Movie Reviewers:
Stop writing illiterate single paragraph reviews for extremely bad films and giving them 10/10 for no reason whatsoever.
NO Film is perfect. Not even Spinal Tap. That is all. >: |
I hear that.
|
not even to Alien: Ressurection? I mean, that movie had the BEST scene in movie history EVER (the ladder scene where Johnner hangs upside down, shooting at one of the Aliens and screaming: "Die you son of a bitch"!)
|
The reviews where the plot is like three lines and then people describe the movie in detail from front to end in the "review" section make me laugh.
Not to mention the negative LotR review by a guy calling himself "Wizard". |
MOVIE REVIEW REVIEWER.
Stop letting shitty reviews get posted. >: |
Sorry chimpy, they pass the bar. All it needs is two paragraphs. :(
|
Movie: "Best of Backyard Wrestling - Volume 1"
Year: 2000 Rated: Unrated Genre: Miscellaneous Director: dunno...whoever made it, I guess Writer: uh....there is no writer Reviewer: Angryhydralisk Plot: what do you think? It's about a bunch of dudes beating the shit out of each other. Review: There are two versions of the first tape: The original tape and the new version of the tape. The new version has chicks stripping and more footage. I have the original, so i am missing out. ok, onwards to the movie. It has 70 minutes of hardcore violence. This tape also has backyard bloopers and even a couple of teens beating each other up from a parking lot to their own school and ending with them fighting on a moving car. (It's called the epic battle if you are curious) This tape has a whole bunch of crazy stuff and is usually watched again and again...(Or until you get the other volumes) And you'll also notice one interesting thing. This tape HARDLY ever got complaints and offensive remarks. Look at the Girls Gone Wild Videos, they get sued all the time and they suck horse's ass! If you get it, it's worth it. Overall Rating: 10 |
I think we should just have assigned reviewers, and/or get rid of the 10 score from Overall Rating.
|
Heh. I like this one:
Movie: "Naked Killer" Year: who knows; who cares? Rated: R Genre: Action / Adventure Director: Writer: Reviewer: BobbyDan Plot: This movie is about a ring of east asian lesbian serial killers... It's not nearly as sexy as I'm sure you're thinking. Review: I just finished a photo essay on this movie, which you can (and should) read at This movie is only worth buying 'cause of the subtitles. Once again, you can find all that out by reaing the essay (link above) This one's a real winner, eh?. ;) |
Jamesman,
Did you get your credit card charged every month or so when you bought it? I've heard rumors to that fact. |
???
|
It wasn't his review.
Here's some of my favorite reviews: *Wizard hate fantasy *Put Shakira in Two Towers *Now you don't have to watch Fight Club anymore *Or Brotherhood of the Wolf *Like, Austin Powers is funny ok bye And add to that any five-line review where the writer says he can't tell anything about the movie without ruining it for you. Ninjavenom, be sure to paste us the contents of "i hump a monkey". It's in "waiting to be approved" right now and I'm sure it's golden. |
Yeah, it's not like the music reviews are any better. There's that guy that does the Insane Clown Posse albums and DVDs who runs through the whole set list basically saying if a song is good or bad.
Me? I write a fucking battle chant when I reviewed Manowar "Kings of Metal"!!! |
Movie: "i hump a monkey"
Year: now Rated: Unrated Genre: Action / Adventure Director: Writer: Reviewer: jackass Plot: i hump a monkey Review: i hump a monkey Overall Rating: 1 :/ |
OK, so I was wrong. :(
|
Wow...and I thought a lot of the classic game reviews were bad.
|
It would be great if that review was posted. :)
|
Quote:
|
Oh Lord. I wish i didn't have to post that review. At least the guy is open minded. :/
|
How come my Princess Mononoke and My Big Fat Greek Wedding reviews never got up :/?
|
I'm just glad my reviews havn't been reviewed. Although I probably am a bit liberal with the point system.
|
I remember putting up a mononoke review, rongi. Maybe you skipped over it, or maybe it was too short and got deleted. Write longer ones and i'll put 'em up. I haven't seen any from you lately gremlin, you been sick or somethin'?
|
Quote:
|
All times are GMT -4. The time now is 08:43 PM. |
Powered by: vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.