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Jul 19th, 2009 03:16 AM
Fathom Zero I worked eight-hour days during school at the golf course. Still work there, though not for much longer.
Jul 19th, 2009 02:30 AM
executioneer yeah you can work as young as 14 with the right permits from what i remember
Jul 19th, 2009 12:27 AM
LordSappington Hey, when I was 15, I worked 12 hour shifts for $6 an hour at my Tae Kwon Do school.
Jul 18th, 2009 10:33 PM
The Leader Wouldn't that be against child labor laws?
Jul 18th, 2009 10:26 PM
elx gamestopsux,end story
Jul 18th, 2009 03:01 PM
LordSappington
Jul 17th, 2009 10:47 PM
ZeldaQueen
Quote:
I had this one guy who was a reptile "expert" take the snakes we would impound. He was a short greasy, smelly sort of guy who tried to impress the ladies with his exotic hobby. Anyways he was called in to pick up a snake we caught, The snake was about 4 ft boa and it was aggressive. This snake would hiss and strike at the glass everytime someone would go into the room to clean. I warned this guy about the snake being aggressive. He said I didn't know a thing about snakes about since this species is known to be docile. He spent about 10 mins chatting me up and trying to impress me with his snake knowledge. He was able to get the hissing snake out of the cage and instead of putting it into another cage to carry out, he let it coil around his arm and started to walk out. Just as he was leaving two very pretty young ladies walked in looking to adopt a kitten. They see the snake and ask the guy a question about it. As he started into his "lets impress the ladies speech" about snakes, while petting the snake in the head. Suddenly the snake opened wide and bit his hand and latched on, and stared to tighten the coil around his arm. The ladies kinda giggled and asked him if it hurt...I walked over and asked if he needed help removing the snake or if he wanted me to call for medical help (I guess it did not help that I was laughing) Thru clenched teeth he said "No" and walked to his car with the snake still biting him, blood all over his hand, and his fingers turning blue. Good thing that species of snake was "docile".
Well that's exactly the reason why guys shouldn't try to impress girls with their big snakes.
Jul 14th, 2009 03:25 PM
Dimnos
Quote:
Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost View Post
It's really mentally taxing when you have to talk to the south. I don't know who came up with this fucking idea either: If you're from Jamaica and come to the united states to move to Jamaica, NY. I'm really good with different dialects and accents but Jamaican-English takes me a few minutes to get used to and they don't ever give you the time you need to adjust and just act like assholes right away.
Just ask him "Do wut now?"
Jul 14th, 2009 03:18 PM
b_squared I have work stories from animal control job. Every now and again we get calls about large snakes. Usually boas or pythons which escaped their cages or set loose by owners tired of keeping them.
I had this one guy who was a reptile "expert" take the snakes we would impound. He was a short greasy, smelly sort of guy who tried to impress the ladies with his exotic hobby. Anyways he was called in to pick up a snake we caught, The snake was about 4 ft boa and it was aggressive. This snake would hiss and strike at the glass everytime someone would go into the room to clean. I warned this guy about the snake being aggressive. He said I didn't know a thing about snakes about since this species is known to be docile. He spent about 10 mins chatting me up and trying to impress me with his snake knowledge. He was able to get the hissing snake out of the cage and instead of putting it into another cage to carry out, he let it coil around his arm and started to walk out. Just as he was leaving two very pretty young ladies walked in looking to adopt a kitten. They see the snake and ask the guy a question about it. As he started into his "lets impress the ladies speech" about snakes, while petting the snake in the head. Suddenly the snake opened wide and bit his hand and latched on, and stared to tighten the coil around his arm. The ladies kinda giggled and asked him if it hurt...I walked over and asked if he needed help removing the snake or if he wanted me to call for medical help (I guess it did not help that I was laughing) Thru clenched teeth he said "No" and walked to his car with the snake still biting him, blood all over his hand, and his fingers turning blue. Good thing that species of snake was "docile".
Another time we had to impound two aggressive dogs who tore up some poor guy. Parts of this guy was shredded and about 1/3 of his scalp and ear were missing. After the dogs were impounded and put in the kennel one of the dogs horked up. Out came a peice of the guys scalp and ear. Gross. That scalp vomit had to be bagged up as evidence and we called to the Dr. to see if they could use it to be reattached. ( It couldn't ). The guy survived.
Jul 13th, 2009 06:59 PM
10,000 Volt Ghost It's really mentally taxing when you have to talk to the south. I don't know who came up with this fucking idea either: If you're from Jamaica and come to the united states to move to Jamaica, NY. I'm really good with different dialects and accents but Jamaican-English takes me a few minutes to get used to and they don't ever give you the time you need to adjust and just act like assholes right away.
Jul 13th, 2009 06:12 PM
Tadao Sounds like a really challenging job.
Jul 13th, 2009 06:02 PM
10,000 Volt Ghost I don't know what bothers me more at work:

1) When someone doesn't understand me and they answer with "Do wut Naaw?"

2) When I ask someone for the FIRST NAME and they answer with "Chad Stevenson"
Jul 7th, 2009 04:48 AM
Dixie the first week of jersey boys i worked 76 hours or so
i love my job
Jul 7th, 2009 04:29 AM
BillyBear hard day
Jul 4th, 2009 09:41 PM
Colonel Flagg These two stories gave me whiplash.

I was once involved in a demonstration from a vendor trying to sell us a piece of fairly expensive ($50k) equipment. The vendor was a garage business, as far as I knew the only employee in his business. I was fairly new in my position, so I was reticent for most of the demo. However, it became clear to me after a half-hour or so that he was selling us smoke and mirrors. So I thought of a pretty good question to ask the guy that could expose the weakness in his equipment. I asked, and he looked ready to answer, when the Director of Operations looked at me and screamed (no hyperbole) at me to shut the hell up and let the guy do his demonstration, and stop asking stupid questions. I was so appalled by this situation that I clammed up - probably not what I would do at this point in my career, but there you go.

Later, the same director sees me in the hallway, and states that he was just trying to give me some "coaching".

As it shook out, the company wasted all told about $250k in goods, materials, software and hardware, and man-hours trying to generate useful information our of a device that I knew wouldn't work before it was purchased. As a sidebar, the DO was fired 2 years later for unethical business practices. Go figure.
Jul 4th, 2009 08:00 PM
ZeldaQueen A few summers ago, my neighbor hired routinely as a babysitter for her young daughter and son. Things mostly went well, but there was one evening when things were a bit rocky.

The daughter had some sinus problems which meant that she was to be given a pill every night at bed. This was no problem. But that night, she apparently had a head cold and her mother told me that when I put the kids to bed, I was to give her a dose of medicine for her stuffy nose.

So, come bed time I get the kids to change their clothes, brush their teeth, etc. Then, I pour the dose of medicine and ask the girl to drink it. She goes nuts and starts sobbing that she doesn't want to take the medicine. I didn't get it myself. It wasn't like it was that nasty tasting (grape flavored, it was pretty much the only medicine I actually liked as a child). I try to get her to take it, her brother tries to convince her, nothing works. I decide to try to calm her down first, so I tell her it's alright, just get into bed. My plan was loosely to wait until she was in bed and tired and then get her to drink the medicine by pretending it was water or something. But at about the time she was in bed, her parents came home. I met them at the door and told them I was sorry but the girl wouldn't take the medicine. The mother told me not to worry, if she didn't want to take the medicine, she didn't have to.

This confused me a bit because in my life, I always figured that medicine was assigned to you for medical reasons and therefore if you wanted to stay healthy you just take it no matter how bad it tasted. In any case, I felt rather sorry for my own mom, as I still have memories of her holding me down to take Robitussin whenever I was sick as a child.
Jul 4th, 2009 05:44 PM
J. Tithonus Pednaud *removed under threat of unemployment*
Jan 20th, 2008 08:59 PM
Zomboid Wonderful.
Jan 20th, 2008 08:42 PM
Emu You are a god damn hero.
Jan 20th, 2008 06:45 PM
Zbu Manowar Okay, I'll try to break out one more story. Not to get my crown back, but because this is just strange.

A few years ago I worked at an indie video store just outside of Ann Arbor in this little city with a bad water supply. The problem with this city is that it was close enough to Ann Arbor to eventually be enveloped by it thanks to urban sprawl. Before the sprawl, it was redneck heaven with tractor pulls and tons of farmland and houses that stretched back to the 1800s. After? It was still hickish but now had a lot of people imitating the rich people lifestyle as they saw it: tons of name brand clothing, expensive cars, expensive housing. Sadly, the income was nowhere near Ann Arbor levels. A fellow who moonlighted at the video store was a mailman by day and told everybody stories of how these big fancy houses with BMWs and the like were completely empty. One look inside would show a lack of furniture or anybody who lived there would put up or own. There was a TV, a chair, and nothing else.

This city--whose name I will not reveal for the obvious reasons--was essentially the epitome of pathetic yuppie excess without the money to back it up. And this included the mayor and the city council.

The reason the indie store was able to remain in business was due to two parts: we were the only ones who rented porn, and the head of the business was using it as a tax writeoff: we would only take in a hundred dollars of profit per night, even on the weekends. And everybody in that town, despite their newfound yuppie values and overt Christianity, loved the fucking porn. It wasn't even good porn, it was the cheapest that could be bought in bulk. But it was honey to a beehive, and that's how I made my bread.

Until one day when the Mayor's little snowflake of a daughter decided not to return a tape on time. For a week.

The charge was $20 and if nobody dicked us around with it, we would cut it in half. The Mayor, however, was one of those 'career professional women' who had the short annoying haircut and the business suit. She did not want to talk about this. She didn't even want to admit to it. She wanted it gone because she was the big bad mayor and she didn't think it was proper for someone in her position--as the mayor of a perfectly pathetic community--to pay for late fees. You know, because she was important and everything.

The owner of the business didn't give a right fuck what happened. The District Manager wasn't going to do anything about it. If it had to be sent to collections on principle, it was going to happen. So the letters of protest started: professional letters on the Mayor's letterhead, unprofessional and badly handwritten letters with vague threats taped to the door of our establishment, the whole works. Finally, the coup de grace. The Mayor walks into our store one day, tosses a letter on our counter, and walks out without a fucking word.

The letter inside was basically a typed threat (in businessese) noting how our business was now being investigated because of the rental of pornography to minors and various other shit. Because, you know, it was the mayor's daughter who didn't return it and since the Mayor was denying responsibility....

And this is when I snapped. The manager was my sister's boyfriend at the time, and I asked him if I could respond to this in a way that would benefit everybody involved. He agreed. And I set to my work.

A few days later the Mayor's office received a large package sent by registered mail. Within was a number of records we had since the business had opened. These were the records of every single movie rented and/or bought from our location since opening of every single member of the City Council, the Mayor, and various workers under the Mayor's employ that were unlucky enough to have their names listed at their offices. The movies rented were shown when they were rented and returned, how much the totals were, and the title of every single one in beautiful black and white. Also enclosed was a statement of our policy in regards to total compliance with the proper authorities in regards to situations such as these. We had the names, dates, and personal information of every single major person in power in that shithole city along with their rental records.

Guess how much of that was porn. No, rather, guess how much of that wasn't porn.

My final addition to this was on the letter itself. I'm sure such business types like that knew was cc: meant. As a final gag, I put in various email and snail address to the various news stations in the Detroit area who I knew would be fascinated with the story of the Mayor who tried to bully a small video store when her daughter wouldn't return her porn. And I was ready to send it, too, unless a deal could be made.

Her bill was paid off the next fucking day, in person. And the rest of the debts ran up by the city council just happened to get paid later that week as well. Odd that.
Jan 17th, 2008 03:35 PM
Cosmo Electrolux the black letters represent his black heart.... :emofag

but, the gorilla suit story was pretty funny.....i lol'd.....
Jan 17th, 2008 03:28 PM
Sam I knew he was a dick the second I saw BLACK TEXT.

DICK DICK DICK DICK DICK DICK DICK
Jan 17th, 2008 03:10 PM
MarioRPG The ape thing was cool.
Jan 17th, 2008 08:04 AM
Chojin I was going to say pretty much verbatim what Pednaud did.
Jan 17th, 2008 06:55 AM
MLE a second ago, you thought it was one of your proudest achievements, due to your saying "The best part is..." right afterwards.

You are why people are no longer good.
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