Lenor's Dateing advice colume...

[Lenor]

Just ask me anything...

Sex, relationships, dateing, ect..

Anything goes..

[James]

Dear Lenor,

How do you get a girl to suck your cock straight from her ass, until you blow a load all over her face? The girls in porno always do it.

Sincerely,
Kinky in Connecticut

[HickMan]

If you get your penis stuck in a woman's anal canal. What do you do? Where do you go?

[The Unseen]

Why the hell is hickman here? :(

And to Lenor, how do I get ladies to like me? :(

[Sicktodeathmx]

Why the hell is hickman here? :(

And to Lenor, how do I get ladies to like me? :(
:love

[The Unseen]

;)

[Sicktodeathmx]

:P

[The Unseen]

I saw one of your pictures. You're quite a woman. :)

[Sicktodeathmx]

Quite a woman? Is that a bad thing?

[The Unseen]

Not at all. :(

[Sicktodeathmx]

Oh, OK... Good.

[HickMan]

Why the hell is hickman here? :(

And to Lenor, how do I get ladies to like me? :(

WTFOMG

[agroskaterik]

NU-UH

[Sicktodeathmx]

OMG... Peewee.... Eww...

[Lenor]

James-
PORNO is only there to get you aroused. If you want a girl to suck your dick after anal, and then let you blow your wad all over her, your either gonna need to find someone really kinky, wash your dick afterwards (cause thats gross), or get into the porno buisness.


The unseen-
Most females, but not all, tend to go for a guy who seems to have alot of problems, as they think they can change him into what they think is a better person. But soon they relize that he really is just a cheating asshole dirtbag who never got out of middle school. My advice to you, Stay exactly the same. :) who knows maybe some unexpecting female will decide that your the one.

[Cap'n Crunch]

Could you tell me the correct spelling of "dateing"? :lol

















:(

[Lenor]

Could you tell me how you got that stick shoved so far up your ass? I would love to hear all about it!

[Rongi]

Why are all the smart pretty women lesbians :(?

[kellychaos]

Dear Lenor,

How do you get a girl to suck your cock straight from her ass, until you blow a load all over her face? The girls in porno always do it.

Sincerely,
Kinky in Connecticut

It's all editing. Actually, it's ass, cooch then the mouth. Usually the girl has a tattoo on her lower back while wearing midriff shirts which helps you to determine which ones are up to the task.

[James]

Could you tell me how you got that stick shoved so far up your ass? I would love to hear all about it!

Hey! You're supposed to be the one answering the sex questions, not asking them. :lol

[The One and Only...]

My problem. (http://www.i-mockery.net/viewtopic.php?t=9218)

[Supafly345]

Lenor, why is it that you are in no way qualified to give men dating advice yet you still believe so?

[Lenor]

Who said it was only for guys? And since when are you the expert on who can give advice and who can't? Besides I thought It would be funny to see what people actually said.

And in all reality, you can't have anal sex, then just go the other way, its a serious infection risk.

and by the way according to NYS I can give advice and therapy to whom I please..

[Anonymous]

Why does it cry?

[Cap'n Crunch]

Could you tell me how you got that stick shoved so far up your ass? I would love to hear all about it!

IT GOT THERE FROM YOUR MISSPELLED WORDS. :lol

[Mr. Vagiclean]

Why do girls hate getting kicked in the nose? I thought they loved that :(

[Supafly345]

And since when are you the expert on who can give advice and who can't? Since you were a girl.

[Pub Lover]

Dear Lenor,

For years I've laboured to make my life as secluded as
possible, & limit any social contact to almost zero. At the time I
assumed this was what I wanted, however, having lived this life for
eighteen months now, I'm slowly coming to the conclusion that it's
godawful being lonely. Also, I've developed an extreame fear of
going out & being around people, & recent attempts to do so have
resulted in panic attacks & fainting.
My question revolves around me being extreamely weak-willed,
Lenor, should I just end it all now & take my life?

Yours Pub.

[The Unseen]

I missed you, my friend. :)

[Big McLargehuge]

Dear Lenor,

Would you think less of me if I told you I cried whenever I masturbate?

[HickMan]

Dear Lenor

Is it natural for my penis to bleed when I ejaculate?

[Pub Lover]

Hey, this is dating advice, not crazy mental sex shit... Oh wait... :lol ... >:

[Geggy]

dear lenor...

i met this girl. we have so many things in common, its almost as if she's a female version of me. anyway my problem is this, she gave me her email address and we played email tag for a while, since we both were too busy to even do anything together. she works first shift and i work second. however i admit to her that i ve been hacking into her account for fun(well it was at first) and she knew that i ve been hacking into her account and reading her emails. when i had turned obsessive and i didnt have the willpower to stop compulsing and stalking, i ve asked her few times it would be nice if she changed the password, but she wouldnt. when i send her an email, she doesnt reply to them yet she keeps them in a folder with my name on it. this one time she got an (very pointless)email from her boss at her work. i read the email. i told her i knew where she works and told her the date i was going to show up. it was the same thing, she didnt reply yet saved the email. few days later i show up her work. she was wearing all black clothes a la matrix films. she normally doesnt wear black. she didnt seem to mind at all that i showed up. hell she even let me keep on showing up, around lunch time. we seem to enjoy each others company. i'm confused. i've never put myself into this type of situation before. we havent had sex or even kissed. i dont feel guilty at all. she's never asked me to leave her alone. is it love? is it something more?please explain.

yours truly.
geggy.

[Carnivore]

Why do I hate you so very much, Lenor? My resolution for 2004 is to hate people less, but it seems I can't in your case. Why is that?

[Lenor]

Pub Lover- Social anxiety, and a panic disorder is nothing to laugh about, ive been battling with it for years. Anxiety is usually genetic, can come out at anytime and is associated with something that might of happend in your life. IT sounds as if your mind was putting up something that you didnt want to deal with at the time. Therapy is the best help for anxiety, combined with maybe a ssri, or a trancyclic-antidepressant. Or if that doesnt work, an anti-anxiety medication to help you learn how to deal with a panic attack. Ending your life is stupid.

Big- crying while masturbating is actually a common thing, sometimes people laugh, scream, ect.. its not a bad thing. ITs just how your body reacts to that kind of stimulation. Which comes from your serintonin. and dopamine reactors. IF you want more information.. www.jackinworld.com


Geggy- this girl seems to like the attention that shes getting, while your acting like a stalker. She might have an alterative motive that you might wanna watch out for. You seem kinda disturbed, and maybe obessing over this girl is makeing you think her actions are more than what they might really be. She could be really ignorant and not really belive you. OR she might just not give a shit, and look at you as someone to fuck around with, shes playing mind games as much as you are.

Carni- YOU :love me and you know it, you just have to admit it to yourself! :)

[executioneer]

totalluy lol @ doopa :lol

PS i hav eno questions b/c I'm not going to go on any dates :lol

-willie

[Carnivore]

I'd :love to see you being drawn and quartered. I'd :love to see a pack of rabid, starving jackals devour you. I admit it.

[HickMan]

WTF WHY WON'T YOU ANSWER MY QUESTION >:

[Anonymous]

Carnivore used two love emoticons in his post to lenor!!!! WHEN'S THE BABY DUE HAHAHAHA :lol :lol

[Prince Valium]

How am i supposed to read a friendly dog who sprouts wood when i give him a pat on the head? An army man told me to prop his legs up against the bar and break both his knees. But i didn't meet him in a bar and never was in the army.

[Big McLargehuge]

Big- crying while masturbating is actually a common thing, sometimes people laugh, scream, ect.. its not a bad thing. ITs just how your body reacts to that kind of stimulation. Which comes from your serintonin. and dopamine reactors. IF you want more information.. www.jackinworld.com

WTF, that's weird, what kind of stupid fag cries when he Masturbates LOL what a bunch of jerks.

P.S. That link you gave me is to a dirty website >:

[Geggy]

dear lenor,

is it true what they say, that constant spontaneous behavior can drive a person to insanity?

geggy.

[Pee Wee Herman]

Dear Lenor,

I have a T-shirt that says "I fuck on the first date." Should I wear that on the first date?

Sincerely,

Fucking on the first date

[Big Papa Goat]

ebaums is hilarious. :)

[Lenor]

Pee Wee- Sure, as long as the girl/guy doenst wear a shirt that sais 'I have pms and a gun, any questions?' you might want to cordinate your outfits together, than you might have something in common with a psychopath that would actually consider going on any date with you.

Geggy: OCD (obssesive compulsive disorder) which im guessing is what you are refering too. Can yes, drive a person insane. IF your talking about your jerking off habits, yes its normal to jerk off 3-10 times a day, just make sure you use lube befor sticking anything into your ass.

And im figureing you came out from under a rock?


If you seeing a dog sprouting something out of his head, you might want further evaluation..

Chojin- Carnis due in April.. he's hoping they fill him up with lots of love and morphine..

Hickman- IM not a doctor, and nor do I care about your penis...

[MegadethGuy]

Dear Lenor,

I'm a person who hates change. When I come home from work, I want to continue to do what I do every day. I mean, every now and then I like going to see a movie, go drinking etc. but most of the time, I wanna sit at home. Now they say opposites attract but wouldn't it more sense for me to find a girl who is basically a female version of me because if I found another girl, she'd want to do something out of my usual method?

This of course raises another problem. I'm a huge nerd which, of course, prolongs my search. I love video games, Warhammer, wrestling, chessy horror flicks and D&D. Should I just change my entire self to get a girl or keep up my endless search for the perfect girl in my eyes?

Rotting in Richmond

[Matt Harty]

Dear Lenor,

Why do I always have to tell girls they aren't fat? I'm very honest with that kind of thing and it annoys me that even after I tell them they look nice, they continue to rant on their looks/diets/weight.

[Sicktodeathmx]

Matt, I can answer this one!
Because women love attention, they love to hear a guy tell them they are perfect and all that nonsense. Especially the fattys.

[Sicktodeathmx]

Dear Lenor,

I'm a person who hates change. When I come home from work, I want to continue to do what I do every day. I mean, every now and then I like going to see a movie, go drinking etc. but most of the time, I wanna sit at home. Now they say opposites attract but wouldn't it more sense for me to find a girl who is basically a female version of me because if I found another girl, she'd want to do something out of my usual method?

This of course raises another problem. I'm a huge nerd which, of course, prolongs my search. I love video games, Warhammer, wrestling, chessy horror flicks and D&D. Should I just change my entire self to get a girl or keep up my endless search for the perfect girl in my eyes?

Rotting in Richmond

Hee hee... Sounds like my kinda guy! Especially the horror flicks and D&D part. Love roleplaying... Woo....

[MegadethGuy]

The few times I've had sex, I've enjoyed that too

[Carnivore]

What would it be like if Lenor and I had children? :puke Had to get the out of my system. They'd either hate practically everyone but be incapable of expressing it coherently or be extremely articulate but completely spastic at the same time. In either case, I'd leave them outside to die of exposure.

[Pee Wee Herman]

Get an abortion or something.

[Lenor]

Carni- why would you take the time to figure out what our children would be like?

Megadethguy- that sounds exactly like me and my boyfriend, He likes to sit at home and play on his computer, doenst ever like to be in the public, Hates confrontation, and likes nothing to ever change. Me, I love people, social situations, and going out and haveing a good time. But I also love video games and computers.
The secret to the whole opposites attract thing, is not to change yourself, but to find a girl that is willling to sit at home and watch a movie with you, or play a video game or something, as long as your willing to go out once in a while and shake your ass with her ;). Its all about compromise, if you can't find it, then its not worth it. But dont change what you like just because of some girl, there's NO future in that, and pretty soon your gonna get really annoyed and bored.

[george]

why hello lenor.

are you pregnant or something?