I GOT SKILLZ
 

The other day, this BITCHIFUCKED was all "you're good in bed" and I was like "LOL I KNOW," but it occured to me that I was shitfaced when I boned her and I only vaguely remember the porn star moves I was pulling. I do remember the always effective THRUST IT ALL THE WAY IN AND KINDA WITHDRAW JUST A BIT, JUST TO LET HER KNOW HOW GIANT YER CAWK IS thing.

So, DISCUSS YOUR FAVORITE MOVES! I think this has the potential to be the most graphic loveline thread yet!

PEOPLE WHO HAVE ONLY HAD ONE PARTNER (SAM) OR NO PARTNER (MILHOUSE) NEED NOT APPLY.

Anything that leaves bruises, bite-marks and scratches.

I like to get him on all fours and pull him by the hair into my cock. Works well on girls too.

Seasawing works

The scorpion deathlock.

That's your answer to everything.

my favorite move is cu*ming too quick and then going to sleep.

They love that shi*.

Passing out on top is a Pro-Move.

One time a girl passed out under me when I was gettin after it on top.

I guess my love makin was so good that it made her go unconscious

if a girl calls you "daddy" does that mean it is working :eek

OR SHE IS RELIVING A REPRESSED MEMORY. :(

One time I passed out on top of a girl right before I was about to give her the peace pipe. When I woke up she was sleeping on the floor and Abyss was playing on DVD. :(

That's no way to talk about your mother.

I was going down on a girl who fell asleep. I woke her up and she was like "Wha happen?"

I told her I sung a lullaby right into her vagina.

I was just telling someone how I like to wake girls up with my dick already in them. Yeah it's rape, but it's sexy rape.

My kind of alarm.

Rape.

Rimming. Probably the most serendipitous of all sex acts because there's no particular "end" in mind, just free 'n' easy play and exploration. It can of course be combined with a hand job (rusty trombone), but I personally leave that matter up to the recipient. Tongue-fucking is commonly referred to as "The Devil's Gambit" due to the possibility of finding a soft brown finger poking back ala ET, the extra-terrestrial (from which the act's other appellation, the "elliot" is derived.)

PROTIP: Tracing the line of the "taint" (dogball, grundle) one finds at its terminus a small "anal clit," commonly referred to as a "Roger Corman" ("Corman" for short). This small protrusion should be given an intense seeing-to, subject to licking, sucking, and even biting.

I fulfilled a rape fantasy by request for two seperate girls. Cock slapping their face seems very exciting to them in these situations.

I just learned a new sex move. The roller coaster!

"to have sex with a girl from behind while her head is facing down towards the bottom of the stairs, you then proceed to punch her in the head and ride her all the way down to the bottom of said stairs. "

gah, you might break your dick :x

Stick some cardboard or a sled underneath her.

I wouldn't mind doing that on a crocodile mile. Show her the splash down pool....with my cock.

Autofellatio. :(

I wanna piss on a girl some time :(. Not to get off on it, but if it's a girl I really hate or something but still manage to get in the sack, I wanna pee on her.