The most horrible movie you've ever seen.
 

I did try to see if there was a previous thread for this.

The 1st most horrible movie i've seen is "Coyote Ugly". But now, I have a new number 2.

"Nacho Libre"

I am almost shaking, in anger, about watching this.
I wanna kick Jack Black in the nuts. And Mike White. And the Jared fuckhead who directed this.

House of the Dead. It's the only movie I've ever walked out of.

Ah fuck. It's pretty much impossible to narrow it down to one, but I'm gonna say that chuck and larry was probably the worst one I've seen recently. Followed closely behind that is ghost rider. Also, I refuse to see any movie with rob schneider and I'm getting to that point with anthony anderson. Both of them annoy me to the point where I just get angry and frustrated because its amazing that retards like that get paid.

Phantom Menace

The Covenant

What a piece of shit that movie was.

And that award goes to Spiderman 2, believe it or not, because "Everything M. Night Shamillionaire Did" probably doesn't count.

Date Movie

Epic Movie.

It was so uncomfortable, sitting in the silence of a packed movie theater.

Oh right, those movies. Absolutely awful. I actually know at least 2 people who find that shit hilarious.

That reminds me. LITTLE MAN. That could very well be the worst movie ever made. What makes it even worse is that some people actually like it.

chicago i walked out and a really funny horror movie named dark harvest

Pleasantville.

The fire masturbation scene made me realize there was no God, and it might be worth my while to drive to Chelsea to kick Jeff Daniels in the nuts.

Rules of Attraction

The Squid and the Whale

Spiderman 3

I liked Pleasantville. :\

Yeah, Pleasantville's great.

I usually consider Being There to be the shittiest movie I've ever seen, and while in reality that probably isn't the case, it's the one I hate the most.

seconding/thirding those shitty Date/Epic/whatever movies. There was a time where parody movies were great and didnt just rely on replaying a certain scene from a movie and making it obviously wacky or zany

I liked rules of attraction and pleasantville :(. I think there are much worse movies than that....buuuut this is all about personal taste.

Pirates of the Caribbean 3. My breaking point in that movie was when that black bitch turned huge and started screaming like godzilla. My buddies and me looked at the screen (except for the one who fell asleep) and simultaneously said "This is fucking gay" and left

Oh and Across the Universe was a complete waste of 8 dollars too. But I did get to watch predator and have sex after. So I guess that movie's good for something.

I saw awake last night. I also took a girl I'm embarrassed to be seen with in public.

I wouldn't recommend either. I got "spotted/caught" by a close friend...I keep waiting for him to call me today to make fun of me. And yeah, the movie sucked. It was a decent idea and all, but someone should have told the director that running around in scrubs is a poor way to portray an out of body experience.

Ditto. Hated the second one too.

I didn't like Awake either but calling it the most horrible movie you've ever seen is not only retarded but it's also completely lazy. Try again. >:

I really really liked The Squid and The Whale :(

The Covenant probably isnt the worst movie I've ever seen, but it's the only one that sticks out to me.

Oh man I hated the squid and the whale, it was just an ultra pretentious movie about this ultra pretentious guy. I can understand how people can like it but I was expecting a lot more out of it. I just couldn't get over the how big an asshole the dad was, nor did I want to see an entire movie based on it.

Rules of attraction was awful to me because it tried to strike a chord as something real, but it was just a typical college movie where the kids don't go to class and just do coke and weed all the time. There was no residue of reality in the relationships and setting. The only part that I liked was the emo lunch server that kills herself because she doesn't to get banged by her secret crush, and only because she was completely transparent through out the whole movie, and no one noticed her before or after she died.

Hulk.

Oh oh oh oh oh did I mention I had to watch Open Season fucking three times

because I did >:

I was going to say The Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, I had to sit through this live action adaptation of Alice In Wonderland, with Martin Short and Whoopi Goldberg in it, while babysitting once. Agonizing.

Chuck and Larry is the most juvenile, offensive piece of shit ever.

Spanglish was completely devoid of any kind of humor and was boring as fuck.

The SAW series are completely unimaginative, unintelligent shit-fests.

Monkey Bone -Dreadful in just about every respect.

One day you must tell me the level of zen or the grain alcohol you had to get through that. :)

Should I mention 'Lost Highway?' I saw that in the theater and since it'll probably never be released on DVD due to the factors surrounding its release, I don't think it's fair to even state how mindbendingly awful it is. Not even the nudity can really make it worthwhile.

Across the Universe is great! >:

Oh god, it's impossible to name just one, but here are few ones I've seen once and don't want to see again:

Mario Bros.
Alone in the dark
Street Fighter
Mortal Kombat Annihilation
Turtles 3
and couple of Van Damme's and Seagal's latest action movies, which aren't even bad good :/

I believe Lost Highway is already out on DVD. Unless the one my ex wife had was a transfer from vhs. I hated that movie and the fact that she loved it so much just makes me hate it that much more. :(

Fear Dot Com. Without a doubt.

Hey guys, I've got a great idea! We'll make a movie, right? It'll be a love story, right? But not any love story...you see. Everyone will be taken right out of different Beatles songs! And we'll also talk about WAR. And how BAD WAR is! Ok here's my idea...We'll call it ACROSS THE UNIVERSE!

So we've got our main character, Jude (just like Hey Jude! I'm so clever). Jude moved to America from England illegally and fell in love with his best friend's younger sister, Lucy! (you know, from that other Beatles song? The one about diamonds in the sky!) But Lucy has a boyfriend and Jude decided to move to New York City. Thankfully, Lucy's boyfriend was drafted into Viet Nam and was horribly killed. So she then decides to move with her older brother and Jude! A day after Lucy moves to New York, and probably only about three or four days since her old, dead, boyfriend was brutally murdered in a war, she falls for Jude and sleeps with him! At the same time covering Beatles songs we all know and love! Right? I mean, it's the Beatles! We ALL love the Beatles!

Things get a little complicated and I think we should go the route of Yellow Submarine where nothing really makes sense, all at the same time progressing Jude and Lucy's love story WHILE SINGING BEATLES SONGS! We'll get great musical artists like BONO and EDDIE IZZARD! Yes! Eddie Izzard will be in the movie! Not a musician, you say? Who cares? IT'S ACROSS THE FUCKING UNIVERSE!

And now we'll introduce a whole slew of characters like Prudence! And she's a lesbian from Nowhere! She gets trapped in the closet and she finally comes out to be a whole new person! Lucy's older brother gets drafted and goes to the Army Recruiting Center where we'll have Uncle Sam singing I Want You So Bad. He'll be shipped off to Viet Nam and show just how horrible and gruesome war is, with some tits here and there.

OK I've changed my mind on the whole Yellow Submarine thing and now I think it'd be best to make this movie all political and about war. And racial issues. Because that's really relevant, you know? All while singing BEATLES SONGS!

So Jude finally gets caught by the government and sent back to England. Where he decides that he doesn't care about anything but finding Lucy again. So he goes back to New York and he hears all the people he's been living with on a rooftop for one last performance and they're singing...Hey Jude! He's drawn onto the top of the building to find all of his friends! But...no Lucy. The oppressive police come to the top of the building to stop the ruckus. Jude is the only one left on the roof with nothing but a microphone. So he does the only thing he can do. SING SOME BEATLES SONGS until Lucy hears him and goes to the top of the roof where they kiss one last time and the movie ends!

What do you guys think? Genius, perhaps?

I liked that :(

But come the hell on! It's called Across the Universe! (GASP) A BEATLES SONG! You know that one that sucks but somehow we all know it? Yeah.

I still love that movie, so eat my ass. :(

The worst movie i've ever seen would have to be Jurassic Park 3. God that movie was absolutely horrible. The only redeemable thing about going to that god forsaken movie was that my friend and I were really high and we got to see the first preview for the first Spiderman, including the now deleted scene where he catches a helicopter in a giant web between the Twin Towers.

Napolean Dynamite sucked ass, too.

And that's why I will never take anything you do or say seriously. Anyone who thinks Across the Universe pays great homage to one of the centuries greatest musicians must never really have listened to The Beatles.

This movie butchers what was some fantastic music and throws a whole bunch of bullshit on top.

Seriously, fuck this movie. Every time I post about it I hate it even more.

I never said it paid a great homage to it. I said it was a good movie, NOTHING about this being fantastic to the Beatles and is like a suped-up version of their music. It's not and nothing ever will be. I just thought it was a good movie.

Well...you're wrong. And don't throw your opinion bullshit at me.

Throw facts at him.

Santa's Slay is the worst movie I've ever seen.

one of the final chase scenes:
Evil Santa picks up Christmas Carol while looking for 2 teenagers in a library.
Then says, "Christmas sure scares the dickens out of people."

seconded.

It IS a fact that nothing can or will be as good as the Beatles goddamnit!

"Deck The Halls" with Danny DeVito and Matthew Broderick. It will make you want to vomit anal blood.

Do you want to hurt me, sspadowsky?








Liar.

I remember having to sit through the previews for that movie when I had Comcast Digital Cable. Whenever I would try to get some On Demand TV going, it would play and it was one of those trailers that would always reveal the entire premise of the movie. Somehow the 'I'm the king of Christmas around here/no you're not, I am/no, I am' plot just made me wish that the movie would end with some crazed nerd finding an AK-47 and blowing apart the whole town, leaving Devito and Broderick dying of gaping stomach wounds.

Seriously, does Matthew Broderick even care anymore? The way his career has gone in regards to movies, I would think he would reach Steve Guttenberg levels of desperation to go back to his glory days. Devito, on the other hand, has no conscience. This is the man who was either doomed to sell used cars and live as a fifty year old virgin or do shitbombs like Junior and Twins.

Speaking of which, does anybody remember Junior? I caught a few minutes of it on cable and I realized that I hated it as much as I did when I just heard of it.

Matthew "Vehicular-Manslaughter" Broderick is the best actor ever. HAVE YOU EVEN SEEN WAR GAMES?

I'd also say anything starring Martin Lawrence is unwatchable too.

AHHAHAHAHA Matthew Broderick's "glory days". I get it! He was in a movie called "Glory"! And it was probably his only one that will be taken seriously!

:lol

It's hard to say, but I'm tied betwen three movies.

Star Wars Episode II: Just becuase it's so damn droll and uneventful tot he point where even Yoda doing the ligthsaber gig seems boring and geriatric (Then again, it's a 900-year old muppet and Christopher Lee one-on-one so I guess that makes sense).

Miami Vice: I fell asleep for the first time at the movies thanks to this crock. What was the point of the white guy even being there? All he did was stand there with his mustache and hair and just......stand there.

Five Fingers of Steel: Horrible Kung-fu film featuring Hwang Jang Lee as a good guy who dropkicks trees (Not to mention the only character int he entire movie to have a name)

I forgot about Miami Vice. That movie was pretty horrible. The main girl wasn't even hot!

Thirding Miami Vice.

Only movie I ever walked out of.

I would say Eragon and Date Movie would be the worst, and Darkness follows closely behind them.
I think Pearl Harbour may top all of them though, now that I think of all the shitty movies my former roommate subjected me too.

Date Movie is definitely awful. It came on TV and I had to turn it off after about 15 minutes. But the same can be said for most spoof movies these days (such as the "Scary Movie" series). They just don't know how to do good parody flicks like they used to. I'll take a flick like "Hot Shots: Part Deux" or "Loaded Weapon" over "Scary Movie" any day of the week.

I agree completely, I'd take 'Spaceballs 2: The Search For More Money' over whatever crappy new spoof they have coming out. It's pretty sad that the "2 of the 6 makers of Scary Movie" are trying to mimic the Wayons' brothers "hilarious" style of comedy, but at least it keeps Carmen Electra and Lil Jon employed.

Oh yeah, Eragon also sucked ass :<

I went to see it with a friend of mine, just for the fun and to get few laughs. We were dead wrong.

But I can't understand you guys for walking out of the theaters. Seriously, if I pay 8€ for the ticket I won't walk out nomatter how much the movie sucks.

Agreed 100%. Black Knight, What's the Worst That Can Happen, Big Momma House 2, National Security, they are all terrible.

Anyway here's my list:

Master of Disguise:x
I also second Nacho Libre
Cheaper by the Dozen [The one with Steve Martin]
See Spot Run
Nora's Hair Salon
I Am Legend
Micheal
Who's Harry Crumb?
Alien vs. Predator
Barnyard

ok, ok. umm.. how about How High? Norbit? Any of the horrible family movies starring Ice Cube (he used to be cool, too:()? I swear, I'm not racist.

besides, you're just calling me out because of the ted kennedy remark. awake did suck though. hard. and not JUST because I got busted trying to nail a fat chick.

Beloved. If you by this DVD, the case is actually just stuffed with shit. Which is still better than getting an actual DVD of the film.

Fathom Zero's "Christmas is Cancelled" (jj).

Haha, that is a horrible movie. :lol

Ooooooh man. The movie that I really and truly violently hated the most and wished death upon as I walked out of the theater was Pan's Labyrinth. Yeah yeah, a lot of people loved that movie, and the fantasy bits of it were gorgeous. But the fact is that I shouldn't sob for 20 minutes at the end of a bloody fantasy movie. Fie upon you, unexpected drama!
My only other movie I can think of because I actually DID walk (drive?) out of it was that Exorcist prequel movie. I watched in at a drive-in as part of a 3-movie deal showing on Halloween; I was able to sit through AvP and left 30 minutes into the Exorcist thing. Man, it was bad.

I'm going to say that the worst movie ever is called Perfume. It's a story about a man born with an acute sense of smell. His smell was so strong that he could smell everything around him with the utmost vividness! The smells of fish and guts where he was born made him cry out his first tears which condemned his mother to death! His smels guided him through life like a brain and eyeballs would guide anyone else! He was like a dog, with that sense of smell of his. He would be rapturuous from smelling all the smells of this smelly world with that special, special nose of his!
Surely a man of such stature was destined to smell great things! One day his sense of smell lead him to smelling a perfume shop which had women trying on smelly perfumes! Afterwards, he followed a woman down the street like a hunting dog because he could smell he! He snuck sniffs of her neck and she saw him and freaked out about his nose being in her ear and started screaming so he killed her!

That's the first 20 minutes of the movie almost VERBATIM! also his sense of smell leads him to killing someone :O :O :O i stopped watching after 20 minutes though because watching a movie in which every scene is about somebody's fucking nose sucks.

I hate black people movies, too

okay...
 

Worst movies i know: Are you scared (a very cheap Saw wannabe), Evil Aliens, Alien 4, Alien Vs Predator, Elm Street 6, Abandon, Wing commander, Ghostrider, Final Fantasy VII: Advent children, Mr. Bean's holiday, Sairen (Japanese, based on the video game Siren)... :hypno

I almost want to second "Ghost Rider" but, it wasn't "most horrible movie i've ever seen". Disappointing, yes. But it didn't fill me wit total hatred for the human race like "Coyote Ugly" did so many years ago, and "Nacho Libre" recently.

I borrowed Ghost Rider from the local library and paid 50 cents. Same with Nacho Libre. The difference is with Ghost Rider, i thought "Well, I only paid 50 cents". With "Nacho Libre" I wanted that 50 cents back.

Any films which have "black people are different from white people LOL" as their major premise are guaranteed to fail.

Here's another monumental trainwreck. The Pink Panther re-make. Beyonce shows the acting ability of a statuette in the film. She hardly talks or moves, which gives the mindset that standing around and looking sexy equates to acting. Plus the movie generally sucks except for the two sex gags between Steve Martin and the nerdy chick.

As for the person who suffered in drive-in night, I remember going with friends and sitting through The Day After Tomorrow and Garfield while Shrek 2 and some Harry Potter flick was on the other screen. Comparing this to the last time I went to said drive-in and saw Pirate of the Caribbean and Finding Nemo. That shit was like a double whammy.

Oh no...
 

Here's one: the American version of Godzilla. Matthew Broderick ruins every single goddamn movie he's in. Only thing good about this movie was Jean Reno. Don't ask me why i like him. (Leon?)

You like Jean Reno because he had a love affair with Natalie Portman and you didn't.

Oh yes...
 

Yeah, Reno saved me from that bitch. One day the doorbell rang and by the time i got to open the door, i saw Jean Reno carrying screaming Portman into he's car and taking her away... :hypno

Also, the Rush Hour movies and anything with Chris Tucker.

I forgot to mention "Christmas Vacation 2". This movie was built on a mountain of tears.

Oh jesus christ...
 

Every goddamn Christian movie :blowme. Every movie with rappers directing, producing and acting. Finnish film-industry blows. The American Grudge 2 is fucking terrible. First one was okay though...

But the Ten Commandments had Charles Heston and Vincent Price in it......

Ultraviolet... what a load of crap! Me and my friend both just got up and left. Ugghh.... thinking of it still gives me the willies!

Micheal Clayton..i actually fell asleep in the theater!!

That made me laugh quite hard :lol

My pick for worst movie was High Crimes. When an ending of a movie makes me realize I wasted two hours of my life, I tend to be angry. A twist just for the sake of having a twist is not always a good thing.

EDIT: Honorable mention goes to Astronauts Wife. That movie was so bad I used it as a basis of comparison for all other bad movies i saw after it.

What's wrong with Michael Clayton?

The Prince of Egypt wasn't really a bad movie.

Oh yeah, Bringing Down The House was horrible. I lost respect for Queen Latifah after seeing that.

Whatever the film was like, I couldn't get past the drawing style. Every character looked the fucking same. What's even more galling is that every film those people put out had the exact same face for every character.

Gingerdead Man or Zombie Nation

you had respect for queen latifah?

"House of the Dead", "Epic Movie" Especially epic movie sucks **BALLZ OF STEEL**

Yeah, I think that's a genuine first. Was it her wonderful guest appearance on the fresh prince in '93 that made you a fan initially?

I still think that the scary movies, epic movie, date movie, meet the spartans and whatever shitty follow ups they'll have are in a league of their own as far as bad movies go. They are really just all so terrible.

A League of Their Own

Good call. A lot of those movies on stations like WE and Lifetime just piss me off, also. Chick flicks?! More like SHIT flicks!

I now refuse to watch anything that has Hugh Grant in it. He is the only actor that makes me want to vomit decomposing animal intestines rather than watch his soppy crappy idea of a movie

Also anything that ends with ***** Movie

The Skydivers. Thank god it was a MST3K episode, because if it wasn't, i would've killed myself. Nothing in that movie made any sense and the characters would've had more character in them even if steven hawking played every single one of them.

It should be in the movies you're embarrassed to like thread, but I genuinely enjoy "about a boy". It's funny and it's a good story. Also, I'm kind of a sap sometimes.

I agree, About A Boy is the only Hugh Grant movie I can stomach.

really, about the squid and the whale? i enjoyed it quite a bit

but i have to second spiderman 3. probably the biggest disappointment ever

Episode II

The worst movieI've ever seen was Zombie Nation.(no not the band) The movies "zombies" were chicks with black paint around their eyes and they didn't need to eat people because at the end some chick tells them they can just eat regular food.

For me About a Boy was ruined when i saw the British "Teen" Sitcom Skins
The little kid in that movie in the "sitcom" is a man whore
Im ashamed i even watched it

I got yet another one. Rat Race. Don't get me wrong, the movie itself is not bad, but the ending is the grandest definition of "cop-out", which ruins the movie completely.

I second that

I saw it in the movies and i was appalled at the ending of it