyone I like has vanished into the ether

[Chojin]

hey

[Guitar Woman]

fuck you kid you're a dick

[The Leader]

I am not a friend of GW, but I am kinda getting tired of the pointless bullying of him. Especially when it comes from all the people on the forum that I like.
Well maybe you should tell him to not be so stupid. :rolleyes

[Guitar Woman]

Leader what the fuck are you even doing, I've been here like twice as long as you

Get in line, noob

[The Leader]

Thank you for proving my point. :>

[bigtimecow]

i graduated!

[Kitsa]

If only I could apply i-mock forum rules to real life. I could go around kicking little kids' asses and going, I'VE BEEN HERE LONGER FGT.

[Sethomas]

Kitsa, I think that prerogative is why people people whose lives amount to nothing are so sentimental about their senior year of high school. Internet forums were created because doing the "Matthew McConaughey from Dazed and Confused" thing doesn't work out too well in real life.

To the point of this thread: Umm. I made a few posts in recent days after a nearly two-year reprieve, and a few hours ago I met CiG with her beau at a hookah bar. I think the only other mockers I've met in person have been Swamper (in 2003 and 2008) and TheApportioner (in 2007), neither of whom have posted in some time as far as I know.

Now she has to come and be like, "That guy is a JERK."

[Skulhedface]

I may have a second kid coming along!

[Dixie]

If only I could apply i-mock forum rules to real life. I could go around kicking little kids' asses and going, I'VE BEEN HERE LONGER FGT.

i learned that that doesn't work at family gatherings. but that doesn't mean i won't try.

and seth is not a jerk, seth is still awesome.

[kahljorn]

wasn't achimp the one that had sex with GW?

[Zomboid]

Ohhh, memories.

Oh, shit. June 6th marked the 8th year I've been posting here.

... :(

[Seven Force]

I am not a friend of GW, but I am kinda getting tired of the pointless bullying of him. Especially when it comes from all the people on the forum that I like.

The bullying really is more annoying than the annoying shit I don't remember him doing.

[zeldasbiggestfan]

What about me?

[The Leader]

What about you?

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

http://m2j.us/images/wrestlers/raven.jpg

[MrAdventure]

while you were gone i started a successful websigh called the dailybull.ca maybe u have heard of it a chimp

[spazboy]

MrAdventure <3

[MLE]

Oh and lotida came back for a little while