Job interviews where the interviewer asks no questions [Archive]

Krythor

Dec 9th, 2011, 06:59 AM

Has anyone else had this? I've had two job interviews recently where I got asked no questions. What's the point? At the first one I literally said "have you got any questions for me?" to the guy interviewing me. At the second one I had to pathetically talk about how great I am with no prompting like some egomaniac douchebag. Is this a common thing or am I just unlucky?

Colonel Flagg

Dec 9th, 2011, 09:38 AM

Unlucky is my guess. When interviewing I always try to ask questions testing the background of the interviewee.

10,000 Volt Ghost

Dec 9th, 2011, 10:30 AM

I've never had that happen to me. It seems like most of the time the interviewer will just ask behavioral and background questions.

Evil Robot II

Dec 9th, 2011, 11:13 AM

At that point you should realize that hes not going to hire you and you should berate him for wasting your time with this unorthodox nonsense. Tell him that you find it personally insulting that he would not even prepare for the interview and then try to pass it off as some new age methods shit.

Also see my thread "Helpful Tips by Evil Robot".

Colonel Flagg

Dec 9th, 2011, 11:51 AM

^^^ This

may get you a job as the next CEO.

Aaarg

Dec 9th, 2011, 01:24 PM

the last two interviews i had were essentially "do you want to work here?" "ok." "when can you start?"

and now i can't get an interview. :(

probably unlucky, though. i've never had a questionless interview.

Dimnos

Dec 9th, 2011, 08:17 PM

My last interview turned out to be more of an orientation that ended with "can you start tonight?". The one before that... I walked in and sat down, the guy started telling me about the company then asked me "got any questions?". I asked "Yeah, did I get the job?". He says "no, not yet. I will call you.". Never heard from that guy.

kahljorn

Dec 9th, 2011, 08:40 PM

:lol

fuck all of those people

the only job i got offered an interview at recently sent me a fucking e-mail offering me the interview. So i went to their website to schedule an interview and it said they were all filled.

cocksuckers.

Esuohlim

Dec 9th, 2011, 08:55 PM

The last interview I did was just for a grad student assistant job. He ended up talking my ear off for nearly 30 minutes and didn't really ask me much.

It was only between me and this one girl and I'm pretty sure I lost out on the job because the girl was hot >:

kahljorn

Dec 9th, 2011, 09:02 PM

cocksuckers

ThrashO

Dec 10th, 2011, 07:22 AM

When they ask me "hows does this you work well from 1 to 10" i always say "1" and they dont like it.

its because im number 1 at it

10,000 Volt Ghost

Dec 10th, 2011, 09:56 AM

Chojin

Dec 10th, 2011, 11:52 AM

"hows does this you work well from 1 to 10"

i guess you're on topic, since that isn't a question

kahljorn

Dec 10th, 2011, 04:34 PM

yea i thought you were supposed to be some hot chick esulohim

have some pride god damnit

Evil Robot II

Dec 10th, 2011, 05:45 PM

When they ask me "hows does this you work well from 1 to 10" i always say "1" and they dont like it.

its because im number 1 at it

Yeah I don't think that sentence makes any sense. I sure hope you don't speak like you write.

elx

Dec 10th, 2011, 07:09 PM

if you're applying for a desirable position in which two dozen other people have also applied to, don't expect them to know your resume at all -- they'll probably only graze through it a minute or so before the interview and during, so they end up not knowing anything about you from the start.

if you're applying for a poorly advertised availability, or one that nobody wants, they'll probably take the time to read your resume, and if you did it right, there shouldn't be any questions to begin with. so yeah.

Tacobot

Dec 11th, 2011, 04:38 AM

Sorry to hear, i would pretty pissed off if someone wasted my time with some BS like that.
For all the shitty interviews i was doing recently, they would at the least try figure out if yer a psyco.

ChrisGlass

Dec 13th, 2011, 09:32 PM

Sometimes people see interviews as ego trips, so they like to play god and do psychological bullshit to fuck with people.

I've been having to interview a ton of people lately, and I'm slowly getting better at it.

BatmanJohnson

Dec 13th, 2011, 10:56 PM

I've never had an interview without questions. Weird. Mine are always the stereotypical interview questions that are supposed to give the interviewer insight into how you work. Only trouble I've ever had is when they ask me to talk about myself. I always freeze up when asked to describe myself.

Colonel Flagg

Dec 14th, 2011, 07:20 AM

"If you were a tree, what kind would it be?"

"Where do you see yourself in 5 years?"

Two of the stupidest interview questions ever asked.

Aaarg

Dec 15th, 2011, 01:35 PM

you've seriously been asked that tree question? that's awesome.

i'd probably answer "tsuga canadensis because they're hard-working and get along well with co-workers and always show up on time!" but really it's because i'm being eaten to death by bugs :(

cartooncart

Dec 15th, 2011, 04:37 PM

By the way, if they ask you if you have any questions, you should always prepare a question about stupid bullshit. I got a job and during the "do you have questions" period, I asked them about their policies on environmental issues, etc...

ChrisGlass

Dec 16th, 2011, 05:39 PM

The best thing is to task them questions about their job. Gushing and getting them happy is a good trick.

kahljorn

Dec 16th, 2011, 06:25 PM

the best thing to do is ask them if they want a blowjob

Colonel Flagg

Dec 16th, 2011, 08:09 PM

^^^This.

Protip - If you're being interviewed by a woman, this trick may not work. Be observant!

Grislygus

Dec 16th, 2011, 08:45 PM

"If you were a tree, what kind would it be?"

An oak tree, seeing as how one just sprung up in my lap...

...raised eyebrow

Shyandquietguy

Dec 16th, 2011, 11:12 PM

I think the best thing to do is to start stacking things after he says "Alright then."

I've had one who literally talked my ear off and as if he had decided right after his second question to call it quits, he pulled out a preset questionnaire. He didn't write a damn thing down. I wish I did something but I hate making scenes. :(

Get bent Home Depot.

The only thing I can say is those interviews sound like they expect you to ask background questions of the company and expect you to be all psyched about being a team player.

ThrashO

Dec 19th, 2011, 03:42 AM

lol

10,000 Volt Ghost

Dec 19th, 2011, 04:16 PM

YOU GOTTA PROMOTE SYNERGY.

Colonel Flagg

Dec 19th, 2011, 09:04 PM

^^^This reminds me....

Bring a "Buzzword Bingo" card to the interview to pass the time. Try to get the interviewer to say words like "resources" "kanban" or even "SYNERGY". You get two points if they use a compound buzzword like "win-win situation" and three points if the buzzword is adjectivized, like "synergistic". Each time you are successful say something like "BOOYAH!" or "AWRIGHT!" so they are completely confused.

It won't guarantee you anything more than the other side of the door you walked in, but it can be loads of fun.

EDIT - if at any point the interviewer says the word "paradigm" you WIN, and should do a little dance.