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View Full Version : Man So Desperate To Have Way With Park Bench His...Thing Gets Stuck


ZeldaQueen
Aug 16th, 2009, 02:04 AM
rFDDDHs8Fsc&

Yeah.

And if anyone wonders, I found it in the article The 6 Strangest Objects People Were Caught Having Sex With (http://www.cracked.com/article_17098_6-strangest-objects-people-were-caught-having-sex-with.html).

Tadao
Aug 16th, 2009, 02:29 AM
They plump when you cook em.

Dr. Boogie
Aug 16th, 2009, 05:58 AM
"However, once he became aroused he found that he was stuck and could not get his penis out of the small hole."

Way to add insult to injury, newslady.


And did I misread the subtitles, or did they say that the police tried bloodletting on his penis?

Dr. Boogie
Aug 16th, 2009, 06:02 AM
And how does him getting his dick stuck in a small hole on a park bench prove that not all asian men are small?

ZeldaQueen
Aug 16th, 2009, 12:31 PM
Yes, they tried bloodletting.

I guess they figured that if it couldn't come out, it couldn't have been that small...

Wiffles
Aug 16th, 2009, 08:51 PM
You must admit tho, thats one attractive park bench ^_~

Jeanette X
Aug 16th, 2009, 11:43 PM
"However, once he became aroused he found that he was stuck and could not get his penis out of the small hole."

Way to add insult to injury, newslady.


And did I misread the subtitles, or did they say that the police tried bloodletting on his penis?

Well I guess that makes sense. Its hard when its engorged with blood, and if the hole was restricting blood flow and preventing it from going down, then the logical thing to do would be to drain the blood to make it flaccid so it could slip out.

I don't see why they cut the whole steel bench free. Couldn't they have just cut the part that his penis was stuck inside of free and took him to the hospital like that, leaving the rest of the bench behind?

ZeldaQueen
Aug 17th, 2009, 12:19 AM
I don't see why they cut the whole steel bench free. Couldn't they have just cut the part that his penis was stuck inside of free and took him to the hospital like that, leaving the rest of the bench behind?

Maybe the way they did it was faster so the poor guy wasn't stuck in public attached to a bench like that.

Jeanette X
Aug 17th, 2009, 12:44 AM
Maybe the way they did it was faster so the poor guy wasn't stuck in public attached to a bench like that.

I think it would've been easier to move him with just a square sheet of metal rather than having to lift an entire bench.

MattJack
Aug 17th, 2009, 12:57 AM
"After the night of heated passion reports are coming in that the man will not return the bench's calls, and has actually removed the bench from his Facebook account."

Zhukov
Aug 17th, 2009, 01:53 AM
... then the logical thing to do would be to drain the blood to make it flaccid so it could slip out.


Did you really have to say "slip out"? It's just put images in my head that he either lubricated it first or that he managed to ejaculate.

On a related note, a friend of a friend of mine was caught humping his couch. He will never, ever, ever live it down.

Dr. Boogie
Aug 17th, 2009, 02:42 AM
Well I guess that makes sense. Its hard when its engorged with blood, and if the hole was restricting blood flow and preventing it from going down, then the logical thing to do would be to drain the blood to make it flaccid so it could slip out.

In spite of the fact that the cops were draining blood from his penis, in spite of the fact that firemen were operating a screeching saw mere inches from his penis, in spite of the fact that he was howling in pain, he still kept it up.

To me, the real story is that this guy is seriously rough trade.

stevetothepast
Aug 17th, 2009, 10:22 AM
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

MrSmiley381
Aug 18th, 2009, 08:03 PM
Well, the beholder had sex with a bench. The beholder was more than likely blind.

ZeldaQueen
Aug 19th, 2009, 02:39 AM
Well, the beholder had sex with a bench. The beholder was more than likely blind.
Or bored. Maybe he had an hour to kill and thought "I wonder what it'd be like to screw a bench?"

Dimnos
Aug 19th, 2009, 10:59 AM
He should have wondered what it would be like to screw his ear with a drill. >:

ZeldaQueen
Aug 19th, 2009, 03:54 PM
Maybe he didn't have a drill handy.