the wire is the best show ever

kahljorn what's with you and cocks lately, man

I think everyone should use their skills to make a cock at some point. I did it.

Will a moustache do?

I would use my JO crystal on that dude. I bet I'd get powered up quick.

thats pretty hot. if you stuff a sock in your pants we can sew cocks all night long

SPEAKING OF SEWING

I'm making a roast duck for dinner (THIS IS THE LAST TIME I'LL BE ABLE TO COOK FOR A REALLY LONG TIME :( ) and I had to sew it's asshole shut because I stuffed it with sausage and apples

ITS GOING TO BE DELICIOUS I HOPE YOU ARE JEALOUS YOUR JEALOUSY MAKES IT TASTE EVEN BETTER

sausage and duck eh?

thats gun be one greasy son of a bitch

maybe that should read sausage and dick

what the hells with you and cocks lately rongi

lol kahljorn you still got it bud ;(

I didn't know duck was greasy. I've only had it like once before. This is my first time cooking it.

It's pretty greasy. More greasy than chicken or turkey.

Welp, this duck better be good I paid like 20+ dollars for it

confit that shit

I'm roasting it using a Julia Child recipe. Julia Child has never done me wrong (except for that one time I made salmon quenelles and they came out super gross but that was probably my fault for using too much heavy cream)

YOU NIGGAS ARE GIVING TOO MANY DAMN 40-DEGREE DAYS

SEE THE DWARVES AND SEE THE GIANTS. WHICH ONE WOULD YOU CHOOSE TO BE?

so how was your dick, rongi?

It was ok :/

I found a mushroom but I don't know what kind it is. I'm just gonna toss it out once I found out what kind.

When I get out of the Army I think I'm going to experiement with 'shrooms. Anyone ever do it? Good experiences? Bad experiences?

YOU SHOULD POST THAT IN THRASHOS NONSENSE THREAD

Bro, this is almost the only thread I ever post in.

I give them a thumbs up, based on my (very very) limited experience. The ones I got tasted like shit and I'm told that's a common thing. I suppose it would have to.

Just don't eat anything stupid.

EXCLUSIVELY

ive taken them before but never really gotten really fucked up ;/ but it put me in an amazing mood and i had some minor hallucinations

I either hear stories like yours, kahl, or ones that are the polar opposite. A buddy of mine took them for the first time and tripped balls for 17 hours straight. Now, I'm down for a good time, but 17 hours is a little excessive.

I'd like to find a happy middle-gound. Like the kind Bill Hicks took and got to speak to aliens.

if you want to talk to aliens smoke some dmt :lol

i dont really know how he tripped 17 hours :( he must've taken a lot or eaten some grapefruit with it or some shit

Yeah I'm pretty sure he took a hefty dosage. Oh well, I guess the only way to find out is try it out myself! I'll let you faggots know how it goes here in about nine months.

good luck with your baby

"like"

It's shaped like a puffball in its mushroomy stage, but doesn't have spikes like one. I have no idea wtf it is but I'd advise against tasting it, unidentified mushrooms scare the shit out of me.

i had two (basically) good experiences

my cousin had one good experience and one where he had a psychotic break and had to go to a mental hospital for a few weeks

Put it next to your cleavage and I'll tell you what species of mushroom that is.

I'm working for the cash machine. Fuck this bullshit. >:

HAHAHAH FUCK YOU EAST COAST! WESTSIDE FOR LIFE NIGGAS!

I hope Babs shitty little trailer house fell off of its blocks and rolled into a gas line and then blew up and then he lives but suffers from 3rd degree burns all over his body and then his girlfriend puts a bullet in his head because fuck that guy.

"IF THE EARTHQUAKE DON'T GETCHA THEN THE HURRICANE WILL"

Jerry Garcia - R.I.P.

Linkara is basically awful, yes. So's every other contributor to that place.

I've laughed at a select few Nostalgia Critic videos, but that was a while ago.

I woke up this afternoon to my bed being shook around

Man fuck you, earthquake. Can't a brother sleep in once in a while?

I'm homeless.

seriously? have you googled shelters for your area yet?

ANOTHER WOMTI, DEAR FUCKING LORD SAVE US.

I'm sure his mom knows several respectable men in the area who'll give at least her shelter for the evening, so long as she brings a bottle of Jim Beam and an overnight bag.

you can always join the circus

:/

Start listening to Discharge and sew patches all over your clothes. Also get a dog with rope leash

Mug Rongi

I exaggerated slightly. We are about a month away from being homeless. I'm looking into things and we have some good friends that we haven't asked yet, but would be more than willing to help us out.

I was supposed to go to school, but that doesn't look like it's going to pan out this semester. My mum's fiance skipped out on her and she's in a situation where that is really really inadequate, so we're gonna stick here in this apartment as long as we can. But even if I have a 40+ hour a week job, we can't afford to live here, nor can we really move.

My mum is trying her ass off to get a multi-thousand dollar promotion at work right now, so things are in limbo. She's one of five people being considered and easily the most qualified, but someone in a position of power at her job is trying to exert some force against her. It's really fucking pathetic. Moreover, she drives an hour and a half to work, so it's killing us. In the meantime, my grandparents are helping us out a bit and I've been selling some of my shit that I don't want anymore. I have too many things, anyway.

Srsly, the world is fucked. People can't afford to live anymore, if they were ever able to begin with.

Forgive me if I'm not online in the near future - the cable/internet package is going to get nixed.

Hope things work out fathom. I was homeless at pretty recently for about 6 months and it's no fun. Do whatever you can do to keep from getting to that point though, because once you're homeless, it's hard to get out of it.

:( thats turrible :(

Almost homeless? Well I've been there kiddo, it's no walk in the park yessiree. I personally can't believe I made it without my five cycle baths.

PS: I don't mean this as an attack. ;(

I've already been once before. It happens. :\ That one's a funny story, though - one that involves attempted murder, divorce, and fleeing from the police. :lol

I can't stress enough the importance of having good friends and a close family. Everybody needs help sometimes and you need to be there for them as much as you may need them to be there for you, much as it disgusts me to say something that sappy.

Oh, you were serious.

Well, I'm sorry to hear that.

I'll have a picture for you in a minute, Grislygumps, in case you see this. I had to find a cord for my scanner.

:lol

:picklehat

:tear

Oh man FZ

Oh man I feel like a dick for making a stupid joke at your expense :(

I'm sorry man

I regret nothing.

I'd feel bad if you didn't.

MORE LIKE IT'S NOTHING BUT WALKS IN THE PARK :lol

WALKINGS AND SLEEPINGS AND BATHING IN THE FOUNTAININGS

FATHOM I HARDLY THINK THAT A SCANNER CORD IS YOUR TOP PRIORITY

you homeless guys should try living in a car.. Extra points if you have a van...

Get free internet in the library or whenever you get a signal. Take showers in gyms and dont need to worry bout rent =>

wifflys you're so silly

:lol

Every day is a night with the stars!

it's like going camping all the time!

A friend of mine lived in her car for almost two straight weeks after her lease was up. She absolutely loved it. She went to work, spent her evenings in the library, and parked in the corner of a giant commuter lot to sleep. She took showers in a residence hall community bathroom and lived on Jimmy Johns sandwiches.

yeah it isnt that bad.. honestly, anyone should at least try it once

All of that was actually my plan when I go back to school.

get on fnancial aid at school dude. that would help with rent :(

goto the welfare office, especially if you become homeless. They have programs to help you get back into a place.
They also have rent assistance.

Don Carlson sent me a message on Youtube expressing his deepest sympathies.

It's extremely uncomfortable for me to receive pity or well-wishes of people because of my circumstances. You've all made me feel like shit.

How can you live with yourselves?

Just found out definitively that I won't be going to school this semester. Woohoo!

life can really kick you in the balls sometimes :( I'd send money if I had any, if that means anything.

I APPRECIATE THE SENTIMENTS

:pagebrak

Hey FZ, let's see a pic of you mom. Maybe something can be worked out. ;)

There's one lying around the internet. I'LL LEAVE IT TO YOUR INTERNET DETECTIVE SKILLS TO FIND IT.

too lazy :(

I know one thing people overlook is food banks. 1 person can get a weeks worth of food a month with their SS#. If there are more than 1 food banks you can go to each one once a month.

We do that. Some of the stuff you get there's pretty scary, though, like the blank aluminum can with the words "PORK & WATER PRODUCT" stamped on it. :lol

The canned peaches are delicious, to be honest. But it's hard to do peaches wrong.

Yeah, I used to walk to the food bank with my army backpack. I'd go though the bags as soon as I got them and re-donate the crazy ass shit they give you. :eek

I tried to donate to a soup kitchen once, and the priest was a sarcastic bastard because he thought it was a small amount of stuff. I'd saved and saved and bought nice stuff from Sam's because I know that people donate some crazy shit. So I had like one case of spaghetti noodles and one of those flats of Prego spaghetti sauce and something else, and he was an ass to me and I decided not to do it again.

But at least whoever went there got a couple of meals of name brand stuff.

Kitsa : Is the place you live in a magnet for fucktards, or are you an overly critical self loathing paranoid manic depressive?

Take it how you want, the thing is, you have steadily become more and more chaotic.

No shit. MY GOOD DEED WAS SULLIED BY SOMEONE'S CURTNESS!

FZ, BRAW, the basement flooded at my mom's house, and some of my old stuff got ruined :(. My old N64 games are destroyed. I know how you feel in these harsh times.

Did the priest try to molest your child?

no molestation, the priest was just an asshole, and the deed stands regardless of what the asshole did. More of an anecdote than anything, although a priest being a total asshat is hardly news.

I think it's a combination of the fucktard thing and of me hating people more and becoming more of a recluse with every fucktard I encounter.

Edit: my major problem with that whole situation was that they demanded that the priest be there to "recieve" it when I just wanted to drop it off and be done with it.

Fucktard being a relative term and applicable to anyone who isn't yourself because by GOD you are a fucking paragon of wisdom and intellect etc etc etc.

So, my buddy of 30 years has a tutle blog. :rolleyes

Givemhellbrah

http://mail2world.com/blog/ninjaturtle@mail2samurai.com

he's YOUR buddy.

yeah, we grew up together he needs a kick in the balls

That's my friend's favorite video ever. :lol

When I was homeless, I hopped in the food stamp line. It only took a couple weeks and I was able to go into stores and use my food stamps to get food. Well, here it's called a lonestar card, but same deal.

As for places to stay, there's always places being built and worked on. Of course that'll get you trespassing if you're not fast enough to run when you're discovered. I didn't like sleeping in a park or anything. There's shelters here to sleep at but you gotta get there early to get a room each night.

I'm moving to Austin in a year. I'll be joining you in abandoned buildings.

when you move here, come down to san antonio and visit me. we can eat tacos y burritos.

y Pace Picante Sauce

http://simplyrecipes.com/recipes/beef_tacos_de_lengua/

:yum

:( :( :(

RIP CONKERS, REVENGE AND SMASH BROTHERS.

I'm only assuming you had these games and that they were destroyed by mother nature.

You guys I moved to college today

It's raining hard as fuck so I'm just stuck in my dorm and no one else is here

This kind of sucks so far

Wait till you try to find a job based on your educational expertise. :lol

I majored in something good though! Neuroscience! The world needs neurologists, they don't need creative writing majors

Oh who am I kidding I'm probably going to be just as broke as all y'all ;(

:pagebrak

Will you get pussy?