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May 23rd, 2007 09:49 PM
MisSFiT Well, I thought it was supposed to be someone holding a brain, and that is probably what it is supposed to look like, but in reality if you look closer you can see that it's his bald head (you can see his ears). Actually, now that I looked closer, it looks like he is scrunching his skin together with his hands to look like a brain!
May 23rd, 2007 04:11 PM
kahljorn I dont get it I thought it was supposed to look like his brain or something.
May 23rd, 2007 01:07 AM
MisSFiT After I saw your pic I finally get your avatar.
May 22nd, 2007 03:34 PM
Perndog I've been too busy lately to dig up my sig and upload it. Maybe tonight.
May 22nd, 2007 03:27 PM
kahljorn IO thought your signature said, "White Ninja sig perndogging"
May 22nd, 2007 02:47 PM
Perndog Update on the long ex-girlfriend story above:

Guy she's dating calls me on the phone: "Hey, I know this is kind of personal, but when's the last time you guys had sex?"
Me: "I dunno, maybe six months ago. Why?"
Guy: "Oh, she's late and I was just wondering."



And it turns out that she still hasn't started to get over me (after a year) and she's both been keeping him at arm's length and subtly trying to cock-block me with every other girl because she desperately wants me back. So now that we've got all this in the open and she said she wouldn't do that anymore I told her about all of the girls I'd like to date to get back at her for being a jealous jerk.

Oh, and summer fling girl is doing well. She sends her regards.
May 16th, 2007 05:09 PM
Supafly345 Got to put a little more effort into the ugly too.
May 7th, 2007 07:56 PM
Perndog I didn't get the eyes right, and the beard was a little too wide on the sides. I trimmed it afterward.
May 7th, 2007 05:42 PM
MetalMilitia Indeed looking like Kane is one of the cooler things one can do with their life.
May 7th, 2007 02:28 PM
Perndog Oh, and I forgot one thing. This might be short and sweet enough for a comic.

I started shaving my head this winter because I don't like my receding hairline, and I grew a badass goatee at the same time. It made me look like five years older. I looked like Kane from Command and Conquer. And then last week I shaved my goatee off to deemphasize my age because I'm hitting on that 19 year old girl.
May 7th, 2007 01:53 PM
AChimp Hmm... this is tough for a comic. I was thoroughly entertained, though.
May 7th, 2007 01:13 AM
Terra yeah i so relate to you dood. see a while back i had this big hoowie thing with james on the phone but before that i had this like really big fling with madmax and like everybody hated me and they still do and then cosmoelectrolux came along and swept me off my my feet and pissed EVERYBODY off but before that i became really cool with lotida and then lenore and we used to laugh at shit and then milhouse fell in love with the both of us and had to put us on the ignore list and shit and guitarwoman and i used to chat and shit but then it turned out she wasn't who she said she was in fact she was a guy and now i'm trolling for a new love here on i-mock but shit...i don't know...word might get out but so far achimp hasn't made a carton of me that i can use as my siggy

.i could go on but i think i love you and you need to make the next move....
May 7th, 2007 12:09 AM
Perndog
My new stories

I was planning to post here, but then things suddenly got even more awesomely fucked up. Joy.

Immediately after I left the boards way back when, I met a nice girl and we dated for a year and a half. I broke up with her last spring because we were spending too much time together and I felt stifled. But we still hung out a fair bit. She didn't take the whole thing so well, and she spent the summer hoping we could get back together. By August or so, she was less unhappy with things, and the sexual tension that came from breaking up but staying close led us to start sleeping together again, with the understanding that it didn't mean we were actually a couple again. This seemed to work.

When school got back in (she was a senior and I was out of school, living elsewhere in the city for the first time), I learned she'd been spending a lot of time with this other guy, whom I knew somewhat. I thought, good, she has someone else to occupy her so she won't be making such demands on my time anymore.

It shortly became obvious to me that this guy was really into her, but it seemed like she didn't want to really hook up with him because she was still holding out for me. I thought, whatever, we're still cooling off slowly, I'm happy with the way things are, and whatever they've got going on can stay between them.

Things continued to cool off to the point where we weren't fucking or fooling around anymore about three months ago. Then last month she tells me we can't spend so much time in public together because she's "kind of dating [the other guy] and people have started asking awkward questions." I say fine, all the best to you. It doesn't bother me.

Then today, the day before they're leaving together on a trip with the college band for a week (and by themselves for a week after that), the guy calls me and invites me out for coffee so we can chat. Apparently they actually hooked up way back in August but she's just been keeping him at arm's length since then, telling him he can't call her his girlfriend and that she doesn't want him to talk to me about them. So it's been horribly uncomfortable for him (he's kind of shy and uncomfortable in the first place). On top of that, I learn that she's been lying to him about when she's spending time with me ("I have to do homework tonight, bye." Then as he leaves he catches her rushing out to her car and taking off.) And for the most part, it seems, lying to me about when she's spending time with him, for whatever reason. She graduated from college yesterday and told him that she didn't have any time to spend with him yesterday because she was going to be with her family all day, but she went to lunch with me and then out in the evening with me too. So I clarified to him how ill-informed I'd been and exactly the nature of my relationship with the girl. I told him we were still spending nights together (last night in fact) but it had been totally platonic for a few months and I didn't even know they were dating until recently.

So now the other guy, who is fairly decisive despite his nervousness, is just about ready to call it quits with her because he doesn't want to deal with this sneaky shit. And they're leaving together tomorrow and will spend the last several days of the trip mostly alone together.

Sadly, this is more of their fuck-up than mine, because I feel pretty good about my own situation and neither of them is mad at me, so there's not a lot of room for you all to bash me about it. Fortunately, I have a couple of better bits.

I'm flying to Boston to visit summer fling girl in two weeks (yes, the one from our last little forum adventure). I won't start with any more details, because it will be more fun to let Chimp assume the worst and run with it.

And I started getting close to a freshman girl this year (I still play in the college orchestra, which gives me a chance to still mingle with the current students). We didn't spend a lot of time together or anything, but there are a couple of sparks there. She's leaving tomorrow too, and after the band trip she's going back home to Montana for the summer. We said goodbye on Friday. The kicker here is that I told her I'm going to go visit her (requiring an 18-hour bus ride or a $450 plane ticket). This is obviously a little creepy on some level, because a) usually only bestest friends or actual boyfriends would do such a thing and b) I'm four years older than she is, which is still a big deal when the girl is 19 (at least with this kind of girl). There is an angle that's going to make it not so creepy and hopefully make the whole thing end very well for everyone involved, but again, it's more fun if you just assume that I'm going to completely fuck it up.

In the meantime, I'm going to try to hook up with that little redhead over the summer (I mentioned her right before I left). The incredibly innocent one, who's turning 21 next month and is actually growing up a lot but has still never been on a date in her life. Nothing happened last time I tried to get to her, because I hooked up with that other girl and we dated for a long time. And no, she's not actually fat, that part was a joke.

Oh yeah, and last spring I flew all the way to London to visit this Internet girl because I wanted to have sex with her. We met once when she came to Minneapolis a year earlier, and she gave me an awesome blowjob, and then she was pretty happy that I was coming to see her again. But once I was there she shot me down because she had had a couple of bad experiences while she was over there and was nervous. And because we were both different from last time we met (she's a real hardcore whiny liberal and I'm really not, which bothers her), so now she didn't really like me anymore anyway. We've spoken only once since then.

It would probably be the icing on the cake if I were asking for advice, but I'm afraid I can't offer that. Anyway, I hope you appreciate the effort I've put in to supply you with quality entertainment.

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