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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

zeldasbiggestfan Oct 12th, 2016 10:51 PM

Is it with a creepy girl? Or does she clean herself properly and all that?

Tadao Oct 13th, 2016 03:27 PM

YOU HAVE 1 FUCKING JOB!

Cedar Oct 14th, 2016 09:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 771376)
:lol

pack it in, fellas

I blame facebook and reddit for the dead of internet forums

Rongi Oct 15th, 2016 12:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 771377)
guys i'm having a child in january :(

Congrats, big fella

Rongi Oct 15th, 2016 12:56 AM

Looking over the posts I made 5 years ago

I uh, really liked to talk about getting my dick sucked

Rongi Oct 15th, 2016 01:03 AM

Man, kahljorn was a funny motherfucker

I miss this place

Rongi Oct 15th, 2016 01:19 AM

Wow, I was really depressed 5 years ago!

It's ok, 21/22 year old Rongi. Eventually you move to NYC and get into a really good PhD program. Chill out, man.

Rongi Oct 15th, 2016 02:46 AM

I was also racist and homophobic? But ironically or something?

zeldasbiggestfan Oct 15th, 2016 09:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 771379)
YOU HAVE 1 FUCKING JOB!

I DON'T KNOW WHEN TO DO IT D:

Ex Leper Oct 20th, 2016 12:24 AM

Free Halloween compilations enjoy!

Esuohlim Oct 26th, 2016 10:18 PM

nobody wants that

zeldasbiggestfan Nov 9th, 2016 12:59 AM

So, how 'bout that president Trump?

captain516 Nov 9th, 2016 02:55 AM

This is all Stephen Colbert's fault. He should've done more anti-Trump skits!

Grislygus Dec 13th, 2016 09:43 AM

Holy shit Milhouse, you're having a kid?! Part of me wants to offer legitimate congratulations and the other part wants to make a dickish comment. I'll settle on a halfassed, waffling post in which I say nothing of consequence.

Like the old days.

Before certain... People... Were let into the country club.

Grislygus Dec 13th, 2016 09:44 AM

Seriously though details, man! Details!

Tadao Dec 13th, 2016 11:57 AM

Lets see her tits.

10,000 Volt Ghost Dec 14th, 2016 02:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grislygus (Post 771436)
Holy shit Milhouse, you're having a kid?! Part of me wants to offer legitimate congratulations and the other part wants to make a dickish comment. I'll settle on a halfassed, waffling post in which I say nothing of consequence.

Like the old days.

Before certain... People... Were let into the country club.

WTF. Front page this shit.

liquidstatik Dec 15th, 2016 04:06 PM

..

Esuohlim Dec 21st, 2016 09:13 PM

so i fucked some sex into this lady that I live with legally :x there were no tricks and we can afford it, that's already off to a good start :(

i mean i'm gonna be a dang ol' dad in a month you guys, what the fuck :(

liquidstatik Dec 23rd, 2016 01:16 AM

..

Aaarg Dec 27th, 2016 04:37 PM

dads are gay

Tadao Dec 28th, 2016 02:32 PM

I can't wait for Esuohlim's wacky raising a toddler story thread.

captain516 Dec 29th, 2016 11:45 PM

Great Secret Santa this year, guys.

Esuohlim Dec 30th, 2016 12:28 PM

:lol

Esuohlim Dec 30th, 2016 12:36 PM

Here, enjoy a "best of" retrospective from years past:













Tadao Dec 30th, 2016 03:33 PM

:lol

captain516 Dec 31st, 2016 08:36 PM

Those are some good-looking white people.

Pub Lover Jan 1st, 2017 01:28 AM

:pagebrak

bigtimecow Jan 2nd, 2017 03:23 PM

fuck you

zeldasbiggestfan Jan 12th, 2017 11:35 AM

You guys gonna watch the switch event tonight?

Tadao Jan 12th, 2017 06:54 PM

Is that the new Nintendo crap? Fuck them.

stevetothepast Jan 13th, 2017 07:55 AM

The Zelda game looked okay, the Mario one looked horrible, but I haven't been excited for a new video game for a long time now.

zeldasbiggestfan Jan 16th, 2017 02:06 PM

My preorder is in for both versions of Zelda.

I AM SUPER SALTY THAT I DIDN'T GET A SPECIAL EDITION

Esuohlim Jan 18th, 2017 09:30 PM

i'm a dad now you fucks

if anyone wants to come learn what it's like being a dad i'm hosting a seminar on dadchat at 2am ok just click the link below

link

Tadao Jan 19th, 2017 05:17 PM

:squigly

AChimp Jan 19th, 2017 07:46 PM

WHATS UP YOU FUCKERS

zeldasbiggestfan Jan 20th, 2017 08:53 PM

I'M ON MEDICATION THAT MAKES ME SHIT MYSELF LIKE 6 TIMES A DAY RIGHT NOW.

PS congrats, milhouse. WHAT'S THE LITTLE BUGGER'S NAME

Tadao Jan 21st, 2017 04:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 771468)
i'm a dad now you fucks

if anyone wants to come learn what it's like being a dad i'm hosting a seminar on dadchat at 2am ok just click the link below

link

I mentioned it to people, CiG and 10K and The Leader amd MLE are all happy for you. I'm sure others are too if the unblock me.

MarioRPG Jan 24th, 2017 03:22 PM

Aw congratulations Milhouse. That's huge news.
Everybody growing up and stuff. Not me.

captain516 Jan 25th, 2017 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarioRPG (Post 771473)
Aw congratulations Milhouse. That's huge news.
Everybody growing up and stuff. Not me.

You and me both, buddy

Let's party with people we don't like and waste money we don't have while doing everything we can to avoid thinking about time and youth slowly running out without accomplishing anything of merit.

MarioRPG Jan 26th, 2017 07:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by captain516 (Post 771474)
You and me both, buddy

Let's party with people we don't like and waste money we don't have while doing everything we can to avoid thinking about time and youth slowly running out without accomplishing anything of merit.

See? This guy gets it. Literally my biggest news of the past few months is that I almost moved across the country for a meh job, and then didn't.

Nick Feb 3rd, 2017 04:16 AM

I can't believe we're fucking dead

Guitar Woman Mar 14th, 2017 10:01 PM

Has anyone actually died yet?

I mean, I guess we have no way of finding out. My money's on Tadao, me, and whoever else does a similar amount of drugs.

Guitar Woman Mar 14th, 2017 10:04 PM

Happy your kid's birthday btw

Tadao Mar 15th, 2017 07:47 PM

I'm racing my way towards death, so I'm a pretty good bet. I don't know how I would find out if GW died. Fucking Otto was so suicidal I had to remove him from Facebook. He might be dead.

zeldasbiggestfan Mar 18th, 2017 01:45 PM

I'm alive, and in a new apartment :o

Esuohlim Mar 18th, 2017 01:57 PM

RIP FartinMowler :lol

jk :lol

i hope kellychaos is dead

captain516 Mar 23rd, 2017 01:31 AM

I hope Chuck Barris dies too, fuck that guy

WhiteRat Apr 20th, 2017 04:01 PM

This place is on it's last few breaths me thinks.

I'm now the proud poppa of a college degree (at the age of 32 even!) from a fancy pants private university thanks to the bi-partisan Post 9/11 GI Bill, which footed the entire 130k bill. Now I just have to find me one of them newfangled jobs everyone has been talking about...

Tadao Apr 21st, 2017 05:45 PM


Tadao Apr 21st, 2017 05:45 PM


Aaarg Apr 24th, 2017 09:29 PM

im moving to chicago in less than a week wut up I-Mackery

Tadao Apr 26th, 2017 05:47 PM

Chicago, from N Carolina?

Babs Apr 27th, 2017 01:02 AM

Found someone lonely enough to marry me. Truly an all time low for humanity. P.s. Snape kills Dumbledore.

zeldasbiggestfan Apr 27th, 2017 01:26 AM

I'm making enough money to survive, holy shit guys. I AM LIVING THE DREAM HERE, BE PROUD OF LIL' OL' Z-BIFF

Aaarg Apr 27th, 2017 04:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 771503)
Chicago, from N Carolina?

yeh. 10 hour drive, me and my ol' cat, everything i own in a midsized sedan. sunday.

Tadao Apr 27th, 2017 04:55 PM

Good luck my dood. If it's only 10 hours away, then I assume you know your way around Chicago.

WhiteRat Apr 28th, 2017 07:20 PM

I went to Chicago once. I watched a college football game in Evanston (what a lame city and campus) and then got drunk at a bunch of different bars around Wrigleyville. It was a fun time and I would visit again (except Evanston. What a lame city and campus).

WhiteRat Apr 28th, 2017 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aaarg (Post 771506)
yeh. 10 hour drive, me and my ol' cat, everything i own in a midsized sedan. sunday.

When I moved to San Antonio from Saint Paul I drove 23 hours in an SUV with my cat. She freaked out so bad within 10 mins of being in the carrier that I let her out and she spent the entire trip hiding under the driver seat. She did the same thing when I eventually moved back. That cat has logged some serious miles. :rock

zeldasbiggestfan Apr 28th, 2017 08:16 PM

My old cat Zelda went to KC and a few other places efore she died. She meowed like crazy, but she had diabetes and I didn't wanna let her go.

Getting older is no fun

Tadao Apr 28th, 2017 08:36 PM

Moved with my cat in the car on a 12 hour drive. No carrier. She sat on top of stuff on the passenger seat and meowed loudly at me for 10 hours. I went to Chicago for a concert and visited the museum. Food is good.

Esuohlim May 2nd, 2017 08:50 PM

I LIVE IN CHICAGO

I WILL HAVE TO MOVE IF AAARG IS COMING THOUGH

Aaarg May 3rd, 2017 12:49 PM

get to moving, son, i'm in humboldt park now.

after about 9 hours of driving, i got a flat tire. good stuff.

i've let my cat ride freely before, it wasn't great. she meowed for about two hours, then kept quiet and just endured. THEN she had to spend two nights in a house with 4 other cats. she was not happy. now she's good!

Tadao May 3rd, 2017 02:58 PM

What's that you say? Cats don't like change? Hold on, let me get a pen and paper.

Aaarg May 3rd, 2017 06:32 PM

other things to note:
- fluffy tail
- pointy ear
- some teeth
- need water for life

zeldasbiggestfan May 4th, 2017 01:37 PM

TRACKS LITTER ALL OVER THE GODDAMN FLOOR >:

Pub Lover May 7th, 2017 08:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 771468)
i'm a dad now you fucks

OMG! Congrats! Your wife now has evidence that she did teh secks! :eek

Now we just have to wait on the paternity test to find out if you did, Esuohlim. :lol
Quote:

Originally Posted by AChimp (Post 771470)
WHATS UP YOU FUCKERS

I am not a fucker. :posh

I'm a wanker. :wank :tear :orgasm :x
Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 771472)
I mentioned it to people, CiG and 10K and The Leader amd MLE are all happy for you. I'm sure others are too if the unblock me.

You've got there an astonishing number of people that seem to only selectively block people. :eek

I can't remember what I did to alienate everyone here. :lol
Quote:

Originally Posted by MarioRPG (Post 771473)
Everybody growing up and stuff. Not me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by captain516 (Post 771474)
Let's party with people we don't like and waste money we don't have while doing everything we can to avoid thinking about time and youth slowly running out without accomplishing anything of merit.

Looks like we've got some contenders still fighting me for most pathetic. :eek

Guys, you'll never beat me. :lol

zeldasbiggestfan May 11th, 2017 03:21 PM

I'm sweating my ass off in a laundromat because my totally sweet new apartment has bed bugs. It's a really good time.

Fuck

Esuohlim May 12th, 2017 03:52 PM

You're a fucking whiner, zeldasfattestfan. In some countries people would grateful to eat those bedbugs

zeldasbiggestfan May 14th, 2017 03:46 PM

I know man, I'm too negative.

TELL YOUR BABY MAKER HAPPY MOM'S DAY OR WHATEVER PEOPLE OF YOUR CULTURE AND STATURE DO

Esuohlim May 20th, 2017 11:45 AM

look zbf I know you've been here a while now, but I don't see that you've submitted a collection of dick picks from all angles for our Secret Forum's Dick Pick Megathread (we even have Kitsa's).

until you do you can't be one of the Gang. pm Pub Lover for details

Tadao May 20th, 2017 01:03 PM

Surprisingly, only one person here has received a pic of my dick.

zeldasbiggestfan May 23rd, 2017 09:48 PM

My d*ck is all over the place man. That weird smell at the laundromat?

That's my d*ck, homie. Free smells for all. And if you want to see it, just inhale deeply through the nose with closed eyes. At least that's how my ladyfriend finds it

Esuohlim May 24th, 2017 08:54 PM

man

why we gotta put up with you

zeldasbiggestfan May 25th, 2017 10:49 AM

Because unfortunately, we seem to be the only ones here :(

I miss everyone, and the time when we all could post and get shit on by eachother by the end of the day. Now we gotta wait a week and read 2 replies. I miss this place

Tadao May 25th, 2017 12:12 PM

Fucking fecalpheliac

zeldasbiggestfan May 25th, 2017 01:13 PM

Thanks man, I needed that. I miss you too, bb ;)

Aaarg May 27th, 2017 01:48 PM

woah rude

zeldasbiggestfan May 28th, 2017 04:23 PM

Don't take it all personally, I miss you too man!

captain516 May 28th, 2017 11:27 PM

I was smoking a bowl earlier and had some nice thoughts about this site (more specifically, the forums).
All the people that used to gather here have pretty much moved on. You got the last of the last holdouts like Tadao, Zelda, Aaaaarg, and that guy who only posts in the Television and Film thread. But for the most part, anybody who was once here has ended their association with the site. Who the fuck knows what they're up to now? Having fucking babies and shit, probably. Most of the users here were good guys and I wish them all the best. For example, I hope Willie is losing his weight and I hope that Guitar Woman has long ago OD'd on heroin.
The very people that founded this website? Where are they now? Rog is doing computer shit, I know that much. But what about Protoclown? Max Burbank? They're probably doing fine, but the important thing is that they've all grown past this. They've moved on.
It's crazy how long I-Mockery has been around, and it's crazy to compare the total post numbers over the years. I wonder if any of the past forum members even remember coming here anymore.


If all that sounded gay as fuck, I'm sorry. I can't be a fag in real life so I have to do it through my writing.

Tadao May 29th, 2017 12:07 AM

They all got murdered. It's a big whodunit.

Aaarg May 29th, 2017 02:46 AM

earlier this month i met somebody who has been an internet acquaintance since 2000. our association is old enough to have a license and a job, and is far older than any of my ~irl~ friendships (those that i haven't actively damaged or passively neglected to death at least).

RIP message boards as a social medium

zeldasbiggestfan May 29th, 2017 01:37 PM

I still see gw post here once in awhile. I still have Seththomas's address somewhere. I always wanted to send him a nice pipe and tobacco as an apology for years ago. He may not even remember this place.

I love you, bitches. All of ya.

Esuohlim May 30th, 2017 09:07 PM

All these people are on facebook using their real names and talking to each other there instead of talking to fake names with fucking zelda avatars

zeldasbiggestfan May 31st, 2017 03:02 PM

And letting me know that OREO O'S ARE COMING BACK. WHAT THE FUCK

Sebra Jun 4th, 2017 06:44 PM

I saw Jixby Phillips @ the big auditorium downtown a few months ago. He is getting laid on the reg by all sorts of chicks

All Hail Duke Jun 6th, 2017 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by captain516 (Post 771540)
that guy who only posts in the Television and Film thread.


well i don't really have a hell of a lot to say

Tadao Jun 6th, 2017 10:09 PM

Yeah Captain you fucking fuck fuck.

Tadao Jun 6th, 2017 10:11 PM

Sacks hasn't posted in his thread since January. I hope he didn't dead.

Dr. V Jun 9th, 2017 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 771544)
All these people are on facebook using their real names and talking to each other there instead of talking to fake names with fucking zelda avatars

To be fair, there's a fair amount of dipshits on facebook with zelda avatars.

zeldasbiggestfan Jun 10th, 2017 03:02 AM

Duke's response made me lol hard

Aaarg Jun 10th, 2017 08:52 PM

zeldasbiggestflan

UP_SHUT Jun 11th, 2017 07:49 PM

This is the first time I've logged in about 10 years.
What a mind fuck.

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 12th, 2017 12:27 AM

So we went to dinner at this classy Italian ristorante and this girl came. It was her first time going out after having her baby so she wasn't used to alcohol.

She went on this five minute drunken rant about how teenagers have it so easy with websites because they just click and drag pictures where they want them to be. They didn't have to figure out html coding for pages if you wanted bouncing stars next to words or even have text that is the color red.

At the end of the rant she raised her wine glass in the air like she was going to empty a clip and yelled at the top of her lungs:

HTML MMOOOOTTTTHHHEEEERRRRFFFFFUUUCCCKKKKEEEERRRRRSSSSS S

zeldasbiggestfan Jun 14th, 2017 08:15 PM

That dude who shot that senator today is from my hometown :o

Fucking weird

Tadao Jun 15th, 2017 12:00 AM

You should run for Senate.

Aaarg Jun 15th, 2017 10:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 771562)
So we went to dinner at this classy Italian ristorante and this girl came.

DANG BRO

captain516 Jun 17th, 2017 03:04 PM

Bitches love pasta

Tadao Jun 17th, 2017 06:17 PM

You fill your bitch up on pasta? Get classy my dude and get that bitch some lobster.

Sam Jun 17th, 2017 09:21 PM

Tell that bitch she gonna get her own lobster.


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