Favorite Simpsons Quote Ever

[sspadowsky]

The Movementarian cult comes to town, brainwashing the entire populace and taking away Rev. Lovejoy's flock.

Lovejoy is standing alone in his church in the middle of the night, pouring gasoline all over the place. He says, "Oh, Lord.... never thought I'd have to do this again."

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

When Homer drives away and says to Bart and Lisa in a somber tone "Goodbye kids, I need to go and do some serious thinking." Then after Homer Bart and Lisa say to each other "I'm sure he meant to say some serious drinking."

[captain516]

From the episode where Santa's Little Helper gets an operation: Homer:Well, he's got all the money in the world, but there's one thing he can't buy. Marge:What's that? Homer:....A dinosaur.

[Pentegarn]

Bart gets caught shoplifting:

Homer: "Stealing! How could you?! Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives the sermons in church?! Captain Whatshisname!"

[Kitsa]

"I hope you won't judge the entire Brian Setzer Orchestra based on my actions."

[Colonel Flagg]

Burns: You know, Smithers, I think I'll donate a million dollars to the local orphanage. When pigs fly!
[both Burns and Smithers start laughing, but then a pig flies by their window]
Smithers: Will you be donating that million dollars now, sir?
Burns: Hmm, no I'd still prefer not.

[darkvare]

from mr. plow
homer:marge if you get upset every time i do something stupid, i'm gonna stop doing stupid things
marge: good
[homer turns around and crashes his face on the plows door]
marge: are you hurt?
Homer: nghh no

[Grislygus]

"Mr. Simpson, these tar fumes are making me dizzy."

"Yeah, they'll do that."

[Pentegarn]

The Mr. Burns' bear/Citizen Kane parody episode:

Lisa: "That's Mr. Burns' Bear alright."
Homer: "Well he's not getting this cheap I'll tell you that! He's gonna have to give me... my own recording studio..."
(cut to Homer in a recording studio with a band)
Homer singing: "Two all beef patties special sauce lettuce cheese pickles onions on a sesame seed..." [starts drooling]
Producer's voice: "Homer, you're drooling on the microphone again"
(cut back to Homer at his house, still drooling on his hand)

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

When homer's heart is getting bad on him while driving and he thinks its his car so he pulls into the gas station. The clerk(Fake Charles Bronson) explains to Homer that he's got a bum ticker but his car is fine. Homer is relieved and then drives off. A younger(nerdy teenager) asks the older clerk what'll happen to Homer.

Older Clerk: "Billy, do you remember what happened to that old car that just didn't work anymore?"

Billy: "We're going to sell him to Mr. Nickopopolous?"

Older Clerk: "You're a dull boy Billy."

[Wintermute]

Tom, Bart's "bigger brother": You see Bart, whales aren't fish, they're mammals like you and me.
Peppy: Is that true Uncle Homer?
Homer: Pssht, no.

I'd also like to second captain516. I'd almost forgot about that one.

Also, fuck Family Guy.

[Dimnos]

I love these characters to death, but enough is enough. They have been on the air for twenty years now and there no possible situation I could put them in that they haven’t already been in many times before. I really think it’s time to say good bye to The Simpsons and company.


Thank god.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Oh wow. I'm almost disapointed by that. Seasons 11 through 18 were awful but I actually started watching the show again and its funny.....again. They started to write intelligent, funny witty scripts this past year. At least they went out with a hell of a season with 20.

[Pentegarn]

I think that was an April fools joke, look when it was news

http://www.behindthehype.com/television-reviews/the-simpsons-canceled/

[Dimnos]

http://www.voir.ca/blogs/steve_proulx/comic%20book%20guy.gif

"Worst joke ever. :rolleyes "

[Esuohlim]

Oh wow. I'm almost disapointed by that. Seasons 11 through 18 were awful but I actually started watching the show again and its funny.....again. They started to write intelligent, funny witty scripts this past year. At least they went out with a hell of a season with 20.

People keep saying this, but every time I catch a brand new episode it's just as awful as it's always been for the last decade. Maybe it did get better, but the charm certainly isn't there anymore.

[Supafly345]

Yeah, in the early 2000s I thought people were too hard on it, and that it was still pretty good, despite jumping the shark nearly every episode. But then I forgot about for some reason, and went most of the past 5 years without seeing more than a commercial for it.

So when hulu came around I subscribed to the show on a whim, because it was there and started watching it again, not expecting it to be very good. But it somehow it was more lame than I imagined. The stories have no structure, the jokes are sometimes funny, but it doesn't matter because the show is a mess. They don't even have an ending most of the time, it just peters out. It feels like an uncreative kid is doing an impersonation of the simpsons.
They are clearly spending more money on the animation nowadays than holding themselves to the high standards of writing they used to. Its like their entire staff is nothing but punch up, and they just string the punch up together and write the show around it.

[k0k0]

I still watch the Simpsons but it just seems like the simpsons is just a show doing a parody of the old simpsons. Trying to copy the magic and although there are some things that work, most of it doesn't for me. That said, I'll probably still watch it until it's cancelled when Matt Groening dies and it goes even more downhill as people try to keep it alive...which will probably be in 30 years or so.

[captain516]

They really should've stopped after the movie.

[Dimnos]

They should have stopped before the movie. Or put the movie out about 5 years before they did.

[Dr. Boogie]

I was in the same boat as supafly, but I wound up seeing the movie instead after taking a long break.

Watching the movie was just surreal. Here was this show I used to love as a kid, and now, it's unrecognizable.

[k0k0]

I did always like the line when Lionel Hutz says something like. "This is the greatest case of false advertising I’ve seen since I sued the movie 'The Never Ending Story.'"

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I know the kamp krusty episode was originally going to be a movie but was shortened into an episode.

[Pentegarn]

I don't go out of my way to watch it, but when I watch it I just take it for what it is and try to get the 2-3 laughs per episode it usually grants.

[Esuohlim]

I don't have time in my life to get two or three laughs per episode out of what used to be the most brilliant primetime cartoon show ever. It panders to a dumber and more easily distracted audience now, and all the characters speak in puns. The jokes aren't subtle and on a few occasions another character will flat out explain the joke. The list goes on.

[Zomboid]

Milhouse nailed it. The "I laughed a few times an episode" defense has always been pretty awful for that reason. Why would you watch a comedy show if it's not only unfunny, but downright terrible when held to the same high standard as the earlier episodes?

[Pentegarn]

It would seem only half of my post is being focused on

I never called it a defense. I prefaced the statement with "I don't go out of my way to watch the it" for a reason. And that reason is because I don't go out of my way to watch it. When I do watch it it is because I happen upon it while channel surfing, which in itself is rare. I have possibly watched 1-2 episodes a year in the last 4 years. I just don't have time. So to be fair I can't say one way or the other how they all compare. The 2-3 laughs an episode is pretty accurate though.

So let us summarize this 'defense' as it were.

A guy who watches at most 2 episodes a year, who doesn't consider it 'appointment television', gets a roughly 2-3 laughs per episode average from the viewings.

That is less a defense and more a comment I would say

[kahljorn]

man what kinda stuff do you do that you're so busy

[Dimnos]

When it comes to watching the Simpsons? I would be busy doing just about anything else. Doing the dishes. Giving the dogs a bath. Changing my oil. Mowing the lawn. You know. Anything

[Zomboid]

I didn't even read anything Pentegarn posted in here before that last one. I was making a generalization and going with what Milhouse said, not making some pointed comments. Simmer down, cowboy.

You must really like your new Simpsons :lol

[Pentegarn]

I like it only slightly less than you seem to

[Esuohlim]

New Simpsons killed my dad

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

and rapped your mom

[kahljorn]

THE NEW SIMPSON'S RAPPING SERENADE OF YOUR MOTHER

[Pentegarn]

I thought only the old Simpsons rapped

Bartman, Deep Deep Trouble, etc.

[captain516]

MR PLOW

[k0k0]

One of the new episodes of the simpsons had a kanye west song or something instead of the intro and it was so lame. So very lame.

[Dimnos]

The Simpsons are gay. Nothing fancy. Nothing elaborate. Just gay. Proof you say? Here it is... :(

w0IaHJaZKNE

[k0k0]

Oh I guess it wasn't kanye west. Was some other rapper...or is it a dance mix? But yeah, that's what I was talking about.

[darkvare]

oh well at least thanks to the greatness of technology i can see the episodes when the simpsons were really great

[Esuohlim]

It makes me wish I could just separate the two eras of the Simpsons and pretend that the new era is a completely different TV show. Something identical to that I could accept on Family Guy, but it's something the Simpsons did instead and it makes me wonder if the cast or some old-timers on the staff (the people that aren't the shitty writers) are also unhappy with what the show has turned into.

Or maybe they don't care because they're making a lot of money, so fuck it :\

[Zomboid]

I remember reading that Harry Shearer (voice of a shitload of characters) was pretty open about how the show went downhill.

It's really a shame how delusional some people can get when they taste that kind of success. Matt Groening and some of the others seem to think the show is as funny as ever.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I know around the 15th or 16th season they started to have in jokes on the show about how it should end. I think Smithers opened a door into the simpsons dining room while they were having dinner shouting "MR. BURNS HAS BEEN SHOT....AGAIN....BY MAGGIE!!!!" Then he kind of just leaves. Then the family say something like "This is really getting old. Someone should put a stop to it."

Also, I really enjoyed Family Guy when it started so seasons 1-3 are really good for me. Anything post cancellation is garbage.

That's why I'm really worried about the new Futurama start up.

[kahljorn]

I've seen newer simpsons and family guys that i thought were pretty funny :( but then again i smoke a lot of pot

[Dimnos]

American dad is where its at. The fat dumb husband is played out.

[kahljorn]

yea i guess almost fit dumb father has some things going for it

[darkvare]

speaking of seth mcfarlane i finally watched the cleveland show and i couldn't find a reason to laugh

[k0k0]

I've found small things funny about the cleveland show...but the first episode or two were horrible. They were just all up in your face about how black they were.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I like the cleveland show opening. Also. As black as I am I love how black women call me beele.

[Esuohlim]

MAAAAAAAARGE YOU'RE BREAKING MY HEART

[Kitsa]

cleveland's voiced by a white guy, isn't he?

I know his (ex) wife was voiced by Alex Borstein.

I don't like Family Guy anymore.

[toolz88]

Linguo dead, Linguo is dead. Shut upa yo face, shut up your face

[Shadowdancer21b]

Purple monkey dishwasher!

Stupider like a fox!

I'm an original creation like Rickey Rouse and Monald Muck.

[captain516]

tool? how appropriate.

[The Doctor]

The episode where Marge becomes a gambling addict at the Burns casino

Homer: Rambles at her incoherently and fast
Marge: Slow down Homer
Homer: Rambles at her incoherently but slower
Marge: Think before you say each word
Homer: You made a promise to your little girl and you broke it then she cried and I cried, and Maggie laughed shes such a little trooper.

[Dimnos]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v327/bo5ton/simpsonsoftheweek/Homr/24.gif

"In today's news. The Simpsons have been canceled."

[Supafly345]

"my son's name is also Bort"

[Esuohlim]

My favorite Simpsons quote is anything up until season 10 :SMUG

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

I think the episode where I stood my ground by not watching them anymore was the episode with the Trash Wall and the Rolling Stones. It was bad before that episode but it was my breaking point.

[Esuohlim]

I read an interesting point of view once that explained that the Frank Grimes episode was the transition point from classic Simpsons to shitty Simpsons, and how that episode featured a sane real-life character who didn't belong in the Simpsons universe and could see through all the bullshit and incompetence of Springfield. From that moment on, we as the audience became Frank Grimes. Everything about Springfield started to become ridiculous and all the nonsense became more exaggerated, and from a Frank Grimes point of view you wonder how the show has kept going as strong as it did back in the good years.

Personally, I like season 9 and can tolerate season 10. I think I stopped at 14, finally, but everything from 11 on I consider a terrible spinoff of the Simpsons.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

That's a really good example. On DVD I have seasons 4-10. I was thinking about getting season 3 but kind meh about it.

[Shadowdancer21b]

I think the episode where I stood my ground by not watching them anymore was the episode with the Trash Wall and the Rolling Stones. It was bad before that episode but it was my breaking point.

That episode was about the Who. Sorry, i'm a jerk.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

WHO CARES

[Supafly345]

Hey, if he wasn't gonna say it then I was.

[DaTr0LL]

"I'm a furniture." - Ralph Wiggum

[Shadowdancer21b]

"The children are right to laugh at you Ralph, these scissors couldn't cut butter"-Ms. Hoover.

[Nick]

I know around the 15th or 16th season they started to have in jokes on the show about how it should end. I think Smithers opened a door into the simpsons dining room while they were having dinner shouting "MR. BURNS HAS BEEN SHOT....AGAIN....BY MAGGIE!!!!" Then he kind of just leaves. Then the family say something like "This is really getting old. Someone should put a stop to it."

Also, I really enjoyed Family Guy when it started so seasons 1-3 are really good for me. Anything post cancellation is garbage.

That's why I'm really worried about the new Futurama start up.
There has only been one joke from the post-cancellation seasons that has truly made me laugh and it was this one.


fUlUw1nuGK0

[Shadowdancer21b]

"Your name isn't L.T. Smash! It's Lieutenant Smash!" "That's right, Lieutenant L.T. Smash."

[Danny 4 Eyes]

"And when the doctor said I didn't have worms anymore, was the happiest day of my life" - Ralph Wiggum.

[captain516]

"Marge, cartoons don't have any deep meaning! They're just stupid drawings that give you a cheap laugh. *stands up to reveal buttcrack*

[Shadowdancer21b]

"We have to stop these expeditions! We lost three more men last time!"

"If you can think of a better way of getting ice, I'd like to hear it."

[Pentegarn]

I think it was the hurricane episode

Old lady grabbing Lisa by the head during food buying frenzy: The last pineapple! And plenty ripe too!

Lisa: But I'm not fruit! I'm a kid!

Old lady: That's what the pumpkin said

Ralph Wiggum: Hi Lisa! We're going to be in a pie!

[Esuohlim]

WHAT THE FUCJ, MR. BLURNS

[captain516]

BUENOS NOCHES, MEIN FUHRER

[executioneer]

DAS IST NICHT EINEN BOOBY

[Shadowdancer21b]

"One million dollars and three Hawaiian islands. Good ones! Not the leper ones."

[YellowSub287]

Smithers: People see you as something of an ogre...maybe this film festival could help us. A film biography might help them get to know the real you.

Mr. Burns: Get me Steven Spielberg!

Smithers: I'm afraid he's unavailable sir.

Mr. Burns: Then get me his non-union Mexican equivalent!