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-   -   stop the floaters? (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8990)

george Jan 24th, 2004 05:05 PM

stop the floaters?
 
how does one overcome such things?

everytime i got into the bathroom there is a billowy cloud with a fudge stripe floating in the goddamn toilet.

from uhnderneath, as if nestling up for a nap, turds poke out. "hey there good buddy! how the hell are ya?" they call out. just to piss me off i tell you! JUST TO PISS ME OFF!!!

this of course pisses me off, and so i shuffle down the hall bellowing, "who in the hell keeps leaving turds in the toliet? why can't any of you flush? WHY??"

and then the laughing starts :(

"dad hates poop! HA HA HA!!!"

>:

then out right lies :(

"no, daaaaaad, looooooves poooooooop! ewwww-ha HA HA!"

>:

"he wants to marry it!"

>:

"uh oh mom! better watch out MOM, Daddy is gonna divorce you for some POOOOOOOOOP!"

>:

then i run down the hall crying.

and despite my sadness, no one flushes the fucking toilet.

revenge shall be mine.

Jim Duncan - Weather Jan 24th, 2004 05:11 PM

Give them balled up poop for dinner, but tell them it's meatballs, and then do this everytime you find some floating there.

Schimid Jan 24th, 2004 05:17 PM

Put some in their stocking and say that Santa is always watching.

Esuohlim Jan 24th, 2004 05:22 PM

Just say the not flushing the toilet is an unforgivable sin, and tell them they'll go to hell without any doubt.

Then proceed with "Hell Training" to get them ready for it. You could whip them and feed them shards of broken glass while reminding them that "The devil himself is going to be doing this for eternity when you die, so you may as well learn to get used to it first."

george Jan 24th, 2004 05:34 PM

my plan involved a gun, but yours does leave open the option of future torture as well.

Suck 'n' Fuck Jan 24th, 2004 09:17 PM

Try putting your erect penis inside your child's rectum. That should correct the "floater" problem.

george Jan 24th, 2004 09:37 PM

i sense a hidden memory.

Suck 'n' Fuck Jan 24th, 2004 09:40 PM

Oui.

george Jan 24th, 2004 09:43 PM

you should not have worn ass less painties around your father.

prolly no less that you deserve.

Cosmo Electrolux Jan 24th, 2004 10:21 PM

Be thankful that they at least wipe, George... :|

george Jan 24th, 2004 10:53 PM

there is that :)

sadie Jan 26th, 2004 01:11 AM

this sort of thing didn't used to make me feel all puke-y. must be the hormones. :(

Cosmo Electrolux Jan 26th, 2004 07:39 AM

Hi Sadie

sadie Jan 26th, 2004 12:50 PM

hi, cosmo. :)

george Jan 28th, 2004 09:36 PM

hi sadie!

how is my favorite girl to think of smelling doing today?

sadie Jan 29th, 2004 01:07 AM

hi there, george. :)
my day was pretty good, thanks. i watched ry take apart his nintendo and controllers to figure out which wires connected to which buttons. i wrote book descriptions for my parents' internet sales business. i worked on a promo pack for the acoustic act my friend and i do. and i went to a recording session tonight in a friend's basement studio.
how was yours?
p.s. i smell like pearberry today. :P

Cosmo Electrolux Jan 29th, 2004 08:15 AM

pearberry? what is pearberry?

sadie Jan 29th, 2004 06:36 PM

use your imagination. ;) or go to bath & body or something.

Cosmo Electrolux Jan 29th, 2004 07:45 PM

I'll use my imagination ;) yow! :love

george Jan 29th, 2004 09:17 PM

do you smell like pearberry everywhere??

hmm? hmm hmm?

mmm.

sadie Jan 30th, 2004 09:50 PM

not anymore. today it's sun-ripened kiwi.

executioneer Jan 31st, 2004 04:39 AM

loveline forum you guys :(

-willie


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