Cum spray. Is that the new thing the kids are saying these days?

apple is the best company in the world! acquired $1,000+ worth of damage on your macbook with no warranty? no problem. have a new one. we'll ship it to you overnight. have a nice day!


plus the genius was very cute <3 :D

they don't deserve the awful reputation they have :(

In NYC schools that behavior would be considered normal.

And Foxcon employees kill themselves when they fail apple.

They have a bad reputation for a reason. In another couple of months you will remember why, but then they will show you the same product with an add on that was invented before said product was made and you will ohh and ahh about it.

I don't mind these business tactics, I just hate it when they act like the fat kid who gets bullied by big bad Microsoft. Fucking pussies.

Nintendo is the same way.

But I had a problem with my HP laptop not turning on at all when it was only two months old, and I had to JUMP THROUGH HOOPS to get it fixed without charge. I was declined a brand new one.

They could make it so it isn't designed to break in the fucking first place.

that would mean lowering their 2000% markup

$320 chocolate easter bunny. 35 lbs.

Oh wow! :love Anthony Thomas?

..

Secret hate notes in spoiler tag code makes me feel like I am getting all my hate out, yet not ruining the thread.

esther price.

Way to tell everyone the secret. :eek

when I think of someone who knows the secret of not ruining threads, I think of Pub.

It is true. I only ruin thread. I keep my trash in one place. I am a hoarder of my bullshit. :eek

Agreed.

She was way hotter as a trampy raver. :tear

I feel like there needs to be tits in here.

Some spambots tits for dicks sake.

: lol awesome

Ladies

:pagebrak

i love me some ladies

I LOVE PUSSY

I want some tang mang.

After the whole thing last week with everyone I loved throwing an early surprise party for my friend with the same birthday as me, I decided to round everyone up and go to an arcade 30 minutes away and then get drinks for my birthday party.

Long story short, I spent all day drawing, eating, waiting for tomorrow so I can go to work.
So basically I need new friends.
How is a 23 year old supposed to meet people when he's not in college? >:

On the bright side, got a lot of work done today. So that felt good. Caught up on my podcasts. That was nice. Mark Maron's podcast is really great if you like comedians and want to hear them talk about being comedians.

No one showed up?

I would have showed up. for the drinks and fucking skeeball for damn sure.

Either they didn't want to go or they didn't get back to me, which means they didn't want to go, which means I officially have no friends :rock
Or everyone I know sucks. Which is entirely possible, though as the saying goes, if you can't tell who is the sucker during a game of poker, you're the sucker. Or something like that.

:wank

Yeah, I'd totally do those Svedka robots.

guitar woman. Where are your tits in that picture?

They are just jealous of your girlish figure.

I only now noticed the thread title so I'm sorry if this incredibly witty and topical image has been posted already. And sorry for this little bit of text that is ruining if it hasn't. Ans sorry for mentioning the thread title in order to set up an image joke that isn't worth it.

That i-mock ladiez pic needs more Terra w/ beard

Sheeit, that sucks. In fact; I'm so sorry to hear that, I'm not going to be facetious or dickish.

Still waiting for those gee dubya tats

I'm actually going to be the idiot internet sympathizer here. I sincerely hope that you get very, very drunk with friends, and get over this shit quickly

Huh
Did I promise tattoos again


Hang on, what was it? I'll be near a scanner on monday

dude, just look at it the way I do: yes apple releases on trashed cycles. and yeah, they do have the incredibly annoying/stereotypical fanbase that everyone makes fun of -- they are dense, gullible, and willing to buy anything branded, but they're also eternally loyal and they're devoted life-long fans. they feel they have earned this grandiose sense of entitlement just because they've given such an absurd amount of money to the company. so they expect top priority on waiting lists, the best service, the fastest response times, help whenever they want it and continuous smiles.

their douchebaggery is awesome for the rest of us, because apple automatically assumes that everyone in their userbase is one of these creatures. they can't treat any of us badly or let us walk away upset -- because then there's a chance that they'll be losing the devoted life-long customer. they'll go out of their way to make everyone happy just incase. they don't mind taking a 1k loss on a clusmy teenager, because they expect the clumsy teenager will turn around and spend 2k every 6 months, on new computers, phones, ipods, ipads, etc.


with a company like HP, there's is no such thing as fandom. they never expect customers to offer devoted support or long term benefit. the only priority they have is to sell products. once milhouse has already purchased this product, it no longer matters if they piss him off or not. with that flexibility, they'll just continue to try and get as much money off of him as they possibly can, while they still have him. they'll fight him on every last dime, fee, shipment payment, phone call, maintenance session, service renewal, etc. I bet they'll even put him on hold for thirty minutes and make him listen to greenday just so he's less likely to call the complimentary support in the future.

I would rather be with the company that pretends I have value and treats me awesomely, than the one that just treats me like shit.

(as long as you're not the type to get caught up in the kind of cyclic/trendy/ritualistic buying, it should be worth it. just leave the android in the car, buy the computer and prepare to take advantage of fandom. it's like getting all of the union benefits without ever having to pay the membership fees!)

maybe try participating in specific activities you enjoy and meeting others that are doing the same? I dunno. it seems friendships that develop from common interests > friends that come from convenience. in college everybody automatically buddies up to neighbors, roommates, friends of friends, classmates, etc. and that's silly, because you end up with a group of randomly mix-matched people that would probably hate eachother after a day or two of sobriety. you should go to the arcade anyway and buy drinks for the other dudes that actually want to be there. great way to make friends I bet!

edit: I am talking too much >:

and you forgot wiffles tadao! :(

I think it both hot and amusing that Miss Elx has a better grasp of the hot ladies of the forum than the so called pervy chaps do. :eek

My girlfriend has a friend who is single.

Never going to happen, pretty face. :love

I totallu have a pair of sexy chaps too.

I know you do, but would you please cover them up with some underpants for once. :eek

Never

I'm kidding, of course. Please post pictures of your balls, Bill. :eek

That thread makes me feel sick. I hate sex so much. :willie

Oh Christ. :(

She needs to get back here and post a pic. :(

:wank

I was going to post a picture of my dong but blacked out......down to the pixel.

Nothing is stopping you, hotstuff. :eek

Sorry GW I just can't read all that with any interest. :\

This is better. Phoenix: I've only got a few friends from school that I actually like, the rest are just acquaintances that I happen to know, and seem to end up at their birthday parties despite not actually liking them. A few months ago I started training to be a referee for the local roller derby team, and the friends I have made there are people that are as old as, or older, than me, (so it's not too late to make friends) like what I like, and are ten times more entertaining than the people I used to hang out with. It's never too late to make good friends. Elx's turn up to the arcade and make friends idea sounds like a good one to me, unless you are a total creep about it.

Woops; I was meant to put :lol on that last quote.

I read it with interest. :eek
I do everything in the manner of a total creep. :eek

That seems reverse logic to me. Tattoos don't wash off. :eek

I was served with a summons today! Yay!

THIS IS FOR THE BRITISH PEOPLE

Mr Kitsa walked in as I was watching the "Bonfire Day" episode of Mulberry and wondered why the British would burn Guy Richie in effigy once a year.

:lol

I bought 8 hits of acid today.

God yes, I've been waiting for this since I was 12.

Snatch.

The problem is that he likes her and he took any opportunity to be close to her. Even an idiotic, slutty, heart-breaking one. :(

So. To recap, she's occupying the male status in the relationship.

I disagree with your gender-stereotyping but yeah, he is the bitch.

Seeing as I don't factor in the billboard photo, you'd best change the title from "Ladies of I-Mockery" to "Ladies of I-Mockery I'd Have Relations With".

Or "Ladies of I-Mockery That Sound Like They're Single"

Your red hair still has a special place in my heart, Kitsa.

You tell me off every time I suggest I have an interest in boffing you. :(

Working in retail, I have learned of one of the most dreaded types of customers: The last minute shopper. These are the assholes with the uncanny ability to show up mere moments before you leave, equipped with a long list, and extremely indecisive mindset.
Also, this specific example consisted of a fat 26-30 year old guy, and his girlfriend/wife/whatever who appeared to be 40 or so. :(

Also, we got some new guy who transferred over from Dallas. He's worked in Randall's delis for two or three years, while he studied History at UNT. Then promptly moved here and... still works at Randalls. Two of his more unique moments:
Me: "Do you like the internet at all? Any cool sites?"
Him: "I just use it for porn." *Looks at me with his usual dead-inside look, then walks back to the sink*

And then today: "I don't really care if I get dirty at work. This is actually one of my cleaner days."
He was covered in crusted foodstuffs and grease.

HE'S SINGLE, LADIES

Going to need some snap shots to confirm this.

CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!
SCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!

:pagebrak

Oh nman, that makes me want to repost my true-story JEREMY THE DISHWASHER MS Paint comics again. Pub, you didn't happen to save those in a folder or anything, did you

'Course, I love fat girls, so I keep tapping that same stupid shit myself :x JUST DO AS I SAY

Not that I can find. :(

THANK GAWD FOR PHOTOBUCKET

Right-click, Save as...

I'm tempted to make a thread consisting entirely of selections from my photobucket account

Fortunately, Drew here hasn't gotten to this level yet. He is rather unsettling, though. He's one of those guys that never has any emotion in his face or voice, ever. God forbid anyone ever gets the idea he was ever happy at any point in his life. I think he subconsciously tries to make up for this by making inappropriate attempts at humor, such as when I came back from break and we had this little exchange:
Me: "Did I miss anything while I was gone?"
Drew: "We had an orgy with a bunch of girls. It was cool."
At this point, he continued his routine 'Stare at you with no visible change in any way. Possibly into your soul.'
More unsettling is that he apparently has a crush on the tiny, tiny teenage girl who works in the bakery across from us. This worries me greatly, not only because she's often the only person nearby that keeps me from going postal, but that any advance from him to her would probably end up with a physical manifestation of pure workplace awkwardness, aimed directly at me, because I think he thinks I'm his friend now.

FUck bra

I totally did the photobucket thread, and it was just as hilarious as I'd imagined, but I-Mockery logged me out when I tried to post it. IT'S NOT TO BE

Boo. :(

The photos of me as a long-haired little twerp were hilarious

hang on

THE EVOLUTION OF THE GRISLY GUS

SO HANDSOME.

LIKE RONGI.

I love that apparently my hair was PERFECT for Locks for Love, but I will NEVER, EVER do long hair again, shit's gross

Some cancer kid got quality fucking shit, I'll tell you that much

I've lately started freaking out and becoming intensely uncomfortable the instant I realize that my hair has grown just past the point that I think I need a haircut. At this point, I'm inconsolable; even my girlfriend's insistence that longer hair looks 'Cuter on you', I almost rabidly insist on getting a haircut. This is made even worse by my indecisiveness on how I should get my hair cut, to the point where I tell whoever is cutting my hair to 'Please use your judgement. I'm scared and confused about my hair and how to style it.'

So far it's actually worked fairly well.

SAM DID YOU GET THAT MUDDER FECKING TATTOO PIC

Long hair after showering is the least comfortable thing.

My edit button's been stolen.

I don't think you fags realize how crippling that is.

With great power comes great responsibility

Damnit, show up and CONVERSE.

I HATE ADOBE ILLUSTRATOR

AND OTHER THINGS


NO ONE IS HERE TO COMMISERATE

I have never used Illustrator.

Now, I doubt I ever will.

Thanks!

Stupid bastard of a program just curbstomped me, after I spent an hour laboriously fixing a problem