ITT: Things That Must Be Destroyed [Archive]

Zhukov

Jun 19th, 2011, 11:38 PM

Small talk
Bogans
Poor standards of English comprehension
Most facets of the capitalist state
Lazy stereotypes about the sexes being the basis for your comedy routine/conversation
"Reality" television focused on nothing but a half arsed celebrity - or group of - and their stupidity
Tipping

MattJack

Jun 20th, 2011, 12:04 AM

Cormac McCarthy's insistence on not using punctuation.

Guitar Woman

Jun 20th, 2011, 12:04 AM

Mexico
70% of Homestuck's fanbase
Every restaurant in the universe

MattJack

Jun 20th, 2011, 12:08 AM

Mexican restaurants
Mexican culture
Mexico
70% of Homestuck's fanbase

Don't come down here to Texas ( :( )

Kitsa

Jun 20th, 2011, 12:12 AM

Nickelback.

Kitsa

Jun 20th, 2011, 12:13 AM

Cormac McCarthy's insistence on not using punctuation.

YES. Oh my God, this.

He went into the room and he opened the refrigerator door and he took out a carton of milk and he opened it and he took a long swig and he thought for a moment and he closed the refrigerator door again.

:goth

Fathom Zero

Jun 20th, 2011, 12:16 AM

Tex-Mex sucks, Mattjack. Sorry.

MattJack

Jun 20th, 2011, 12:18 AM

Tex-Mex sucks, Mattjack. Sorry.

Tex-Mex must be destroyed. I'm from Louisiana (btch dont fergit it), but authentic Mexican food DESTROYS Tex-Mex. Thus, Tex-Mex must be destroyed.

Fathom Zero

Jun 20th, 2011, 12:21 AM

Some people aren't aware of the difference. I'm sorry to cast you in with that lot. :(

Go catch some gaters for me, son.

MattJack

Jun 20th, 2011, 12:26 AM

YES. Oh my God, this.

He went into the room and he opened the refrigerator door and he took out a carton of milk and he opened it and he took a long swig and he thought for a moment and he closed the refrigerator door again.

:goth

Yes. Blood Meridian is an amazing read, but his style makes me stab shards of broken glass into my eye.

Chojin

Jun 20th, 2011, 01:07 AM

people who act like cartoons or anyone else they see on TV

i've been hanging out with these people lately, and at least two of them have actually facepalmed IRL after someone on a TV show does something stupid as part of their character. they also talk entirely in one-liners and quips but aren't at all witty. it's like hanging out with a travelling anime convention and i might have to kill one of them soon to set an example for the others.

Dimnos

Jun 20th, 2011, 01:37 AM

People that wont stop complaining about everything. >:

Dimnos

Jun 20th, 2011, 01:39 AM

And real Mexican food is the best food on the planet so just stfu! >:

Guitar Woman

Jun 20th, 2011, 02:01 AM

People who quote me right before I edit my posts to say something completely different >:

I really can't properly articulate my hatred for restaurants in general whether they're some mom-and-pop back-alley shithole or a 5-star joint where Gordon Ramsay personally comes out and gives you a blowjob

Eating in these places is nothing but a fucking chore and I have to really fight the urge to urinate under the table before I leave

Zhukov

Jun 20th, 2011, 02:27 AM

Definitely love Mexican restaurants.

Chojin; I know a guy and girl couple that are like that. Christ.

Self titled 'retro gamers' that were born in 1995 and have never owned anything older than a playstation 2, yet still insist on wearing NES t-shirts and calling themselves nerds.

People that want to be my friend, because they're mostly nutters I run into at bus stations. I always seem to end up going to a pub to listen to their problems. Just kill 'em.

Most music these days, most 'artists' these days. Most people.

Skinny white kids in skinny jeans and mop hair cuts calling people ******.

Also, people that say FAIL every five fucking seconds. "Ugh, I stubbed my toe on the way here" "FAIL" "Fail at what?" "walking!" I wasn't walking you fucking ape, I was kicking a brick.

Kids these days.

Litterers.

Middle age people that don't put their phone on silent, then BEEP BOOP BEEP BEEP on the bus next to me when they write a text. No doubt adding "Luv u" and then signing their name after every waste of 25c.

When I order food, and only find out they have run out of a vital ingredient AFTER I have paid for it and it's served to me. Restaurants that do that should be destroyed.

24hr news stations.

Controversial shock-jock DJs on breakfast radio.

Advertising.

People that chew loudly, or slurp soup in an annoying way.

People that treat the Australian flag like it's some kind of holy relic that should be revered and held aloft by angel cocks. Leave that idiocy to racist Americans, thank you.

To be perfectly honest I could go on for days.

All Hail Duke

Jun 20th, 2011, 02:47 AM

liberal politics
conservative politics
mtv and vh1 channels
romantic comedies
michael bay
zack snyder
the idea that robocop needs to be remade
fat people who sue fast food places
michael moore
most teenagers
traffic
3-d
katy perry
ryan reynolds
gang violence
people who play the race card
commercial interruptions
editing movies for televison
the fcc
talented actors and musicians who die too soon
bad actors and musicians who don't die soon enough

Dimnos

Jun 20th, 2011, 04:00 AM

ryan reynolds

Oh shit. You and 10k are about to throw down. :(

executioneer

Jun 20th, 2011, 04:13 AM

i'm MAD at him but i don't want him destroyed :(

creeposaurus

Jun 20th, 2011, 03:44 PM

Your Baby Can Read.

That.

At one point I was annoyed by how misleading the Virgin Mobile commercials with the stalker ex girlfriend was. You get horrible reception when you try and text your boyfriend from his closet.

Sacks

Jun 20th, 2011, 06:19 PM

Turbonegro.

This is all I could think of when I looked at the thread title.

Rez

Jun 20th, 2011, 07:37 PM

Definitely love Mexican restaurants.

born in 1995
People that want to be my friend
Most people.
skinny jeans and mop hair cuts
people that say FAIL
Kids
Litterers.
Middle age people.
food
24hr news stations.
Controversial DJs
Advertising.
People that slurp soup
People that treat a flag like it's some kind of holy relic.To be perfectly honest I could go on for days.
edited for my own preferences

ThrashO

Jun 20th, 2011, 07:49 PM

snow
UBEOyuTOxx8

creeposaurus

Jun 20th, 2011, 08:03 PM

My boyfriend just learned the word cesspool and now he's constantly using it out of context. Kill.

Sacks

Jun 20th, 2011, 08:33 PM

How do you use that word out of context?

creeposaurus

Jun 20th, 2011, 09:52 PM

I didn't go see George Lopez at the Rosemont Theatre cos the tickets were at a cesspool price

MattJack

Jun 20th, 2011, 09:56 PM

Hipsters. Wool caps in the middle of a Texas heat wave? Really?

Dimnos

Jun 20th, 2011, 10:06 PM

I think that is called natural selection.

Evil Robot II

Jun 21st, 2011, 11:40 PM

Turbonegro.

This is all I could think of when I looked at the thread title.
I agree, I saw them in boston opening for GWAR and they were a bunch of homos who were bopping along to prerecorded music ( the CD skipped then stopped and they tried to play it off but THEY SUCK) One of the homos was dressed up as a nazi and thrashed around a plastic trumpet. They did more talking than anything, at first I thought it was a comedy act but then my freinds told they were one of the bands. ( I still don't believe her)

Sacks

Jun 22nd, 2011, 01:29 AM

I agree, I saw them in boston opening for GWAR and they were a bunch of homos who were bopping along to prerecorded music ( the CD skipped then stopped and they tried to play it off but THEY SUCK) One of the homos was dressed up as a nazi and thrashed around a plastic trumpet. They did more talking than anything, at first I thought it was a comedy act but then my freinds told they were one of the bands. ( I still don't believe her)

OBFRekoeQE8

Fathom Zero

Jun 22nd, 2011, 01:33 AM

some of my friends are deeead, some of my friends are de-eeeead

:ryandone

Zhukov

Jun 22nd, 2011, 05:27 AM

snow
UBEOyuTOxx8

I've got a pretty open mind when it comes to destroying things, but fuck you for suggesting that this isn't a classic song that children nowadays would do well to stay inside memorising the lyrics to.

Kitsa

Jun 22nd, 2011, 10:00 AM

Otto

Jun 22nd, 2011, 12:03 PM

What can you expect from dudes who pal around with Bam Fucking Margera. Guy's a dick.

Esuohlim

Jun 22nd, 2011, 01:49 PM

The acronym "ITT"

LordSappington

Jun 23rd, 2011, 02:19 AM

People who take shopping far too seriously.
Video game elitists.
People who rant about how bad alcohol is for you and how they'll never touch it ever, then go and smoke their weight in pot over the week.

Pram Maven

Jun 23rd, 2011, 08:16 AM

Slurpee machines that spit out mostly ice.

The Leader

Jun 23rd, 2011, 10:51 AM

Is there any other kind?

Pram Maven

Jun 23rd, 2011, 10:58 AM

Yeah, the ones that spit out body parts from a Slurpee maintenance worker.

Ex Leper

Jun 23rd, 2011, 02:44 PM

I've got a pretty open mind when it comes to destroying things, but fuck you for suggesting that this isn't a classic song that children nowadays would do well to stay inside memorizing the lyrics to.

I want that shirt he's wearing

captain516

Jun 24th, 2011, 02:35 AM

"X movie" movies, and the producers that made them possible.
I'm cool with pretty much everything else.

Zhukov

Jun 24th, 2011, 03:07 AM

When they show commercials on TV for Two and a Half Men, and the ad says it is on at an 'adults only special time of' ... slightly later than whenever it was on the previous week.

8:00pm isn't an adults only television watching time period by any stretch of the imagination. Funniest Home Videos is on the other channel for Christ's sake. Not that I've ever watched this drivel for longer than a single minute.

Uh, Two and a Half Men should be destroyed.

captain516

Jun 24th, 2011, 03:10 AM

it's already canceled.

Zhukov

Jun 24th, 2011, 03:16 AM

No, no; destroyed. I want The guy, the other guy and the fat kid to be destroyed.

Plus it's still being shown on TV here every other day.

Esuohlim

Jun 24th, 2011, 03:16 AM

it's already canceled.

Yeah but it took 8 years and the main actor to lose his mind to finally bring it down, which is a crime in of itself

Kitsa

Jun 24th, 2011, 06:29 AM

I thought I just heard on the radio that they're planning to keep it going with Charlie Sheen dying in a fiery car crash and something blahblah Ashton Kutcher is the wacky new owner of the house?

I heard that like yesterday.

I hate that show.

Zhukov

Jun 24th, 2011, 09:56 AM

What if that did happen? Jesus.

Kitsa

Jun 24th, 2011, 10:32 AM

Fiery. Firey? I don't know.

Sacks

Jun 24th, 2011, 11:05 AM

Fiery. Firey? I don't know.

http://celebrity-pics.movieeye.com/celebrity_pictures/Guy_Fieri_129132.jpg

elx

Jun 24th, 2011, 11:34 AM

Mexican restaurants

dude, mexican restaurants are the best. they feed you as soon as you walk in.

pen-stealers should be destroyed. I had a dude say, "wow this pen is great" and I was like, "yeah it's my favorite," so he smiles -- and then walks away with it. I'm so glad you liked my $8 pen so much that you decided it was worth blatantly stealing, jerk. :(

Zhukov

Jun 24th, 2011, 12:09 PM

I agree with that one so much. If you borrow a piece of paper, well that means you can keep it, but if I lend you my pen at the same time then I want it back.

Try to steal all that guy's pens for as long as he lives, elx.

executioneer

Jun 24th, 2011, 12:11 PM

"wow this penis great"

this is how i read this part.

Try to steal all that guy's penis for as long as he lives, elx.

AND THIS

ThrashO

Jun 24th, 2011, 12:12 PM

I've got a pretty open mind when it comes to destroying things, but fuck you for suggesting that this isn't a classic song that children nowadays would do well to stay inside memorising the lyrics to.

Icb_tRTnA4g

And also, PEOPLE WHO DON'T TIP. YEAH FUCK YOU. GIMME RED PICKLES I DONT KAIR. servers make about $2 hourly, and most of that is taken out in taxes so our check is usually $0/Void. SO THAT TIP IS HOW I PAY MY BILLS AND BUY MY DRUGS.

My favorite is guys who shake your hand and say "damn boy yous da best waiter I ever did have, imma tell all my friends aboutchou!" and I usually say "Please don't sir and go back to school" then they leave nothing after i gave them great advice. I APPRECIATE IT AND I TRIED BY TMOBILE DOESNT TAKE HANDSHAKES.

At least thats how it is here all over the east coast. When I was serving in seattle I made $9 hourly plus all my tips from nice customers. It was pretty ballin' working full time along with school.

And elx, you gotta steal pens by the dozens from walmart. G2's are the best and fit great by the handful in my girlfriends purse. Don't feel bad, most people who eat at chilis work at walmart so when they steal your pen it's just going to end up back there anyways. consider it borrowing.

executioneer

Jun 24th, 2011, 12:14 PM

thrasho you gotta realize that in a lot of places outside of the US people actually get paid full wages to serve food and therefore tipping is really not practiced

ThrashO

Jun 24th, 2011, 12:20 PM

thrasho you gotta realize that in a lot of places outside of the US people actually get paid full wages to serve food and therefore tipping is really not practiced

I had no idea :(

It's so hard being white, why do we always have to go through hardships like this?

Ex Leper

Jun 25th, 2011, 12:07 AM

Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jason_Friedberg_and_Aaron_Seltzer) Movies.

Zhukov

Jun 25th, 2011, 01:32 AM

thrasho you gotta realize that in a lot of places outside of the US people actually get paid full wages to serve food and therefore tipping is really not practiced
Yeah, I suppose I should have added that.

Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer Movies.
I watched Scary Movie when it came out, but that's it. Everybody who enjoys these piles of tripe should also be destroyed.

EDIT: And also anyone involve in their creation. Cast, crew, writers, those that put money into it etc

LordSappington

Jun 25th, 2011, 04:03 AM

Steven Seagal.
He looks retarded, his acting is awful, his fighting is awful, and he reminds me of that one neighbor you have who walks by when you're grilling and asks "When's dinner?"
I dunno, buddy; how about you go home ask figure it out yourself? Asshole.

Zhukov

Jun 25th, 2011, 04:06 AM

If you were washing your car, Steven Segal would look over the fence and say "You can do mine next!"

Sacks

Jun 25th, 2011, 04:28 AM

I would oblige.

Ex Leper

Jun 25th, 2011, 08:11 AM

The worst thing about there movies is not only the lack of understanding of what satire is, but the fact that actually funny people like Fred Willard and Jennifer Coolage participate.

Evil Robot II

Jun 25th, 2011, 08:31 PM

people who brag about having thier pannus removed

Nick

Jun 26th, 2011, 01:47 PM

Peter Laird for selling TMNT to Nickelodeon.

My childhood, apparently. :(

elx

Jun 26th, 2011, 10:23 PM

And also, PEOPLE WHO DON'T TIP. YEAH FUCK YOU. GIMME RED PICKLES I DONT KAIR. servers make about $2 hourly, and most of that is taken out in taxes so our check is usually $0/Void. SO THAT TIP IS HOW I PAY MY BILLS AND BUY MY DRUGS.

And elx, you gotta steal pens by the dozens from walmart. G2's are the best and fit great by the handful in my girlfriends purse. Don't feel bad, most people who eat at chilis work at walmart so when they steal your pen it's just going to end up back there anyways. consider it borrowing.
Europeans are the absolute worst, man. We're located in a private urban complex that has 1.3-2.5 million dollar high-rise condos, and all we get is business men and investors like every single night. They sit at our bar for hours, always spend like $2k on imported beers/white wine and NEVER tip our bar attendant. but they know damn well better than that. Scandinavians/Germans are the worst drunk people. :(

.5 G2s have been my favorite for years, but I love the colors that the .7 gel ones come in too so I hate buying them and would never steal :( ANYWAY - you're my problem dude. My servers steal pens from me more than customers ever do. I refill the station jars, and they disappear within like an hour and then they come over and start jacking mine when i'm below deck. :( I don't know how you knew that I worked in the restaurant biz, but yeah. PEN STEALERS. BURN.

ThrashO

Jun 27th, 2011, 02:55 PM

Not steal from servers! Steal from the store! I dont have time to wait in lines, I grab a handful of shit then stuff it in my pocket and get the hell out.

Yes, One time I had these 2 smoking euro skanks, their bill was like $250, without the tip, and all they did was leave $200 total. My manager told me I had to pay for it but I told him to go fuck himself. Also, I double drop alot of checks by movings bevs, soups, salads and chips around along with other things that don't come from the kitchen. It sure is effective and you don't feel like you lost that much if you have to cover a fuck-up with your own money :)

Also I got fired from there forever ago. Still dunno why.

Zomboid

Jun 28th, 2011, 12:07 AM

Fuck you and your tips. Go do construction or something else if carrying food to people is just impossible without them paying more than the price of their food and drinks. Or, y'know, put in extra effort.

I agree with most of the things listed. I can't stand hipsters, and BROS are nearly as bad, but at least they're not as smug and delusional. I also instantly dislike most teenagers. Oh, and those awful parody movies and the people that watch them are just so infuriating that I try not to think about them. Same goes for Kevin James/Adam Sandler/Rob Schneider movies and fans.

Chojin

Jun 28th, 2011, 03:51 AM

Fuck you and your tips. Go do construction or something else if carrying food to people is just impossible without them paying more than the price of their food and drinks.

Bro, during the 2 weeks I worked as a waiter, I witnessed my trainer collect a check for negative 15 cents. Your tips are taxed in addition to your server income (which is about $2/hr), and is literally the only money you collect in that job. In the US anyway, maybe your confusion is due to some antisocial Canadian customs I'm unfamiliar with.

Zomboid

Jun 28th, 2011, 04:14 AM

Your tips were taxed? I'm not sure if they do that here. What is minimum wage there? I get the impression that American servers have it rougher than Canadian ones, but that's maybe just because I've never worked at that kind of job.

Chojin

Jun 28th, 2011, 04:17 AM

minimum wage varies by state but is usually about $7.50. thing is, regular minimum wage doesn't apply to waiters, so for them it's about $2 before taxes.

tips are taxed but no one reports them, so the restaurant instead assumes your tips based on a lowballed average. it's still usually more than enough to erase your hourly pay from income tax, though.

Zhukov

Jun 30th, 2011, 12:18 PM

Maybe next time unions and workers rights come around you wont be so quick to dismiss them, people of the USA.

Zomboid

Jun 30th, 2011, 12:37 PM

I'm pretty sure our laws here prohibit that kind of unfair treatment. I know that for unions, especially, Canada is more open to them. Poor working class Americans :(

Zhukov

Jun 30th, 2011, 12:59 PM

Don't pity them, or else they'll never learn.

Maybe all you waiting staff should come to Australia, the minimum wage is $AU15.51 per hour here. That's big dollars.

God, that's all we need. Fat, lazy Americans taking all our jobs.

ItalianStereotype

Jun 30th, 2011, 02:17 PM

It's shitty the way this country treats servers, yes, but I prefer it here over anywhere else. That's pretty awesome that Australian servers make that kind of money, but you have to live in Australia. I can make a bill in five hours and be perfectly satisfied that I don't live in Australia.