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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 04:04 AM


hot Kukuro Dec 1st, 2010 04:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 705866)
Yes. Hot, right? :orgasm


[picture of publover in his underpants]


wait a minute - is it you, or the zero? or are you REALLY Ms. Palin??

Zhukov Dec 1st, 2010 04:32 AM

I'm not posting in this thread anymore if that keeps popping up.

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 04:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 705792)

Quote:

Originally Posted by hot Kukuro (Post 705799)
...the same as when you try to express your disdain by posting pictures of little boy knuckles.

Yay for little boy knuckles rubbing my thirty year old dick (pics on demand).

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 04:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hot Kukuro (Post 705869)
wait a minute - is it you, or the zero? or are you REALLY Ms. Palin??

I wish I was Ms. Palin offering you pics of her dick. God, that is hot. :yum

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 04:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 705870)
I'm not posting in this thread anymore if that keeps popping up.

Kitsa! Look what you have done! You have offended the Tasmanian ambassador! :eek

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 04:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 705800)
Poor pub and his little boy knuckles. WAY TO MAKE FRIENDS THERE JERK FACE!

I can think of a way that I'd forgive him. :orgasm :yum :eek

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 05:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hot Kukuro (Post 705829)
It's a Christmas miracle!

Maybe baby knuckles will follow your example.

You're licking the wrong tentpole if you think I'll be stopping posting anytime soon, Silly McCannotRead.

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 05:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hot Kukuro (Post 705810)
idk who Hunter S. Thompson is

"Let us toast to animal pleasures, to escapism, to rain on the roof and instant coffee, to unemployment insurance and library cards, to absinthe and good-hearted landlords, to music and warm bodies and contraceptives…and to the “good life”, whatever it is and wherever it happens to be." - Hunter S. Thompson

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 05:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 705811)
Hunter S. Thompson used to post here

His contribution is the pride and joy of my I-Mockery Penis Folder. ;)

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 05:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MLE (Post 705847)
I like how the approach of letting someone ramble on and on until they realize what they're saying typically turns out the best. I use this when people call into Comcast and eventually they mention the exact reason why their service isn't working or why they have a $600 bill.

OH THOSE PORN MOVIES COST THAT MUCH? EACH TIME??

Quote:

Originally Posted by hot Kukuro (Post 705850)
Cool. Then maybe you can answer my initial ?

..

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 05:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MLE (Post 705847)
I like how the approach of letting someone ramble on and on until they realize what they're saying typically turns out the best.

Quote:

Originally Posted by hot Kukuro (Post 705850)
Cool. Then maybe you can answer my initial ?

:|

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 05:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MLE (Post 705847)
:|

Quote:

Originally Posted by hot Kukuro (Post 705850)
Cool. Then maybe you can answer my initial ?

:confused

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 05:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MLE (Post 705847)
:lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by hot Kukuro (Post 705850)
:confused

..

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 05:12 AM

:picklehat

kahljorn Dec 1st, 2010 05:14 AM

that was a sampler penis ;/

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 05:21 AM

It was very enticing. Everyone here should drop the 2 C-notes to see more of your 12-inches.

hot Kukuro Dec 1st, 2010 05:25 AM

ok, i totally got none of that

Chojin Dec 1st, 2010 05:28 AM

PS3 died today after I was already having a shitty day/week/month. I feel like I should be angry, but I simply don't have any emotion left to spend it on hardware.

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 05:39 AM

At least you're fit & sexy, Mister Y. :love

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 05:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hot Kukuro (Post 705885)
ok, i totally got none of that

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 705723)

..

hot Kukuro Dec 1st, 2010 05:53 AM

well that sure as hell wasn't sexy : (

Kitsa Dec 1st, 2010 07:29 AM

I didn't offend the Tasmanian ambassador. I provided material with which you offended the Tasmanian ambassador. Creative commons and whatnot.

Zhukov Dec 1st, 2010 08:39 AM

I'm filing a complaint at the embassy. Mark my words.

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 08:54 AM

I wish I had the self-control to stop offending him. :eek

Pub Lover Dec 1st, 2010 08:55 AM


Zhukov Dec 1st, 2010 08:58 AM

So I'm applying for a government job in immigration, and the application process is grueling.

Describe a situation that demonstrates your ability to work alongside colleagues who may hold differing and diverse cultural beliefs and/or personal values.

In your answer, please ensure you address the following:
What was the situation and what was your role?
Who were the colleagues you were working with?
In what way did their beliefs and/or values differ?
How did you ensure that you were able to create a positive working relationship with each of your colleagues?


Who were the colleagues? Do they really need to know? Are they going to check up on them? Basically they want me to say that 'despite John being a Nazi, I was able to put that behind us and really get stuck into the portfolios that needed doing'.


Provide an example that demonstrates your ability to contribute to a good outcome by developing practical solutions to problems.

Provide an example that demonstrates your ability to contribute to a good outcome by developing practical solutions to problems. A different example this time.

Provide yet another example that demonstrates your ability to contribute to a good outcome by developing practical solutions to problems. You had better not be making these up.

Kitsa Dec 1st, 2010 09:02 AM

what was your practical solution for that huntsman spider on the greenery you were showing us earlier?

Zhukov Dec 1st, 2010 09:36 AM

The last time I was attacked by a spider was a few days ago when I was getting out of the shower. After I came too, I decided that the practical solution to encountering a spider of any kind is to deal death to it in the quickest time possible. Using my skill with a cricket bat, I parried it's clumsy advances and countered back with deft strokes, incapacitating it in a short time, and then finishing it off within the next few minutes. This was a good outcome since I was alive and it was dead, unable to breed and create potentially hundreds more spiders.

Kitsa Dec 1st, 2010 09:41 AM

I would definitely use that anecdote on the application.

I'm redheaded and part Jewish. You know me, does that help you?

Zhukov Dec 1st, 2010 09:45 AM

I am only allowed to put people in a work related supervisory role as referees! I had to change my resume to not include all my friends.

Fathom Zero Dec 1st, 2010 11:10 AM

I love you Zhukov.

Esuohlim Dec 1st, 2010 11:48 AM

Man, opening up the page to FZ nipples in a public place ain't cool :(

hot Kukuro Dec 1st, 2010 12:00 PM

i dunno if potential employers know you enjoy spending your free time on i-mockery. Woah, the state of the world

kahljorn Dec 1st, 2010 07:42 PM

Quote:

It was very enticing. Everyone here should drop the 2 C-notes to see more of your 12-inches.
Agreed. It would be a picture for everybody anyway

Phoenix Gamma Dec 1st, 2010 08:52 PM

HEY GUYS ON A SCALE OF ONE TO GAY HOW LAME IS IT TO ASK SOMEONE OUT TO DINNER ON FACEBOOK CHAT?

This chick was all "oh here's my number! Take it and call me and we'll go out sometime" but then was all "oh but I lost my phone so just hit me up on facebook". I'm pretty sure that was so I don't call her though :(
edit: she said "yes" so I guess it was probably only a "9 out of gay".

Fathom Zero Dec 1st, 2010 09:10 PM

It's just the new thing. I've made dates like dat, yo.

Sam Dec 1st, 2010 09:15 PM

IF IT'S A DATE WITH A LADY IT'S NOT GAY AT ALL.

AS LONG AS YOU GET BALLS DEEP IN IT.

Fathom Zero Dec 1st, 2010 09:22 PM

get all up in that shit like crabs

Phoenix Gamma Dec 1st, 2010 10:55 PM

"balls deep"..."with a lady"..."not gay at all"..."crabs"...gotcha. Thanks guys!!! :):):):)

She told me she's getting her phone that day so she's gonna call me when she gets it so I can pick her up. But she told me to text her my number even though she lost her phone.

I'm probably gonna be alone on Friday. NOW I'LL NEVER GET BALLS DEEP IN CRABS. :(:(:(:(:(:(

Sam Dec 2nd, 2010 12:11 AM

I JUST HOPE YOU GET TO TICKLE SOME MINGE.

Fathom Zero Dec 2nd, 2010 12:25 AM



Play her some Soul Coughing. The ladies'll think you're deep or something.

executioneer Dec 2nd, 2010 03:18 AM

did you guys know, there is ONE COOKIE SLOT left

unless you want to FORCE sam or tadao to take it, the poor devils

Phoenix Gamma Dec 2nd, 2010 03:20 AM

EXCUSE ME I DIDN'T GET A DEGREE IN FINE ART AND GRAPHIC DESIGN FOR NOTHING. I'M ALREADY PRETTY MUCH DEEPER AND SMARTER THAN EVERYONE.

In retrospect, she probably isn't my type. Her listed religious view is "Kim Kardashian"...

Tadao Dec 2nd, 2010 03:28 AM

Dude, maybe she has a big Kardashian ass. Look for the good things in a woman, or be lonely. W/E

Esuohlim Dec 2nd, 2010 12:14 PM

Pumpkin pie for breakfast, fuck yeah

Esuohlim Dec 2nd, 2010 12:14 PM

Breakfast at 12:15pm, fuck yeah

Esuohlim Dec 2nd, 2010 12:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phoenix Gamma (Post 706059)
In retrospect, she probably isn't my type. Her listed religious view is "Kim Kardashian"...

MAEBY SHE LIKES VIDEO GAMS :(

Fathom Zero Dec 2nd, 2010 12:22 PM

I made fried rice at nine.



Goth fried rice.

Ex Leper Dec 2nd, 2010 02:37 PM

Has anyone here had their wisdom teeth taken out? I'm having all four taken out on Monday.

Fathom Zero Dec 2nd, 2010 02:49 PM

Mine haven't affected the rest of my mouth, so I haven't needed to. Yet.

Pub Lover Dec 2nd, 2010 02:54 PM

:pagedylan

Pub Lover Dec 2nd, 2010 02:54 PM

I forgot about that. Bugger. :peeved

Tadao Dec 2nd, 2010 03:04 PM

:lol What loser is trying to get into my newgrounds account?

Esuohlim Dec 2nd, 2010 03:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ex Leper (Post 706132)
Has anyone here had their wisdom teeth taken out? I'm having all four taken out on Monday.

NO SIR NOT YET

BUT I HEAR IT'S AWFUL

AND YOU CAN'T SUCK DICKS FOR THREE WEEKS :tear

10,000 Volt Ghost Dec 2nd, 2010 03:19 PM

I need to have my wisdom teeth taken out but I'm having a kid instead. I have 7 wisdom teeth.

Dimnos Dec 2nd, 2010 03:46 PM

I had mine taken out years ago. They pumped me full of demerol and I had a great time.

Pub Lover Dec 2nd, 2010 04:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 706142)
:lol What loser is trying to get into my newgrounds account?

I heard that is where you stored your cock pictures. :yum

Tadao Dec 2nd, 2010 04:34 PM

Close, it was a virtual reality game where you get to see what it's like to put your mouth around my cock.

MarioRPG Dec 2nd, 2010 04:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 706149)
I need to have my wisdom teeth taken out but I'm having a kid instead. I have 7 wisdom teeth.

I've never heard children being referred to as a pain killer... usually a headache-maker.

Pentegarn Dec 2nd, 2010 05:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by My Email
FINAL NOTIFICATION

YOUR EMAIL ID HAS WON (€150,000.00 Euros) in casino International Email sweepstakes award in the first category with lucky numbers 5/14/21/49 and Ref:ES/9428V0/92.

For Clarification and procedure Contact:

Mr. Luis Catado.
Tel:edited
Email: edited

With your Full names,Address,Age,Occupation,Phone/ numbers,

Congratulation.
(Mrs.)Miguel Mir.
Public Relations Office.

Now I am rich at last. But what to spend the money on....

Tadao Dec 2nd, 2010 05:07 PM

Euros are about as useful as confederate money.

Pentegarn Dec 2nd, 2010 05:16 PM

:lol

Tanuki Dec 2nd, 2010 07:09 PM

I got another turkish e-mail from Badoo. I am confused. :(

The Leader Dec 2nd, 2010 07:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ex Leper (Post 706132)
Has anyone here had their wisdom teeth taken out? I'm having all four taken out on Monday.

I have. I could eat fine the day after and everything was wonderful.

MLE Dec 2nd, 2010 11:35 PM

I have and I was in terrible pain for a month.

Kitsa Dec 2nd, 2010 11:39 PM

I still have all my wisdom teeth, but I had both lower 12-year molars removed because they were so radiation-kerfuckered. I had a valium-versed drip and I don't remember a damned thing. They put the IV in and it was like one blink of an eye later and I was being escorted out the special woozy-patient door. Seriously, the procedure part was a total blank. I was so thrilled with this that I sent the office a gift basket.

I don't remember any especial pain but trying to remember to not drink out of a straw was kind of a pain in the ass.

executioneer Dec 3rd, 2010 12:22 AM

i got my lower wisdom teeth still

going in for a root canal monday, though

although i hear it's not as bad as it's rumored to be anymore

Wiffles Dec 3rd, 2010 07:21 AM

Wisdom teeth are the work of the devil! Get it? Evolution = devil! XP

Ex Leper Dec 3rd, 2010 11:07 AM

The doctor I went to said that the surgery would only be an hour.

replicant Dec 3rd, 2010 12:34 PM

I had my wisdom teeth out all at the same time. I opted for general anesthesia. I didn't want to be awake for the process. It was painful when the numbing agent wore off. I didn't get any heavy duty pain killers. I had my surgery done in a dental school because I didn't have dental insurance. They only let the professors operate so no problems there. However, the Tylenol prescribed was not enough to ease the pain. I was taking lots of Tylenol and popping penicillin plus using ice packs off and on. Applesauce was my best friend.

The pain was bad in the first few days then eased up. About a week to get over it all. Thankfully I didn't haven't complications like a dry socket.

The most common complication is a dry socket.

(EDITED) Description/Explanation taken from Colgate's website: A dry socket occurs when a blood clot doesn’t form in the hole or the blood clot prematurely breaks off or breaks down. In a dry socket, the underlying bone is exposed to air and food. This can be very painful and can cause a bad odor or taste. A dry socket needs to be treated with a medicated dressing to stop the pain and encourage the area to heal.

My husband got one of these. He was complaining of the pain for a while.

The Leader Dec 3rd, 2010 12:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by replicant (Post 706282)
The pain was bad in the first few days then eased up. About a week to get over it all. Thankfully I didn't haven't complications like a dry socket.

The most common complication is a dry socket.

A dry socket occurs when a blood clot doesn’t form in the hole or the blood clot prematurely breaks off or breaks down. In a dry socket, the underlying bone is exposed to air and food. This can be very painful and can cause a bad odor or taste. A dry socket needs to be treated with a medicated dressing to stop the pain and encourage the area to heal.

My husband got one of these. He was complaining of the pain for a while.

Do you write for wikipedia?

Dimnos Dec 3rd, 2010 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ex Leper (Post 706272)
The doctor I went to said that the surgery would only be an hour.

Sounds about right. Did he say what he would give you for the surgery?

Colonel Flagg Dec 3rd, 2010 01:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ex Leper (Post 706132)
Has anyone here had their wisdom teeth taken out? I'm having all four taken out on Monday.

Yes, many years ago, back when it was a 2 day hospital stay. All 4 at once. I didn't experience any major issues, and advances in anaesthesia should make it even less of a pain in the butt.

Luck to you.

Ex Leper Dec 3rd, 2010 01:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dimnos (Post 706293)
Sounds about right. Did he say what he would give you for the surgery?

I had my x-rays done about 3 weeks ago and I forgot what he said but I remember him running down a list of options. I'll definitely take whatever will make me the calmest and hopefully least painful. Hopefully the 4 day space between the surgery won't screw me up too bad to miss work that weekend.

Thanks for the well wishes everyone.

Dimnos Dec 3rd, 2010 02:29 PM

If dimerol is an option I would highly suggest you take it. When you wake up the next day you will want to do it again. :)

replicant Dec 3rd, 2010 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Leader (Post 706285)
Do you write for wikipedia?

Not really. I just was too lazy to edit the info I copied from Colgate's website to explain dry socket. It is good to know because they didn't even tell me about that complication. I learned of it because my hubby went through it.

MLE Dec 3rd, 2010 07:33 PM

I had it, too. Though I had two dry sockets at once.

Esuohlim Dec 3rd, 2010 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elx (Post 703968)
nasa is holding a conference tomorrow to tell us about some sort of exceptional discovery they have made! but it'll probably be something dumb :( why the secrecy!?

So wait, was the exceptional discovery the black hole or the arsenic life forms?

Because one was revealed three weeks later, but is WAY more exceptional >:

MLE Dec 3rd, 2010 10:00 PM

Not actually found like that. It was created.

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/12/03/sc...er=rss&emc=rss

Kitsa Dec 3rd, 2010 11:19 PM

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best...755781713.html

This may well be one of the most bizarre craigslist postings I've ever read, and that's saying something.

Phoenix Gamma Dec 4th, 2010 01:18 AM

My date stood me up! :)
I'm angry, yet relieved!

Then I learned that drinking alone isn't fun. So I went to Barnes and Nobel and worked on some sketches instead.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 706363)
http://www.craigslist.org/about/best...755781713.html

This may well be one of the most bizarre craigslist postings I've ever read, and that's saying something.

:lol
That's incredible. For some reason I didn't expect him to be an MJ impersonator. Boy do I feel silly.

10,000 Volt Ghost Dec 4th, 2010 09:01 AM

I google mapped how to get from China to Japan and it says to take a jet ski.

MarioRPG Dec 4th, 2010 10:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 706386)
I google mapped how to get from China to Japan and it says to take a jet ski.

I remember seeing this somewhere a while back... Also did my house to england or something and it was like "swim 2, 502 miles" or whatever. But that was a couple years back.

elx Dec 4th, 2010 10:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 706342)
So wait, was the exceptional discovery the black hole or the arsenic life forms?

Because one was revealed three weeks later, but is WAY more exceptional >:

MLE hinted this already (cant see her article), but this discovery isn't really all that exceptional - at least not in the manner it's being represented. there seems to be some sort of misconception going around that this microorganism is in someway alien, which it is not. the discovery also isn't of the organism itself, it's of what the organism is capable of doing. the idea behind the study was basically that the scientists could culture this bacteria, isolate it and manipulate it in order to prove a point. the point was that life could exist under conditions that are different than what we previously thought.

basically, we search for alien life by seeking out the conditions that we know can support life and we deduct the candidates that do not foster these conditions. so, by expanding the conditions we've also expanded our search. that was the only alien/space relation! i don't find it all that exciting personally, all we've done is broaden a search that was already huge to begin with. which isn't exactly getting us closer.

& back to the original point, this is just as disappointing as the other news release and the trend is getting annoying. NASA is purposefully irresponsible with adjectives in order to attract interest/attention.

10,000 Volt Ghost Dec 4th, 2010 10:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarioRPG (Post 706391)
I remember seeing this somewhere a while back... Also did my house to england or something and it was like "swim 2, 502 miles" or whatever. But that was a couple years back.


It wouldn't give me directions to anywhere in europe at all >:

It did give me intricate details about getting to New Zealand though including taking a Kayak from california to hawaii. Then kayaking again from hawaii to Japan.

Zhukov Dec 4th, 2010 11:02 AM

I didn't know what the fuck you were talking about for a while there. :lol

Pub Lover Dec 4th, 2010 11:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elx (Post 706394)
NASA is purposefully irresponsible with adjectives in order to attract interest/attention.

NASA is such a slut.

elx Dec 4th, 2010 04:10 PM

yes and i haven't even told you about those special favors they've been giving away in private in exchange for monetary funds :(

elx Dec 4th, 2010 04:11 PM

has anybody here besides sam changed their birth name?

Fathom Zero Dec 4th, 2010 04:37 PM

fuck unicorns

10,000 Volt Ghost Dec 4th, 2010 05:23 PM

I have.

Esuohlim Dec 4th, 2010 05:31 PM

SAM TEH GRAY FURBY

Pentegarn Dec 4th, 2010 05:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 706363)
http://www.craigslist.org/about/best...755781713.html

This may well be one of the most bizarre craigslist postings I've ever read, and that's saying something.

Look at this detail though

Quote:

Originally Posted by craigslist
Location: Philly

So Colonel, you gonna answer this?

Sam Dec 4th, 2010 07:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 706422)
SAM TEH GRAY FURBY

I WAS ONCE A HOT HOLIDAY ITEM, LIKE TICKLE ME ESUOHLIM AND MIGHTY MORPHIN TADAO RANGERS.

Colonel Flagg Dec 4th, 2010 08:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pentegarn (Post 706424)
So Colonel, you gonna answer this?

Let me think ... no.

Colonel Flagg Dec 4th, 2010 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 706405)
NASA is such a slut.

NASA is such a slut = Santa Claus sushi

Merry Christmas

captain516 Dec 4th, 2010 08:16 PM

Guise does the top banner look...off to anybody else?
[/IMG]

Fathom Zero Dec 4th, 2010 08:30 PM

lol

stevetothepast Dec 4th, 2010 08:41 PM

haha


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