Go Back   I-Mockery Forum > I-Mockery Discussion Forums > Loveline > Dating halp
FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Thread: Dating halp Reply to Thread
Title:
Message
Image Verification
Please enter the six letters or digits that appear in the image opposite.


Additional Options
Miscellaneous Options

Topic Review (Newest First)
Sep 28th, 2008 12:46 AM
LordSappington
Quote:
Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost View Post
You should try guys then. Being sterile makes felching that much easier .
Admittedly, he DOES have a valid point.
Sep 27th, 2008 10:18 PM
Dixie
?
Sep 27th, 2008 10:06 PM
10,000 Volt Ghost
Quote:
Originally Posted by LordSappington View Post
None of the girls I could ever like. I even have shirt that says 'I hate babies'.

You should try guys then. Being sterile makes felching that much easier .
Sep 25th, 2008 05:58 PM
LordSappington None of the girls I could ever like. I even have shirt that says 'I hate babies'.
Sep 25th, 2008 09:36 AM
wobzire
Quote:
Originally Posted by LordSappington View Post
Actually I'm sterile.
Awkward....
You will have to lie about this, girls only put up with sex because it MIGHT result in a baby for them.
Sep 25th, 2008 01:47 AM
pac-man
Quote:
Originally Posted by LordSappington View Post
Actually I'm sterile.
Awkward....
You should be having sex with reckless abandon.
Sep 25th, 2008 12:06 AM
Tadao OH THANK GOD!
Sep 25th, 2008 12:05 AM
LordSappington Actually I'm sterile.
Awkward....
Sep 24th, 2008 07:41 PM
MarioRPG
Quote:
Originally Posted by Grislygus View Post
...an AMC Gremlin). Don't forget to avoid condoms, you're dying here, get that genetically deficient seed out there, man!
This is why I love you.
Sep 24th, 2008 06:47 PM
DevilWearsPrada dont need to actuallh impress her, just buy cleaning maid cheap online now ForEx buy sell made easy
Sep 24th, 2008 06:27 PM
Tadao Why do spam bots have to talk?
Sep 24th, 2008 06:24 PM
badzy dress properly crack an intellectual joke hehe.
but you dont actuallh need to impress her,what you must do is to show how serious you are even i simplest ways!
Sep 24th, 2008 03:52 PM
Chojin that sounds like a terrific plan for anyone who's short on time, really.
Sep 24th, 2008 02:17 PM
Grislygus
Quote:
Originally Posted by DevilWearsPrada View Post
Well jeez gus no need to look at my message archives

-DevilWearsPrada
Thanks for the last minute reaffirm of your name there, wouldn't have gotten it without ya!

So, you've gone from 'probably going to' get cancer to 'having nut cancer in remission' (both loose paraphrases, for the humorless and overly literal). Well, it's simple, kid, that kind of progression in a few days is pretty intense. You need to latch those festering, cancerous hooks into a girl before the inward rot affects those dashing good looks of yours.

Only one way to handle that. Get a leather jacket, ray bans sunglasses, start smoking (what to you have to lose, right? [and smake a damn cigar, nancy faggot]), and roar through your town with Shadow of Knight's I am the Hunter blasting at full volume in a 1968 Charger (or, that being an impossibility, a car more suited to your personality, such as an AMC Gremlin). Don't forget to avoid condoms, you're dying here, get that genetically deficient seed out there, man!
Sep 23rd, 2008 11:21 PM
Dixie Tell a story where you got in a fight defending a girl's "honor" and you have a bad knee from it. Works alot better.
Sep 23rd, 2008 09:56 PM
LordSappington Ha, I doubt anyone CAN steal my bike. It's made out of old Soviet war tanks, and weighs about 500 pounds, maybe.
Either way it's a shitty bike.
Also, I DO have nut cancer, it is currently in remission, and yes, it did suck terribly.
Sep 23rd, 2008 09:26 PM
Tadao Ah, the old sympathy play. I am not against this move, I just wouldn't try doing it with cancer. Next time try a broken arm or get you bike stolen.
Sep 23rd, 2008 08:47 PM
LordSappington
Quote:
Originally Posted by Grislygus View Post
LordSappington: "Damnit! DAMMIT!"
DevilWearsPrada: "What is it?"

LordSappington: "Marla dumped me, Nearl!"
DevilWearsPrada: "I thought you were just going to see a movie."

LordSappington: "She couldn't handle it! When I told her about how I have a pretty good chance of getting cancer when I'm older, she said she didn't want to have to deal with that. I'm such a failure."
DevilWearsPrada: "You told her that?"

LordSappington: "Dammit!"
DevilWearsPrada: "You never told that to me, Toby."

LordSappington: "Women are very good at making me feel like a worthless sack of crap."
DevilWearsPrada: "Hey, hey, don't talk like that." (inches closer) "who needs women anyway, huh? I'm sure you'll find someone who likes you for who you are."



LordSappington: "Someone who likes nut cancer."
*facepalm* I didn't just say 'Oh hey, I have cancer', she brought up how bad it must suck having cancer when we saw some poor kid who'd had chemo, and I said 'Yeah, yeah it does' and it went downhill from her.
What a bitch.
Sep 23rd, 2008 06:51 PM
DevilWearsPrada Well jeez gus no need to look at my message archives

-DevilWearsPrada
Sep 23rd, 2008 03:03 PM
Dixie
Quote:
Originally Posted by Grislygus View Post
LordSappington: "Damnit! DAMMIT!"
DevilWearsPrada: "What is it?"

LordSappington: "Marla dumped me, Nearl!"
DevilWearsPrada: "I thought you were just going to see a movie."

LordSappington: "She couldn't handle it! When I told her about how I have a pretty good chance of getting cancer when I'm older, she said she didn't want to have to deal with that. I'm such a failure."
DevilWearsPrada: "You told her that?"

LordSappington: "Dammit!"
DevilWearsPrada: "You never told that to me, Toby."

LordSappington: "Women are very good at making me feel like a worthless sack of crap."
DevilWearsPrada: "Hey, hey, don't talk like that." (inches closer) "who needs women anyway, huh? I'm sure you'll find someone who likes you for who you are."



LordSappington: "Someone who likes nut cancer."
For some reason I'm picturing those two as Nermal and Odie.
Sep 23rd, 2008 01:37 PM
wobzire Hahaha! Best fan-fic I have ever read.
Sep 23rd, 2008 01:30 PM
Grislygus LordSappington: "Damnit! DAMMIT!"
DevilWearsPrada: "What is it?"

LordSappington: "Marla dumped me, Nearl!"
DevilWearsPrada: "I thought you were just going to see a movie."

LordSappington: "She couldn't handle it! When I told her about how I have a pretty good chance of getting cancer when I'm older, she said she didn't want to have to deal with that. I'm such a failure."
DevilWearsPrada: "You told her that?"

LordSappington: "Dammit!"
DevilWearsPrada: "You never told that to me, Toby."

LordSappington: "Women are very good at making me feel like a worthless sack of crap."
DevilWearsPrada: "Hey, hey, don't talk like that." (inches closer) "who needs women anyway, huh? I'm sure you'll find someone who likes you for who you are."



LordSappington: "Someone who likes nut cancer."
Sep 23rd, 2008 12:19 AM
Tadao NVM
Sep 23rd, 2008 12:11 AM
LordSappington
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tadao View Post
Yes, I know touching a girl makes you feel ill, but don't be gay. K?
MAYBE
Also, you get nut cancer, see how much you laugh THEN. My hospital is sponsored by some guy named Gaylord! THAT'S funny.
Sep 22nd, 2008 11:01 PM
Sam HA.

All I read was the part about being dumped for cancer and I had a good laugh.
This thread has more than 25 replies. Click here to review the whole thread.

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

   


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:43 AM.


© 2008 I-Mockery.com
Powered by: vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.