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-   -   Fragrant Vaginas (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=12739)

kellychaos Jul 16th, 2004 02:55 PM

Fragrant Vaginas
 
Is perfume on the vagina merely a perk or is it a masking device used to disguise whatever veneral soup is cookin' down there? Discuss.

FartinMowler Jul 16th, 2004 03:10 PM

My best friend in High school was a guy named Steven who was like 6'4" and had this hot girlfriend over at his house everyday and would sneek her out before his dad came home from work... So one day I went over around dinner time to hang out and I was standing in the Hallway of the basement and his dad comes down the stairs and passes by me and goes into Stevens room and then exits. As his dad passes me again he leans over and say's "I can smell pussy", "so when Steven's finished having a dump tell him I'm upstairs waiting to talk to him". I went into Stevens room and took a good wiff cause I never smelled pussy, but I didn't smell anything :/ I know what it smell's like now :)

liquidstatik Jul 16th, 2004 03:11 PM

It seems like spraying perfume in yer vagina would burn. :(

kellychaos Jul 16th, 2004 03:12 PM

I'll take "Things often said while standing next to Fartin" for $400, Alex.

sadie Jul 16th, 2004 03:24 PM

lol

KittyHead Jul 16th, 2004 04:11 PM

Are you asking this cause you know someone that sprays thier puss with perfume? Perfume is alcohol based and that can lead to serious infection..... it wouldnt smell too purty after that now would it?

FartinMowler Jul 16th, 2004 04:12 PM

Kittyhead looks like some girl that works at a mall perfume counter :/

KittyHead Jul 16th, 2004 04:15 PM

i look like one? or i talk like one??

hopefully not the latter.

FartinMowler Jul 16th, 2004 04:27 PM

:rolleyes I need more beer to find you intelligent or is it the latter?

KittyHead Jul 16th, 2004 04:36 PM

you think im unintelligent because i spouted out a few words about perfume? *shrugs*

FartinMowler Jul 16th, 2004 04:44 PM

this is like talking to my wife... >: Listen I don't like standing outside a womens store and waiting for you, so I'm gonna go look at stereo stuff, o.k,?

Matt Harty Jul 16th, 2004 04:46 PM

Kitty don't talk again or he'll punch you in the face! :eek

Matt Harty Jul 16th, 2004 04:46 PM

jk fartin good times

KittyHead Jul 16th, 2004 04:49 PM

youre married? im sorry. ill be nicer. you have enough troubles....

You go look at boy things and ill squabble over here with the other wifeys. mmkay?

FartinMowler Jul 16th, 2004 04:51 PM

Quote:

Kitty don't talk again or he'll punch you in the face!
Where do you knuckleheads come up with the violent shit? I'm the most passive guy you will ever meet :/ I'm a lover and would never do violent things to anyone. I wrote this song..

If I where to love you
If I where to love you truefully
If I where to love you honestly
I would know what love would be
I would know what love would mean
If you where to love me. :)

so shut the fuck up.

KittyHead Jul 16th, 2004 05:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *FARTINMOWLER*

If I were to love you
If I were to love you truefully
If I were to love you honestly
I would know what love would be
I would know what love would mean
If you were to love me. :)

so shut the fuck up.

:P

nice poem. will you serenade me now? :love

FartinMowler Jul 16th, 2004 06:09 PM

Ok

I met a lady named Kitty
who reminds me of my friend who had a Cat named shitty
the cat would crap all over the room and cough up balls and when I said "you fucking cat?" It would just stare at me like a typical stupid kitty.

liquidstatik Jul 16th, 2004 06:12 PM

Are you mad that she's prettier than yer daughter? :o

FartinMowler Jul 16th, 2004 06:17 PM

YOu seem like you have an imagination so get off repeating the same shit. My kids are kids, not your tool to try and aggravate me. I post that I have kids because I'm proud to be a dad and some people know not to make crude and senseless remarks.

liquidstatik Jul 16th, 2004 06:19 PM

I've never made fun of yer kids before. :(


And I was just kidding.. geez. :(:(

Matt Harty Jul 16th, 2004 06:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *FARTINMOWLER*
Quote:

Kitty don't talk again or he'll punch you in the face!
Where do you knuckleheads come up with the violent shit? I'm the most passive guy you will ever meet :/ I'm a lover and would never do violent things to anyone. I wrote this song..

If I where to love you
If I where to love you truefully
If I where to love you honestly
I would know what love would be
I would know what love would mean
If you where to love me. :)

so shut the fuck up.

fartin i said jk afterwards omg >:

liquidstatik Jul 16th, 2004 06:31 PM

Fartin must be in a bad mood today :(

Matt Harty Jul 16th, 2004 06:31 PM

Hope he doesnt beat someone lol.

Matt Harty Jul 16th, 2004 06:32 PM

JK

liquidstatik Jul 16th, 2004 06:34 PM

You might want to make it bigger so he doesnt skim over it! :O

Matt Harty Jul 16th, 2004 06:35 PM

:eek run!

KittyHead Jul 16th, 2004 07:00 PM

ok kiddo.... Haiku time

Fartinmowler is
Not very good at poems
So go take a nap

<3 <3

Matt Harty Jul 16th, 2004 07:15 PM

LOL

the[Hitman] Jul 16th, 2004 09:35 PM

wow, fartin should definately donkey punch someone for that...

sadie Jul 16th, 2004 09:38 PM

ohno. fartin's after the kittygirl. :chatter

Esuohlim Jul 17th, 2004 01:32 AM

Haha "Not very good at poems" doesn't have enough syllables are you eating the irony up because I sure am.

While we're on the subject of eating things up, let's start a conversation about fragrant vaginas. :eek

ArrowX Jul 17th, 2004 02:01 AM

Kelly Keeps these forums alive :(

Sethomas Jul 17th, 2004 02:20 AM

And fucking stupid.

ArrowX Jul 17th, 2004 02:42 AM

no that job is spread throuought the ranks from me to sports

liquidstatik Jul 17th, 2004 09:26 AM

Is that worth bragging about? :X

Snatchtastic Jul 17th, 2004 09:54 AM

.
 
The middle part of the thread is hillarious.

kellychaos Jul 17th, 2004 11:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KittyHead
Are you asking this cause you know someone that sprays thier puss with perfume? Perfume is alcohol based and that can lead to serious infection..... it wouldnt smell too purty after that now would it?

I doubt that the wemens tip the bottle of perfume directly into their pooky-holes, you cum-dumpster. I meant around the toxic area.

Pyorrhea Jul 17th, 2004 10:43 PM

alchohol is completely sterile you dipshits.... it cant infect anything! it kills all viruses and bacteria on contact! ya Cum-Dumpsters! (thanks kelly, for that great word!)

Pub Lover Jul 17th, 2004 10:48 PM

It can irritate though, & then infection can occur in the irritated areas. :eek

Pyorrhea Jul 17th, 2004 10:51 PM

irritation only comes from the alchohol... thus your a dipshit for getting it irrirtated in the first place, so you scracth.... germs from scratching your ass during your sleep become imbedded in your skin and it becomes infected... still not DIRECTLY from the alchohol in the perfume though.... and as kelly said, who spays it in the vagina any way... if anything itd be the pubic region (not that id know since i am a male chauvanist that uses women and destroys their lives!) hahahahahah!

KittyHead Jul 17th, 2004 11:11 PM

Quote:

I doubt that the wemens tip the bottle of perfume directly into their pooky-holes, you cum-dumpster. I meant around the toxic area.
HAHA. Twas a joke hun. Its ok though, you dont have to understand. And i never mentioned anything about sticking it "up" in there... so uh..... yeah.

Quote:

irritation only comes from the alchohol...
ok, yeah, thats what i said.

Quote:

still not DIRECTLY from the alchohol in the perfume though....
didnt you *just* say that the irritation came from the alcohol?? eh.. whatever.

Quote:

alchohol is completely sterile you dipshits.... it cant infect anything!
yeah, ok, but it can definitely irritate the puss. vaginas are sensitive and when they get irritated they can get infected very easily. just fyi.... ;)

Pub Lover Jul 17th, 2004 11:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KittyHead
Are you asking this cause you know someone that sprays thier puss with perfume? Perfume is alcohol based and that can lead to serious infection..... it wouldnt smell too purty after that now would it?

What did she say? 'Can lead to...' Is that what she said? :blah

& I've got an irritated nothing, to match my infected nothing. >:

Pyorrhea Jul 17th, 2004 11:35 PM

PWNED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pub Lover Jul 17th, 2004 11:36 PM

No Seriously. :blah

Pyorrhea Jul 17th, 2004 11:39 PM

well, analdestruction.com

Jebus Jul 18th, 2004 11:20 PM

what the fuck is truefully?

KittyHead Jul 19th, 2004 01:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim
Haha "Not very good at poems" doesn't have enough syllables are you eating the irony up because I sure am.

While we're on the subject of eating things up, let's start a conversation about fragrant vaginas. :eek

Also.... i missed this post...

*ahem*

here are the syllables....

not (1) ve (2) ry (3) good (4) at (5) po (6) ems (7)

there seems to be 7 syllables to me... but i could be mistaken... <3 :P

Big McLargehuge Jul 19th, 2004 01:37 PM

you say po-ems what a whore :(

KittyHead Jul 19th, 2004 01:38 PM

hahaha, yeah, you got me, im a total whore. Damn those po-em whores, damn them all!

Esuohlim Jul 19th, 2004 01:45 PM

OK WHATEVER KITTYHEAD I'M GOING TO READ SOME PO-EMS NOW

KittyHead Jul 19th, 2004 01:55 PM

awesome. im happy for you. let me know how that goes for you. ;)

Matt Harty Jul 19th, 2004 01:57 PM

I THINK IM GONNA GO READ SOME PO-EMS TOO

kellychaos Jul 19th, 2004 03:07 PM

Kittyhead,

Plz go get the butter and bite down on the pillow 'cause I don't want to hear your caterwauling. :brando

glowbelly Jul 20th, 2004 09:25 AM

there's perfumy type things that are specifically made for vaginas that leave you smelling nice and fresh especially after a nasty period.

you gotta take care of your snatch >:

KittyHead Jul 20th, 2004 10:49 AM

^^ very true.

Mr. Vagiclean Jul 20th, 2004 11:13 AM

^x^

kellychaos Jul 20th, 2004 02:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by glowbelly
there's perfumy type things that are specifically made for vaginas that leave you smelling nice and fresh especially after a nasty period.

you gotta take care of your snatch >:

But is a fragrant vagina a sign of diligent snatch care or a warning light to some underlying, chronic problem? Just sayin'

glowbelly Jul 20th, 2004 02:29 PM

if a girl has a chronic stinky pinky there's nothing that's gonna cover that shit up.

and it's usually a sign that somethin ain't right down below.

Cosmo Electrolux Jul 20th, 2004 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by glowbelly
if a girl has a chronic stinky pinky there's nothing that's gonna cover that shit up.

and it's usually a sign that somethin ain't right down below.

this made me laugh out loud at work......:(

kellychaos Jul 20th, 2004 02:50 PM

It's true. :(

Jixby Phillips Jul 20th, 2004 04:26 PM

^^ very true.

Terra Jul 20th, 2004 06:18 PM

It happens to be a well known scientific fact that women who are NOT attracted to a male candidate will emit a rather foul stench in order to drive him away. Should a man come into close proximity that she wants to procreate with, the female will immediately change her scent to the smell of cookies. Or that of double crunch chocolate chip ice cream. Brownies if she is ready to bear your child.

If you fucksticks ever smell cookies when you are in a roomful of women, ONE of them might be trying to lure you into her snatch.

But they will never tell you directly. You will just have to get down on your hands and knees, snort and rut around their crotches like a pig.

liquidstatik Jul 20th, 2004 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by glowbelly
there's perfumy type things that are specifically made for vaginas that leave you smelling nice and fresh especially after a nasty period.

you gotta take care of your snatch >:

That sounds extrememly gross. :x

Matt Harty Jul 20th, 2004 06:42 PM

this whole thread is ew :x

Terra Jul 20th, 2004 06:47 PM

You don't like cookies? :faint

Hugh_Bristic Jul 20th, 2004 10:06 PM

You're filthy and unfunny.

MLE Jul 20th, 2004 11:07 PM

:love glowbelly

Sajuuk Jul 20th, 2004 11:16 PM

Stinky. >:

Emu Jul 20th, 2004 11:19 PM

You are the worst poster on the boards.

MLE Jul 20th, 2004 11:56 PM

YOU CAN'T MOCK HER SHE HAS A PURDY AVATAR >:

Dole Jul 21st, 2004 03:18 AM

Blokes grossed out by vaginas do not deserve to be having sex.

KittyHead Jul 21st, 2004 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Terra
It happens to be a well known scientific fact that women who are NOT attracted to a male candidate will emit a rather foul stench in order to drive him away. Should a man come into close proximity that she wants to procreate with, the female will immediately change her scent to the smell of cookies. Or that of double crunch chocolate chip ice cream. Brownies if she is ready to bear your child.

If you fucksticks ever smell cookies when you are in a roomful of women, ONE of them might be trying to lure you into her snatch.

But they will never tell you directly. You will just have to get down on your hands and knees, snort and rut around their crotches like a pig.


HAHAHA!! best post ever! that definitely made me laugh out loud.

Cosmo Electrolux Jul 21st, 2004 11:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Terra
It happens to be a well known scientific fact that women who are NOT attracted to a male candidate will emit a rather foul stench in order to drive him away. Should a man come into close proximity that she wants to procreate with, the female will immediately change her scent to the smell of cookies. Or that of double crunch chocolate chip ice cream. Brownies if she is ready to bear your child.

If you fucksticks ever smell cookies when you are in a roomful of women, ONE of them might be trying to lure you into her snatch.

But they will never tell you directly. You will just have to get down on your hands and knees, snort and rut around their crotches like a pig.

so, what does it mean if they smell like tuna salad or lobster thermidor?

ArrowX Jul 21st, 2004 01:34 PM

ok then you need a paper bag, garden hose, a douche, and a coat hanger.

kellychaos Jul 21st, 2004 02:37 PM

You are an infragrant vagina. >:

Terra Jul 21st, 2004 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cosmo Electrolux
so, what does it mean if they smell like tuna salad or lobster thermidor?

Well obviously they are in menses and want you to hold that thought until they are finished with it. Try not to be fooled when they say they are done with it. Many have made that mistake.

If you don't smell cookies, they don't want you.

Sajuuk Jul 21st, 2004 06:12 PM

I just baked cookies...

ArrowX Jul 21st, 2004 06:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kellychaos
You are an infragrant vagina. >:

I don't even have a vagina (much to my dismay)

Terra Jul 22nd, 2004 08:59 PM

You need a pussy to have a vagina. :)

Staying on the Internet will never get you one either.

ArrowX Jul 22nd, 2004 11:16 PM

point?....

executioneer Jul 22nd, 2004 11:49 PM

:rolleyes @ this thread


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