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Topic Review (Newest First)
Dec 5th, 2009 02:37 PM
Cheesoboy I went and saw this movie with some friends at a Drive-in theater (I had a DD) and we had a cooler of beverages to get us through this monstrosity (I wanted to see the new Terminator movie which was the second part of the double feature). I pledged to take a drink every time Shia or any other crappy actor/actress said something bumbling, inane, sophomoric, or unfunny and suffice it to say, I am quite sure I was quite tipsy 25 minutes into the movie. The only upside is I was able to time subsequent bathroom breaks for everytime people started talking the rest of the movie. Even devoid of a good portion of the dialogue the movie was still hard to watch and once Sam's parents were caught in Egypt, ducking and diving in slo-mo, and his dad had started shouting, "I'M GOING WITH YOU!" with cheesy instumentals in the background I nearly entered a coma.

I sadly remember very little about T4 thanks to this movie, although I suspect I was not overly impressed/borderline let down.

Days later my friends and I placed a bet on whether the next movie will have a Spanish talking, salsa dancing bot who transforms from a Taco Stand and hotwires cars or a slanty-eyed bot that can't pronounce its "Rs" that transforms into a rice cooker. BECAUSE IT'S OKAY IF THEY ARE ROBOTS (sarcasm). I'm quite sure "Revenge of the Fallen" is the closest I will come to seeing contemporary blackface in cinema.

This movie made me caress and cradle my VHS copy of the real Transformers movie for dear life:-( It's quite sad that even with Proto's lengthy and accurate analysis of the movie we could all easily find pages of additional faults...
Dec 5th, 2009 02:08 AM
Nick Longest review ever!
Dec 5th, 2009 01:57 AM
HowardC Actually it's a disaster movie in every sense of the word. The casting, character design, voice acting (with a few obvious exceptions of course) and plot... all disasterous. :D

I agree though. They are a fun movie to watch... ONCE... and then block it out and blame it on the booze.
Dec 4th, 2009 10:05 PM
Kilgore Cod I liked both movies but at the same time, I simply can't defend them. They are junk cinema, and I sure love me some Doritos.

It helps that I view them as disaster movies, except with lots of bad attempts at humor.
Dec 4th, 2009 03:38 PM
Mister Tea Ant10708: Do not assume that I subscribe to politically correct thinking. I don't by that "wigger" shit for a second, but I couldn't care less if the dumbasses behind this movie wanted to make racial jokes or not. No, my problem with the shuckin' and jivin' robots in Transformers 2 is that they, like everything else in both movies, are simply not funny. No form of humor should ever be off limits, but it has to be done well.

Even with the Rifftrax for the first Transformers, I had trouble sitting through the movie's execrable "humor," and sat wondering what sort of imbecile could possibly find it funny. The only thing I could come up with is the loud, doughy, red-faced dork who nearly dies laughing as he watches Two and a Half Men. And I really hope that guy is happy, because non-idiots found the movie was so unfunny it hurt.
Dec 3rd, 2009 05:06 PM
hobbsend First, spot review, this piece of crap wasn't worth the time and/or money put into it. Secondly, golf clap for our heroic Proto for proper use of the term "MacGuffins". That just made happy in ways it shouldn't
Dec 3rd, 2009 02:55 PM
Y-Hat How can you review this movie and leave out the giant robot balls and the blantant wankery towards the military? This movie was horrible on so many levels. It's hard to make a bad Transformers movie, but Michael Bay loves a challenge.
Dec 3rd, 2009 01:48 PM
ZombieRaper The Rifftrax of this movie is pretty funny
Dec 3rd, 2009 04:18 AM
DarkfireTaimatsu I almost wanted to see this film, but I was too lazy to make cutouts of Tom Servo and Crow to bring to the theater.

@Rufus the Perturbed
I'd argue that Spike is too cool a name for the alleged hero.
Dec 2nd, 2009 11:48 PM
Protoclown Ant10708, I'm glad we could find something you're so passionate about.
Dec 2nd, 2009 10:58 PM
robo_rob
Quote:
Originally Posted by saturnknight View Post
wow... I thought the twin bots were Redneck stereotypes. but why hasen't anyone ripped into.... i think it was "wheeljack" you know the toy monster truck that humped megan fox's leg?
Wheelie, because it'd be like making fun of a retarded kid for being retarded.
Dec 2nd, 2009 10:58 PM
robo_rob
Quote:
Originally Posted by DavidFullam View Post
That's good. I did hear that a few did go after Ebert pretty bad for his take on the film.
yeah, but no death threats this time... that I know of
Dec 2nd, 2009 10:48 PM
saturnknight wow... I thought the twin bots were Redneck stereotypes. but why hasen't anyone ripped into.... i think it was "wheeljack" you know the toy monster truck that humped megan fox's leg?
Dec 2nd, 2009 09:01 PM
DavidFullam
Quote:
Originally Posted by robo_rob View Post
Don't worry, enough of us were upset at the movie to cut down on that kinda backlash. That and... well... that kinda behavior has simmered down a bit in the past few years.
That's good. I did hear that a few did go after Ebert pretty bad for his take on the film.
Dec 2nd, 2009 08:16 PM
robo_rob
Quote:
Originally Posted by Protoclown View Post
I am reassured that no one has stepped in to defend this movie.

As for Jetfire's accent, I totally didn't get that he's Australian. And hell, I've heard a lot of Australian accents too. Huh.
If anything, I'll defend your review on our show. I even liked the movie, but man... it was pretty bad.
Dec 2nd, 2009 08:14 PM
robo_rob
Quote:
Originally Posted by DavidFullam View Post
Perfect review, but be prepared for the onslaught of nasty emails you get from the legions of Transformer fans who take great umbrage when someone disses these highly important works of cinematic art.
Don't worry, enough of us were upset at the movie to cut down on that kinda backlash. That and... well... that kinda behavior has simmered down a bit in the past few years.
Dec 2nd, 2009 04:16 PM
Ant10708 Fuck this inability to edit. sorry for the multiple posts.

From the black voice actor "It's an alien who uploaded information from the Internet and put together the conglomeration and formed this cadence, way of speaking and body language that was accumulated over X amount of years of information and that's what came out," he said. said. "If he had uploaded country music, he would have come out like that. It could easily be a Transformer that uploaded Kevin Federline data. They were just, like, posers to me." God Bless america where whiny white people get more offended over supposed black stereotypes then black people themselves. Its your own racist beliefs that make you see the twin robots as black people and not just idiots robotic versions of someone like kevin federline.
Dec 2nd, 2009 04:12 PM
Ant10708 And the other voice actor for the racist robot was the voice of spongebob squarepants lol. Considering a black man and the voice of spongebob came up with the direction of the voice I have to assume there wasn't much racism being played out but who knows maybe Tom Kenny hates black people and the other black voice actor is just a hater. I used the word hater in the same sentence as 'black voice actor' omg racist!
Dec 2nd, 2009 04:06 PM
Ant10708 Racist robots. cry me a river. And for the record none of the robots could "read the ancient text or whatever" not just the ones you see as black stereotypes.

It was a bad movie but this omg the robots are racist is so retarded. I see more white teenagers acting like the twin robots then black people. And when did black people have stereotypical buck teeth? I thought that was asians. And again for the record one of the voice actors for the racict robots is a black man.

I feel it is more racist to see all these things on a robot(stupidity,monkey features,illiterate) and assume it represents a black person. Maybe we should all move past these outdated racial stereotypes and then you will be able to see two stupid ass robots and not black people.

Its like when my friend told me Resident Evil 5 was racist because you shot black zombies. Hes the fucking racist for finding it less offensive to kill white and spanish zombies then black ones.
Dec 2nd, 2009 02:44 PM
Mister Tea Let 'em try it; we'll rip 'em a new ass.
Dec 2nd, 2009 12:37 PM
DavidFullam Perfect review, but be prepared for the onslaught of nasty emails you get from the legions of Transformer fans who take great umbrage when someone disses these highly important works of cinematic art.
Dec 2nd, 2009 12:38 AM
Captain Seamus Now, I didn't mind the first one. It was cheesy, stupid, and cliched, but it still didn't cause my physical pain.

This is one of a handful of movies that made me want to commit harakiri.
Dec 1st, 2009 07:44 PM
Protoclown I am reassured that no one has stepped in to defend this movie.

As for Jetfire's accent, I totally didn't get that he's Australian. And hell, I've heard a lot of Australian accents too. Huh.
Dec 1st, 2009 05:36 PM
neoboman One of the worst movies ever made, bar none.
Dec 1st, 2009 03:46 PM
Joe Musashi What I can't believe is that my parents REALLY LIKED this movie. Both this one, and the first. They were like this with Van Helsing too, and that movie was incredibly boring. I can't see what they find so delightful about them.
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