Attention: Lars and PJalne
 

You have terrorized the coastal line of the country of I-Mockery long enough with your raids, Vikings. FartinMowler and I challange you to battle! We will destroy you and your silly horned hats!

Ha, just be sure to wear your chastity belt. We will raid your village and eat your cattle if Lars ever comes out from lurking again, and if he does, Fartin better have one of those belts handy as well.

PS. The horned helmets are a stereotype >:

Wait...being carried off by cute blonde Scandanavians and made into a sex slave...that actually sounds rather enjo...
*snaps out of it*
No...I must remain focused...I must protect I-Mockery!
*begins to build a stockade around the village*

Bah, your stockade will do nothing to save you. Soon, you will both be bound by the entrails of your own kin in the hollow of the earth while a snake drips poison on you, and there you will stay until Fenrir devours the moon and Middle Earth comes to an end.


The Norse Middle Earth. Not the Hobbit Middle Earth.

Not before I make some misteltoe into a spear and trick Lars into throwing it at you!

Ahahaha, Lars isn't blind.

If you still manage to trick him, you better fucking cry for me though >:

Now why would I cry for you? What have you ever done for me? >:
I'll throw pot onto your funeral pyre and laugh as all the mourners get high! HA!

I voulenteered to ravish you just a few posts ago, I did >:

Hmm...you did, didn't y-
No! I must not let that stand in the way of my mission to rid I-Mockery of the Viking scourge! I must keep the heathen hordes from destroying the monestery!
Brothers! Get the boiling oil ready!

Well, in that case I'll just go dress up like a bear and build my rage in the forest.

Before:



After:

I'm not ready and pjalne sister did't show up so let me go have a shower and something to eat and I will be back in an hour or two.

Now who am I going to get to help heat the oil?! >: Fuck!
Maybe if I pour the monestery chamberpots on their heads....

Sorry about that thought I needed to do a #2 . I don't think I would be very good in battle with my weak bowels.

Goddamnit, where's Lars?

LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARS!!!!

My brother in mead, I need you!

In a non-gay way.

pjalne is Norway like Findland? Do you have sauna's naked with you mom and dad and uncle Erik?

No >:

Is Canada like Mexico? Are you all dirty and lazy?

*head pops up from behind the wall, like in the Holy Grail*
Finland was settled by Czechs, wasn't it?

*Shouting from the middle of the forest, close to reaching berserker mode now*

NOBODY'S 100% SURE, BUT MOST EVIDENCE SUGGESTS CZECHS WERE RATHER NOMADIC IN THE PAST, SPREADING ACROSS EUROPE!!!! SCIENTISTS HAVE DISCOVERED THAT THE LANGUAGE SPOKEN IN FINNISH VILLAGES ARE VERY SIMILAR TO OLD CZECH DIALECTS, SO IT'S A VALID THEORY!!!!! THE LANGUAGE BELONGS TO WHAT I THINK IS CALLED THE FINNISH-UGRIAN BRANCH IN ENGLISH, AND IS QUITE DIFFERENT FROM THE GERMANIC LANGUAGES OTHERWISE DOMINANT IN THE OLD SCANDINAVIAN SECTOR (THESE DAYS MORE PRECICELY REFERRED TO AS 'NORDEN')!!!!!!! I'M TALKING FROM MEMORY HERE, SO I CAN'T GUARANTEE I'M COMPLETELY RIGHT!!!! HOPE THIS HELPS!!!


OH, AND FARTIN IS A JOTNEBÆSJ!!!!!

Very interesting.
*scurries back behind wall to hide the treasure where the invaders won't find it*

I tried the Norwegian to english dictionary but couldn't find what JOTNEBÆSJ is :/ pjalne is a hockeypuck!!!!!!

WTF! Why the fuck does it feel like im missing all the good shit
that happens on the board?

I hate this battle. I hate fartinmowler. I don't think that this war needs me. It's already gayed up, and not in a good way.

AHAHA! THE VIKING IS A COWARD! THE VIKING IS A COWARD! THE VIKING IS A COWARD!
:moon :moon :moon :moon :moon :moon :moon :moon :moon

eugh. why would you team with FM, jean?

But we haven't even started yet!

And I think you'll find the meaning of jotnebæsj if you look up jutun and bæsj seperately, Farts.

I took the time to ask Jeanette X. I put the effort into having some fun. It's too bad Legolars bowed out and I wish him luck in his life. :)

You try saying "no" to that face.

NO >:

easier than it looks :eek

-willie

SURE THING BUDDY ;)

-willie