Eight fucking minutes? I love these videos as much as the next guy, but there is no way I am watching captain bitchtits drone his way through some wannabe philosophical bullshit for that long.

YEAH I KNOW. And why does he care? Hes not getting fucked during his life or heaven.

So I just kind of let it play in the background while I was farting around on I-Mock, and he gets really really agitated by about 5:27 and sounds like he is about to BURST INTO TEARS OF PASSION over this, and then at the end he makes his closing statement really wearily and then sighs like he's got the weight of the world on his shoulders. It made me lol, but the first five minutes are skipable.

"And you always use this orgies in heaven crap. I never said anything about orgies, you always... YOU PEOPLE! YOU IDIOTS! YOU ALWAYS JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS! I DON'T WANT ORGIES IN HEAVEN, I WANT ROMANCE! I WANNA DO IT WITH ONE PERSON!"

Jeez louise.

HE WANTS ROMANCE PEOPLE! ROSE PETALS ON THE BED KIND OF ROMANCE!

hhahahhahaa, he sounds so sad ;o

This kind of romance?

I'm glad he's finally wearing something that isn't just an under shirt.

He seems to throw up in his mouth when he talks about Buddhists.

Man, he's got some flapjack titties.

Yes, they pale in comparison to your own baseball-like roundness.

"FOR THREE YEARS I'VE HAD TO DEAL WITH THIS! I'VE HAD TO DEAL WITH THESE CRACKPOTS ON THE...ON THE INTERNET!"

who the fuck is this guy and why should i watch his video

fuck him if he sucks so bad why do you guys give him so much attention? i won't ever watch this shit!

Get off my internet :o

http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/searc...searchid=39909

I AM PROUD OF THEM TOO.

Pot. Kettle. Blech!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtutfY11D0k
He said he was going to make today's video about how horrible our website is. He is full of lies.

He gets less agitated in this one than the sexless heaven thing, but here he is not even making any sense. He jumps from STDs to abstinance until marrage to not kissing a girl until you marry her to EVIL CHRISTIANS to condoms made from sheep intestines being blown up like ballons and right back to STDs, and it is the kind of CRAZY ROLLERCOASTER OF CONTROVERSY only Jonathan Clement can put you on!

The fatty is also slow. He was supposed to post the most recent video on Thursday

EDIT: It's hysterical to see him bashing marriage - Obviously because he'll never get the chance for it :lol

whining little bastard.
i mean, who the hell he think he is to question all those things?

not to mention the cheap setting, to see him sitting on his bed and talking crap is bad enough, and bring in some random guy just to show he's got a friend? pathetic...
and it seems that he cared nothing but SEX. does he really think any girls would TOUCHED by his words?

last but not least, he always seems PISSED for no reason at all...
we should make a game out of him, really.
http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/showt...php?t=69697293

I demand to know who MicrowavedGrape is. Because he/she made the only single youtube comment yet that didn't make me want to slap someone.

That would be guitar woman.

:( now i feel dirty.

:orgasm

Woo hoo, people internet love me again!

He deleted my comment on the Sexless Heaven video, he just couldn't handle the HARSH REALITY of it :<

I now declare the "he/she" in my original post to be retroactively funny.