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-   -   Pet Bear Eats Woman (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69703140)

VaporTrailx1 Oct 5th, 2009 08:49 PM

Pet Bear Eats Woman
 
http://news.aol.com/article/pet-bear-kills-kelly-ann-walz-in-ross/703020?icid=main|aimzones|dl1|link6|http%3A%2F%2Fn ews.aol.com%2Farticle%2Fpet-bear-kills-kelly-ann-walz-in-ross%2F703020


Need I really say anything?

kahljorn Oct 5th, 2009 08:57 PM

i feel bad for the bear :(

see this all relates to my capital punishment argument that poor bear was shot because it was forced to live in a tiny cage and probably got claustraphobia and went insane and he tried to escape but he needed food for the journey.

Colonel Flagg Oct 5th, 2009 09:35 PM

This happened less than 30 miles from my place of business.

The authorities (animal control) inspected her place, which also housed an African Lion and a Bengal Tiger - and found no violations. WTF? I want what they were smoking!

Kahl is right, I'm sorry for the bear in this situation. The woman was full on nutso.

Dimnos Oct 6th, 2009 10:47 AM

Yeah. Poor bear. And lion and tiger if they were there too. :tear

Colonel Flagg Oct 6th, 2009 10:54 AM

The lion and tiger, I hope will be remanded to the authorities, and will eventually be housed in a public zoological society. At least that's what I hope. However, as they were being kept as PETS (wtf was this idiot thinking) they may not have the necessary social imperatives to be able to function with others of their kind. :(

Fathom Zero Oct 6th, 2009 11:05 AM

Assholes. I loathe people like this.

executioneer Oct 6th, 2009 11:12 AM

lion and tiger and bear? OH MY

10,000 Volt Ghost Oct 6th, 2009 11:54 AM

"What're you doin bear?"

I feel bad for the bear too. S/He should have had at least a chance to talk to an attorney before getting shot.

Judge in court: "How does the defense plead?"

Defense attorney: "My client pleads not guilty on account of being a bear your honor."

Dimnos Oct 6th, 2009 04:09 PM

Not about the same incident but I think its relevant.


Kitsa Oct 6th, 2009 05:03 PM

We were at the Henry Vilas Zoo in Madison a couple of years ago...it's a free zoo, sort of small. Anyway, there was this polar bear and it was on a platform separated from the humans by a 6 or 8 foot trench...can't remember the exact size but it didn't look entirely adequate. And the bear was acting weird- it was pacing rapidly back and forth, looking at us, looking at the trench, pacing some more. It looked like my cats do when they're trying to decide if they can make a jump or not.

Operating strictly on instinct, I suggested we get out of there. And later I found out that there had been some sort of attack there sometime in the past.

Anyway, here's the bear.

http://www.channel3000.com/entertain...36/detail.html

I think humans really underestimate big animals. They're just not pets.

b_squared Oct 6th, 2009 05:48 PM

Quote:

The authorities (animal control) inspected her place, which also housed an African Lion and a Bengal Tiger - and found no violations. WTF? I want what they were smoking!
Usually animal control is the last agency in line issuing permits for these types of animals. First would be State Fish and Game, then USDA, finally Health Dept. Since most of these are required by the state they are usually more restrictive than local county/city animal control laws. If animal control issues a wild animal permit the first three agencys must have approved the owner first and inspections will have to be current. Then the ispection is based on what the local city/county laws are for that type of animal. So the WTF should apply to several agencys not just animal control.

10,000 Volt Ghost Oct 6th, 2009 06:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 651995)

Anyway, here's the bear.

http://www.channel3000.com/entertain...36/detail.html
(But Henry Vilas Zoo officials said Nanuq must go to a zoo in Buffalo, N.Y., to mate with a female as part of a nationwide captive breeding program.)

I think humans really underestimate big animals. They're just not pets.

YAY! I got a new bear and didn't even realize it.

MLE Oct 6th, 2009 11:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 651946)
lion and tiger and bear? OH MY

hahahahahaha

Colonel Flagg Oct 7th, 2009 05:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by b_squared (Post 652013)
Usually animal control is the last agency in line issuing permits for these types of animals. First would be State Fish and Game, then USDA, finally Health Dept. Since most of these are required by the state they are usually more restrictive than local county/city animal control laws. If animal control issues a wild animal permit the first three agencys must have approved the owner first and inspections will have to be current. Then the ispection is based on what the local city/county laws are for that type of animal. So the WTF should apply to several agencys not just animal control.

I was wrong, B^2 - it was the State Game Board who issued the permit. I had figured that permitting would require some agency within the State Gov. but assumed it would be through animal control, or something like it.

So I apologize for any inaccuracy, real or implied in my statement. Still, as a concerned PA resident, WTF were they thinking?

Chojin Oct 7th, 2009 09:03 AM

YEAH PEOPLE WHO HAVE EXOTIC PETS DESERVE TO DIE

you people are idiots

Fathom Zero Oct 7th, 2009 09:16 AM

Yes. Yes they should.

b_squared Oct 7th, 2009 12:02 PM

It's cool C. Flagg. I was just venting job related baggage. Since animal control is my job it kinda ticks me off when people blame us for another agencys mistake. Sorry about that.

Dimnos Oct 7th, 2009 02:21 PM

So what is it you guys actually do if you dont do this? Aside from drowning stray puppies that is.

Dimnos Oct 7th, 2009 02:23 PM

Oh and not so much that they deserve to die. Just dont be fucking shocked when the tiger you thought would make a kick ass pet decides to maul and eat your ass.

Zhukov Oct 8th, 2009 11:00 AM

The law of the jungle has already found the owner guilty, punishable by death. We humans with our courts and books need not interfere further.

Dimnos Oct 8th, 2009 11:14 AM

They should make the only way to acquire an exotic pet license to beat the animal in arena combat. They could put it on TV with commercials and everything.

b_squared Oct 8th, 2009 01:16 PM

That right Dimnos I qualified for my job by having a resume filled with puppy drowning experience and rounded it out with cat skinning. :eyeroll
My post said I issue permits for wild animals only after the owner has been approved by the other three agencys first. No approvial then the animal is impounded and removed from the property. The animal will then be released to an owner/ agency qualified via permits to keep such animals.
Fish and Game here in California do not issue permits to people for the purpose of keeping wild animals as pets. Usually in order to qualify to get a permit they have to keep the animals for the purpose of wildlife education, conservation of species, or as a wildlife rescue. Some excemptions are made for animals in circus and animals used for movies. Rescue is mainly wild animals formally kept as pets, which were impounded because improper care or failure to secure permits to keep such animals.

b_squared Oct 8th, 2009 01:58 PM

Here are a couple of photos of film sets where wild animals were used. I was on set doing my job to make sure that the conditions of the permit requirements were being followed.


Elephant was for an Obama campain ad:


And lastly here is and impound of a Rhesus Macque I took from a home because they did not have the proper permits by any of the state agencys or my dept. The poor guy was kept in inadequate housing, tied on a dog leash and fed a diet of tortillas and bananas. This animal was going to be kept as a pet. He is now with a monkey sancuary licensed with proper permits and kept not as a pet but as a wild animal with others of his kind. He will probally never be able to be released back to the wild.

stevetothepast Oct 8th, 2009 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dimnos (Post 652310)
They should make the only way to acquire an exotic pet license to beat the animal in arena combat. They could put it on TV with commercials and everything.

I would DVR that shit. But only if the animals had the advantage, no weapons for the human except maybe a rock or something.

stevetothepast Oct 8th, 2009 03:19 PM

I'm glad you saved that monkey, b to the power of 2

Tadao Oct 8th, 2009 03:32 PM

So, B2. What are your thoughts on ASCPA and ALF. I myself are not fond of PETA or Greenpeace. I understand that you may choose to ignore all opinion on ALF.

Dimnos Oct 8th, 2009 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevetothepast (Post 652352)
I would DVR that shit. But only if the animals had the advantage, no weapons for the human except maybe a rock or something.


I was thinking something like a sharp stick if they wanted a tiger. Or maybe nothing for monkey. If they wanted something small like a bird they would have to have one arm tied behind their back. Possibly blindfolded.

stevetothepast Oct 8th, 2009 05:11 PM

For the bear I would probably give them at least a sharp stick. maybe even a sharp stick and a small rock.

what would you rather go up against a bear or a tiger? P.S. they are both hungry at the time of fight.

Dimnos Oct 8th, 2009 05:51 PM

Bear.

The Leader Oct 8th, 2009 05:53 PM

If I had a pet bear I would dress it up and make it play ice hockey with me.

10,000 Volt Ghost Oct 8th, 2009 05:54 PM

If I had a pet bear I would make it play Tekken with me.

Dimnos Oct 8th, 2009 05:56 PM


Dimnos Oct 8th, 2009 05:56 PM

If I had a pet bear we would get drunk and ride unicycles together.

stevetothepast Oct 8th, 2009 06:08 PM

If i had a pet bear I would keep it locked in a 15x15 ft. cage until it ate me while I was feeding it and cleaning it's cage.

Tadao Oct 8th, 2009 06:09 PM

Really? You guys are lame. If I had a pet bear, I would starve it and then let it loose on a playground.

Dimnos Oct 8th, 2009 09:21 PM

I might have done that after me and the bear got drunk.

b_squared Oct 8th, 2009 10:14 PM

Tadeo as far as animal rights groups like peta and alf I dont care for them. ASPCA is alright because they usually are not running around throwing blood on people wearing fur.
I would save a person before I would save an animal. I would not firebomb, threaten or use terrorist like tactics to get people to stop eating meat, wearing fur or using lab rats.
There is disturbing abuse of animals which laws were written to protect them. I enforce those laws. Likewise there are laws written to protect people from animals, I enforce those laws as well.
I hope you get what I mean.

Tadao Oct 8th, 2009 10:46 PM

I totally understand. As far as who I would save first, it would depend on the person. Human race really gets me down sometimes.

Dimnos Oct 9th, 2009 10:34 AM

Do you eat meat B^2?

b_squared Oct 9th, 2009 01:16 PM

I agree with you Tadeo.

Dimnos,
Yes I eat :meat

Kitsa Oct 9th, 2009 08:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by b_squared (Post 652334)
That right Dimnos I qualified for my job by having a resume filled with puppy drowning experience and rounded it out with cat skinning. :eyeroll

:\

kgp4death Oct 13th, 2009 06:28 PM

If it wasn't for people taking personal exotic pets like this there would be a lot more species extinction. That being said animals are much purer then humans, humans suck actually especially you Domnos.....now feed the bear a fish, It will be ok.

:squigly ----> :domo

:)

executioneer Oct 13th, 2009 07:04 PM

yeah black bears are in real danger of extinction :rolleyes

kgp4death Oct 13th, 2009 09:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 653041)
yeah black bears are in real danger of extinction :rolleyes

yeah some sub-species of lions, tigers and black bears are on the endangered species list I think it is Louisiana black bear, alot of lions are endangered and like 4-5 sub-species of tigers....this women was a hero in my mind for caring for endangered or soon to be endangered animals.....not making this shit up.

Colonel Flagg Oct 13th, 2009 10:29 PM

This woman was a nutjob, and you need to get a clue.

executioneer Oct 14th, 2009 12:06 AM

you know you're right, letting an exotic animal taste human flesh so it has to be destroyed IS a good way to keep them from going extinct

kgp4death Oct 14th, 2009 04:11 AM

See i knew you would come around, 5 points for me.

VaporTrailx1 Oct 14th, 2009 03:57 PM

Why do we get so upset when animals eat people? I'm surprised humans aren't eaten by animals more often. Think about it, an unarmed human has to be one of the easiest kills an animal could ever make.

And as a side note - according to a lot of studies I've read, animals aren't really afraid of us, they just think we smell like shit and that's why they stay away.

Dimnos Oct 15th, 2009 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kgp4death (Post 653039)
If it wasn't for people taking personal exotic pets like this there would be a lot more species extinction.


kgp4death Oct 15th, 2009 05:48 PM

whats the difference

executioneer Oct 15th, 2009 07:12 PM

zoos generally have mating programs and better enclosures, plus there's less of a "look how much of a rich, irresponsible fuck i am" air to them

Dimnos Oct 16th, 2009 11:05 AM

Not to mention zoos also have trained vets and professional animal handlers. Ah and if one guy does get attacked there is normally other people around to help him out. :\

kgp4death Oct 16th, 2009 05:17 PM

well if this women had the proper papers and stuff then i would think she knows what she was doing. This wasn't just some random person with wild animals this was a person licensed to have these animals. They probably got better care there then at some zoo where they send in 18 year olds in to clean up the animal crap. Also, i would rather just be chilling out then have to preform for all these random assholes that want to see you do something funny.

The Leader Oct 16th, 2009 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kgp4death (Post 653549)
Also, i would rather just be chilling out then have to preform for all these random assholes that want to see you do something funny.

That's a circus, not a zoo.

Colonel Flagg Oct 16th, 2009 09:28 PM

I'm only going to say this one more time.

If she knew what she was doing she would still be alive.

Please stop being a moron, KGP.

kgp4death Oct 17th, 2009 12:46 AM

Hey some times shit happens. I mean look at Steve Erwin I would say he knew his shit.

The Leader Oct 17th, 2009 01:59 PM

I don't know what meaning shit has when you use it like that. It happens but one can know it as well?

kgp4death Oct 17th, 2009 02:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Leader (Post 653724)
I don't know what meaning shit has when you use it like that. It happens but one can know it as well?

replace shit with stuff and you are good to go with translation

Colonel Flagg Oct 17th, 2009 02:35 PM

Steve Irwin was a professional naturalist and television personality, and he never tried to keep a bear or a lion as a pet. He would have been the first one to tell that woman that she was a nutjob.

Stop trying to argue an asinine point. It cheapens anything else you try to say.

kgp4death Oct 17th, 2009 03:07 PM

yeah, he just took his 8 year old daughter and wife on random quests to find exotic and potentially dangerous and poisonous animals. Wild animals are very unpredictable much more then animals you know and love. Both are still very unpredictable. All i am trying to get at is that being a "nutjob" is in the eye of the beholder and is very objective, And if this women had the proper paper work who i am i to call her a "nutjob". I know nothing about her (besides what some millionaire on tv told me to think of her). I say god rest both of there souls and lets not drag these peoples names though the dirt because we don't know shit.

Colonel Flagg Oct 17th, 2009 05:35 PM

I live and work in the Allentown area, which is 15 miles from where this nutjob lived.

In other words, listen to me, and shut up.

kgp4death Oct 17th, 2009 06:25 PM

So you are saying you knew her.....sorry didn't know you guys were Bum Buddies

MLE Oct 17th, 2009 06:28 PM

Jesus Christ people, stop responding to him already.

Kitsa Oct 17th, 2009 07:07 PM

Dull knives are supposed to be more dangerous than sharp ones because you get sloppy and careless with them. I imagine the same applies to exotic pets vs. the same animals encountered in the wild.

Colonel Flagg Oct 17th, 2009 07:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MLE (Post 653767)
Jesus Christ people, stop responding to him already.

Sorry M. It pissed me off so much that I lost track of what I was doing.

MLE Oct 17th, 2009 08:59 PM

Don't admit to the success of trolls.

kgp4death Oct 18th, 2009 08:40 AM

Not a troll just misunderstood

The Leader Oct 18th, 2009 11:48 AM

YOU'RE THE MONSTERS!

Chojin Oct 18th, 2009 06:53 PM

And then John was a zombie.

The Leader Oct 18th, 2009 11:04 PM

That's not what I... Whatever.

Chojin Oct 19th, 2009 05:45 PM

i actually find myself agreeing with kgp in this thread, now that i've read it

Zhukov Oct 19th, 2009 06:44 PM

Steve Irwin was not a professional by any means. He was a redneck who got a TV show. He was constantly called out on not knowing what he was talking about and ruining animal habitats. He was fined thousands of dollars for wrecking a pengiuin nesting area by tampling all over it and proclaming how beautifiul they were.

David Attenbourough has never been killed by dangerous animals. Sometimes zookeepers get attacked, but more often than not it's the people who have no idea, or just a basic grasp on how dangerous an animal can be. Just dangerous enough to have as a cool pet, really.

kgp4death Oct 19th, 2009 07:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 654023)
i actually find myself agreeing with kgp in this thread, now that i've read it

WoW :rock

Colonel Flagg Oct 19th, 2009 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 654033)
Steve Irwin was not a professional by any means. He was a redneck who got a TV show. He was constantly called out on not knowing what he was talking about and ruining animal habitats. He was fined thousands of dollars for wrecking a pengiuin nesting area by tampling all over it and proclaming how beautifiul they were.

I defer to your obviously superior knowledge in this area. :bow

kgp4death Oct 19th, 2009 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Colonel Flagg (Post 654040)
I defer to your obviously superior knowledge in this area. :bow

Great let's just spit on everyones grave.

executioneer Oct 20th, 2009 02:24 AM

why stop at spitting

Evil Robot Oct 20th, 2009 08:35 PM

Looks like well have to find someone else to write the next stimulus bill!

Evil Robot Oct 20th, 2009 08:36 PM

Whoops there were two extra pages of posts there.

VaporTrailx1 Oct 22nd, 2009 03:10 PM

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/8320849.stm

I knew the Russians were behind it all! The Bears are revolting!

elx Oct 22nd, 2009 05:39 PM



well that just doesn't make sense..what could possibly go wrong

Dimnos Oct 22nd, 2009 05:56 PM

Oh Elx. You have a special way with ms paint. :lol

elx Oct 22nd, 2009 06:26 PM

Quote:

Kyrgyz police shot and killed the bear when they arrived on the scene. It is not clear what caused the attack.
this is the worst part. it's perfectly clear what caused the attack, it's a freakin' bear, they dressed it up, put it on skates, and forced it to dance around on ice in a circus. then the bear is shot when it behaves as it only knows how to. so sad.

i just wish it would've happened during the actual show, to teach everyone there a lesson.

Colonel Flagg Oct 23rd, 2009 05:22 AM

It's good having you back, Elx. :)

Zhukov Oct 23rd, 2009 08:01 AM

"Kyrgyz officials said the bear turned on the manager, 25-year-old Dmitry Potapov, during a rehearsal. "

This depresses me. I am not too far from 25 and I haven't even gotten close to achieving anything with my life comparable to manager of a circus :\

Dimnos Oct 23rd, 2009 11:16 AM

He was probably just the bears manager.

stevetothepast Oct 23rd, 2009 12:40 PM

I wish I was a bear manager...

executioneer Oct 23rd, 2009 04:23 PM

you'd get 10% of the raw salmon and steaks, nice

Chojin Oct 24th, 2009 05:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 654663)
you'd get 10% of the raw salmon and steaks, nice

i lol'd

kahljorn Oct 27th, 2009 08:44 PM

shes helping endagered species by keepng them in a 15x15 cage by itself with no other friends around except a fucking lion or whatever which it probably can't even talk to and they probably have too many differences anyway?

kgp4death Oct 27th, 2009 08:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kahljorn (Post 655408)
shes helping endagered species by keepng them in a 15x15 cage by itself with no other friends around except a fucking lion or whatever which it probably can't even talk to and they probably have too many differences anyway?

glad someone agrees with me....yep just chilling in a 15x15, sounds like my life.

Zhukov Oct 28th, 2009 08:45 AM

In a fight between a bear and a lion, the bear wins everytime. No contest. In fact they used to have such contests for crowd pleasers during the gold-rush in America.

The lion goes straight for the jugular, but the bear just slams its paws into the lion's skull and crushes it. Lions have very thin skulls, apparantly.

stevetothepast Oct 28th, 2009 02:27 PM

Who would win between a rabid golden lab and a rabid full grown female raccoon?

King Hadas Oct 28th, 2009 03:45 PM

If they're both rabid then haven't they both lost already.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 655516)
In a fight between a bear and a lion, the bear wins everytime. No contest. In fact they used to have such contests for crowd pleasers during the gold-rush in America.

The lion goes straight for the jugular, but the bear just slams its paws into the lion's skull and crushes it. Lions have very thin skulls, apparantly.

Bears are cool.

kgp4death Nov 4th, 2009 06:00 PM

Wild bear kills some terrorists (man, just setting myself up on this one.)

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/i...ow/5190873.cms

Tadao Nov 4th, 2009 06:04 PM

Poking fun at yourself isn't gonna help. You lost all hope fo getting along with people here once you became a little cry baby cum rag.

kgp4death Nov 4th, 2009 06:36 PM

Good I don't care about getting along with anyone. Actually, I am entertained by flame, so why don't you go fuck yourself.

Evil Robot Nov 4th, 2009 07:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kgp4death (Post 656949)
Good I don't care about getting along with anyone. Actually, I am entertained by flame, so why don't you go fuck yourself.

No you don't, What kind of emotionally vacant person are you to say that you enjoy people making fun of you. You sir are a god damned liar and thats why we hate you. Every thing you tell us about yourself is a LIE and we are not that stupid.

Dimnos Nov 4th, 2009 07:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kgp4death (Post 656939)
Wild bear kills some terrorists (man, just setting myself up on this one.)

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/i...ow/5190873.cms


Cool story. Was it your bro?

george Nov 4th, 2009 08:54 PM

:lol once again

kgp4death Nov 5th, 2009 12:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Evil Robot (Post 656985)
No you don't, What kind of emotionally vacant person are you to say that you enjoy people making fun of you. .

To me you are not a person you are just text on a screen. Real people are the people right in front of your face that can shake your hand.


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