I-Mockery Forum - I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips)

But balsawood FLOATS.

I'm under the care of a high-risk specialist. I'm in there all the time. I had my twins last year just fine, they were just preemies and didn't survive, their lungs weren't developed enough. So we're keeping our fingers crossed.

Having a kid doesn't suck as much as they let on on TV. There's a stage that feels like horrible diarrhea cramps, but you live through it. There's a stage that feels like stinging/burning, but you live through it. I mean, it sucks...it's called labor, not happyfuntime, but I had my twins a month apart...childbirth twice in two months...and neither time was of the theatrical "scream and pant" variety. It is some really bad pain, but don't let Hollywood hose you.

Zhukov

Oct 5th, 2009 09:29 AM

When measured in the three wood categories of stiffness, bendability and compressibility, balsa is the strongest. It is also classed as a hardwood, not a softwood, despite being the softest of woods.

Kitsa is broadleaved, deciduous and an angiosperm.

Kitsa

Oct 5th, 2009 09:43 AM

damn straight.

executioneer

Oct 5th, 2009 10:11 AM

i got blood pee, how concerned should i be on a scale from 1-10

stevetothepast

Oct 5th, 2009 10:13 AM

6.5

executioneer

Oct 5th, 2009 10:24 AM

is the appropriate response to a 6.5 "buy a half gallon of cranberry juice cocktail and drink it all, then wait for it to just go away on its own" cause i really hope it is

Kitsa

Oct 5th, 2009 10:28 AM

what color is the blood, is it bright or dark?

does your pee smell weird?

do you have fever and/or chills?

Are you having any bladder or flank pain?

Are chunks of anything coming out in your pee? Is it cloudy?

executioneer

Oct 5th, 2009 10:32 AM

i THINK it smells weird. it's still kind of bright + clear for most of it, there is usu. one blood clot, no pains/fever/chills

Fathom Zero

Oct 5th, 2009 10:35 AM

Don't eat so many salts, either. My diet is shit and my pee looks like beef broth.

Kitsa

Oct 5th, 2009 10:40 AM

Do you have an urgent care center you could go to for a urinalysis? That costs less than an ER visit and some insurances cover it.

executioneer

Oct 5th, 2009 10:54 AM

not that i know of (update i did not have any noticable blood this last time nor any clots, i will schedule a dr appt today)

executioneer

Oct 5th, 2009 10:55 AM

also this was probably around for like two weeks but got aggravated by my going to a concert and participating in a mosh pit + drinking at least 16oz of whiskey + 2 aspirin before bed

Colonel Flagg

Oct 5th, 2009 11:03 AM

Could be stones - either kidney or bladder. Either can get right painful. Experience hurts. :(

Kitsa

Oct 5th, 2009 11:07 AM

you might just have a little kidney stone or something. I used to get them all the time, and usually I could get through it by drinking massive amounts of fluid and gritting my teeth through the worst of it. The only problem with those is that you can't always pass them, and then you need medical intervention. Or there's an underlying issue that's creating the stones, and tweaking your diet or taking some meds makes them not happen again. That's why they analyze the stones.

Mine always seemed to be brought on by having to walk in downtown Chicago. I have no idea why, but it seemed like I had one every time I got back from Chicago. Did great until I had one in 2001 that I couldn't pass. I didn't register any pain but I couldn't stop puking, and apparently I was in shock. Had to have surgery for that one :(

I'm glad you're going to the Dr. Your doctor will get it sorted out.

10,000 Volt Ghost

Oct 5th, 2009 01:07 PM

Kitsa: Congratulations :)

Willie: Hope its nothing too serious :(

RaNkeri

Oct 5th, 2009 01:41 PM

Anatomy quiz tomorrow :/

captain516

Oct 5th, 2009 03:10 PM

Will you get to use a cadaver?

Chojin

Oct 5th, 2009 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by captain516 (Post 651822)

Will you get to use a cadaver?

AS A WEAPON

RaNkeri

Oct 5th, 2009 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by captain516 (Post 651822)

Will you get to use a cadaver?

Nah, it's just a regular quiz.

Man, I've studied hard and I think I'm well prepared, but I still feel nervous and stress like hell.

Dimnos

Oct 5th, 2009 03:53 PM

Go get a hooker. They have those in Finland right?

Fathom Zero

Oct 5th, 2009 03:58 PM

FINALLY.

FUCK YES. SOMETHING I'M GOOD AT IN CHEMISTRY: ELECTROMAGNETIC WAVES.

Colonel Flagg

Oct 5th, 2009 05:03 PM

Electrochemistry? Redox reactions? Dielectric loss and/or capacitance measurements?

Describe, please.

Fathom Zero

Oct 5th, 2009 05:12 PM

It's General Chemistry, the fourth unit in the book. Uncomplicated, but strangely easier for me than calorimetry.

Mainly dealing with wavelengths and determining hertz based on them, at least at the moment. It's easy for me.

Kitsa

Oct 5th, 2009 05:19 PM

Good luck, Rankeri :) A&P is brutal.

Colonel Flagg

Oct 5th, 2009 09:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 651842)

Mainly dealing with wavelengths and determining hertz based on them, at least at the moment. It's easy for me.

That's the basics of spectroscopy my friend, which was the core of my PhD thesis. We have something in common .... maybe! :)

captain516

Oct 6th, 2009 03:14 AM

I don't normally like cheeseburgers, but daaaaaaaaaamn if this doesn't make me want one.

Kitsa

Oct 6th, 2009 10:21 AM

I just stepped in cold cat puke :(

Fathom Zero

Oct 6th, 2009 10:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Colonel Flagg (Post 651884)

That's the basics of spectroscopy my friend, which was the core of my PhD thesis. We have something in common .... maybe! :)

It's a shame I loathe chemistry and the sciences and will not pursue a career or education in them following this semester. :(

Dimnos

Oct 6th, 2009 10:40 AM

Quote:

No more worry about losing your virginity. With this product, you can have your first night back anytime. Insert this artificial hymen into your vagina carefully. It will expand a little and make you feel tight. When your lover penetrate, it will ooze out a liquid that look like blood not too much but just the right amount. Add in a few moans and groans, you will pass through undetectable. Its easy to use, clinically proven non-toxic to human and has no side effects, no pain to use and no allergic reaction.

Colonel Flagg

Oct 6th, 2009 10:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 651937)

It's a shame I loathe chemistry and the sciences and will not pursue a career or education in them following this semester. :(

Unfortunately a sentiment shared by many. :(

Fathom Zero

Oct 6th, 2009 11:02 AM

Makes your job significantly more lucrative, though, I'd imagine.

I never had a mind for it. I was always good at math, but I don't like to apply it. It's boring. Same thing with chemistry, though I know much less.

Fathom Zero

Oct 6th, 2009 12:45 PM

Hay guyz, i just realized something.

I've never seen Jeff Lynne's eyes and that scares me.

Colonel Flagg

Oct 6th, 2009 02:20 PM

Jeff Lynne without shades:

Although with all that hair, how would you know?

Tadao

Oct 6th, 2009 02:28 PM

IT BURNS!

Dimnos

Oct 6th, 2009 03:26 PM

Uh huh. :\

Tadao

Oct 6th, 2009 03:47 PM

No, not that. :rolleyes

Fathom Zero

Oct 6th, 2009 03:56 PM

I'm having an allergic reaction to Jeff Lynne's artificial hymen.

Dimnos

Oct 6th, 2009 04:25 PM

b_squared

Oct 6th, 2009 04:33 PM

Some cops love their job, others fake it.

Fathom Zero

Oct 6th, 2009 05:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 652000)

hey fathom take your purely theoretical understanding of pretty much fucking everything elsewhere if you please

go live a little and then you may come back with an opinion.

So I haven't smoked your faggotty clove flavoured smokes. I've had the misfortune of trying a lot of shitty tobaccos, some that smelled like maple syrup and butterscotch. I don't care for them. Don't care for cigarettes or pipes in general, really. I've got a brand of cigars I like, not that they're really the best, but I like them. They're expensive, but I don't smoke so often.

I don't have to prove anything to you, you fucking goon. In fact, I think I'm more of a faggot for responding to you.

Babs	Oct 6th, 2009 06:16 PM

what's up with the tough love?

MattJack

Oct 6th, 2009 06:19 PM

Fathom Zero: Dr. Tufflove

Fathom Zero

Oct 6th, 2009 06:43 PM

IMMA STEAL THE ROCK BUS.

Chojin

Oct 6th, 2009 07:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 652006)

in other words

MY DADDY SMOKED SO I'LL NEVER DO IT MAN JUST WATCH YOU'LL NEVER SEE ME WITH THAT CANCER STICK BRAH FUCK THAT NOISE I'M MOVING OUT WHEN I TURN 18 MAN YOU'LL SEE YOU'LL ALL SEE

:pagebrak

Fathom Zero

Oct 6th, 2009 07:44 PM

You really know how to make a guy's ass tired.

By the way, while we're on the subject, I'd also like the opportunity to recommend the Opus X Fuente Fuente. I recommended them to Sethomas a while back.

They aren't cheap, however.

MLE	Oct 6th, 2009 11:22 PM

I appreciate the use of the page brak. I imagine he's saying his post instead.

Dimnos

Oct 7th, 2009 10:04 AM

I smoked for 10 years. All I can say is none of it is worth a damn and anything with "flavor" sucks ass. Its all about the nicotine man. Sweet sweet sweet nicotine how I miss you. :tear

Fathom Zero

Oct 7th, 2009 12:05 PM

http://kogibbq.com/our-menu/

Why do I live in Nowhere?

Colonel Flagg

Oct 7th, 2009 12:57 PM

"They never come up into the hills!"

:(

Dixie

Oct 7th, 2009 01:03 PM

My plans are almost ruined :wah
I was gonna go visit some friends in DC, then go see some friends in Philly and go to a fest with them.
But stupid work had to call and offer me a 10 day run.
I'm still going to Philly goddammit.

10,000 Volt Ghost

Oct 7th, 2009 01:31 PM

RUN FASTER THEN

Fathom Zero

Oct 7th, 2009 01:48 PM

mmmm Kimchi Pastrami Melt...

Dimnos

Oct 7th, 2009 02:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 652147)

mmmm Kimchi Pastrami Melt...

:suicide

Fathom Zero

Oct 7th, 2009 02:21 PM

Dimnos

Oct 7th, 2009 02:36 PM

stevetothepast

Oct 7th, 2009 02:45 PM

hehehe

Tadao

Oct 7th, 2009 03:15 PM

http://media.nbcphiladelphia.com/ima...+hold+hand.jpg

executioneer

Oct 7th, 2009 04:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 652147)

mmmm Kimchi Pastrami Melt...

sounds reuben-esque :lol

Fathom Zero

Oct 7th, 2009 04:49 PM

:lol

Pub Lover

Oct 7th, 2009 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shrubfest (Post 651450)

Someone just bought me a witches broomstick, then threw conkers down my front.
It's been an odd sort of day.

I hope they were shelled. Who throws spiky balls down a lady's shirt? :eek

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 651775)

The NZ bird... are you talking about the Kiwi? The MOA? That big, grey, parrot look-alike that has trouble mating and whose name alludes me right now?

Kea? Kakapo? Or maybe Takahe? They are all pretty bad at getting it on. :(

Dixie

Oct 7th, 2009 06:24 PM

:wahi'm not going:wah

Fathom Zero

Oct 7th, 2009 06:25 PM

But you're delighted for having a job.

Tadao

Oct 7th, 2009 06:26 PM

Freakin gay

Fathom Zero

Oct 7th, 2009 06:33 PM

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Japanese_rhinoceros_beetle

Chojin

Oct 7th, 2009 08:39 PM

secret time, guys

Code:

i don't actually hate fathom zero or anyone on here, but i can't make it easy for them

don't tell them i said that, ok

Tadao

Oct 7th, 2009 09:02 PM

I refuse to give up my secrets.

Pub Lover

Oct 7th, 2009 09:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kgp4death (Post 652234)

you guys are funny when anything is out of your realm of thinking it sucks. The rest of the population would say that about this place, it's funny that now that the shoe is on the other foot and there is something different in front of you guys, you guys decide to revert back to what the rest of the population would do and become "faggots". If anything you guys should welcome different because to me thats what places like this are about. So I am releasing a text/level hack I do not need to change the graphics/sprites to me graphics/sprites are not important its the game and the story I guess thats out of the realm of thinking around here....Whatever I guess I just do not care what anyone else thinks and I am just going to do whatever the fuck I want to do, a concept that I think some not all of you guys forgot a while ago.

It is funny that realm of thinking something different can make caring "faggots" some not here maybe. :rock

Tadao

Oct 8th, 2009 01:46 AM

Howard on Misfits.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HowardC (Post 647291)

Nearly all of the Misfits songs have been covered by Metallica, including Die Die Die My Darling. The Metallica versions are also vastly superior. I hate to knock the Misfits, because they are a very creative band, but let's face it, Danzig can't sing and the rest of the band can't play. The Metallica versions have crisp, intelligable lyrics and sharp, complex guitar work that make for a far more enjoyable listen. And for the record, except for that odd few months when they were going to a therapist (St. Anger) Metallica has NEVER and will NEVER suck.

I'm not a fan of this album at all. Sounds like most misfit albums, namely a drugged up alcoholic mumbling and screaming while the rest of the band seemly plays as irratic and badly as possible. And before you ask yes, I AM a fan of punk. The problem is it's more of a concert medium and doesn't translate well to an album.

I would recommend instead you buy Metallica's "Garage Days" album. It contains two of the songs listed as well as some motorhead and other covers.

Can it get worse? Yes! Howard on Ghost 'N Goblins

Quote:

Originally Posted by HowardC (Post 652267)

I absolutely HATE this series and it sucks because I really want to love it. The difficulty is the issue of course. The problem I have with it is it's "fake" difficulty and not true difficulty. Many of the problems with the original GNG were caused by poor programming (monsters showing up at completely random spots, some spots in which it's physically impossibly to dodge them, poor jumping control, poor firing control ect..) and unfortunately they have been carried over all of these years. It reminds me of bionic command in this respect. So while I always enjoyed the characters and visuals of the game I could never really like it. Keep in mind I LOVE hard games so that isn't it, I just don't like the ones where poor gameplay mechanics are what cause the difficulty. I had a blast with Meg Man 9 for example and beat it farily quickly.

Zhukov

Oct 8th, 2009 04:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 652206)

Kea? Kakapo? Or maybe Takahe? They are all pretty bad at getting it on. :(

Kakapo I was thinking of. Thinking it was grey rather than green for some reason... maybe I saw a dirty one.

Dimnos

Oct 8th, 2009 10:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HowardC (Post 647291)

Metallica has NEVER and will NEVER suck.

:lol

But no... Really... They just slob the knob. No actual hoover action.

Pub Lover

Oct 8th, 2009 01:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 652266)

Where the hell was my birthday thread

fuck you darkvare how about we just make you moderator and i'll never post here again

goddamnit

Dude, no one even likes you. :(

Come over here & I'll give you a hug. :(

MarioRPG

Oct 8th, 2009 03:01 PM

HOW DO YOU EVEN PRONOUNCE YOUR USERNAME

Kitsa

Oct 8th, 2009 04:42 PM

essooooleeem

DevilWearsPrada

Oct 8th, 2009 08:13 PM

ess-ooh-oh-limm

Pub Lover

Oct 9th, 2009 02:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kgp4death (Post 652434)

It's really hard to get straight answers around here. or, is it just me?

To the casual eye it may appear to be self-aware. We know better.

Fathom Zero

Oct 9th, 2009 08:48 AM

I'll give you guys a hint; the second "n" is silent.

Dimnos

Oct 9th, 2009 02:42 PM

Last night my office flooded. The water has since retreated and has left a bunch of dead worms. It smells like a fucking bait shop in here. :(

Tadao

Oct 9th, 2009 02:43 PM

When life gives you worms, go fucking fishing.

Tadao

Oct 9th, 2009 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 652487)

I called the city to get on the list for "special trash day" so they could take away an old cabinet we had that was broken. That was apparently standard operating procedure and I wanted to do things right.

The woman told me they wouldn't take anything but "intact" pieces of furniture. What the fuck? It's trash. The regular trash won't take it and the recycling won't take it.

And what was with all the specific questions about what sort of cabinet it was? I bet we're furnishing someone's house.

I lived in a trailer home over looking a culdesac. One day I saw some fag in a truck dump crap right in the middle of it and leave. I took down his license and called the cops. Dude was giving me the stink eye the whole time.

Well, the cops went to his house and the guy told them, I KNEW HE WAS CALLING YOU! Turns out it was a bi-yearly trash dump area that I, nor the cops knew about. We all had a good laugh, except for the old man with the stink eye.

But yeah, it was broken useless shit and a bob cat was out there for 2 days dumping the mountain of junk into trucks.

Kitsa

Oct 9th, 2009 04:24 PM

Weird that no one knew about it and that it was just in the middle of a cul de sac.

Usually whenever we put something out, the people across the street wait till dark and drag it over to their house. The guy next door is more blatant, he'll waddle right across the yard to come over and dig through stuff.

Tadao

Oct 9th, 2009 04:27 PM

This culdesac had no homes facing it, it was more of a turn about at the end of a long dead end street. Perfect place for it really. But my front porch faced it during my white trash hay day.

It must have been posted in the paper or something. When I found out it was legal, I started dumping useless shit there too.

Tadao

Oct 9th, 2009 04:31 PM

http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&sour...67.06,,0,22.06

Hahahaha my abandoned trailer home is gone. Oh city of Fresno, are you still looking for me?

Tadao

Oct 9th, 2009 06:17 PM

I don't watch Conan but this is funny.

http://tv.yahoo.com/blog/has-conan-o...to-an-end--675

Guitar Woman

Oct 9th, 2009 10:23 PM

that facial expression

LordSappington

Oct 10th, 2009 11:21 PM

I'm going to see a neurologist Tuesday. For the past few months, I've been having extreme memory loss (forgetting names, what I was doing while doing it, blanking out on hours at a time), vertigo and spacial recognition problems, and having muscle spasms in my right arm, where I start uncontrollably clenching my arm and hand.
I'm very, very nervous. :(

Kitsa

Oct 10th, 2009 11:24 PM

I think it's a good idea to visit the neurologist.

Guitar Woman

Oct 11th, 2009 02:22 AM

I was having shit like that too, and then I started going to sleep for more than 5 hours a night.

Zhukov

Oct 11th, 2009 10:22 AM

I get bouts of that, but it's usually right after a migraine. I had one today actually.

The worst thing about being sick in bed is being sick, the second worst thing is knocking your vomit bucket over. The best thing is not having to go to work.

Kitsa

Oct 11th, 2009 10:42 AM

ugh, sorry you're sick.

I was mad the other day at the doctor's office. I was due to have a breathing treatment and I heard the nurse coughing and hacking in the hallway. Then she came in, opened the bag of single-use mouthpieces for the treatment, dug around with her germy fingers and held out the mouthpiece to me with the mouth end still in her hand.

I tried to make a joke of wiping off the mouthpiece, but dammit. Now I'm going to get sick. I know she didn't wash her hands.

Aaarg

Oct 11th, 2009 10:44 AM