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-   -   Why put testicles in harms way? (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=14880)

FartinMowler Nov 6th, 2004 07:26 PM

Why put testicles in harms way?
 
I wonder why testicles are there? If you could re-design the human form from scratch....what would you do? I would tuck the balls in and have a penis that retracts neatly into your body and when excited fires out making a cool sound, like someone falling down some stairs.

HickMan Nov 6th, 2004 08:30 PM

I'd put them behind my rib cage and have real chesticles ;o

Esuohlim Nov 6th, 2004 09:38 PM

Someone should tell the apostrophe in your other Loveline thread's title to come over to this one instead.

FartinMowler Nov 6th, 2004 10:37 PM

Esuohspellingfuckyousislm >:

Helm Nov 6th, 2004 11:07 PM

More about apostrophes.

sadie Nov 7th, 2004 12:05 AM

lol @ esuohlim.

MrAdventure Nov 7th, 2004 12:19 AM

oh man hahaha good post fartin!

you guys oughta just stop bein so rude to fartin hes a okay dude by me!

Perndog Nov 7th, 2004 03:15 AM

"Apostrophe" sounds Greek.

Helm, explain.

Emu Nov 7th, 2004 10:49 AM

fartin are you one of those people who writes 16 page reports on the problems with the unavailability of hooker-adjascent condom machines

AChimp Nov 7th, 2004 10:56 AM

Testicles are located outside of the body keep them cooler. Sperm production would fail if they were internal because the temperature is too hot inside the body.

:themoreyouknow

XForeverMooreX Nov 7th, 2004 11:31 AM

testie~
 
are u like a doctor or something???

Perndog Nov 7th, 2004 12:35 PM

So why don't we have sperm that can survive internal body temperature, like birds and all those other animals with internal testes?

GADZOOKS Nov 7th, 2004 12:44 PM

Because god created us to be in his image and he liked girls sucking his balls.

sadie Nov 7th, 2004 02:16 PM

the crux of the biscuit is the apostrophe.

Terra Nov 7th, 2004 07:05 PM

More on biscuits please.

Helm Nov 7th, 2004 07:45 PM

Apostrophe is a greek word. There's nothing very remarkable about it. Basically, 'apo' stands for an ancient but pretty elaborate method of masturbation where a person takes a thin long stick and proceeds to beat on his penis in fast symmetrical strokes until an orgasm is achieved. 'Strophe' is just greek for 'turn' as in taking a turn in your life, possibly liquidating all funds and assets you have, joining a doomsday cult to which you proceed to give all said money and whatnot before agonizingly dying by the multiple gunshot wounds you've achieved to your own head because you bought too small a caliber of a gun.

McMock Nov 7th, 2004 08:40 PM

I would put mine on international television so that you can all admire them.

Terra Nov 7th, 2004 08:48 PM

Testicles or apostrophe's?

And which channel will this be on (time and date also).

Thanks.

Anonymous Nov 7th, 2004 09:23 PM

Biscuit

A biscuit is a type of food. The exact meaning varies in different parts of the world. The origin of the word biscuit is from a Middle French word meaning "twice cooked".

American English meaning

In American English "biscuit" means a form of bread similar to a roll made with baking powder or baking soda as a rising agent rather than yeast (rolls made with yeast are often called "yeast rolls" to distinguish them, and biscuits and corn bread are sometimes referred to collectively as "quick bread").

Biscuits are a common feature of Southern US cuisine. They are similar to scones but served as a side dish with a main meal or as a breakfast item. Biscuits are often eaten with butter and jam or jelly or as part of a dish called biscuits and gravy which consists of biscuits covered with small pieces of loose sausage and with a white gravy made from sausage drippings. Biscuits are also eaten covered in pizza sauce and cheese as very small pizzas.

British English meaning

In British English a biscuit is a harder baked product which in North America would be called a "cookie" or "cracker". Many regional varieties, both sweet and savoury exist, often produced in industrial quantities by large food concerns. Sweet biscuits are commonly eaten as a snack and may contain chocolate, fruit, jam or nuts. Savoury biscuits are plainer and commonly eaten with cheese following a meal.

A basic biscuit recipe includes flour, shortening (often lard), baking powder or soda, and milk (buttermilk or sweet milk). Common variations involve cheese or sugar.

Varieties

Common biscuit types include:

Bath Oliver biscuits
Bourbon biscuits
Cream crackers
Digestive biscuits
Lincoln biscuits
Nice biscuits
Shortbread
Water biscuits

McMock Nov 7th, 2004 09:57 PM

It will be on the CNN, and the headline will be 'worlds biggest balls discovered that aren't from that elephantiasis or whatever disease that makes them all blown up like'. As for the when, em... probably next week sometime.

Terra Nov 7th, 2004 10:05 PM

Elephantiasis is the correct disease.

Awesome. I hope your cock is as big as your testicles because I don't think I would want a normal sized dick sitting atop of two gargantuan twins. It would look odd, my man. Odd.

I'll look forward to the footage.

racialslur Nov 7th, 2004 11:26 PM

I watched "Travel Sick 2" and the guy was in india, and for a challenge, he had to wash an elephants penis. It was about three feet long. Which means that somewhere, a woman is trying to suck one off for a beastiality video.

BlueOatmeal Nov 8th, 2004 02:52 AM

I hate stupid lighter with child protection. Why should I have to work hard to light my cigerette? It would be nasty to have my testicles inside of my body. I mean how the fuck am I suppose to shave them?

DeadKennedys Nov 8th, 2004 07:19 AM

Re: testie~
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by XForeverMooreX
are u like a doctor or something???

No, he's just very bored and lonely.

Terra Nov 8th, 2004 07:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BlueOatmeal
I hate stupid lighter with child protection. Why should I have to work hard to light my cigerette? It would be nasty to have my testicles inside of my body. I mean how the fuck am I suppose to shave them?

You could swallow some Nair. :)


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