Whores In Denial!!
 

At a football game last night, this girls boyfriend who I've never met before kinda ran off and flirted with some other chicks. He was a little tipsy, but all-and-around a really cool guy, especially for someone she's only been dating for (i think) a month or two.

This is a conversation I had with this guy's girlfriend, who I know pretty well, the day after. Copied and pasted from my AIM client.

a dumb girl: honest wat u think of chris
zak: i really like him, hahah
a dumb girl: n i cant believe u went n got him
a dumb girl: n told him i was mad
zak: huh? why not?
a dumb girl: b.c i didnt no
zak: what, that i told him you were mad? :(
a dumb girl: i not mad
a dumb girl: jus suprised
zak: well, i figured it'd be better to tell him then and there. it made it easier to get him back.
a dumb girl: it was sweet
zak: hahah, thanks.
a dumb girl: hell u were sweeter then him
zak: heh. what can i say, i'm a regular spider-man.
a dumb girl: nah told me if i didnt start swallowin, cling less, or shave Shave
a dumb girl: then he doesnt no how long he'll b around
zak: oh, wow.
zak: that was straight out of left field.
zak: have you done that to him already?
a dumb girl: he had head
a dumb girl: but i dont swallow 2 me tats the only thing taty keeps me from bin a slut
zak: hahah. well, i guess it's good to have limitations.

Everyone knows a girl like this.

...right? Right?

Re: Whores In Denial!!
 

What the hell? :eek

That is what is wrong with the US. >:

You should save that guys from this girl. Go out with him instead. ;<

Oral sex is a sin >:

If she really wasn't a slut, she'd only do it in the butt :(

Re: Whores In Denial!!
 

I pray to whatever gods may listen that these people will die off when a line of Britney Spears endorsed hair product is found to cause a new and distressingly pernicious malady.

Not that I think oral sex is a sin, but sex is sex, and anyone dumb enough to think sex sometimes isn't sex deserves to die at their own hands.

It is awesome if you imagine her saying these things aloud in the way they are spelled.

sex P Pronunciation Key (sks)
n.
A. The property or quality by which organisms are classified as female or male on the basis of their reproductive organs and functions.
B. Either of the two divisions, designated female and male, of this classification.

2. Females or males considered as a group.

3. The condition or character of being female or male; the physiological, functional, and psychological differences that distinguish the female and the male. See Usage Note at gender.

4. The sexual urge or instinct as it manifests itself in behavior.

5. Sexual intercourse.

6. The genitals.



sexual intercourse
n.
1.Coitus between humans.

2.Sexual union between humans involving genital contact other than vaginal penetration by the penis



I'd like to thank dictionary.com for comin' out and keeping the scene alive.

a dumb girl: i not mad
a dumb girl: jus suprised


"Mongo not mad."

You remind me of the ogres in a Xanth novel. :/

if this girl isn't black, i'm afraid you'll need to kill her with a shovel